A Legacy of Love

by Amy Clipston

  “How are the rest of your wedding plans coming along?”

  She swallowed, stalling for time. Why did he want to hear about her wedding? Her own father wasn’t interested in the details. “They’re coming along fine. Betty has given me some great ideas for table decorations, and we’re starting to write out the invitations.”

  “What do you love about Josh?”

  For some reason her answer stuck in her throat for a moment. “He’s nice, kind, and thoughtful. We get along well, and we never argue. It’s just a gut, easy relationship.”

  Leon nodded as if waiting for her to add more.

  “He’s also a dairy farmer like mei dat, and his farm is next to ours, which is really nice. When we’re married, I can still walk over to my parents’ haus and help mei mamm or mei schweschder when they need me. And the same is true when I need mei mamm or mei schweschder. They can walk over to mei haus. We can cook and sew together, you know?”

  “I suppose that’s important.”

  “It is.” Her cheeks flamed with sudden embarrassment.

  He raised his palms toward her with his eyebrows careening toward his hairline. “Okay. What else do you love about him?”

  Her thoughts spun as she stared at his expectant expression. The room suddenly felt as if it were closing in on her. She tried to take a deep breath, but her lungs refused to fill. She had to get out of there.

  She looked at the clock on the wall and then stood. “I should go. I’ve kept you from your work long enough.” She picked up her bag. “It was nice seeing you.”

  “Wait.” He started after her. “I didn’t mean to scare you off.”

  “You didn’t,” she called over her shoulder. “I just didn’t realize how late it was. I’ll see you soon.” She waved to his father and brother as she hurried through the showroom, hoping to catch her breath and calm her anxiety once outside.

  Why did Leon make her feel so off-balance?

  Susie stared out the window of the pickup truck during the ride back to her farm. Her thoughts spun with the memory of her conversation with Leon, and her throat burned as she remembered how angry she got when he asked about what had gone wrong with their relationship.

  She swallowed a groan as she rested her head against the cool window. Why was she torturing herself with memories of Leon and their relationship? That was all history. Leon was her past, and Josh was her future. Josh was loyal and kind, and he was reliable. He wouldn’t just let her go like Leon had.

  She sat up straight as her farm came into view and Grayson turned onto the long rock driveway that led to the back porch.

  As the truck came to a stop, a thought grabbed hold of her. If Josh was the one for her, then where was the spark she’d always had with Leon?

  Leon kicked the doorway’s baseboard as Susie disappeared through the front door of the store. Great job! You scared her off with your personal questions!

  He scowled as he went back to the rocking chair and continued to take it apart. Their conversation echoed through his mind. He’d never expected Susie to get angry when he asked her about why they broke up. Had the breakup hurt her so deeply that she was still angry four years later? But she’d said they would be friends, and she behaved like a friend. So why was she so irate when he wondered if she had wanted to break up because she didn’t think he could follow through with anything—not even their relationship?

  If I’d promised to marry her eventually, would we have stayed together?

  That notion swirled among his thoughts as additional regret curled low in his gut. And then her words describing Josh echoed through his mind.

  He’s nice, kind, and thoughtful. We get along well, and we never argue. It’s just a gut, easy relationship.

  Was Josh everything Leon wasn’t—everything she needed and craved in a husband?

  But then the rest of what she said about Josh struck him. How he was a dairy farmer like her father, and about how his building a house next door to her parents was handy because she’d be within walking distance of her family.

  It sounded as though theirs was going to be a marriage of convenience. Yet it wasn’t Leon’s place to judge Susie’s future marriage. That was her business.

  But then why did the idea of her marrying Josh give Leon heartburn? A new level of regret—sudden, sharp, and stinging—sliced through him.

  When he looked back, he saw their relationship with a new perspective. Had Susie been in search of a promise, not a rush into marriage? I was ready to make a commitment, she’d said. Would she have agreed to wait for him a couple of years if he’d promised they’d marry after he’d saved some money for their future?

  He shoved the thought away and focused on the rocking chair. Memories of time spent in Susie’s parents’ family room washed over him. He recalled her sitting in her grandmother’s chair while he sat in her grandfather’s chair after church on Sundays. They’d talk and laugh with her parents and then spend Sunday evening playing board games with friends.

  Many of their happiest memories were wrapped up in that antique hickory wood. Would she ever think of Leon while she sat in one of these chairs in her new home with her husband?

  “That bad, huh?”

  “What?” Leon looked over his shoulder at Ben, who was standing at his workstation with his eyebrows raised and his arms folded over his chest.

  “I asked if you still have feelings for Susie.”

  “Why would you ask me that again?” Leon turned to face him.

  “Well, let’s see.” Ben rubbed his chin. “You’ve been back here working in a daze ever since she left.”

  “I’ve just been busy.” Leon shrugged and then turned back to the chair.

  “Uh-huh. How long are you going to tell yourself stuff like that?”

  For as long as it takes to erase her from my mind. “I’m busy, Ben. You need to get back to work too.”

  How would he ever get Susie’s beautiful face out of his head?

  CHAPTER 5

  I love the color!” Betty exclaimed as she ran her fingers over the dress material. “It’s perfect.” She placed it on the kitchen table and grinned at Susie.

  “I agree.” Mamm’s blue eyes glimmered. “I’m so froh you picked green.”

  “Danki.” Susie’s smile widened as she recalled Leon’s compliment—You always looked great in green. She pushed the thought away and crossed to a cabinet. “Would you like me to put on the kettle for tea?”

  “Ya, that would be nice.” Mamm opened the cookie jar. “I’ll grab some kichlin.”

  Susie filled the kettle and placed it on a burner before setting three mugs and teabags on the counter. Then she sat down at the table across from her sister and mother.

  “You were gone for a while.” Betty picked up a chocolate chip cookie from the plate Mamm had set in the middle of the table. “Did you go anywhere other than the fabric store?”

  Susie plucked a cookie from the plate. “I stopped at the Kings’ furniture store.” She took a bite and savored the sweet taste.

  “You went to see Leon?” Mamm asked.

  Susie started to nod, but then she said, “Well, I went to see if he’d made any progress on the chairs.”

  “Had he?” Mamm asked.

  “Not much. He’s been busy with other projects, so he’d just started taking apart Mammi’s chair today.” She took another bite of the cookie as remembering the discussion about their breakup sent tension through her body. Why did it bother her so much? Pushing away yet another thought, she finished eating the cookie.

  “That’s nice that he’s doing that for you,” Mamm said, no doubt oblivious to her daughter’s inner turmoil.

  “How much is he charging you to rebuild and restain each chair?” Betty asked.

  “I don’t know. We haven’t discussed his fee.” Susie gathered up crumbs with her fingers and then swept them into a napkin.

  “I bet he’ll do it for free.”

  Susie’s gaze snapped to her sister’s. “Why do you
think he would do that?”

  Betty gave her a little smile. “Because I think he still cares about you.”

  “No, he doesn’t.” Susie’s heart thumped, but she ignored it.

  “He looked awfully froh to see you when we dropped off the chairs.”

  “You’re being gegisch. We’re just freinden. Besides, I don’t expect to get anything for free. I’ll pay him like any other customer.”

  “I know you don’t expect it, but I’m certain he won’t charge you.”

  “Stop, Betty.” Susie’s patience was wearing thin. “I’m engaged to Josh, and Leon knows that.” She needed to change the subject. “I’m really excited to put the rocking chairs in my new haus, Mamm. I feel like I’ll have a piece of Mammi and Daadi with me, you know?”

  Her mother smiled. “That’s why your mammi gave them to you, that and because she knew how much you liked them.”

  The kettle began to whistle, and Susie hopped up from the table. She poured hot water into each of the mugs, added the tea bags, and then carried them to the table on a tray. “Mamm, what do you remember most about Mammi and Daadi?”

  “What do you mean?” Mamm stirred sugar into her tea.

  “What was their relationship like?” Susie wrapped her fingers around her mug, enjoying the warmth of the ceramic. “Since Daadi died when I was six, I don’t have many memories of them together.”

  “They had a wunderbaar relationship.” Mamm had a faraway look in her eyes as if she were lost in the memory. “They were very loving to each other. They always held hands, whether they were walking through a store together or walking from the barn to the house.

  “They liked to tease each other, and they always laughed. He’d say something to tease her, and she would come right back at him.” Mamm snickered. “One time they were bickering over something gegisch. I can’t remember what it was. He said something to her, and she started waving a wooden spoon at him. She accidentally let it go, and it hit the small window over the kitchen sink and cracked it.”

  Susie and Betty gasped in unison.

  “Was he angry?” Susie asked.

  “No, no.” Mamm waved off the idea. “They both laughed about it, and he replaced the window the next day.” She ran her fingers around the rim of her mug. “They had a truly loving relationship. Of course they argued sometimes. All couples do. But they were like best freinden too. They trusted each other, and in many ways they completed each other.”

  Susie swallowed as doubt crept into her heart. Is my relationship with Josh as strong as Mammi and Daadi’s was? Would Mammi approve of Josh?

  “Do you think you and Dat have a relationship like your parents had?” Betty asked.

  Mamm looked at her. “What do you think?”

  Betty nodded. “Ya, I do. You and Dat like to laugh and tease a lot.” She looked at Susie. “Right?”

  “Ya, right. You do.” Susie took another cookie from the plate. “Did you ever question your feelings for Dat?”

  Mamm’s smile faded. “No, never once. Do you have doubts about Josh?”

  “No, I don’t.” Susie forced a smile to calm the concern she felt in her mother’s eyes.

  “When are you going to start on the dresses?” Betty asked.

  “Tomorrow.”

  “Gut.” Betty picked up a cookie. “I can’t wait.”

  Susie was drying washed utensils after supper when a knock sounded on the back door. She turned to her mother. “Who could that be?”

  “I don’t know.” Mamm shook her head as she dried her hands on a dish towel. “I’ll get it!” Betty rushed to the back door.

  “You weren’t expecting Josh to visit tonight?” Mamm asked.

  “No.” Susie set some of the utensils in a drawer.

  “Susie!” Betty called from the mudroom. “It’s for you.”

  “I’ll put those away.” Mamm took the utensils from her. “Go see who it is.”

  Susie hurried to the mudroom, where Betty stood talking with Josh. He had a potted flower in one hand and a lantern in the other.

  “See you later.” Betty grinned at Susie before going back to the kitchen.

  “Hi, Josh,” Susie said with a smile. “I didn’t expect to see you tonight.”

  “I have something to give you.” He held up a hyacinth plant with leaves a brilliant hue of blue. “I saw this at the farmers market today, and I had to get it for you. I know how much you love hyacinths.”

  “Oh my goodness.” She gaped as she took it from him. “Danki.” She breathed in the sweet aroma. “It’s schee.”

  “Just like you.”

  “You’re too sweet.” She smelled the flowers again and guilt wafted over her. How could she ever doubt her feelings for her thoughtful, generous fiancé?

  “Do you have some time to talk, Susie?”

  “Ya.” She set the flower on the bench in the mudroom. “Would you like to sit outside?”

  “That would be nice. It’s not too cold.”

  She grabbed her wrap and then followed him out to the porch swing. As they sat down, Josh set his Coleman lantern on the floor.

  “How was your day?” She gave the swing a little push.

  “Gut. I got my chores done, and then I took mei mamm to the farmers market. How was yours?”

  “It was gut.” She turned her face toward his. “I bought the material for the wedding dresses today.”

  “Really.” A grin lit his entire face. “That’s wunderbaar!”

  “I’m going to start making Betty’s tomorrow. I can’t wait.” She ran her palm over the smooth arm of the swing as she recalled her other errand. “I stopped by the furniture store before I came home.”

  “You went to see Leon again?” His head tipped to the side, his brow furrowed.

  “I didn’t go to see Leon. I just wanted to check on the rocking chairs.” She took in his hard expression, but before she could speak, he blew out a deep sigh.

  “I don’t understand why you need to keep seeing Leon.”

  “I’m not.” She pressed her lips together. “I told you, I just wanted to check on how he’s doing with the chairs. You know how important they are to me. But he had just started taking apart mei mammi’s chair because of other projects he had to finish first.”

  He studied her for a moment as his hard expression transformed to a simple frown. “Do you still have feelings for Leon?”

  “What?” She’d choked out the question. “No, not at all. He’s just a gut freind who’s restoring the chairs for our haus.” She shifted so her body was angled toward his. “This is about getting our haus ready.”

  His lips formed a thin line, and an uncomfortable silence stretched between them. She had to redirect the conversation, and the discussion with her mother about her grandparents came to mind.

  “What do you remember about your grandparents?”

  His confused expression locked with hers. “What?”

  “What do you remember about your grandparents?”

  “I don’t know.” He shrugged. “I never knew mei dat’s parents, and mei mamm’s parents passed away when I was ten.”

  “What do you remember about your mamm’s parents, then?”

  He adjusted the straw hat on his head. “Well, they were nice.”

  She laughed. “Anything more specific?”

  “What details are you looking for?”

  “How did they act together?”

  “Act together?” His brow furrowed again. “What do you mean?”

  “With each other.” She gestured between them. “Were they loving to each other? Did they tease each other or make each other laugh?”

  “I don’t know.” He frowned as irritation seemed to radiate from him. “They were fine together, I guess.”

  She swallowed a frustrated sigh. He didn’t understand what she was trying to pull from his memories. She stared out at the darkening sky in the direction of their future home.

  “Why are you asking me about my grandparents?”


  “Mei mamm was talking about her parents earlier.” She settled back on the swing. “I’d asked her what her parents were like, and she said they were very loving.” Susie folded her hands in her lap and kept her gaze trained on the dark pasture in front of her. “They used to tease each other. One time they were acting gegisch, and Mammi accidentally threw a wooden spoon and cracked the window above the sink.” She chuckled.

  “Really? Was your daadi angry?”

  “No. They laughed about it, and he replaced the window the next day.”

  “Huh. I can’t imagine mei daadi laughing off a broken window.”

  She looked over at him. “Would you?”

  “I don’t know. I guess it depends on the circumstances and whether I had the money to replace it.”

  Disappointment wiped away Susie’s smile. She’d hoped Josh would laugh at the story and tell her he’d forgive her if she cracked a window with a wooden spoon. Suddenly she remembered her mother saying her parents always held hands. She reached for Josh’s hand, but he moved it away, placing it on his knee. The rejection stabbed at her heart, and she swallowed back the disappointment that threatened to rise.

  The heavy silence from earlier returned as they both stared out toward the pasture. She bit her lower lip and racked her brain for something to say.

  “I didn’t get a chance to work on the haus today, but I plan to work on it tomorrow,” Josh said, finally breaking through the stifling quiet. “Mei dat and bruder said they’d help me.”

  “Oh gut.” She turned to look at him. “What do you want to accomplish tomorrow?”

  “We finished putting up the sheetrock, so we’ll probably start painting.”

  “I’m so excited!” She clasped her hands together. “Tell me more about the haus.”

  But then he yawned.

  “I should get going.” He stood and then took her hand and helped her to her feet. “It’s late. Danki for sitting outside with me.”

  “I enjoyed it.” She smiled up at him, determined to end the evening on a good note—even though she didn’t understand why he wouldn’t let her take his hand earlier. Had she made him uncomfortable, talking about her grandparents’ affection? “Danki for the schee flower.”