BOMAW 12-14

by Mercedes Keyes

  "Godalmighty, what is wrong with me? Fuckin' get over it man! Come on shit-head! She's just a girl! You can shake this dude, you can shake this! What the hell???" He grew frustrated with himself, pacing back and forth, muttering to himself in the dark, feeling as though he was going crazy from it all. "I gotta get the hell out of here! I gotta, I can't take it!" He clicked on his light and started getting his stuff together. He packed everything that he could, that he would need. He knew it was late, in the middle of the night, he didn't care - he wasn't going to get any sleep anyway. He could finish up his work in Chicago and mail it all in, completed.

  He would spend all of Friday in Chicago, come down for the wedding Saturday morning and then head right back - he'd skip the reception altogether. Once that was behind him, he'd take off for California. While there, he'd do what Shawn told him, see about mama Jojo, help her get packed, because he knew that Shawn would be going for her right after the wedding. In truth, he could wait for Shawn, but he wouldn't - he needed to make his move and make it now.

  Like a thief in the night, he loaded up his car, locked up his grandparents place and headed for his dads house. He arrived there a little after one in the morning; he had a key - so let himself in through the basement door. Through the house he crept, trying to be quiet... along the hallway, he went to his dad's and Vivian's room. He tapped on the door, holding his breath, hoping that his father was the one he'd wake.

  A moment later, the door came open with a bleary-eyed Jake looking out at him, eyes squinted, brow furrowed, his expression questioning.

  Ben gave an apologetic smile, "I need something from you dad," he whispered.

  Jake sighed, nodded and came out of the room, closing the door gently behind him. He was wearing his lounge pants that he slept in, and nothing else. Leading the way downstairs, he asked, "What's going on?"

  "I'm ah - heading out - well, to Chicago."

  Jake stopped at the bottom of the stairs, turned to look at Ben, "What about the wedding?"

  "I'll be here for your wedding dad, don't worry." He assured him.

  Jake turned back leading the way to the kitchen, "Why?" He asked simply, there wasn't a need for him to say anything more, Ben knew what he wanted to know.

  "It's not like you didn't know, I've been talking about it for a while now."

  "You said maybe, and you said, after the wedding - maybe." Jake stressed.

  "My mind is made up dad, I can't take it anymore."

  Leaning against the counter now, arms crossed, Jake stared at his older son, whom he shared with his older brother. As his gaze settled upon him, he realized that he'd lost weight, anywhere from 10 to 15lbs. He knew that he'd worked his ass off with him on the house, doing above and beyond the call of duty, but he, Vivian, Sylvia everyone had provided ample food during that time; there was no reason for him to have lost weight.

  As he stared, he didn't know what to tell him, how to make things better, he wasn't in the dark - no one was.

  Ben and Crystal were in love.

  One just as much in love as the other.

  Everyone saw it.

  They saw the way he was around her, and how he tried to avoid her.

  They saw the way she was around him, and her efforts to seek him out.

  They all knew the hold up was Crystal - who was trapped in trying to fulfill some silly obligation she felt she owed Victor and his sons.

  Jake blew out and ran his hand over the top of his head, finally asking, "How long you talking about leaving for?" He was really concerned now, he wasn't used to not having his sons around him. For one of them to just take off, it had an essence of Shawn's actions - all over again.

  "Hadn't really given that a thought, to be honest with you."

  Jake swallowed, sighed, "Ben - don't take off on us, and lose your way back home - the way, your father did." Jake could say it, be open and out about it all now - things had been worked out, sort of speak, between them all.

  Ben didn't know what to say, "We'll see. It's not like, you won't know where I am. Plus, you'll be coming out there, recording right?"

  Jake nodded, "Right." He looked around, squirmed a bit nervously, then glanced back to Ben, "You know I love you, right? No matter what, you'll always be my son, right?"

  Ben smiled, "Just think, was it not a few months ago I was reminding you of that." He winked at his father.

  Jake grinned, "I was being a jerk, couldn't take that medicine, it was hard to swallow, but I'm all better now." He opened his arms to him. Ben stepped into them and they hugged tight and strong. Opening a space between them, Jake held him a moment more, looking into his eyes, "You looking for keys, huh?"

  "Yeah."

  "Tell you what, take'em - go - get yourself copies made, and bring mine back when you return for the wedding."

  "Thanks dad, will do."

  One more strong hug, they parted for Jake to get the keys, and then he was off - in his car, pointing it towards Chicago.

  Friday...

  Shawn2 was leaning over the back gate, looking towards the Clarke's yard, noticing that the family was in and out of the garden getting ready to barbecue, which meant, they must be off work. Watching his back, he glanced over his shoulder at the kitchen window of his own home, and then the back door, and back towards the Clarke's, trying to catch sight of Ma'Keiba. He didn't get it, both parents worked full time; second and third shifts; yet he couldn't get to Ma'Keiba; lord knows, he'd tried. He never knew parents who worked that could keep such close tabs on their kids, and mainly, their daughter. But they did, and he found it rather irritating, yet - still a challenge, he didn't mind a challenge. It didn't even help that Ma'Keiba and Sasha were friends; reason being, Ma'Keiba's mother, would not - let Ma'Keiba come to their house to visit with Sasha, but his mother let Sasha go there. Yes, he'd tried volunteering as an escort of Sasha, but his mother and Shelly, were perfectly happy with standing guard over his sister as she walked from one garden to the other.

  Madness!

  Two girls from the neighborhood, parents worked, he'd gotten in - got what he wanted, but he was not content with that - because both girls, had been gotten to by other guys in the neighborhood before him. Both liked him, wanted him to come back again, and maybe he would - after all, he hadn't been stupid about it, he'd used a condom; his father would be proud of that, if he knew - that is, after - he went off on him. He figured, if he ever found out, things wouldn't be so bad once he informed him that he'd used protection, carefully.

  Marcus and Luis both told him how to use them.

  Shawn2 knew that sex made you feel a funny kind of strange that was good, especially when you came; and now that he'd experienced it, it was all that he could think about - getting a girl to give him some. Using his hand was okay, in fact, he used it a lot; however, since being with a girl, it wasn't the same - not at all.

  He wondered did Ma'Keiba know that he was an experienced man now? That he'd done what she could only think about. Second thought; as he looked over his shoulder again and then back, since the cost was clear; she wasn't like the other two - she acted like she didn't even want to know how good sex was. As he leaned there, he contemplated forgetting about Ma'Keiba - after all, she wasn't quite into what he was - SEX - and being cool, hanging out. She was the kind that actually did what her parents told her to do, 'Wierd!' he thought with a shake of his head. He'd tried on three occasions, trying to talk her out of the house to meet with him, only for her to return in her smart mouth way.

  "I - said - no! You think I'm stupid Shawn2? My mama ain't raising me to be nobody's fool!"

  "Who said anything about you being a fool? Don't you wanna have any fun at all?"

  "Sorry, but gettin' my butt beat, don't sound like fun to me!"

  "If you do what I say, they won't even know!" He tried to reason with her.

  "My mama knows everything! And what she don't know, she will find out, she like that!"

  "She know I been coming here in between one going and the ot
her coming? Huh?" He asked smugly.

  "No! Because I've been careful! Which means, going no further!"

  Shawn2's brows furrowed, "You like me or not?"

  She turned the question around on him, "You like me or not? If you did, you wouldn't be working so hard to get me in trouble! I ain't stupid Shawn2! You like you! My mama said when boys are your age, it's all about what you can talk a girl into - so you can go off and brag what you did! My daddy agreed with her, says it's true - he did it all the time, because once boys get to knowing what they got hanging between they legs, they can't wait to try it out on somebody! Well that ain't gone be me! You ain't bragging nothing on me! I find out you be talking anything about me, you gone end up with a fat lip!"

  "Me? A fat lip? From you? You blind or something? You see how tall I am - shorty!? Fine! That's it for me - waste your young life away! You keep listening to your parents, you'll never get to do anything fun!" He persisted, and then called her, "Babysitter!" said as if an insult.

  "Exactly! Isn't it about your bedtime?!" She returned saucily.

  He'd stood from her porch shaking his head, "You're weird!"

  "I'd rather be weird to you, than stupid for you! Go away Shawn2!" She'd slammed the door on him.

  Days had gone by since that incident, but that something about her, was nagging him again; he walked out of his garden, across the way, not sure why he even bothered with the stupid girl - he stopped at the back gate, her mother Shelly was laying meat on the grill.

  "Hey Mrs. Clarke." He called out to her, even his voice was changing, going deeper.

  She turned slowly around, looking at him as if to say, 'Boy, what do you want?' and to confirm the look, asked just that.

  He smiled, "I was just checking; I see you barbecuing, first, I thought something was on fire in your yard, but it's not. How you doing today?"

  Shelly put her hand on her hip, "Shawn2 - what are you up to?"

  "Nothing, just - being neighborly."

  "Emmm hm, your mama and daddy know you over here, being neighborly? Hm?"

  "No ma'am, see - I just came out to put the fire out, if there was one, but - since there ain't no fire, I'll just - head on back to my yard now."

  "Yeah, you do that, I'm just fine here, no fires."

  He smiled again, "Okay; you off work tonight, huh?"

  Shelly quirked a brow at that question, making her think - "Yep, off work." She answered patiently, placing the meat on the grill.

  "You shouldn't be doing no work on your day off, you should get Ma'Keiba out here, make her do it."

  Shelly gave an all knowing smile, "Ma'Keiba is doing just fine, inside doing other things." Once more, answered with patience.

  Leaning on their gate, Shawn2 couldn't think of anything else to say, so informed her, "I guess I better go then, we're going to my grandparents, my uncle is getting married tomorrow."

  "Yes, I know - your mother told me."

  "Oh - yeah, okay then - well, guess I'll let you get back to cooking, see you all later, enjoy your day off."

  "I will," she called back over her shoulder, grinning in disbelief, the boy had some nerve. Done laying out the meat, she placed the kettle grill lid on and made her way up the steps into the back door of her kitchen. Ma'Keiba was at the sink, shucking and cleaning the fresh corn on the cob.

  "It appears Mr. McPherson is getting more and more desperate." She informed her daughter.

  Ma'Keiba was trying to play it off that she didn't know what her mother was talking about, "Huh mama?" - she was steaming - she heard and saw Shawn2 at the back gate, talking to her mother - he was determined to keep her deep in the heat with her parents.

  "Shawn2 - just now, trying to figure out how to get you out there - even if through me."

  "Um em, he ain't trying to get me out there."

  "Chile please - just remember what we been talking about. He going through puberty, look how he shot up over the summer. Ain't but one thing do that, growing pains and the releasing of hormones, the worst kind. Don't you think he ain't as horny as they come. You know what horny mean don't you?"

  "Mamaaa..." She whined, slapping her hands over her face embarrassed.

  "Mamaaa hell - you know what horny is?"

  Ma'Keiba did a mild fit with a "Tst." tongue against her teeth, "Mama why we always got to talk about stuff like that?" She protested slouching against the sink, continuing to clean the corn.

  "Because it's time! That's why! You at that age - you pretty as hell - body on you that's gone cause you some stress - me some stress, yo'daddy stress! And that boy across the way, cannot wait to get a hold of you. Ain't gone be long either, before other's'll be here, sniffin' after you the same. I have only one daughter, I be dammed if I'm gone let my guard down with you - I don't stay on top of you, one of them will be!"

  "Mama! I'm not like that!"

  "I sure hope not - because it will only bring you misery if you believe a word they say. Them boys just like your auntee Geraldine's puppy dog, you remember that dog, when it was a puppy, it was humping anything it could mount! Remember when it got on your leg."

  "Mama that's embarrassing," Ma'Keiba was making faces, feeling as if she were being tortured.

  "Maybe so, but boys like Shawn2 - that's what they are, lil'puppy dogs looking for something to hump on - they'll lock on you like that puppy did! That's why we ain't got no dog now, nasty ass thangs!"

  Ma'Keiba shook her head, rolling her eyes - only - because her mother wasn't looking, "Mama, but I know already, you done tol' me this a thousand times." She whimpered.

  "Gone tell you two thousand more! Any little break I give you, you bes' believe sista' - they'll be slipping in! I don't want no reason for you being foolish - you let one of them boys win, you gone end up feeling like the biggest fool there is, because they sho' gone run and tell - report it like it's the evening news!"

  Ma'Keiba thought any second now, she would scream! This was all because of Shawn2 showing is face over that fence, 'Damn fool!' - only way to get her mother to stop was tell her why she wasn't going to fall for it. "Mama it ain't gonna happen to me, because I know you right. I wanna be somebody, somebody you and daddy will be proud of - really mama, I know better."

  "Then why you let him come to this house when I leave for work, before your daddy get home?" She asked in that all knowing way that always threw Ma'Keiba for a loop. Her eyes opened wide, white showing all the way around - then back to normal - however not before her mother caught the expression on her face.

  Shelly leaned with her back to the counter so she could look her daughter in the face. She reached back, turned the running tap off and waited. Ma'Keiba looked down into the sink, unable to look at her mother - she'd been tempted to lie, but knew better.

  "Well?" Shelly pressed.

  Ma'Keiba took a deep breath, "Nothing happens mama."

  "So it's true?" Shelly asked for confirmation, only reason she considered it was because Shawn2 was bold, and he asked about her working, which meant he knew when she worked, and thus, would also know when Reginald worked and putting two and two together, she bluffed her - and won. Kids always thought sneaking, peaking and seeking only started with them - when in truth, the act had been going on since boys were boys and girls were girls.

  Ma'Keiba nodded her head and looked at her mother with big cow eyes, "Daddy know?"

  "No, just me." Shelly returned, glad she'd bluffed her.

  "Which one told you?" She was speaking of her little brothers.

  "Don't worry about that, just know that I know. Ma'Keiba, windows of opportunity, will always be. From now, until you go to school and while at school and every day until the time you reach adulthood, there will be windows of opportunity for you to have sex with a boy who is after you. Those windows are in place, to test you. All the A's B's in school, don't amount to shit - if you fail in the tests of life. Right now, you getting ready to go through the hardest time ever - because of inexperience and doubt - because of peer pressure and curios
ity. I love you so much, I wish I could help your through it, but you have to pass these life tests on your own. That's why I get on your nerves so bad - because I love you so much and I know - I know what's coming for you. Mama knows..."

  Shelly lifted away to peel potatoes, saying nothing more.

  Ma'Keiba stood a moment thinking, unsure, "Mama... you gone tell daddy?"

  "Nope."

  She stood a moment more, turned back to the sink, turned the water back on, to finish the corn, "Mama - you trust me?"

  "I want to, I'm scared to - but I'm gonna have to. Not even I have a right, to block you from those tests - but I have to prepare you for them - and then, the rest is up to you."

  Ma'Keiba stood cleaning more corn, thinking - she couldn't believe it. Her mother was just going to leave it alone - just - leave it to her, to handle Shawn2 - when they weren't home - she couldn't believe it. She stood stunned. A moment later, she rinsed all the corn and took them to the big pot that was boiling water for them, and lowered them in. Her mother was quiet now. She'd gone back out to check on the meat and then back in.