The Mirror's Gaze

by Rae D. Magdon

  "Very well. As long as everyone promises to stay out of my way."

  Together, our small party made our way back down from the battlements. Ellie and Belle went first, carrying the princess, with the dwellyn escorting them on either side. Rachari and Jett Bahari followed, with solemn looks on their faces. Doran and I went last, taking the stairs together. He didn't speak, but I sensed that he was waiting for me to say something.

  "I can't believe it's over," I murmured, soft enough so the others couldn't hear. "She's dead, and I don't feel anything."

  "What were you expecting to feel, Acha?" Doran asked.

  I hadn't considered that question. "I don't know. Relief? Sadness? Not this numbness." I hung my head. "In the end, I couldn't even do it. I had her, but I let Jethro make the final blow. I was too much of a coward."

  "You are no coward, Ailynn.” He wrapped an arm around my shoulders, squeezing lightly. “Choosing not to kill someone you loved is the furthest thing from cowardice I can imagine. That guilt was not yours to take on. You defeated her. That is enough."

  I breathed in slowly. Hopefully, someday I would be able to believe those words. Until then, I would be grateful. Grateful for Raisa, for my children, and grateful that some of my friends had made it through the night alive. If I had made that possible in some small way, then perhaps I had done enough.

  We arrived back at Cate and Larna's pallets a few minutes later. Raisa looked up as we approached, but she wasn't the only one. To my surprise, Cate sat up on her pallet, in her human form once more. A blanket had been draped over her bare shoulders, and she was gazing down at Larna with tears streaming down her face. It wasn't until I hurried closer that I realized they were tears of relief. Larna's eyes were open, and there was a slight smile on her face.

  "It took you long enough," Cate said, her voice breaking on a sob. "I thought you were never going to wake up."

  Larna gave a soft, hoarse laugh. "Aye, little bird. You may be faster, but I will always be catching you."

  I averted my eyes as the two of them embraced, turning to Raisa instead. "I love you," I told her, stroking loose strands of golden hair that had escaped her braid out of her face.

  Raisa smiled, embracing me and tucking her chin over my shoulder as I rested my hands gently against her stomach. "We love you, too."

  Chapter Ten

  Taken from the diary of Lady Eleanor Kingsclere

  "ELLIE? ELLIE, WAKE UP."

  I lifted my head from the cushion of my folded arms at the sound of my name, blinking the sleep from my eyes. Although I couldn't remember falling asleep, the fact I had done so at one of the kitchen counters did not surprise me. I had lapsed into unconsciousness in several odd places over the past two weeks, mostly because I rarely slept through the night anymore.

  It took me a few moments to focus on the face hovering near mine, but I smiled in recognition when I saw Cate's red curls bobbing about her face. "Cate," I murmured, straightening up and stretching out the cricks in my spine. "I wasn't asleep for too long, was I?"

  "Only about a quarter-hour," Jessith said, "although that wasn't the first time Cate said your name." She was curled up by the palace's kitchen fireplace—a passably acceptable substitute for Baxtresse's, or so she told me. Since its stone walls hadn't been too badly damaged by the dragon’s fire, we had taken shelter in Kalmarin's palace following the end of the war.

  "I wasn't asking you," I told her, fighting back a yawn.

  Cate smiled, shaking her head. "Is Jessith being difficult again?" she asked, folding her arms across her chest.

  "No more than usual." I sighed, losing myself in the bowl of cold stew I had been attempting to eat. "I don't suppose you've come to tell me that Neva's woken up?"

  Cate shook her head. "I'm sorry. Belladonna's sitting with her now, but she hasn't opened her eyes. I'm just glad you're trying to eat without my pestering you, even if it is in the middle of the night."

  I felt a stab of guilt. Although she had been preoccupied with Larna for the past few weeks, Cate had always taken time to make sure I was fed while I sat at Neva's bedside. Belle and I took it in shifts to watch her along with the dwellyn. There was always someone with her, even in the small hours of the morning.

  "How is Larna? Better today?"

  "Well enough to bark orders and assert her dominance," Cate said, in a tone that suggested she was not entirely pleased. "I wish she wouldn't push herself so soon, but she thinks it's necessary. All the wyr who were freed from Umbra's influence need someone to lead them, and she seems determined to make sure that someone is her."

  "I think it should be her. She's a good leader. It gives her a sense of purpose. "I wanted to say more, but decided not to. Cate probably didn’t need to be reminded of her loss.

  "Perhaps, but she's not a very good patient," Cate muttered. "Just ask Ailynn. It's a wonder she hasn't strangled Larna yet."

  I pulled out the chair beside me, urging Cate to sit. "What about you?" I asked, turning toward her so we could speak. "These past few weeks have been…" 'Difficult' did not seem a strong enough adjective, and I struggled for a suitable word. So many had died, and even more had been injured.

  "I know." Grief flashed in Cate’s eyes, an echo of my own. The war had left its mark on both of us. "Sometimes, I still can't believe I killed her. My nightmares are gone, but when I realize that over half of my pack died in those tunnels to make sure Larna and I got through, I'm not sure if it's worth it."

  "It was," I said, reaching out to take her hand. "This wasn't about any one person. Not you, or me, or Neva."

  She closed her eyes for a moment, gathering herself again. "You're right. They followed us willingly, and I suppose I should be grateful Larna didn't die with them. I worry."

  "Of course you do, but she needs you now more than ever." I gave her fingers a brief squeeze before letting them go. "And your new pack is going to need you, too. Maybe helping them will give you a new sense of purpose."

  "Maybe." She rested one elbow against the table, drumming her fingertips over its surface. "At least my kill isn't haunting me. Some moments, when she isn't treating her patients, Ailynn acts more like a ghost than a person."

  I had noticed it, too. Although Raisa was always guaranteed to bring a smile to her face, and Belle had coaxed her into the parts of the royal library that hadn't been destroyed, Ailynn carried a constant shadow with her wherever she went. Mogra's death haunted her, even if she didn't say so.

  "Give her time," I told her. "Losing my mother was difficult, and she didn't turn evil first. That has to make things even more confusing."

  "Oh, that reminds me." Cate reached into the folds of her shirt, withdrawing a crisp sheet of paper. "Raisa asked me to give you this."

  She passed it over, and I unfolded it, my eyes widening. It wasn't a message, but a sketch, done in a delicate but precise hand. Three figures peered back at me, and I recognized them at once: Belle and I were pressed close with our arms around each other, and Neva stood between us, smiling broadly. The likeness was astounding, and I sucked in a shaking, unsteady breath. "How did she do this without a reference?" I asked, unable to conceal the wavering note of emotion in my voice.

  "She's quite talented, isn't she?" Cate said. "I think she hoped it would make you feel better."

  A thick, burning lump formed in my throat, and I had to clear it several times before I could speak again. "I will have to tell her thank you. This is, it's beautiful."

  "Don't think of it as a keepsake," Cate warned with a knowing look. "Think of it as something to hope for. She could wake up. Larna did."

  "I know," I said, although my faint stirring of hope was tempered with doubt. Neva's enchanted sleep still hadn't ended, despite Ailynn's best efforts. "I don't want to leave her," I confessed, hanging my head. "Even though I know Belle and I should go back to Seria."

  "Then don't leave her," Cate said, with a small smirk. "You've always had a habit of taking in strays."

  "She isn't a stray,"
I insisted. "She's a princess."

  "A princess without a family. And I'm sure she could use one, especially right now."

  I nodded, unable to find anything about the statement to argue with.

  ***

  The halls were still and empty when Jessith and I returned to Neva's room. Kalmarin's royal palace was large, but I had learned its layout. I knew the fastest path from the kitchen to the second floor, and it was no trouble for me to find one of the servants' staircases by candlelight. Halfway up, Jessith seemed to lose her energy. She flopped onto her side, gazing at me imploringly, and I bent to scoop her into my arms.

  "At this rate, you're going to get fat again."

  Jessith rested her forepaws on my shoulder, tail lashing up to tickle my nose. "Since you feel the need to comment on my physical appearance, I can always comment on yours. If you don't start eating, you're going to look like a kerak."

  "I just ate," I protested. Food hadn't been one of my priorities lately. There was always so much to do, and with Neva constantly on my mind, I had little appetite.

  "Half a bowl of stew hardly counts. If Belle and Cate didn't force you to visit the kitchens, you would have wasted away by now."

  I decided it was best to ignore her. Experience had taught me that cats could rarely be argued with. I reached the top of the stairs and turned left, pulling Jessith closer to my body to ward off the draft and heading along a wide corridor that led to a series of private rooms. When I reached the door I needed, I opened it softly. Belle had taken to sleeping upright in the chair beside Neva's bed, and if she had dozed off, I didn't want to wake her.

  I found her with her nose buried in a book instead, reading by candlelight. "Welcome back," she murmured, marking her place and setting the volume aside. "Are you feeling any better?"

  I shrugged. "As well as I can feel, I suppose." I set Jessith down on the foot of the bed and perched on the arm of Belle's chair. "What are you reading?"

  "A volume about the names and history of dwellyn swords. The tradition for titling famous blades is much more complicated than I expected."

  "I suppose your sword has earned its name," I said, leaning in closer. "Do you have any ideas?"

  Belle gave me a small smile. "I was considering Starshatter. It sounds appropriately alliterative."

  "Starshatter," I repeated, testing the name. "That would look nice printed in a volume about Amendyr's history, don't you think? 'And then Belladonna lifted Starshatter and drove the blade through the enchanted mirror.'"

  "Don't be ridiculous," Belle snorted.

  "I'm not being ridiculous. You do realize we're heroes again, don't you?"

  She heaved a sigh of resignation, slumping further back in her chair. "I think I preferred it when no one except for Prince Brendan knew we were heroes." Her eyes shifted over to Neva, and I saw the smile drop from her face. "It doesn't feel as satisfying as the books always say, does it?"

  I understood. Neva looked so small swallowed up in the covers, especially with Jessith curled on her chest. "It's been two weeks," I whispered, leaving the chair and walking over to the bed. "I'm starting to wonder if she'll ever wake up."

  "Ailynn says she might," Belle said, but she didn't sound particularly hopeful. "Perhaps it was foolish, but before all this happened, I wished we could take her back to Baxstresse with us. I think she would have…I think she would like it there."

  I reached down, taking one of Neva's hands in mine, still warm to the touch. "I wished for the same thing. She told me she didn't want to stay and become queen of Amendyr, and honestly, she shouldn't have to. She's already done more than enough for her kingdom."

  "It would be a shame to separate her from Jessith," Belle agreed, "but where would we keep that enormous dog of hers?"

  Jessith cracked open one eye, whiskers twitching. "That thing isn't coming with us. I've only just gotten used to Larna. Besides, it wouldn't even fit in the stables."

  "Well then, we'll just have to find space for him inside the manor," I told her. She huffed, but I continued holding Neva's hand, running my thumb over her knuckles. "We do have plenty of space, you know, if you want to come with us when you wake up. You're welcome to stay at Baxstresse for as long as you like." I sat on the edge of the mattress, letting her arm rest in my lap. "But you need to wake up first. You need to open your eyes."

  Of course, Neva didn't respond.

  I swallowed hard. The passing days should have given me time to adjust to this new reality, but my grief still welled up, gathering painfully in my chest. "Please," I whispered, even though I knew she couldn't hear me. "We need you to wake up. We love you."

  Nothing. She continued breathing softly, but her lashes remained heavy against her cheeks.

  Fighting back tears, I lifted Neva's hand, pressing a kiss to the center of her palm. To my surprise, my lips met something other than skin. I drew back, studying it more closely. It was hard to see in the dark, but I thought I caught a glint of something glittering. "Belle, bring your candle over here."

  She gave me a look of confusion, but she left her chair and carried her candle over. As she held the flickering light near Neva's hand, I gasped. A tiny sliver of glass, no bigger than the edge of my thumbnail, was embedded in her skin. At once, I knew what had happened. "Go get a pair of tweezers, and hurry!"

  Belle left without asking for an explanation. I continued holding Neva's hand in mine, still stunned. It seemed ridiculous that such a tiny thing could have caused her enchanted sleep, or that none of us could have noticed it, but Ailynn had instructed us to disturb her as little as possible. Against my better judgment, hope began stirring within me. Perhaps if we removed it, she would wake.

  "Let me look," Jessith said, crawling across Neva's stomach to peer at her hand. Her ears flattened against her head, and she hissed. "This reminds me of that enchanted comb. It smells the same."

  A moment later, Belle rushed back into the room, brandishing the pair of tweezers. "Here," she said, passing them over. "See if you can get it out."

  While she took up her candle again, I dug out the shard of glass. It didn't come loose easily, but finally, I managed to pluck it free. It pulsed with light, and a single drop of crimson blood welled up from the tiny prick in the middle of Neva's palm. Her eyes fluttered, and for the first time in two long weeks, she opened her mouth. "Ellie? Belle? Jessith!" She sat up, wrapping her arms tight around Jessith's neck.

  "I see who gets the most enthusiastic greeting," Belle said, but her grin gave her away.

  Neva let go of Jessith and latched onto both of us, tucking her face into my shoulder. "You're still here. I'm so glad."

  Belle laughed, squeezing the two of us tighter. "How could we think of going anywhere without you?"

  "I told you we weren't going to leave," I said, blinking back my tears. They streamed down my face anyway despite my attempts to stifle them. "Didn't I promise?"

  Neva looked up at me, her eyes brimming as well. "You did. And I love you both, too.”

  Afterword

  ACCORDING TO THE SOURCES used throughout this manuscript, it took several months for things to return to normal in the kingdom of Amendyr, but return to normal they did. With Feradith’s need for justice met, the dragons departed and returned to the Rengast Mountains.

  Under Jett Bahari’s leadership, Kalmarin was rebuilt to its former glory, although not quite the same as before. The courtyard where Ailynn’s battle with Mogra remained, transformed into a monument for those who gave their lives.

  As for Ailynn herself, she and Raisa stayed in Kalmarin for some time afterward, making a study of its library and assisting with the restoration efforts until the birth of their children—twin boys who gave Ailynn the sense of peace she had struggled for so long to find. With Raisa’s permission, she named them Rufas and Hassa, after the two liarre who had carried her. Despite her considerable efforts, she was never fully able to shake her title, and Fel’Rionsa, the fire princess, was remembered as the most powerful witch of her g
eneration.

  Cathelin Raybrook and Larna returned to their home in the forest in order to rebuild the Farseer pack together. Their numbers swelled with the addition of the wyr Mogra had enslaved, and though there was a considerable amount of mistrust between the survivors and the new recruits, Larna managed to merge them together successfully. Cate took over the use of Kalwyn’s hut, and many wyr with magical abilities were honored to call her their teacher. To this day, the Farseer pack is still led by their descendants, and the villages near the border no longer fear the Forest’s dangers.

  Lady Eleanor and Lady Belladonna returned to Seria with several extra additions to their party. After much argument, it was agreed that Neva should accompany them. Mostly because she refused to attend her coronation, and no one felt like challenging a ten-year-old girl who could converse with the dead. She and her new guardians arrived to find Baxstresse recovered from the traumatic night of their escape. Most of their friends were unharmed, and to Belladonna’s immense relief, the library was still intact.

  The Serian court was, of course, scandalized when Princess Neva was first presented, or rather, re-presented there, especially since she was accompanied by a giant undead dog and several dwellyn. But after Mogra’s attack on the palace, Prince Brendan had no patience for their shock. He married the Lady Sarah, despite numerous protests, and at his firm insistence, Seria became much more friendly with its neighbors to the west. Though it took time, the stigma against those with magical abilities gradually began to decrease. After several decades, Ronin did indeed become a place of learning almost as fine as Kalmarin, just as Cieran and Cassandra had always hoped.

  All six of our heroines kept in close correspondence until the end of their days, and they lived happily ever after.

  Your servant,

  Rowena

  Princess of Seria, Keeper of the Royal Library