Cowgirl, Say Yes

by Brenda Mott

  “I can’t.” Tess shook her head. She didn’t know how to stop giving. And she really didn’t have a clue about how to truly let Wade into her life. Even though she realized now that she loved him. For so long, her family and her animals had been her world. Neat and orderly, as much in control as she could make things be. She’d filled every inch of her life, her time, with those things.

  Now, suddenly, she felt as though her world was spinning out of control. All order, all routine, gone forever. Again she wondered how she could possibly live without her mom in her life. Knowing what an empty space Rae’s absence would leave had her shuddering.

  “You can,” Lloyd insisted. “And you will.” Pride filled his voice, coupled with a protectiveness that was no stranger to Tess. “I’ll stay here with your mother. I married her for better or worse, till death do us part. And I meant it.”

  Still, Tess hesitated. “I hate to leave you here by yourself.”

  “I’m not by myself,” Lloyd said. A sad smile tugged at the corner of his lips. “Your mother’s here—you can bet on that. Her body might be a shell, but her spirit is here with me. She’s my partner, Tess. We’ll lean on each other.”

  Tess hugged her father close, drawing on his strength. Willing him to draw on hers. Then she bent over and placed a kiss on Rae’s forehead. “I love you, Mama. I hope you can hear me. Please find some peace.” Tears squeezed from her eyes as she gently hugged her mother’s frail body, then turned and left the room.

  WADE LEFT the hospital and went straight home. He’d wanted to ask Tess to let him stay, but he knew she needed some space, some time alone with her family. And besides, he had work to do. Something so important it couldn’t be put off for one more minute.

  He’d done a lot of contemplating lately, and he’d come to a conclusion. Deidra had been older than him, and he’d admired her maturity and steady way of thinking. Her strong family values and beliefs were a large part of what had attracted him to her in the first place. And their difference in age was the reason he’d initially thought Tess young and foolish. As well, he’d believed he’d already lost the one woman in life who could ever truly be his partner. For a long while, that belief had caused him to deny that his feelings for Tess ran far deeper than he wanted to admit. Deeper than he’d ever thought possible.

  But slowly, he began to realize something. When he’d married Deidra, it had been because he’d confused love with friendship. He’d been so determined to avoid the sparks that had inflamed his parents’ marriage—negative sparks—that he’d reached out to the one woman with whom he had everything in common. The one woman he could feel comfortably safe dealing with, who thought like him and acted like him and agreed with him on pretty much every issue. He and Deidra had not been the two halves of a whole as he’d once believed. Instead, they’d been two separate wholes.

  He’d loved her, and shared his life with her, but what they had did not begin to compare with what he had with Tess. She was his other half. The one missing from his life for longer than he cared to acknowledge. Never had he loved a woman the way he loved her. Tess, with her wild and crazy ideas, and her fiery nature that made every moment fun and unpredictable. Tess, who’d do anything for those she loved. He’d never known he could feel so close to someone, in spite of their differences. Somehow, those differences no longer seemed to matter. He and Tess had enough in common to make life all it should be. And more.

  To see things for what they were had taken him a while, but now that he had, he wasn’t about to let her get away from him.

  With that thought in mind, Wade saddled his horse. Minutes later, Macy and Jason mounted their horses and joined him in the task at hand. One they’d performed together many times. But now they weren’t simply driving cattle from one pasture to another, or moving them to holding pens for the chore of branding calves.

  This move was a permanent one. One that would change his life forever.

  “All set?” Wade called.

  “Ready, Dad,” Macy shouted.

  “Head ’em out,” Jason hollered. He let out a cowboy whoop and began to drive the cattle from the pasture, down the road.

  Wade rode at the front of the herd, sitting tall and happy in the saddle. Smokey and Bandit traveled somewhere in the middle, keeping the cattle in line.

  Heading for Tess’s ranch.

  CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

  TESS THOUGHT she was dreaming. She’d come home from the hospital and cried herself into an exhausted sleep. Her father’s words had stayed with her, whirling in her mind.

  Go to Wade. He’s crazy about you.

  And now, as she awakened to the sound of her dogs barking, Tess made her way to the front door and stepped out onto the porch. Certain Wade was just plain crazy.

  Cattle milled about her yard, dozens and dozens of them. Herefords, Charolais…bawling cows and half-grown calves. Frowning, Tess shook the sleep from her mind, standing there in her stocking feet.

  “Wade, what on earth are you doing?” She moved to the edge of the porch, watching the cattle form a cluster in her yard and driveway.

  Wade rode over on his blue roan and halted at the foot of the steps, looking so good she wanted to pull him from the saddle and wrap him in her arms. “I’m giving up ranching,” he said. He gestured over his shoulder toward Macy and Jason, who waved from the backs of their horses as they worked to keep the cattle under control with the help of Smokey and Bandit.

  Tess’s own dogs slipped into the fray, Duke’s challenging bark echoing above the din of the cattle, along with Bruiser’s frantic yips. Sasha whined and darted in and out among the herd, eager to help, her cow dog instincts incited.

  Tess shook her head again. Surely she was still asleep. “I don’t understand.”

  “Then let me spell it out for you.” Wade leaned on his saddle horn, his face serious. “I’ve been debating for quite some time now whether or not to sell all of my herd. Working the Circle D has taken a lot of effort, more than I have to give. I can’t keep up with it and still be the best parent possible to Macy and Jason. That’s why I started Cowboy Up.”

  Tess stared at him, unable to connect what he was saying with the chaos in front of her. “And you’ve brought your cows to me because…?”

  “I didn’t bring them to you. I’m just stopping by on my way to Jed Sanders’s place.” Jed owned a ranch a few miles down the road. Tess knew him as a regular customer of the feed store.

  “Why?”

  “Because I want you to see firsthand how serious I am, Tess. Jed made me an offer a while back on my herd, and I’m taking him up on it.” He swung down from his horse and tethered Dakota’s reins to the porch rail before climbing the steps. “I’m not just doing this for the kids. I’m doing it for you…for us.”

  “Me?” Tess felt like a sleep-deprived zombie, her brain refusing to kick into gear. He was making no sense. Surely he wasn’t selling his cattle because she disapproved of raising meat animals. That would be a big step for him. One he’d only be likely to take if…

  Her mind began to clear, and her heart raced as she realized exactly what he meant. “Wade, you can’t do that.”

  “Oh, yes, I can.” He pulled her into his arms. “I can’t raise cattle and ask you to be a part of my life while I do it. And I can’t spend enough quality time with my kids and be a rancher, either. Sure, I’m taking a gamble on Cowboy Up. It’s doing great so far, though I realize that could change.” He shrugged. “If it does, well, I’ll worry about that when it happens. I’ll find another way to provide for my family if I have to.”

  Stunned, Tess could only stare at him. “Wade, I never expected you to change your lifestyle to please me. I may not like the idea of raising meat animals, but at the same time, if that’s what you want to do, it’s your business.”

  He held her away. “You’re not listening. I don’t want to raise cattle anymore. Like I said, that’s what I stopped by to tell you.” He headed for Dakota and untied the horse’s reins. “I’ll be
back as soon as I’ve moved these cows.” He pointed one finger at her and gave her a wink. “We’ve got a lot to talk about, cowgirl. Will you still be here, or should I meet you at the feed store or the hospital? I’d like to come see your mom again.”

  Sudden sorrow washed over Tess.

  But she remembered what her dad had said to her.

  “I’ll be right here,” she said.

  “Then I’ll see you later.” Gathering Dakota’s reins, Wade swung into the saddle, and then he rode away.

  Tess watched him for a long minute, emotions warring inside her.

  Wade had just proven to her his willingness to compromise when it came to their relationship and to her feelings. That he’d thought about giving up ranching before, because of the kids, didn’t matter. It was no secret that he’d planned to keep a few beef around for family use. Macy had recently told her as much.

  But Tess would safely bet the cattle that had just trampled her yard accounted for every single head on the Circle D. Which told her everything she needed to know. Wade was doing this in large part for her.

  Still, she couldn’t let Wade into her life if he was the only one giving. A relationship required compromise. It had to be a two-way street.

  Hesitating no longer, Tess ducked inside the house to slip into her boots and cowboy hat, then strode toward the pasture. As she haltered Angel, she thought about the way life truly was a cycle. One full of good and bad, the precious moments so fleeting. Nothing lasted forever. Her father was right, and Tess was determined to enjoy the blessings she’d been given. She saddled Angel and swung onto the mare’s back.

  Heading down the road at a lope, in the wake of the disappearing herd of cattle, she couldn’t wait to catch up with Wade.

  WADE DIDN’T HEAR the approach of Tess’s horse over the bawling of the cattle and the noise of their hooves on the blacktopped road. So when he caught sight of her from the corner of his eye, he thought his mind was playing tricks on him.

  She rode toward him on her paint mare. The one she called Angel, looking like an angel herself.

  He called out to her as she drew near. “Tess, what on earth are you doing?”

  “I’ve come to help you,” she said, as though it were a given.

  Frowning, Wade looked at her. “Why would you do that? I thought all this went against your principles.” He gestured in a sweeping motion to the herd of cattle as they moved along the road.

  She quirked her mouth. “I guess if you can compromise, then I need to make an effort, too. Not that I’d abandon my beliefs for one minute. But these cattle aren’t being driven to slaughter, right?”

  “No. Jed will use them for breeding stock. Of course, he’ll likely sell most of the calves.”

  “Still,” Tess said, “we’re not driving them to market. We’re simply moving them to a new home.”

  He felt his mouth twitch. “I’d say that’s treading a fine line. But, yeah, I suppose you could look at it that way.”

  “Give me a break, cattleman.” She grinned at him. “You’re doing this partly for me, so I figure I need to do something for you, as well.”

  “Yeah?”

  “Yep. I meant what I said before. That if you wanted to stay in the cattle business, I’d respect your decision. But if you’re serious about selling out, then I want to ride with you. Besides, the quicker you get these cattle delivered, the sooner we can talk. I have a lot to say to you.”

  His heart hammered. Surely what Tess had to say was something good. Why else would she be here, riding beside him?

  Hope surged through him.

  He had something to say to her, too—or rather, something to ask her.

  Wade rode along, keeping the cattle in line. Hoping with all his heart and soul that she’d say yes.

  TESS AGREED TO MEET Wade back at her place. It would give him time to ride home with Macy and Jason and take care of their horses while she brushed and unsaddled Angel.

  A short while later, after turning Angel out in the pasture, she made her way inside the house. Tess headed for the shower and washed the trail dust from her body. She shampooed her hair twice and blow-dried it, letting it hang long and loose, the way Wade liked it.

  Anticipation filled her as she dressed in clean jeans and a T-shirt, then went outside to wait on the porch.

  “I thought you’d never come outside.” Wade’s voice startled her as he spoke from the bottom of the stairs where he’d sat just out of view, scratching Duke behind the ears.

  Without time to ponder the reason her dog had suddenly accepted his presence, Tess smiled and started down the stairs. “Eager to see me, huh?”

  “Oh, yeah.” Wade rose and made his way up the steps toward her. They met in the middle, and he took her into his arms. He’d obviously showered, too. The familiar scent of his cologne…the one she loved so much…drifted around her.

  “You smell fantastic,” she said. “And you look even better.”

  “You look pretty good yourself,” he said, holding her at arm’s length. Then he brushed a kiss across her lips. “I’ve dreamed of this day.”

  “That makes two of us.” Excitement filled her. Then she smiled and gave him a mock frown. “But I don’t know. Do you think it’s possible for a vegetarian and a cattle rancher to coexist?”

  “A former cattle rancher,” he reminded her. “You know, I realized something while I was driving over here. I’ve got an awful lot of acreage at the Circle D that’s going to go to waste now that the cows are gone.” He gave a casual shrug. “Of course, it might make a nice place for a horse sanctuary.”

  Happiness filled Tess. “You’re serious?” He was. The look on his face was enough to tell her so.

  “You bet I am. Now, I’m not saying I’m going to become a vegetarian, and I don’t know about having cats in the house. But I’ve got a nice warm barn, and I can cook my own meals. I can even cook for you, if you’ll teach me how to fix carrot-pineapple-guava punch, and noodles with green things in ’em.”

  Tess laughed. “Oh, Wade. Do you know how scared I’ve been of making a commitment to you?”

  “No more so than I’ve been,” he said, growing serious. “But I’ve come to realize something, Tess. I love you with all my heart and soul. It’s not just Macy and Jason who need someone besides me in their life. They want a mom, yes, and it took me a while to get that through my thick head. But what took an even longer time for me to see was that I need someone in my life, as well. And that someone is you, Tess.”

  “I love you, too, Wade,” Tess said, feeling as if her heart might burst. “But I’ve been taking care of my mom for so long now, and my animals, that I thought those things were enough. I thought they were all I needed. Then my dad made me realize that it’s not enough. I want someone to share my life with, and my hopes and dreams. I want you.”

  “Then say you’ll marry me.” Wade cradled her face in his hands. “Tell me you’ll be a part of my life for as long as forever is.”

  A gust of wind blew across the porch, setting the rocking chair in motion. And in its wake, Tess could have sworn she heard a woman’s laughter. A soft, familiar sound…

  “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

  He kissed her, long and sweet. When he pulled back, the love she saw in his eyes warmed her heart. “Let’s go tell the kids,” he said.

  Smiling, Tess took his hand.

  No longer afraid of the future.

  ISBN: 978-1-4592-3637-0

  COWGIRL, SAY YES

  Copyright © 2003 by Brenda Mott.

  All rights reserved. Except for use in any review, the reproduction or utilization of this work in whole or in part in any form by any electronic, mechanical or other means, now known or hereafter invented, including xerography, photocopying and recording, or in any information storage or retrieval system, is forbidden without the written permission of the publisher, Harlequin Enterprises Limited, 225 Duncan Mill Road, Don Mills, Ontario, Canada M3B 3K9.

  All characters
in this book have no existence outside the imagination of the author and have no relation whatsoever to anyone bearing the same name or names. They are not even distantly inspired by any individual known or unknown to the author, and all incidents are pure invention.

  This edition published by arrangement with Harlequin Books S.A.

  ® and TM are trademarks of the publisher. Trademarks indicated with ® are registered in the United States Patent and Trademark Office, the Canadian Trade Marks Office and in other countries.

  Visit us at www.eHarlequin.com