Kara's View of Autumn

by Carl Hamlin

  The office was quieter than normal that morning. Many of the probation officers were in court or out on visits. Kara peered through the window that comprised the top half of her office door. Two staffers sat at their desks as their probationers sat across from their desks and went through their routine check-ins.

  Kara went to the break room one floor below and got a cup of coffee from a vending machine, then went into her office and closed the door. She looked out the window before sitting down, taking another glance at what was left of the colorful sunrise she had enjoyed during her morning run. She would much have preferred to be outside again amongst the myriad colors she so loved.

  She sat at her desk and faced the tall stack of files to be reviewed. She needed to be current on what was happening in the cases, so that she could, in turn, keep McKormack informed. He asked little of Kara except to not be taken by avoidable surprise by some dramatic turn of events involving one of the several hundred lawbreakers the office was charged with monitoring. In spite of their best collective efforts, surprises did occur, as the lives represented by the stack of case files were unpredictable by nature.

  Two of the probation officers who reported to Kara were women, so they were also assigned to a mainly female caseload. When Kara reviewed those cases, she often cringed at the realization that many of those women had teenage experiences not unlike her own. At least half those cases had been young, unwed mothers. That seemed to have rendered them vulnerable to all forms of exploitation or outright abuse. When going through such files, Kara often closed her eyes and thanked God that her parents had reacted the way they had.

  Kara was a generation older than some of those women. When she was a teen, pregnancies were usually followed by a marriage, even if it were of questionable prognosis. It was a different time and place in her hometown thirty miles from Blanton.

  She had often wondered, absent the intervention of her parents, would she have ever finished high school? Would she have been a good mother, or would Susan have ended up in foster care or an adopted home?

  Each time she sat down at her desk, and each time that generous paycheck was deposited in her bank account, she shuddered to some degree at thinking of what might have been, what was for most young women in that situation. As much as she wished she could retire sooner, she knew that she needed to be grateful for the good fortune of her reality. Each time her age started to bother her, she reminded herself how it would feel if she had spent all those decades in struggle and sadness, with nothing else than more of the same to look forward to as she closed in on the last chapters of her book of life.

  She picked up another case to review, and then suddenly set the file down. She began to think of the awkward proposal from Roger, and could not explain to herself why she would not want to fill her remaining decades with him by her side, day and night.

  She was so lost in thought that she jumped when her desk phone buzzed. “Kara Wulling.”

  “I know. Thought I’d call on your business phone just to throw you off guard.”

  “Hey, lover……just thinking about you.”

  “Mutual, of course…..I don’t know where to begin.”

  Kara leaned back in her chair. “Well, let me begin. I love you, too. Yes, that was a quite a paddling you gave me, and no, I don’t hate you. And yes… that was some great mattress action later on.”

  “Well…….”.

  Kara lowered her voice, although her door was closed. “I still can’t believe you paddled me so hard. Ouch!”

  “I know you understand why I did that.”

  Kara sighed. “Yes…..I do. And I love that about you. But you really whacked me good and hard.”

  “Kara……?”

  “Yes?”

  “I’ll do it again if I think it will make you look out for your safety.”

  Kara felt her face flushing. “I suppose you will.”

  “And….Kara?”

  “Yes, lover.”

  “The next time, I won’t stop so soon.”

  Kara had a mischievous smirk that Roger could not see. “I see. Just how many whacks would I get?”

  She heard a deep sigh. “Kara……”.

  She glanced up and saw one of her employees approaching her door. “Oops…..have to go. Bye lover.”

  She placed the phone back on the receiver and smiled, then motioned for the employee to come in.

  Chapter 5

  Kara sat at her desk eating a sandwich and a bag of chips from a machine that stood in the dingy break room shared by several agencies in the old building. She had forgotten to stop at the delicatessen on the way to work to get her usual salad, and she was too hungry to wait until after work to eat.

  Just as she was finishing her lunch, her phone buzzed. “Kara Wulling.”

  “Kara……Tom Swinson…….” Tom Swinson was the Sherriff, and a friend. “We picked up the trail on Harlow again, and he was seen driving up and down your street about a half-hour ago.”

  Kara felt her hands tremble on the phone. “Okay…..thanks. What’s he driving?”

  “It’s a blue Camaro….an old one, but I’m sure it’s capable of a lot of speed. You sure can’t outrun him in that Cooper.”

  “Okay….I appreciate the heads-up.”

  “Kara……..please…..this time……I want to have your neighborhood covered.”

  “Okay.”

  “Really?” Swinson was used to hearing a refusal.

  Kara nearly laughed in spite of the danger she felt, as she thought of Roger’s manner of persuasion, the results of which she was still sitting on. “Really, Tom. Thanks very much.”

  “Good. Because he was seen slowing down when he came to your place.”

  “Tom……really. I’m taking this situation seriously.”

  “Good to hear…..at last. So we’ll have someone around just about all the time you’re at home, in the event he would slip out of out sight. Call in if you go to leave home after hours. And most of all, call in when you go home and leave for the office in the morning. We’ll use unmarked cars when we’re following you.”

  “Will do, Tom, and thanks again.”

  The idea of following that direction grated on her, but she did not wish to disappoint Roger. The idea of once again finding herself across his knees was a distant and secondary concern.

  The afternoon wore on and the stack of files was less than two inches thick. Numerous phone calls had slowed her down, and she decided she would finish them the next day.

  She closed her eyes and shook her head, then reluctantly punched in the number for the Sherriff’s office. She was put through to the shift supervisor, and told him that she was going to be heading home.

  She put on her jacket, went down the stairs to the ground level, and exchanged wisecracks with the security guard stationed in the lobby. She walked outside into the brisk fall air, and began to look around as she strolled to the adjacent parking lot. The sun was still bright, and she would be driving into its glare, she once she was in the car, she donned her sunglasses.

  She started the car, and then mentally reviewed the contents of her refrigerator and cupboards. She would not have to stop anywhere in the way home, and did not relish having to call the Sherriff’s office that she was making a trip to the store. She began to feel a twinge of irritation with the conditions she had agreed to. Still, she decided to override her typical impulse and cooperate.

  As she entered the traffic flow of the busy street in the heart of downtown Blanton, she was indeed struggling with the sun’s radiant glare. She pulled the sunshade down, and that made it easier for her to be able to glance in the rearview mirror.

  Just as she was beginning to turn onto the street that fed into her neighborhood, she saw a blue Camaro sitting along the side of the street. In the mirror, she watched as it pulled away from the curb and began to follow her. She reached for the holster snap, removed the .38, and sat it on the seat next to her. While watching the Camaro follow her, she could also see that a
large grey Dodge sedan was in turn following the Camaro, and she knew it was the unmarked car she had been promised.

  She turned on the police radio and listened as her protectors called back and forth. She had to admit that this was a comforting arrangement, although she still felt that she could handle any moves Harlow attempted. She could not know if he was aware of her knowledge of the type of car he was driving.

  She was now just four blocks from her street, and the Camaro and Dodge were still in the caravan, with a handful of other vehicles interspersed. She listened as the deputy in the unmarked car called for another deputy in a cruiser to join in, as Harlow was showing no sign of breaking off. Feeling that Harlow’s intent was serious, Kara began to feel tense. She was also wondering, for the first time, what she could have been thinking, to want to turn down the protection.

  She made the turn, and watched as the black and white cruiser began to retail behind. That was when she saw Harlow make the turn, but as she did so, his front left wheel crossed the centerline.

  That was all that was required for the deputy in the cruiser to flip on his flashing lights. He passed the other cars between them, and drove up next to the Camaro and motioned for Harlow to pull over.

  Kara drove the rest of the way home feeling a bit rattled, but at the same time knowing that Harlow was otherwise occupied. She parked in her garage, went into the brownstone, and poured herself a drink.

  Although she was safe in her home, she kept the .38 on her belt for another hour. She finally convinced herself that she was being uncharacteristically silly, and finally went to the bedroom and put it in her drawer.

  She opened the top freezer of her refrigerator and took out a container of stew she had prepared for convenience on such an evening. She placed the container in the microwave oven, and as soon as she turned it on, her cell phone chimed.

  “Kara…..Bill Germain, here.” He was the detective driving the unmarked car. “Harlow got cited for crossing into the other lane. He has no remaining doubts now that he’s being watched.”

  “Thanks, Bill. I owe you guys one.”

  “This will go on for a while. We want to make it clear to the asshole that he will be the first suspect if you get as much as a splinter in your finger. Call in the morning when you get ready to leave.”

  “Remember……I jog. And that’s non-negotiable.”

  “Then call when you hit the sidewalk. I’ll follow you.”

  “That’s fine. And since you’ll be following me, I’ll wear something tight as I run.”

  “Hey……..thanks. That’ll be hot!”

  “Bye, bye, Bill.”

  Kara laughed as she broke off the call with the detective she had known for twenty years. His wife Sally was one of the few people she would join with a for a card party or to go bowling.

  She turned on the television and began watching the sports channel as she enjoyed the stew as she sat at a television tray. Just as she finished the last spoonful, Roger called.

  “Hey, Lover. Don’t tell me you’ve been listening in on our radio transmissions.”

  Roger sighed loudly. “No, but someone else in the office was. I got a call. You okay?”

  “I’m well taken care of. I had lots of escorts on the way home.”

  “You’re not going to go running in the morning, are you?”

  “Of course I am. But it’s going to be okay. Germain’s going to be following me and watching my cheeks bounce up and down.”

  Roger chuckled. “You are a special case.”

  “I sure am, my lover. We on for the weekend?”

  “Can’t wait. Any special suggestions for what to do?”

  “Well……I want my toes to curl at least once.”

  “Uh…..that reminds me. I went to the doctor today.”

  “Are you okay?”

  “Yeah. I just got a prescription…..you know…..just to be sure. My age and all.”

  Kara began to giggle. “I swear…..I’ve never noticed a problem. No complaints from me.”

  “It may make encore performances a lot easier. Let’s not take any chances. And speaking of taking chances, it makes me happy that you’re taking the added security.”

  “Don’t tell me you’re going to claim it’s because you tanned my hide.”

  “You brought that up…..I didn’t.”

  “But, you were thinking that, right?”

  “Well……yes, I am. Can you definitely say I’m wrong?”

  Kara hesitated, and then finally spoke softly. “No…..not really.”

  “So….what have we learned from all of this?”

  Kara laughed. “I’ve learned to lie to you about what I’m doing, unless I want to get my fanny paddled until it’s red.”

  Kara heard a moan. “Kara…..if I have to do that again, you won’t be able to sit down for hours.”

  “You’re being such a bully. But I still love you.”

  “I only make that threat because I want you to be safe. You know that.”

  “Yes….I understand completely.”

  “And are you okay with that? Because I mean every word of it.”

  Although Roger could not see, she rolled her eyes and looked at the ceiling. “I understand. I feel too confused about it all to really know if I’m okay with it. But, I ‘m willing to accept that. So….maybe you’re right. I guess the threat of it just might keep me in line after all. So……”. She looked down and buried her face in her hand as she spoke. “If I go out on a limb again……..you can really let me have it. I will willingly place my poor, bare fanny across your knees.”

  Roger gave an audible sigh of relief. “Please……just be careful. Kara……you’re precious to me. You don’t have to ever prove yourself or your courage to anyone, ever again. I want you around for a long time. And I know Susan and Michael need you. Just stay safe.”

  At the mention of her daughter and grandson, Kara began to tear up. “Okay….good night, Spanky.”

  Roger managed to laugh. “I love you. Night.”

  Kara closed her phone, and then began to cry harder as she thought of the last time she had been with her family. She had seen Susan and Michael just two weeks ago, but the span of time now felt like years.

  As she tried to understand why she would be so reckless in the face of peril, when she had so much to live for, she broke into hard, wracking sobs. She buried her face in her hands as she felt as if she were falling apart.

  Her lifetime of memories and trials crashed around her. Her journey from unwed teen mother to a position of such responsibility and compensation had been more difficult than she would ever allow herself to confess to others.

  She felt a sudden and overwhelming sensation of exhaustion. She realized that she had always seen herself as having to compensate for her difficult beginning. She had to not only be the equal of those around her; she had to prove herself their superior. She had to prove that she was more daring, more courageous and more willing to sacrifice her safety.

  That was the vexing back-and-forth struggle she had suppressed for most of her lifetime, shoving it back below the surface of her consciousness through her work her classes and her devotion to Susan. However, something about Roger made that old game more difficult to play. There was something about Roger that called each and every one of her bluffs.

  The next morning at 5:15, Kara called Bill Germain’s cell phone and told him that she was ready to begin her run. He promised that she would be cruising her street within ten minutes. She took another drink of coffee and put on her sweatshirt, her sock hat and gloves.

  She placed the Smith and Wesson in her waist pack, and then did a few more stretching exercises before going outside and locking her door behind her. She peered down the street and saw a familiar dark blue sedan, so she ran down the steps and onto the sidewalk.

  As promised, she had dressed in her most snug and stretchy running pants. As Germain’s car crept slowly up the street, she waved, and as he approached closer, she began to wiggle
her backside in an exaggerated fashion. She also began to put more up and down motion in her run for a while, laughing to herself all the way down the street. Germain and his wife were innocent friends, but as she ran, she was certain that the view was having a special, stirring effect on him.

  As she ran, Germain would back off and insure that the escort was close enough to insure her safety, yet loose enough as to allow for the possibility that Harlow or someone on his behalf could move in and still be apprehended. Kara had received enough training and was experienced enough that she understood fully what tactics were being employed.

  The jog proved to be free of any incidents, and as she finished and was within a hundred yards of her home, she waved to Germain as he pulled away from the curb down the street, but he cruised past slowly and watched until she was safely inside.

  Inside, she went through the routine with her alarm, then showered and got ready for what she hoped would be a quiet Wednesday. As she headed for downtown Blanton, she recalled that she had two performance interviews scheduled for the afternoon, and would be examining more case files in the morning.

  Upon her arrival, she checked the web site that tracked the fall tree coloration, and she saw that it was hitting its peak in the hilly area an hour away that she so enjoyed in autumn. Next, she checked the weather forecast, and saw that the following day was predicted to be much warmer with partly cloudy skies.

  She saw that McKormack was already at his desk and walked in. “Okay for me to use a vacation day tomorrow?”

  The large man looked up with a smile. “Leaves in color?”

  “And the weather looks right.”

  “Okay. Have at it. You want a tail?”

  “No, thanks. I’ve been told the one I already have is nothing but superb.”

  The boss refused to look up. “I can’t come up with a legally acceptable comment. Have fun.”

  With a hearty laugh, Kara walked back to her office and logged on to her e-mail. Roger had messaged her to say that Germain had texted him, to say that he had watched Kara’s morning run from behind, and that Roger was one lucky man.