Without a Doubt

by Lindsay Paige

  “Hello?” I answer, giving in to myself.

  “Hey, Emerson,” she says, her voice sounding as perfect as the last time I heard it. “How are you?” A handful of simple words rocks me to my core. I lean against the counter to steady myself.

  “I'm fine. What...why are you calling? Is everything okay?” Something has to be wrong, right? Otherwise, why break her silence?

  There's a pause before she says, “Everything's fine. I wanted to hear from you.” Another pause. “It's been a long time.”

  No shit. I hear the shower turn off. Damn it. Now would not be the time to explain this to Eva, not after the day she's had. But if everything is fine with Kelly, if she's moved on like my parents say she has, why is she calling me?

  I grimace as I make a decision. “It has been a long time, but I can't talk tonight, Kelly. I'm sorry.”

  “It's okay. I missed you and I wanted to hear from you, even if for a couple of minutes. I really just want to know if you've been doing okay.”

  “I'm doing great,” I tell her honestly. The sound of Eva's footsteps are coming down the hall. “I'm sorry, but I need to go,” I say again. “You could call tomorrow?”

  “It's okay,” she repeats. “I might. Bye, Emerson.”

  “Bye.” I hang up, slip my phone back into my pocket, and lift the basket from the fryer since the fries are done. Eva walks into the kitchen.

  “I feel a little better now,” she says, grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge.

  “Good. Fries are done.” I plate them and sit them down in front of where she's taking a seat at the bar.

  “You actually made fries?”

  I nod. “I thought I had some in the freezer, but I didn't. So, you get some homemade ones instead.”

  “Thanks, Emerson. Really. You're a day-saver.” Then, she gives me her beautiful smile. I take a seat to her right as she starts digging into her fries. “Since I'm nosey and all, you probably won't mind that I raided your cabinets for some cream for my burns. I felt like I should tell you anyway.”

  I chuckle. “I don't mind. Your burn looks pretty bad.” The burn is about two inches down from her elbow. It's still bright red. There are three lines right on top of one another.

  “Hurt like a mother, too. It was so busy, I had to bake more bread. When I went to pull out the trays, I hit the side of the oven each time,” she explains. “When exactly do I get my surprise?” Her grin is the best thing I've seen all evening.

  “After you eat. In fact, why don't you do that while I get it ready?”

  “Okay.”

  I walk to my bedroom, and first, I change my clothes and get ready for bed. Then, I grab her surprise from my closet. It's seriously not much and I hope she's not disappointed, thinking it's something better than what it is. She happens to fall asleep here often, sometimes spends the night, and since I've been given the green light to share the bed with her and I'm apparently a cover hog, this seemed necessary.

  The new, freshly washed black comforter takes up the side of the bed she slept on before. Now, she has her own comforter, and I have mine. I won't 'hog' the covers if we each have our own.

  “You're officially the sweetest.”

  I turn to see Eva standing in the doorway with a large smile. “I didn't want one of us to sleep on the couch again.”

  Eva closes the distance between us. She slips an arm around my waist and gives me a short kiss. “You're fantastic, Emerson. Seriously. Thank you for everything today.”

  “You're welcome. It's still pretty early. Do you want to watch a movie?”

  She nods, and we return to the living room. I sit with my back resting on the armrest, my legs stretched out on the other cushions, and Eva sits between them, resting against my chest. I let her pick out a movie on Netflix. Now that we're settled and not talking, my mind wanders back to Kelly.

  She said she was calling to see how I was doing. That's it? She could ask my mom that. Shouldn't I be overwhelmed with happiness at hearing from her? I'm not going to lie; I am happy she called. A bit of guilt eats at me with the thought. Here I am with Eva in my arms, soothing her after a bad day, and I'm thinking about Kelly. It's not right. Maybe I don't need to think about it too much. Kelly didn't call and say she missed me and wanted to get together. She missed me and wanted to see how I was doing.

  Maybe that's all there is to it.

  Then again, I didn't give her a lot of opportunity to say much.

  I sigh, not wanting to think about it. She's supposed to call tomorrow. If she does, then I can think more about it then.

  A hard pinch to my side makes me glance down at Eva, who has lifted her head to look at me. Her brows are bunched together slightly and more guilt rises at seeing I've caused her to be concerned. “You okay?”

  “Yeah, I'm fine.”

  She hesitates before focusing back on the movie. After a moment, she says, “You never told me why your day was bad.”

  “Oh, it's nothing compared to yours. I was late for a class and the professor won't let you in if you're late, so I missed it.”

  “That's all?” she laughs.

  “Yeah, that's all.”

  “Well, I'm sorry you missed your class.”

  “It's all right.”

  We're quiet throughout the rest of the movie and crawling into bed. Eva snuggles up with her comforter, tucking it in down her sides before she scoots over to cuddle against me.

  “If I wake up and you manage to have both comforters, I can't promise a gentle, accidental shove off the bed won't happen again,” she warns.

  I laugh. “Does that mean the first time wasn't an accident?”

  “No. It means the next time won't be.”

  “We should be fine.”

  Eva props herself up on her elbow and looks at me. “I'm really glad it was you I rear-ended, Emerson.” She leans forward, kissing me softly.

  “Me too.” And I mean it without a doubt.

  Not once during the night did I find myself on the floor, so I didn't hog the covers. When I first wake up, all I can smell is that soft, sweet scent of Eva's. The only thing better than that is hearing her incoherent grumbles when I wake her up. I don't know why, but I think it's one of my favorite things about her. She doesn't wake up and smile at me. She mumbles and groans, even grunts sometimes, and after about five minutes, I still don't get a smile. It's not until a few more minutes later when she'll unleash one in my direction.

  I tug on one of her curls. “We should probably get up for real now,” I tell her since we're still very much in bed.

  “If we didn't have to get up until right now, you could have let me sleep a little longer.”

  “Yeah, and then it would take you ten more minutes to want to get out of bed.”

  “So?” I laugh, and she adds, “I'm too comfortable, Emerson. You're too comfortable.” That would be a more accurate statement, considering her head is on my shoulder, her arm thrown over my chest, and one of her legs snuck underneath my blankets to lie over my legs as well.

  “We have class in an hour,” I remind her.

  “Sounds like you need to get ready first then.” When I get out of bed, leaving her arms, she says, “Crap, I didn't think that through.”

  Chuckling, I kiss her forehead. “Don't fall back asleep.”

  “I'll see what I can do.”

  She doesn't fall asleep. Instead, when I get out of the shower, I find her in the kitchen. The smell of breakfast brings me in here before I go to the bedroom to get dressed. Eva hasn't noticed me yet. She's putting together egg and bacon sandwiches.

  “You fixed breakfast?”

  Eva glances over her shoulder before doing a double take. “Uh, yeah. Shouldn't you be getting dressed?”

  “Am I making you uncomfortable?” I ask teasingly.

  “As uncomfortable as you would be if I walked into the room wearing only a towel.” She picks up her sandwich, takes a bite, and then faces me. “You can't have yours until you put on clothes.”

>   I laugh. “Okay, okay.”

  By the time I change and make it back to the kitchen, Eva is walking past me to take her own shower. I eat my sandwich and then start getting my books together. I'm grabbing a pen from the end table in the living room when I hear, “Emerson.” I lift my head to see Eva leaning against the threshold of the hallway. A white towel is wrapped around her body and her hair. I swallow hard at the sight of her. Ample cleavage looks strained from underneath the towel, one of her legs is showing from the hip down thanks to her not having the towel completely wrapped around her, and her damp skin shines.

  “Just wanted to prove a point,” she says before turning and walking to my bedroom.

  “Feel free to prove points more often,” I call after her, causing her to laugh.

  When we finally arrive on campus, we're cutting it close to being late. I give her a kiss and say, “Try to have a good day, but if not, let me know and I'll be your day-saver again.”

  She grins. “Same to you.”

  We part ways and go about our days. It's like after that my attention is divided between what I'm doing and checking my phone. All day, I obsessively check it for a text or a call from Kelly. The seconds turn to minutes and the minutes turn to hours. The only people who text me are Eva and Glen. The only person to call is my mother. The day comes and goes and Kelly doesn't contact me.

  The guilt from hoping she would, of feeling like this is a betrayal to Eva, keeps me from calling her instead. Kelly doesn't want to get back together, and I don't want to be faced with the possibility of having to end things with Eva. Maybe it's for the best this way.

  I never thought I'd face this day. It's always been Kelly; wanting her, loving her, and waiting for her. The possibility that there could be someone else never crossed my mind. I don't know where things might go with Eva, but I do know I want to find out.

  Thursday, I work and do homework. Friday is much of the same. Eva is hanging out with Catherine tonight, so when Glen texts me about meeting at a restaurant and bar, I agree to go. It's a hot spot on Friday nights because they'll have live bands play and if there's a game on, it'll be playing in the background on the flat-screen TVs. It's been awhile since we last went.

  When I arrive, Glen is flirting with the waitress at the small high-top table. I take a seat and order a sweet tea once she pays attention to me.

  “Have you gotten her number yet?” I ask as she walks away.

  Glen grins. “Right before you walked in.”

  I laugh. Ever since Glen's girlfriend, Lori, broke up with him in February, he's been hopping from one girl to the next. He's torn up over it, which is completely understandable, all things considered, but I don't think going after every girl he meets is helping him. How he recovers and heals is his prerogative and unless it becomes harmful, I'm not saying a word. “How long have you been here?”

  “Not even five minutes. I'm starting to impress myself.”

  “I bet.”

  We make small talk for a while, order some food and a couple of beers. The live band they have booked for tonight plays mostly rock music. They're taking a break when Glen takes a pull from his beer then asks a question.

  “How's it going with Eva?”

  “Shouldn't you already know?”

  He shakes his head. “It's never good to answer a question with a question. What? Have you finally heard from Kelly or something?” When I glance down at my beer and don't answer right away, he shoves my shoulder. “What the fuck, Emerson? You do realize you're dating my cousin, right?”

  “Don't get riled up until I explain. I don't have to tell you at all, you know.”

  “Yeah, well, it'll be in your best interest to tell me before I kick your ass. Have you told Eva yet?”

  “No.” I take a deep breath. “She called the other night, but I didn't talk to her long because Eva was with me, and she never called me back.”

  “Wait, Eva was with you?”

  “Yeah. She was having a bad day, so she was staying at my place. She was in the shower when Kelly called. Kelly said she missed me and wanted to see how I was doing. That's it. I told her I couldn't talk, but she could call me back the next day and she didn't.”

  “And you didn't call her?” I shake my head. “Don't mess with me, Emerson. All you did freshman year was mope over this chick and you're telling me you didn't call her back? Why?”

  “Because of Eva,” I answer simply. Glen seems stunned speechless. “Don't look at me like that, Glen. It was one phone call, the first in over a year, and she didn't say anything about getting back together. We were friends first, so she could have been calling to simply check in. Was I tempted to call her back? Yeah, but I didn't. Because of Eva. Kelly chose not to call again, and that means something.”

  Glen stares at me for a moment. “I still don't like this. There should be one girl in the entire picture, not two.”

  “Kelly isn't in the picture.”

  “Bullshit! You're telling me if she called you again and said she wanted you back, you wouldn't go running?”

  I take a long pull from my beer, thinking it over. “The thing is, she did call and didn't say that.”

  Glen watches me, not saying anything for a bit. “This time, she didn't. If—”

  “Look, I didn't call her back because I'm with Eva, and I don't want that to change. I doubt Kelly will call again, and if she does, Eva will be the first to know. In the mean time, I don't see the point in telling her over nothing. If you're worried about me wronging Eva, then stop worrying.”

  His eyes narrow. “I'll feel better and stop worrying when you can tell me that if Kelly were to want you back, you wouldn't leave Eva without a second thought. It's easy for you to say all this shit about not talking to her because of Eva when you don't think she wants to get back together. If she did, you would be having second thoughts, and that is what bothers me.”

  I don't say anything because that's what bothers me too.

  “SO, WHO'S THIS guy you've been seeing?” I ask Catherine. We're spending the night binge-watching Grey's Anatomy on Netflix and eating all the popcorn and candy we can manage.

  “His name is Parker. I met him in the library one night when I was studying and researching for a paper.” She pops a piece of popcorn into her mouth. “That's my favorite thing about us.”

  “There's an us?”

  She nods. “Yep. I really like him. He's quiet and soft spoken, but the boy knows how to be assertive and confident and take matters into his own hands.”

  I laugh. “He sounds like a good fit for you.”

  Catherine rips open a candy bar and adds, “He's a virgin too. Well, he was one.”

  My eyes nearly pop out of my head. “Catherine! You took his virginity? Oh, my goodness. How did this happen?”

  “We had sex,” she says simply, and we both crack up laughing. “He hasn't dated anyone for an extended period of time, so he never got to the sex.”

  “He's only been seeing you for two weeks,” I point out.

  She grins. “What can I say? He really likes me. How's it going with Emerson?”

  “Good. He's been really sweet to me.” I go on to tell her about what he did for me when I was having a bad day. “He has a toothbrush and a comforter for me over at his place, too.”

  “A comforter? Why?”

  “He steals the blankets, so now I have my own.”

  Catherine's phone beeps and she picks it up. After a moment, she starts moving her thumbs. Then she glances over at me with a sly smile. “It seems I've created a sexaholic—”

  “That's not a word,” I chuckle.

  “Either way, it's a fact. Don't you want to spend the night with Emerson tomorrow, so I can have the dorm all to myself?” She grins. “Please?”

  “If Emerson is free—” Catherine grabs my phone. “What are you doing?”

  “Sending Emerson a text to ensure any plans he has tomorrow involve you.” When she's done sending the text, she hands it back to me. My jaw drops
as I read the dirty message with explicit details about what I supposedly want to do tomorrow night.

  “Catherine! I haven't had sex with him yet!”

  My phone starts ringing with a call from Emerson.

  She laughs. “Sorry?”

  I glare at her before answering, “Hello.”

  Emerson clears his throat. “Um, Eva, want to explain why I nearly spit my beer all over Glen?” Then he adds, “Are you serious? I mean, I thought—”

  “I know. Sorry. Catherine sent it because she wants to make sure I'm not here tomorrow night. I didn't know you were with Glen.”

  “It's all right. I work, but I get off at seven if you want to come over.”

  “I work too, so I'll be there around nine. Thanks.”

  “Thanks, Emerson!” Catherine shouts.

  He laughs. “You're both welcome.”

  We hang up and I playfully shove Catherine. “I still can't believe you!”

  “I can't believe you haven't had sex with him yet. I mean, if you aren't ready, then I get that. I just thought after how you've raved about him, then you would be ready.”

  I steal the popcorn bag from her and eat a handful before I reply. “I wasn't ready, and the whole ex-girlfriend thing made me hesitate even more. But now?” I shrug. “Maybe I'll do those things you texted Emerson about.”

  Catherine laughs, and thankfully, we go back to watching the show.

  “Glen! What are you doing here?” I walk down the counter to where I can lean over to hug him.

  “I came to see you and get something to eat before you close.” We go to the other end, so I can start making his favorite sub. “I haven't seen much of you lately. Think you'll want to hang out Monday?”

  “Yeah, sure. Want to do dinner? Chinese, maybe?” Glen nods. “Sorry I haven't been around much. Between school and work and—”