The F-Word

by Jesse Sheidlower

  1986 P. Nobile & E. Nadler United States of America vs. Sex 149: She unveiled the new paraphilia of “skull-fucking.”…These are films in which a woman is killed and the orifices in her head are penetrated with a man’s penis—her eyes, her mouth, and so on. 1987 Full Metal Jacket (film): I’m going to give you three seconds, exactly three fucking seconds, to wipe that stupid-looking grin off your face, or I will gouge out your eyes and skull-fuck you. 1996 C. Logan Hunter’s Moon 153: Call off the tribe or I swear to God I’ll pop out your left eyeball and skull-fuck you to death. 2000 A. Bourdain Kitchen Confidential 144: I made the mistake of telling a garde-manger man that if he didn’t hurry up with an order I’d tear his eyes out and skull-fuck him. 2002 J. Goad Shit Magnet vii. 93: This from someone who had slaughtered at least thirteen people and skull-fucked an elderly woman after murdering her and plucking out her eyeball. 2002 J. Dee Palladio 225: I want to rip his head off and shit into it, I want to pop his lying eyes out with a spoon and skullfuck him. 2009 J. Stewart on Daily Show (Comedy Central TV) (Feb. 9): This bill will fuck our economy in the eye. And after skull-fucking our economy this bill—this bill and Hitler will laugh and laugh.

  snafu noun [situation normal: all fucked up; often interpreted in euphemistic variants, especially with fouled].

  1. Army. Especially in early use: used as an expression indicating the botched or confused nature of the military.

  1941 San Francisco Chronicle (June 15) 5/4: “Snafu” means “situation normal, all fuddled up.” 1941 American Notes & Queries I (Sept. 4) 94: Snafu—situation normal [sic]. 1942 Time (June 15): The Army has a laconic term for chronic befuddlement: snafu, situation normal; all fouled up. 2002 T. Lott Rumours of Hurricane i. 22: The local binmen are in the midst of a dispute. This does not seem extraordinary to Charlie, merely an irritatingly private blip in an otherwise consistent pattern of public life. “Snafu,” thinks Charlie, his mind skipping back to army language. Situation normal, all fucked up.

  2. Originally Army. a botched or confused situation, especially a military operation botched by incompetent planning or execution of orders. Also in mass use: confusion, disorder.

  1943 Best from Yank (Sept. 10) 9: They worked hard and steadily, with a minimum of snafu. 1946 W. W. Haines Command Decision 11: But yesterday they [sic] was a SNAFU at the Quartermaster’s and he run clean out of Spam. 1948 J. G. Cozzens Guard of Honor 184: It’s a stupid damn snafu. 1953 M. Dibner Deep Six 23: He’s chasing down another of your snafus. 1958 A. Hailey & J. Castle Runway Zero-Eight 9: It would have to be a big show in Vancouver to justify this snafu. 1962 E. Shepard Forgive us Our Press Passes 60: On the housing snafu, he displayed the statement of a leading Soviet lawyer [etc.]. 1963 T. Doulis Path for our Valor 223: There’s gonna be a big snafu.… It means situation normal, all…fucked up. 1982 J. M. Del Vecchio 13th Valley 1: It was one more snafu in a series of snafus. 1983 J. Groen & D. Groen Huey 105: John, your orders won’t be coming in for two or three weeks. Some kind of a snafu. 1984 N.Y. Post (Aug. 2) 60: Bettors furious over Big A snafus. 1992 H. N. Schwarzkopf It Doesn’t Take a Hero xvii. 311: All were competing for space in the same airplanes and cargo ships, and an enormous amount of my time was devoted to untangling snafus. 1999 Scientific American (Nov.) 35/3: Two years ago corporate and individual domain name registrants were united in their hatred of Network Solutions, complaining of billing snafus, unwarranted suspensions and technical ineptitude.

  snafu adjective Army.

  1. Of a situation, etc.: hopelessly botched or confused. [Most early quotations refer to WWII.]

  1941 Kansas City Star (July 27) 5A: That time you wrote you’d been talking to your captain for half an hour and everything was snafu, you got us terribly worked up.… Everything is strictly snafu. 1942 in C.R. Bond & T. Anderson Flying T. Diary 183: What a SNAFU operation. 1943 J. Twist Bombardier (film): You’ll be plenty snafu if Captain Oliver hears about this. 1943 R. L. Scott God Is My Co-Pilot 22: And so we began our airmail flying—slightly SNAFU, as we have learned to say from the gremlins in World War II. 1944 Collier’s (Apr. 1) 21: This all sounds snafu. 1945 Chase This Man’s Navy (film): This place is all mixed up, snafu. 1945 Scowley & Friel 513th Retrospect (unpaged): Once on shore things began to go SNAFU. 1947 Startling Stories (May) 112/2: Poor printing and snafu artwork keeps this Detroit zine down in the doldrums despite a high-powered lineup that includes Brazier, Elsner, Tigrina and Joe Kennedy. 1948 A. Murphy To Hell and Back 1: If the landing schedule had not gone snafu, we would have come ashore with the assault waves. 1953 K. Dodson Away All Boats 285: This is the most snafu beach I ever did see. 1959 B. Cochrell Barren Beaches of Hell 84: “Jesus,” Willy said. “Sounds sort of snafu.” 1970 J. W. Corrington Bombardier 53: The coffee splashed out, and the sugar fell into the eggs, and it was snafu. 1995 T. Clancy Op-Center xxxv. 157: They were all part of the same SNAFU scheme of things.

  2. Or a person: worthless, useless; mentally confused; crazy.

  1946 I. Gershwin My Son-in-Law in R. Kimball Complete Lyrics of Ira Gershwin (1993) 346/2: He may look good to you,/Your son-in-law:/To me he’s just snafu,/Your son-in-law. 1975 J. Stanley WWIII 87: He’s snafu, Sarge, snafu. I’m on your side. I swear it.

  snafu verb Originally Army.

  1. to bring into a state of great confusion; ruin through incompetence; botch; confuse; FUCK UP. Usually snafued, adjective.

  1943 L. Cane Letter (July 6) in Fighting Facism in Europe (2003) 56: Gosh everything seems to be snafued for me the past few days. 1943 F. Wakeman Shore Leave 66: “There you go,” the P-Boat pilot said. “Letting a lot of big sloppy words get you all snafued.” 1944 B. Stiles Serenade to the Big Bird 74: It can snafu the works. 1948 B. Lay & S. Bartlett Twelve O’Clock High! 45: The warning order just came down.… Snafu’d as usual. It says we’re low group at nine thousand feet. 1970 J. R. Lincke Jenny Was No Lady 20: St. Jude, the patron saint of snafued ventures. 1979 in J. Raban Old Glory 348: He ain’t going to allow some dumbhead bargeman to snafu the whole rest of his life for a can of Bud. 2002 J. J. Gobbell When Duty Whispers Low 74: Whoever snafued that plane’s engine saved my life.

  2. to blunder elaborately; FUCK UP.

  1946 J. H. Burns Gallery 317: I snafu’d just like the rest of them. 1948 Military Engineer (Vol. XL) 64: Too often men seemed not to care if they “snafued.” 1951 R. Leveridge Walk on Water 179 [refers to WWII]: Maybe the Army Post Office snafued again! 1992 A. Codevilla Informing Statecraft 327: Soviet factories have been known to snafu in grand style all by themselves.

  3. Originally Military. to go wrong, especially to become botched or confused.

  1957 W. P. McGivern Odds Against Tomorrow 175: But when things snafu they start acting like a bunch of crazy women. 1991 L. Niven et al. Fallen Angels 122: If the targeting system snafued… No, you’re probably right. 1992 Car (Feb.) 86/1: Munich’s weekend bound traffic snafus and we travel four miles in 40 minutes. 2001 E. H. Rosen Think Like a Shrink 157: Every move, every encounter has the potential to snafu.

  snefu adjective [situation normal: everything fucked up; variant of SNAFU]

  Military. = SNAFU adjective.

  1942 in P. Jordan Tunis Diary 38: SNEFU, as an American officer said at dinner.… Snefu means Situation Normal: Everything F—d Up. 1943 Hartford Courant (Mar. 6) 6/4: The same man reports that a common expression now at the Capitol when one is asked about the state of affairs is that it is “Snefu.” After considerable probing this turns out to be “situation normal, everything fogged up.”

  sportfuck noun

  an act of casual sex. Also: a person regarded as a casual sexual partner.

  1990 L. Hutchins Bi Any Other Name 328: Lesbians who end up doing what some call a “sport fuck” with a man have been in a situation, such as travel, in which a good time with a kindred spirit just happened along. 1991 D. Jenkins Gotta Play Hurt 43: Even enjoying a sport-fuck occasionally. 1994 J. L. Burke Dixie City Jam 275: “Wouldn’t you like a little sport fuck on the side?” I opened her car door and fitted my hand tightly aro
und her upper arm. 1996 C. Logan Hunter’s Moon 55: I gave up a lot for him. And not just to be his sport fuck. So yeah, I got him to make it legal. 2005 P. Levine Solomon Vs. Lord 292: Chet, you’re adorable in your own way, but you’re just a sport fuck and we both know it.

  sportfuck verb

  to engage in casual, indiscriminate copulation [with].

  1968 Paul Newman in Playboy (July) 69: There was sport fucking. There was mercy fucking. 1976 J. Bode View from Another Closet 91: After we separated and eventually divorced, I went through the typical reactions of sport-fucking, long-term affairs, brief interludes, but always with men. 1987 C. Hiaasen Double Whammy xxiv. 235: Lanie gave a shallow laugh. “The sportfucking, he didn’t mind. A different fella each night and he’d never say a word to me.” 1989 S. Chapple & D. Talbot Burning Desires 124: I still sportfish. I no longer sportfuck. 1991 University professor, age 60: You’d think he’d have some better form of recreation than sportfucking some groupie on the lawn.… Sportfuck is a word I remember from Chicago, about 1959. 2003 J. McManus Positively Fifth Street 143: As far as she was concerned, getting sport-fucked by Tabish before they burked [sc. suffocated] Ted made perfect sense. 2005 R. Hoban Come Dance with Me xv. 91: I’ve had my share of one-night stands and sport fucking and I don’t know if any of those men who didn’t mean anything to me ran into the Curse of Christabel. 2006 L. Kipnis Female Thing 4: Feminism Plan A: Strive for empowerment, smash those glass ceilings, sport-fuck like the guys.

  starfucker noun

  = CELEBRITY-FUCKER. Hence starfucking.

  1970 J. Barnes Deceivers 72: Those star-fuckers at the other agencies were probably sucking up to Curtis and Lang till hell wouldn’t have it. 1970 J. Grissim Country Music 259: In the rock and roll fifties they were called star-fuckers. In the acid rock world of the Sixties (and now Seventies) they were called groupies. 1972 Playboy (Aug.) 70: Groupies and star-fuckers abound and you certainly don’t have to marry them, though a lot of poor fools do. 1973 M. Jagger & K. Richards Star Star (song, perf. “Rolling Stones”): Lead guitars and movie stars get their tongue beneath your hood.Yeah! You’re a star fucker, star fucker, star fucker, star fucker. 1978 C. Crawford Mommie Dearest 277: They were the “starfuckers,” people who…would go to any lengths to have their own names associated with anyone famous. These people were not just fans, they had professions and services to sell. 1981 C. Nelson Picked Bullets Up 181: Because of his notoriety as a bisexual star-fucker. 1990 Nation (June 4) 796: Wenner,…inveterate starfucker (he once claimed to have started the magazine [Rolling Stone] in order to meet John Lennon). 1992 Vanity Fair (Nov.) 283: Some people might say he’s star-fucking. 1993 New Republic (Nov. 15) 34: The ’60s turned even serious people into starfuckers. 1998 “M. Manson” & N. Strauss Marilyn Manson xvi. 253: Another starfucker and sycophant sucking the life out of me and distracting me from the conversation that I want to have. 2003 L. Block Small Town 286: That didn’t mean he could abandon her and trot off after some tail-wagging cupcake.… This wasn’t the night for a romp with a starfucker.

  STFU interjection

  “Shut The Fuck Up.”

  1991 Re: ALL: How to Save alt.evil!!! on Usenet newsgroup alt.evil (Dec. 29): When you find your brain, let us know. Until then, STFU. 1997 C. Parker Joy of Cybersex 183: STFU Shut the fuck up. 1998 Independent (Apr. 2) 6: Unfortunately the “STFU-During Performances” sign was too subtle a warning. 2002 E. Jansen NetLingo 458: STFU “Shut The F*#k Up.” 2006 Bucks County Courier Times (Jan. 26) 2G: I bet they doodle on their paper and write things like, stfu kerry.

  sympathy fuck noun

  = PITY FUCK.

  1973 J. Harrison Good Day to Die 68: Nobody wants a sympathy fuck. I would never fuck a girl again if it was a sympathy fuck. 1978 W. Brown Tragic Magic 97: You’d be surprised how many sympathy fucks I got cause I didn’t have no hand. 1987 C. J. Hribal American Beauty 38: “So he wants a sympathy fuck.” Mia exhales at the ceiling. “Exactly.” 2001 J. Weiner Good in Bed 203: “You’re not back together?” “No. It was…”…“Not to worry,” she said, effectively ending my attempts to think of an appropriate euphemism for sympathy fuck. 2007 J. McPhee Man of no Moon 208: You should know by now that every time I fuck it’s a sympathy fuck.

  T

  tarfu noun & adjective [things are really fucked up; suggested by SNAFU]

  Especially U.S. Army. = SNAFU.

  1942 Time (Nov. 30) 70: “Snafu,” pronounced “snaffoo”—a good, grumbling Army word, now has a superlative… The new superlative, discovered by correspondents in Britain: “tarfu” (“things are really fouled up”). 1944 E. Pyle Brave Men 212: The colonel had a coal-black Labrador retriever named Tarfu. That’s one of those mytic military names which you’ll have to get somebody else to explain to you. ca1944 in G. M. Valant Vintage Aircraft Nose Art 295: Tarfu. 1945 in California Folklore Quarterly V (1946) 387: TARFU. fouled up. 1948 J. G. Cozzens Guard of Honor 409: On the side of the plane’s black nose, spiritedly sketched in dark red paint, was a cavorting skeleton who danced with a nude woman. Under it, in fancy letters, were the words: Tarfu Tessie. 1972 B. Davidson Cut Off 30: Tarfu, a word coined around the time of the Battle of the Bulge, was…the acronym for Things Are Really Fucked Up. Ibid.: In a Tarfu like this, nothing surprises me. 2007 R. Atkinson Day of Battle 78: The action, in Gavin’s assessment was “self-adjusting,” a SAFU, as well as a TARFU and a JAAFU.

  throat-fuck verb

  = MOUTH-FUCK, verb.

  1975 N. Jennings Bondage & Boyflesh 96: The others gathered around to watch their thick-cocked leader throat-fucking the handsome young queen. 1980 S. McCarthy in Humanist (Sept./Oct.) 15: The February Penthouse contains an ugly letter from someone who claims to be a sophomore at a large midwestern university and is “into throat-fucking.” He writes of Kathy and how he was “ramming his huge eleven-inch tool down her throat.” 1990 G. Fisher Journal (Apr. 14) in Gary in your Pocket (1996) 234: Jan sucks Ham near climax (he throat-fucks her)… Description of the face-fuck. 2007 J. Norton Happy Endings 126: Twenty minutes later you’re back in your hotel room throat-fucking her bareback while praying she’s HIV negative.

  tit-fuck noun

  an act of rubbing the penis between a woman’s breasts; FRENCH FUCK. Also as verb. Also titty-fuck.

  [1879 Harlequin Prince Cherrytop 4: Breast fuck, best fuck, Cherry’s prick shall ne’er be in it.] 1972 R.A. Wilson Playboy’s Book of Forbidden Words 285: Tit fuck Insertion of the penis between a lady’s breasts. 1975 Ribald (Sydney, Australia) (Sept. 18) 2: “Down in the valley something stirred.” English-speaking people called it a tit-fuck. 1976 J. Vasco Three-Hole Girl 20: Lisa’s jugs looked like they’d feel great if she pressed them down around his dick and let him tit-fuck her. 1984 R. Coover in Playboy (Jan. 1985) 122: Safely closeted off in his rooms over the town saloon, tit-fucking the hero’s wife. 1986 Penthouse Letters (Mar.) 89: In the soft version of Annie’s flick, we lose a great tit-fucking scene. 1987 Penthouse Letters (Oct.) 27: Her scene…ends quite rightly with a tit-fuck. 1991 B. E. Ellis American Psycho viii. 79: I tell her I would like to tit-fuck her and then maybe cut her arms off. 1998 Schizo (#3) [back cover]: I heard Gary Coleman titty-fucked your DAD! 1999 F. Renzulli Toodle-fucking-oo (television shooting script) in Sopranos (2nd Series) 35: Shaen: (Ed Sullivan) And now for you youngsters, with visions of tit-fucking in your heads, the Bing girls! Come on out here. Pole-dancing resumes. 2007 S. Seligson Stacked 72: Have you seen this month’s issue of Hard Nipple Hotties? They ran a feature about tit fucking.

  tongue fuck verb

  to perform oral sex on (a person, or a body part). Also as noun.

  1870 Cythera’s Hymnal in G. Legman Limerick (1954) 91: He shyly confessed,/“I like tongue-fucking best.” 1870 Cythera’s Hymnal in G. Legman Limerick (1954) 91: His whores said he always was poking ’em,/But all he could do/Was to tongue-fuck a few. 1968 L. Harrington In Drag 98: He felt for sure, Jeff had managed to tongue-fuck him. 1974 R. Price Wanderers 203: Tokyo had whorehouses where they did Japanese tongue
fucks that drove a man crazy. 1979 P. J. Farmer Image of Beast 89: He…tongue-fucked her while his fingers increased the speed of their in-and-outs into her cunt and anus. 1982 S. Hite Hite Report on Male Sexuality 728: I also “tongue-fuck” her by shoving my tongue in and out of her hole. 1982 N. Friday Forbidden Flowers 184: After a while, she takes it out and tongue fucks me and after a while would place her finger in my juicy wet cunt up and down till I had an orgasm. 1991 R. Meltzer Of Peep Shows & Piano Bars in Whore Just Like Rest (2000) 429: A little overboard on anilingus…, lines like “‘Ooooh,’ she wailed, ‘you’re tongue-fucking my shitter!’” 2005 “Noire” Candy Licker ii. 27: I got my first tongue fuck when I was fourteen.… Not one person had prepared me for what it would be like when a man actually opened me up and touched me with his tongue. 2007 H. Hunter Insatiable 149: I licked the juices off the side of her thighs…before I began to tongue-fuck her.

  U

  unfuck verb

  1. (used as an imprecation or oath); God damn; to hell with; curse. [Used as a substitution for FUCK verb definition 4.a., on the grounds that fuck denotes a pleasurable act that one would not want to wish on the person being cursed.]

  1963 A. Ellis If This be Sexual Heresy 95: By the same token you should say “I had an unfucking bad time.” Q. I can see this, you know?—In the subways, two or three centuries from now: “Unfuck you!” a1966 L. Bruce in S. Pinker Stuff of Thought (2007) 346: If I really wanted to hurt you I should say “Unfuck you, Mister.” Because “Fuck you” is really nice! 1966 B. Deming Prison Notes: A former prisoner has scratched in wide letters: FUCK THE COPS! It should really be UNFUCK THE COPS, one peacewalker has suggested; unlove them is what is meant.