Now there is the girl I know and love.
Aayden beams up at me with an impish smile.
“No,” I disagree with underlying reprimand. “You’re marrying the perfect person.”
She sighs dreamily. “Davis is pretty great.” Aayden rolls his eyes.
“Yes, your perfect match,” I say in a hurry, ready to rush Nikkee out the door now that she’s in once piece.
Unexpectedly, she suddenly changes; her wistful mood turning melancholy.
“Nik?” I ask concerned.
She looks at me with gloomy eyes, “Everything is going to be different now.”
“How do you mean?” I question.
“It’s just, it’s always been you and me against the world, ya know, and now the dynamic is going to change.”
“It’s not going to be that different,” I try to reassure her. “I’m not going anywhere. So you’re married,” I wave. “You just have a bunch more diamonds now.” I try to joke in an effort to lift her spirits. This is supposed to be the happiest day of her life.
“That’s not what I mean.” She grips my hands abruptly and I’m taken by surprise.
“Do you think you and Justice will be here one day, getting married? Having a future?” She asks urgently.
Aayden slides his eyes up to me. My lips part slightly and I
glance frantically between them.
“I honestly don’t know.” And that’s the simple truth.
“Promise me,” she demands. “Promise me you’ll chase your happiness Liv, you deserve it.”
I am at a loss for words, where is this coming from? I stare at her blankly and she yanks my arm. “Promise.”
“I promise,” I stutter. “Good.”
Aayden stares at me with wide green eyes. I know what he’s thinking, heavy.
“You only have so much time,” she says imperatively.
Why the frig did she just say that? My heart drops dead in my chest.
Absolutely flabbergasted, I glance down at Aayden, he isn’t even registering I’m alive. He wants no part of that statement; he knows all too well the hang ups I have with the mortality issue. And now with the gypsy’s ominous warning, added stress swims vigorously within me.
This is all getting to be a little too much. I think the morning has finally taken its toll on Nikkee; I know it’s definitely taxed me. I once again take matters into my own hands. Literally. And give Nikkee a supernatural sedative.
“She’s right, you know, you deserve to be happy,” Aayden says as he stands up.
“I am happy,” I tell him.
Justice and I are together, and we are able to be together. What more do I need?
“Just as long as you’re sure,” he says with some reservation. I am.
***
We finally make it to the church. No catastrophes to speak of.
The guests are seated, the music is playing and the wedding procession is making its way down the aisle.
It is just me and Nikkee now, and her father.
The inner doors of the church are closed and we are standing, waiting for the last bridesmaid to make it to the altar. Nikkee’s eyes are large with fear as she holds on to her wrong bouquet for dear life.
“Everything will be fine, just breathe,” I tell her one last time and leave her with some calming energy. I descend down the aisle; close to four hundred eyes all on me. I can’t believe I am actually doing this. I can’t believe I am ingesting an all- consuming profusion of energy and actually keeping a smile on my face. I should be getting used to this; but I don’t think it will ever cease to amaze me how far I’ve come. This moment is what I prayed my entire life for. A chance. And now, I have it.
I catch Justice just as I get to the end of the isle; his face is stoic but his eyes are beaming. He knows just how much this means to me. I take my place on the altar across from where Davis and Kerri are standing.
Kerri smiling, Davis perspiring.
This is the moment of truth. I have made my pass over the threshold and now it is Nikkee’s turn. The music changes to Pachelbel's Canon and the church doors swing open. Gasps trickle out from the crowd as Nikkee’s glowing form materializes.
Life is about to change forever.
***
The ceremony was beautiful, and it went off without a hitch. Thank Jesus. All the pieces of the day are finally falling into place.
We have made it to the reception hall and are now standing outside the banquet room waiting to be announced.
Nikkee and Davis are radiant, and I can’t help but absorb some of their infectious energy. Deep down, Nikkee has always wanted this moment, right now. Recalling the numerous guys she has dated and dumped, I now realize she was searching for her counterpart and not just a stupid fling. Nikkee is so unique and
yet so very similar to me; she’s intuitive, and she can read people
well. Very well. She knew Davis was for her just as fast as I knew Justice was for me. The only difference is that she and Davis will live a long happy life together, while I will enjoy the short time I have with Justice and then have to move on.
I don’t know how I’ll do it.
Can I love him with all my heart and all my soul, and still one day let him go?
Will he be able to carry a little part of me around with him forever, while I rest in peace?
These are questions I just don’t have the answers to, but I will always ask them. I will always worry about them, about him.
As several of Davis’ cousins giddily huddle together by the ballroom door I catch glimpses of color and decor through its tiny crack. Nikkee has planned every aspect of this wedding right down to the minutest detail. Her theme is ‘love is in bloom’ and she designed the entire reception to look like a dramatic spring night in the park. The room is glowing with pink and magenta up lighting, which highlights the Beaux-Art architecture that made Nikkee fall in love with the venue to begin with. The centerpieces are tall, flowering branches of cherry blossoms adorned with crystal embellishments. The tables are draped with red sequined overlays; the napkin holders, chairs and charger plates are all a metallic gold. The combination, she told me, is supposed to make the room feel natural with a romantic softness. Even with just a
small peek, I can see she hit the mark.
It’s definitely a spring-tastic inspired dinner party.
As the DJ announces the wedding attendants one by one, my excitement grows. Pushing aside my ever present worries, I try to enjoy the moment. Truth be told, this is my first wedding, pathetic I know, but it makes the experience that much more exciting. After Kerri and I are announced, the lights in the room dim to a soft glow as all the attendants disperse from dance floor. Then the DJ broadcasts, “For the first time anywhere, Mr. and Mrs. Davis-Jonathan-Lee!” The whole room erupts into applause as strobe lights suddenly flash brightly celebrating the couple.
I find Justice standing by our table, he has the biggest smile in the room; that solar system sustaining smile that he usually reserves just for me. I guess weddings really do bring out the best in people.
The dance floor goes black as Davis escorts Nikkee into the middle of the room.
I grab Justice’s hand and hurry him to the edge of dance floor for a better look.
This is going to be good.
Softly, guitar strings strum in the darkness as a spotlight illuminates Nikkee and Davis first. Then the sweetest sound fills the air as a voice smoother than velvet belts out the loving words to their wedding song. I get tingles all over my body as Derrin comes into view. Dressed in black pants and a white button down
shirt open at the collar, he is huddled in the left corner of the
dance floor, sitting on a plain wooden stool with an acoustic guitar resting on his knee. Rockstar.
The two of them are genuinely surprised; I watch as Davis whispers what I can only imagine are words of love and adoration in Nikkee’s ear.
“What’s he doing here?” Justice murmurs sourly behind me.
“I called in a favor,” I grin stupidly, enveloped in the moment.
Davis has himself a singer, and trust me, a way better singer than anyone else on this earth. Derrin’s performance is a heavenly treat for everyone in this room.
He is totally mesmerizing.
I get totally swept away as I listen to Derrin belt out the beautiful lyrics of Train’s ‘Marry Me’. Resting against Justice, my back to his front, I watch my best friend glide around the dance floor, ridiculously happy.
Perspective. I need to remember it. It’s not next week, next month or next year that’s important. It’s right now. The tangible moment. I will keep reminding myself of that. Because right now is all I have, all I want. I squeeze Justice’s arm and brand this image into my head. Because for one brief second we have peace, we have perfection, we have each other.
By the time Derrin is done singing the entire room is spellbound; me included. I almost feel guilty, for a few short minutes no one noticed Nikkee and Davis were even there. Leave
it to a Seraph to inadvertently demand all of the attention in the
room. Luckily, Nikkee and Davis were so wrapped up in each other that they didn’t even realize.
Justice rocks me serenely, as Derrin finishes the tune, I almost think for one short second he is enjoying hearing him play.
“What is it about weddings?” Justice asks, shaking his head. “What is it about weddings what?” I repeat.
“What is it about a wedding that renews one’s sense of self?” I stare at Nikkee and Davis, their dance is almost over.
“I don’t know,” I contemplate. “Maybe the same thing that makes a magical flower that blooms every five hundred years so special.”
Justice slides his eyes down to me, as I slide mine up to meet his.
“It brings hope.”
The crowd claps, signaling the end of Nikkee and Davis’ wedding dance. Then fast music takes over the speakers. Justice glares down at me for a quick moment before twirling me out of his arms, and twisting me right back into him, the bottom of my dress moving in waves.
“What was that!?” I ask, legitimately shocked.
“Ready to get your dirty dancing on?” Justice asks with a gleam.
I can’t help the smile from spreading across my face. “Do you think you can keep up?”
“I think I can hold my own,” he glowers mischievously at me, repeating words once said.
We hit the dance floor hard.
The night starts to move along and before I know it, it is time for the speeches. Gulp. This is a moment I have been dreading. Justice notices the worry beading on my forehead.
“Relax,” he nudges me. “Everything is going to be fine. Just remember, speak from your heart, and picture everyone in their underwear.”
“That never works,” I say nervously.
“I can make Derrin project it for you if you want.”
I glance up at him. “No thanks.” I’d rather not see an entire room in their skivvies. Mirage or not.
I stand nervously next to Nikkee as Kerri gives his best man speech. It is sweet and funny and a little odd, as he is reading it off his Blackberry. But it works nonetheless.
Now, it’s my turn. My eyes slide over all the faces in the room, all several hundred guests. I grip my champagne flute for dear life, worrying I might break the glass right in my hand. I search out my family; they relax me a little, but not even close to enough. I start to read my speech with as much composure as I can: “How do you sum up thirteen years of friendship into a three minute speech?” but my feelings mixing with everyone else’s in the room is overwhelming, and I’m having trouble keeping the
energy at bay. I start to wheeze as the crushing force of emotional
commotion assails me. Attempting to be calm, I continue, but as I speak the air gets thinner and thinner; it feels like Siberian is choking me all over again. I gasp for breathe like an anaphylactic donkey.
I am beyond mortified.
The crowd looks on astonished as I make a complete fool of myself. I’m ruining the precious moment I was so desperate to make perfect. I need to pull it together! Pull. It. Together! I look over at my family, and Justice begging for support. The face my father is wearing is priceless. This is a catastrophe! Justice just keeps projecting a reassuring expression, but I know as soon as this is over he is going to lose it. He’s just that twisted. I stop speaking and suck in a few deep breaths. I need to focus. I push all the emotion out of my head and concentrate on a tall centerpiece in the middle of the room. Then I go on…
“Up until recently, my life was very complicated. Suffocating, lonely, oppressed. That’s not an easy person to befriend. But Nikkee never saw any of that, she was the one person who saw beyond my emotional turmoil. She saw the girl, the girl who just wanted to be normal, and fit in. And with Nikkee, I always did. So for that I thank you.” I glance over at her. “When you’re happy, I’m happy. When you’re sad, I’m sad,” I tell her, and the irony of that statement is not lost on her. “I will always cherish the memories we made, like when you accidentally dyed my hair
pink, or mistook Nair for body lotion,” I giggle. “And now, you
get to make great new memories with Davis. Someone who’s completely deserving of you.” I smile. “But if I’m being honest, I’m sort of pissed I have to share you,” I stifle a laugh, Nikkee returning the sentiment. I wipe away some traitor tears and finish before I become a blubbering mess. “So let’s raise our glasses. To Nikkee and Davis, love and laughter and happily ever after! Cheers!”
After I suck down the champagne, I hastily kiss Nikkee and Davis then make a beeline right for the bathroom, where, surprisingly Justice is waiting.
“How did I know you were going to end up here?” He asks with a knowing smile.
“You’re psychic,” I say sarcastically then try to barrel through the door.
“Oh no you don’t,” he grabs my arm and ushers me outside. We walk out onto the back patio of the banquet room and down the stairs to the pristine gardens; the place isn’t called The Ivy for nothing. As we walk down one of the footpaths, I can’t help but recoil in shame. That was horrible! I don’t ever want to face any of those people for the rest of my life! I made a complete fool out of myself. I am rambling all this in my head, but Justice seems to know exactly what I’m thinking.
“It wasn’t that bad,” he says. “Heartfelt, really.” “I was a mess!” I snap manically.
“You weren’t a mess, maybe a little wobbly at first. But in the end you had people tearing up. That’s a sign of a great speech.”
“Are you sure it wasn’t just me influencing the room?”
“No, I’m sure it was their own genuine emotion. If you were influencing the room, people would have been jumping to their death. You lean more towards sorrow and despair.” He rests his forehead to mine.
“Great. I thought I was past suicidal.”
“You most definitely are.” He pulls me into a hug. “But you’re not past homicidal,” he whispers menacingly.
“Look who’s talking, Mr. Murderous.” He eyes turn dark. “Damn right.” Scary.
“That was a onetime deal and I was desperate,” I stipulate. “Hey, I’m not judging, I love that you have such a dark side,”
he grins.
Angelic crust with devilish filling.
“I’m not so sure that’s a good thing.” I look up at him shamefully. “Evil is really seductive. If it weren’t for you half dying on the forest floor, I may have become the thing I destroyed.”
Justice’s expression turns serious. “Liv, listen to me.” He stares straight through my amethyst eyes. “Evil is a choice. You rejecting it had nothing to do with me. You chose to deny it all on
your own.” His voice strains. “Good is inside you, and that will never change.”
“How can you be so sure?” I ask bleakly.
“Because it’s the same for me.” He slides his hands down my arms. “The action may be questionable, but
the intent is always good.”
Even though his words are critical, he manages to make them sound reassuring. It puts some of my tension at ease.
“You think if you told Petra that, she’d believe you?” “Petra?” Justice repeats.
“Davis’ grandmother. I said the same thing when Nikkee told me her name.” I smile.
“Yes, and if she didn’t, I’d make her,” he leers. “Justice,” I tap his stomach lightly.
“Liv, your love, your remorse, your forgiveness is what sets you apart from anything evil. Demons are incapable of those feelings. Remember that and you’ll never doubt yourself.”
I stare up at my immortal, amazed that he is so many things. Angel, devil, hunter, solider, but my favorite part of him by far is his insightfulness. How does he always know the right thing to say?
I brush my lips lightly across his, accepting of his counsel. With a huge grin, he puts an arm around me, and we start to stroll back to the reception.
“You know what I’m still trying to figure out?” Justice asks, his tone light. “If I’m the world’s most dangerous predator, how is that you keep on saving me?”
I shrug. “You’re just lucky I guess,” I say with a smile. “Besides, I thought vampires were the world’s most dangerous predator?”
Justice scoffs. “Please, those pansies.” I can’t help but laugh out loud.
“Ready to get back in there so we can take advantage of the open bar? We’re wasting good drinking time.”
“After that pep-talk? I’m ready to take on the underworld.” “That’s what I like to hear,” he grins, lifting me up into his
Gravitational Pull (Vis Vires, book 2) (Vis Vires trilogy) Page 20