Madison Johns - Agnes Barton 07 - High Seas Honeymoon

by Madison Johns

  “No, I’m rarely hot.”

  “I just hope that I don’t bump into anyone else I know here. So far this is the strangest honeymoon ever,” I said.

  “Pretty soon it will be right up you alley,” Leotyne said.

  I had to wonder now what she meant, but with my dealings with Leotyne, you just never knew what she was talking about. Ever since she had rolled into Tawas that time I was living at the campground for a spell, I quickly found out that she considered herself a fortune teller. I guess it came with the whole Romanian thing. Anyway, every time she shared anything with me, it was always in the way of a riddle as a direct warning.

  I smiled in greeting at the four other women in their group. They introduced themselves as Ruby, Pearl, Violet, and Lenore.

  “Nice to meet you ladies.”

  “Didn’t you gals just get married?” Ruby asked, rubbing a hand over her unusually long facial hair that was over her lip.

  “Yes, but Denise told us we could check out the bridge with you.”

  “Hardly seems fair to me,” Pearl said.

  “Now, ladies, let’s be nice,” Denise began. “We’re all from Tawas and as such, we need to all get along. It’s not like they’re going to all of our activities. They’re on their honeymoon.”

  “I didn’t mean it exactly that way,” Pearl said. “But we paid to get extras on our trip.”

  “Not to worry. Everyone in the group will have plenty of opportunities to do some exciting activities while we’re here, like tonight, when we have dinner with the captain.”

  Eleanor frowned now. “Lucky ducks,” she said.

  I nudged Eleanor. “Now don’t make them feel bad.”

  “I wasn’t. I’d just love to have dinner with the captain, too.”

  “I’m sure you will at some point,” Martha said. “You girls are good at getting what you want.”

  My brow raised as I said, “I think you might be speaking about yourself, Martha.”

  “No need to get into a family argument over this,” Denise said. “We better head to the bridge now or we’ll be too late.”

  Eleanor and I followed the pack of ladies that had paid for the privilege to see the goings on at where they steer the ship. I didn’t like how some of them had made us feel like we didn’t belong, but I decided not to let that bother me.

  We were soon on the elevator going down, and each floor we passed made me feel a whole bunch better. On the main deck, we weaved our way to where a gold door stood with a portal window to look out. Denise pushed a doorbell of sorts and door was promptly opened by a young man wearing an all-white uniform with gold shoulder patches that signified he was the captain.

  “We’re here from the Sunrise Side Lifelong Learning for our tour,” Denise said.

  “Of course. I’ve been expecting you.”

  We walked inside and there was a beautiful sight of only blue ocean ahead. I marveled at all the new-fangled buttons and levers. I pressed a hand to my chest and asked, “Who’s steering the ship?”

  “It’s on autopilot. We usually do that once we’re out to sea,” the captain explained. “I’m Captain Hamilton, and these are my navigation officers, Theo and Gunner Flynn. They’re twins and they watch over the bridge so I can do my other duties, like making sure things are running smoothly and speaking with the passengers.”

  Eleanor beamed. “Like inviting some of them to have dinner with you?”

  “Yes, I expect you ladies will be dining with me tonight.”

  “Not them. They’re not part of our group,” Ruby said, giving her gray hair a pat.

  “I’m sure we can make room for them.”

  “We’re actually on our honeymoon,” I said. “And that would have to include our husbands.”

  “Perhaps another night, tomorrow?”

  “Sounds like a plan,” Eleanor said.

  I half expected Eleanor to stick her tongue out at Ruby and was almost shocked when she didn’t. I was happy that she was acting decent in front of the captain, at least.

  Eleanor walked over and asked, as she poised to move a lever, “What does this knob do?”

  “Don’t touch that. It sets off the alarm that the ship is about to sink,” Captain Hamilton said with a wink.

  “You seem awfully young,” I said. “Exactly how old are you?”

  “Thirty-five. I’ve been on cruise ships most of my life. My father was a captain on the Princess line. You could say that cruises are in my blood.”

  “I’m Agnes and this is my friend Eleanor,” I said.

  “Nice to meet you ladies.”

  Denise, not wanting to be left out, introduced the others in the group. Martha then saddled up to the captain and took hold of his arm. “Are you currently single?” She laughed.

  “Very single, but I have a firm policy to never become involved with any of the passengers. It makes for smoother sailing.” He then laughed at his joke.

  “That must be hard to do with all the passengers running around half dressed,” Eleanor said. “Aren’t you ever tempted, even a little?”

  “It’s natural to be, but I just don’t look at anyone on this cruise ship in that way. Women weren’t put on earth to be sexualized. I respect women.”

  “He must be gay,” Eleanor whispered in my ear. “So, this ship is safe, then?” Eleanor asked.

  “Very. I’ve never had a cruise where anything happened out of the way, even with passengers. Sunburn is the extent of it.”

  “No icebergs this far south either,” Theo said.

  I turned my attention to the navigation officers now. Both of them were blond and quite striking. From Theo’s sight accent, I wondered if they were from Denmark possibly.

  “Good to know,” I said.

  We listened as the captain grabbed a microphone and detailed the emergency procedures to all of the guests. He then showed us what each of the buttons and gadgets were. I noticed a panel along one wall with many red and green flashing lights.

  “What is that?”

  “It’s our mainframe computer. The ship is run by it unless we get near to port and then I take over and steer the ship in.”

  Eleanor and I excused ourselves after the captain went into specifics about the ship that made me yawn. I didn’t need all of those details to enjoy the trip. I’d much rather catch up with Andrew and Mr. Wilson.

  Chapter Three

  I called Andrew several times before he answered and he told us that he’d meet us in the atrium, where the crew would be doing the welcome aboard announcement. Eleanor and I wanted to go back to our rooms to use the bathroom before we met our husbands. It was hard not to hear the music that rocketed through the ship.

  “Wow, that sure is loud,” Eleanor said.

  “I’d have to agree with you there,” I said, as we came off the elevator and into the corridor that led to our rooms.

  We hadn’t walked all that far when we heard what sounded like something, or someone, hitting the wall at the end of the corridor. By the time we made it to where we heard the sound, there on the floor was a woman with a white towel around her neck. Part of the towel was formed like it was one of the ones that were left on the beds in the shape of a swan.

  “Check that door, Eleanor,” I said, as I knelt and checked the woman’s pulse.

  Eleanor opened the exit door and glanced down the stairs, coming back to me and dragging me off toward her room. She jingled the key in the lock and we were barely inside when we heard footsteps in the hallway.

  “Great, I was hoping nobody would be up here,” a man with a deep voice said.

  “Hurry up, then, and be quick about it. The last thing we need is for someone to come up here and interrupt us,” a man said.

  “I’m going as fast as I can,” came the man’s response.

  “Interrupting them doing what?” whispered Eleanor.

  I gave her a look instead, as I could hear someone walking past the door. We waited until we could no longer hear the men in the hallway and then
called downstairs, asking for help, and said that we had found the body of a woman.

  Tears burned the back of my lids and I felt helpless until someone knocked on the door, alerting us that they were security. I opened the door and we moved into the hallway. Even though my eyesight wasn’t the best, I could see that there was no longer a body on the floor.

  Eleanor made her way down the hallway with security, and the captain showed up next, in what was now a crowded hallway with ten more security personnel. “What happened?” he asked us.

  “We thought … we heard—”

  “What my friend is trying to say,” Eleanor began, “is that we found a body of a young woman with one of those swan towels wrapped around her neck.”

  “Then where is this body, now?” Captain Hamilton asked.

  “I don’t know, but it was there, I swear,” I said. “I even checked her pulse and I didn’t feel one.”

  “So what did you do then?”

  “I checked the stairwell and could have sworn that I heard someone on the stairs,” Eleanor said. “Whoever it was had to be coming up after us. That’s why I came back in here and Agnes and I barely got into my room before we heard the voices of two men in the hallway.”

  “They were looking for us. And one of the men told the other to hurry. That must have been when they removed the body,” I observed.

  “So you never actually saw anyone on the stairs for sure?” Hamilton asked.

  “No, but it’s obvious they were after us since we did hear the sound of two men’s voices immediately after we closed the door to my room,” Eleanor said.

  The security personnel gave the captain an amused look.

  “We take false reports seriously,” the captain said.

  “But it’s not false,” I insisted.

  “Then where is the body, or the towel?”

  “How would I know? But we both saw the same thing. Perhaps you should check the cameras before you call us out for being liars.”

  “We’ll check the surveillance tapes, but until then, stay quiet about this incident.”

  “Don’t you want to know what the victim looked like?”

  “Go ahead,” Hamilton said.

  “The woman was young and brunette,” I said.

  “But we didn’t recognize her,” Eleanor added.

  “How would you, when this is a cruise loaded with passengers that you shouldn’t be able to recognize unless you knew them from the mainland?”

  “Well, you have a point, but it’s not anyone we know personally, is what I meant to say.”

  Captain Hamilton just shook his head at us.

  “No need to look at us like that, captain. We’re not lying and you’ll find out when you look at those tapes,” I insisted.

  He didn’t respond and we agreed that we’d keep what we’d found to ourselves until he had the time to investigate the matter. I could tell by the way his eyes narrowed that he didn’t believe a word of what we said.

  After security and the captain left, we took a quick pit stop in my room to use the facilities. I sank onto my bed. “I can’t believe this is happening. Death follows us no matter where we go.” I sighed.

  “Now, that’s not fair, Agnes. How were we to know that a passenger would be murdered here on this ship?”

  “But nobody but us believes that anyone was murdered.”

  “Good point, but we’ll have to just investigate the matter ourselves. I wish I knew who the woman was.”

  “At this point there is no way to know. Of course if we poke around, we might just find out if someone is missing,” I suggested.

  “That won’t be easy on a ship this large.”

  “We better meet the men in the atrium before they think we’re missing in action.”

  I hauled myself off the bed and we left the room, making way for the elevator. Once we were on the lower level, I admired the elegant staircase that went up from two different sides, meeting at the top beneath an incandescent crystal chandelier that was centered over the marble floor below.

  We moved past the staircase and into the atrium. The sound was deafening to me. We elbowed our way in and I couldn’t see Andrew or Wilson anywhere, little alone a wedding party.

  “Welcome aboard,” said a man with a goatee, as he rocked to the dance club sound from a platform above dance floor.

  This so wasn’t my type of music and being in a packed crowd left much to be desired. I didn’t have to say anything to Eleanor because she pulled me back out the door. She placed a finger into each of her ears.

  “I think my ears are going to ring for a week,” Eleanor said.

  “You got that right,” Mr. Wilson said from behind us on his scooter.

  “Besides, they wouldn’t let Wilson in there with that mechanical chair.”

  “It’s discrimination, that is what it is,” Wilson said.

  “Of course it might have something to do with you running over some of the passengers’ toes,” Andrew said. “And would you believe the luck, it was the same couple from earlier.”

  “Not sure I’d call it luck,” I said with a smile.

  “How did it go when you visited the bridge?”

  “Oh, you know, too complex for the most part. Eleanor nearly set off the alarm to evacuate the ship, though.”

  “We were planning to have dinner with the captain tomorrow,” Eleanor said. “But we’re not so sure now.”

  Andrew cocked a brow. “Oh, and why is that?”

  I fidgeted as I asked, “Why would you ask me that?”

  “I just thought there was a story behind it, that is all. Why did it take you girls so long to meet up with us here?”

  “You’re just full of questions, aren’t you?”

  Andrew gave me one of his, ‘I know you’ve been up to no good’ looks, and for the moment, I didn’t want to tell him about the body we had found that turned up missing. “No. It’s just that we bumped into Martha and she told us you two bailed earlier than the rest of them.”

  “A few ladies in the group didn’t care to have us along, anyway.”

  “Still, that doesn’t explain the lapse of time you’ve been gone.”

  “Are you sure you’re not a cop, Andrew? You’re certainly acting like one now.”

  “What can I say. I guess I know you too well, now. I can tell from the look on your face that you’re hiding something. What is it?”

  “Would you leave your wife alone? There’s no sense in asking her. You’ll find out eventually,” Wilson said.

  “That’s what I’m worried about, the eventually. I’d rather know now what I’m up against.”

  “There’s nothing going on,” Eleanor said. “What are we going to do now, stand here all day talking about nothing, or should we find something else to do?”

  “We could all take a nap,” Wilson suggested. “I, for one, could use some sleep.”

  We all agreed and went upstairs. I winked at Eleanor, which meant I’d meet her in the hallway once the men went to sleep. It took longer until I knew Andrew was truly asleep before I tiptoed out of the room. Eleanor was in the hall, glancing at her watch when I appeared.

  I waited to speak until we were halfway to the elevator, but Eleanor spoke first, saying, “It took you long enough.”

  “I know, and it took so long for him to go to sleep. I hate lying to him about that body we found.”

  “Are you sure that’s how you want to handle that? It’s a pretty big secret to keep from Andrew.”

  I knew she was right, but how could I tell him that once again we had planned to launch an investigation? “You know how he hates us investigating, and since the body disappeared, we can’t say for certain that a crime has been committed.”

  “Yes, but we both know that we saw the body at the same time.”

  “I know, but we promised the captain to keep it under wraps, remember?”

  “Yes, but how long do you expect to keep this a secret from Andrew? It’s no way to begin a marriage.”


  Eleanor was lucky that Mr. Wilson didn’t care if she ever kept anything from him when it came to crimes or our investigations. My Andrew was quite another matter. “I know, but right now we don’t know what really happened to that body. If I hadn’t seen it with my own two eyes, I’d have thought I imagined it.”

  “We’ve already established that, but what now?”

  “Do you think that’s standard policy to tell us not to tell any of the passengers what we saw?”

  “Yes, especially when they don’t believe a word we said.”

  “He’ll change his tune when he gets the chance to look over the camera tapes. As you can tell, all the corridors have them.”

  “The tapes will also include our goings-on, if we plan to investigate.”

  We hustled into the elevator as a young couple staggered their way out. They had obviously been doing some celebrating already. I pushed the button and went back down to the fourth deck this time, since that’s where Martha was staying. “Perhaps Martha might be able to be our third pair of eyes and ears.”

  “You want Martha to help on our investigation?”

  “Yes, why not?”

  Eleanor gasped. “Because in the past, she hardly stayed on task. The first time she sees some young man she has a fancy for, she’ll be long gone.”

  “Oh, I know that, dear. What I meant was, she could report back to us if she happened to overhear someone talking about a missing friend or wife. People just can’t disappear in a puff of smoke on a cruise ship, you know.”

  “I know, but—”

  “But what?” Eleanor asked, with hands on her ample hips now. “I’m sure many passengers look at a cruise as one big party.”

  “Fine, you’ll see just how wrong you are.”

  “You mean you plan to prove me wrong, right?”

  I suppressed a sigh, not wanting to let her know she hit that nail squarely on the head. When the elevator came to a stop, we strolled out and I wished we were wearing hats, since the sun was so bright, especially for Eleanor’s fair skin.

  “Perhaps we should go to a shop and buy a hat,” I suggested. “I’d hate for you to get a nasty burn.”

  “I’ll be fine. Don’t you have sunscreen in that purse of yours?”