arms, planting a huge, happy kiss on my lips.
As we make our way hand in hand into the dimly lit ball room I’m met with a ridiculing remark.
“Well, well, the anaphylactic attendant returns,” Derrin says snidely.
“What are you still doing here?” Justice asks with the same malice. I wonder if these two will ever work out their differences. “I asked Nikkee if I could sing another song. She said she’d be
thrilled.” He smiles unashamed.
Lord have mercy.
Derrin’s Song
Justice takes my hand and leads me out onto the dance floor as Derrin warms up his guitar for his second song.
We are stopped abruptly as a small, older woman, dressed in a cream sequenced gown and immense energy cuts off our path. Petra. I squeeze Justice’s hand tightly as the stately woman regards me analytically. She’s not even discreet about it. It’s very uncomfortable.
Then Justice does something that surprises both me and Petra. He speaks Greek.
We both stare up at him, seeing he has a good foot on the two of us, then Petra answers him.
They have a short, intense conversation. Petra eyes me several times during it, as if Justice is trying to convince her of something. Hopefully he’s persuading her I’m not evil.
“Angelos,” she finally says, her eyes wondrous. Justice bends over so she can touch his cheek, then she looks over at me. She nods acceptingly, a ghost of a smile dancing on her lips. Then she walks away.
“Are you going to tell me what that was all about?” I ask with wide eyes, “And how come I didn’t know you spoke Greek?”
“One, I can speak every language. Even the most ancient Latin,” Justice tells me. “And two, I did what you asked. I convinced her you weren’t evil.”
“By telling her you were an angel?” “She figured that out on her own.” “How?”
“I just told her I didn’t know many demons that organized bridal showers, gave heartfelt speeches or recruited supreme beings to come to her grandson’s rescue. That’s when she realized I looked just like Derrin.”
“You totally played on her heart strings.” “Whatever works,” he shrugs.
I shake my head, amazed at this versatile being.
“Now if you’re satisfied,” Justice yanks at my hand. “There’s a dance waiting for us.”
Justice and I make our way onto the dance floor, uninterrupted this time. Derrin has finished tuning his guitar; my ears ache to hear him sing as my body tingles from Justice’s touch. It is sensation overload and I love it.
I wrap my arms around Justice’s neck, contently listening to the makeshift instrumental notes. Pulling my body close to his, I drink in my immortal; all GQ’d out in a light tan suit and salmon dress shirt. A swipe of color amidst a sea of black and grey attire.
I rest my cheek against his chest and watch the dance floor becomes jam packed as Derrin begins to croon. The melody is melancholy, yet undeniably beautiful.
“Did you have a good time tonight?” Justice asks, skimming his lips across my collarbone.
“I always have a good time when I’m with you,” I tell him, running my fingers through his dark hair. I can feel him smirk on my neck.
“That dress looks amazing on you,” he goes on, and as much as I want to get swept away in his adoring attention, I can’t help but imbibe the song lyrics circling around me. I want to ignore the words, but for some reason they invade me. On the surface they’re a beautiful tale, optimistic of lasting love, but the undertone plants doubt of torn hearts, fear, pain, and the inevitable end.
I hold on to Justice tightly, trying to suppress the panic that is slowly building within me.
Do you know what it’s like to have your head at war with your heart? I’ve received everything I wanted. I got Justice back, we finally have a physical relationship and I can now go back to building my life. But at the same time, emotionally, I feel like I’m right back where I started.
As my eyes pass over Derrin, it feels as if his every word is exposing the insecurities embedded in my life; and somehow he
knows it. Damn him. Furious emotion surges within me, and I am suddenly irate.
“Liv?” Justice pulls away from me. “What’s wrong?”
Enraged, I answer. “Derrin! That’s what’s wrong. Why would he sing such a depressing song!? It’s a wedding for god’s sake!”
“I sort of like it,” Justice confesses, confused by my outburst. “You would,” I snap, and storm off.
“Hey!” He grabs my arm on the outskirts of the dance floor. “What the hell has gotten into you?”
“Nothing, now let go!” I try to yank my arm back.
“Not a chance.” His hold gets tighter. “Talk to me,” he implores.
I stare up at Justice, so many doubts and worries and uncertainties pass through me. And I know, by touching me, he can feel everything I feel.
Should I just end this? End us now, and try to keep the unforeseeable peril and our inevitable future from tearing apart whatever’s left of our hearts?
“I…I…” I search for the words to express what I’m feeling.
To express the fear and dread rattling inside me.
Justice looks at me, puzzled, waiting for an explanation.
I am overcome by foreshadowing words, time runs short…this is your last chance…a decision must be made.
Time has always been my biggest fear, and now, it has been
declared, like a blunt force trauma, that it is running out.
“I’m scared,” I finally say vulnerably.
Justice’s confused look instantly turns to understanding; he draws me close, hugging me tightly in his arms.
“I know, baby,” he says acceptingly.
I lift my head from his shoulder. “What do you think she meant? And how does she know you?”
“I don’t know,” he shakes his head, “But whatever’s coming, we’ll face it together.”
“What if we can’t overcome it?” my voice is barely audible. “We will.” Justice says, certainty flashing in his eyes.
Justice pulls me back onto the dance floor, grasping onto the last seconds of Derrin’s song. He is cool and collected on the outside but a whirlwind of emotion on the inside. This discussion has been an elephant in the room for the last twenty four hours. I’ve avoided it for the sake of Nikkee’s wedding, and my sanity. I know Justice is scared too, more scared than I have ever felt him to be. And I know why. This danger is indeterminate. It’s not a threat he can track, or hunt, or fight, or kill. It’s a ghost. It will strike without warning, an unidentifiable danger he may not know how to defeat. We are both on the brink, desperately trying to hold it together for the sake of the other.
He lets out a ragged sigh and hugs me tightly. The music has stopped and we are the only two left on the dance floor. I can feel all eyes staring, but I don’t care.
Time is our enemy, so I am going to seize every second I can, clinging to the moments as they pass, fleeting quickly like a clock. I hold my immortal with transitory ignorance, pretending for just one second that the future is something to look forward to, and not a means to an end. I shudder when reality takes hold and clutch Justice tighter; he is the only person on this earth who makes me feel safe.
Earlier, Nikkee told me to chase my happiness; well she doesn’t have to worry, because I already caught it.
Holding on to it is going to be the challenge.
***
“I don’t think I told you how beautiful you look tonight,” Justice says, as we walk through the parking lot of the Ivy towards the Intimidator.
Some heavy breathing and three extremely large glasses of champagne later, I’m calm for the night.
“Thank you,” I say with our hands swinging. “I’m lucky Nikkee has amazing taste, you have no idea what I could have ended up in.”
Justice doesn’t quite understand my statement, so I feel compelled to explain.
“Bridesmaid’s dresses are usual
ly hideous. They get thrown in the back of a closet or in the trash once the wedding is over with.”
“That gruesome, huh?”
“Worse than Texas Chainsaw Massacre.”
One of his hands spreads across my back and over the sheen of the fabric. “It doesn’t matter what you’re wearing, just as long as it ends up on the floor tonight,” he says, as he opens the passenger side door of the truck. Then he scoops me up into the front seat, grabbing my ass in the process.
“I think I’ve created a monster.” I say tipsy.
Justice grins scandalously, “Not created, just awoken.”
“It’s whatever you want to call it, I just know I’m in trouble.” I return his expression.
“I think you like trouble,” he says brushing his lips by my ear, as he reaches around to click me in.
“Trouble is growing on me.” I catch his head in my hands just before he pulls away. I sweep my nose against his, then lick his bottom lip ever so lightly, just to be a tease.
“I’m nothing but trouble,” he says with a dangerous stare. My carnal needs just about convulse.
The car ride home is quiet. Not uncomfortably quiet, but a newfound tension lingers in the air. I glance over at Justice as he drives with his arm draped over the steering wheel. His long, lean
body is still, but the frenzy in his eyes worries me.
There are so many questions that have no answers. The only thing I can think to do is stick to my original plan, and live one indeterminable day at a time.
All the while begging fate to be kind.
Justice nearly attacks me once we are back at my apartment; his jacket, his tie, his shoes and socks seem to come off almost all at once. Someone’s excited.
There’s a rip and the sound of a surrendering zipper echoes around us.
“Justice!” I grasp the top of my dress before it falls heavily to the ground. “Do you think you can refrain from ripping apart every piece of clothing I own? I’m going to be reduced to walking around in my underwear soon.”
He smiles wickedly and his facial expression confirms what I suspect he’s thinking.
“I can’t help it,” he moans as he runs his hands over the torn fabric. “I don’t seem have any control when I’m around you. I can feel what I’m feeling and what you’re feeling all at the same time. It’s like sensory overload,” he growls. “And I’m totally addicted.”
I’m familiar with the allure.
I drop my now-tattered dress to the floor, taunt him with a kiss, then climb slowly into bed. Justice follows right behind me. I am now completely comfortable wearing nothing but sexy little
things around him. We each lie on a pillow facing each other. My
mouth half spilt from its ridiculous grin. The only thing that makes me feel better about it is the matching one on Justice’s face. Two grinning idiots. How did that happen?
He runs a finger through my limp bangs that are hiding my face. He tucks the strands behind my ear, leaving a trail of tingles on my skin. I’m positive I will never get tired of his touch.
“I have a confession,” he says lightly, and immediately my eyes dart to his. His confessions tend to send me into a tailspin.
“What?” I reply tentatively.
His smile widens. He’s enjoying this. Sick.
“I didn’t exactly tell you everything that happened that night at Solstice.”
I raise my eyebrows. “Oh? Are you telling me you left more gaping holes in the story?” I ask sarcastically. “How unlike you.” His eyes are hysterical now. He’s referring to the night he saved me from the Spirit Stalker, the night I don’t remember, the
night he compelled me to forget.
It always makes a little jumpy when he says he needs to confess.
“After we got back here, you weren’t exactly unconscious,” he says.
“Really? Do tell.”
“You were more demon-drugged. All stoned and spaced out,” he laughs to himself. “You were completely disoriented and
awkward in your own skin. Nothing like the girl I watched dance all night.”
Stalker.
“You started to wriggle out of your clothes, when you fell onto the bed with your pants tangled around your legs.”
“I can only imagine the perverse entertainment you got out of that,” I grimace.
“Not at all,” he feigns offense. “I decided to be a gentleman and help you out.”
“Did you now?”
“I kneeled down next to edge of the bed, and pulled your jeans off. And right before I stood back up you caught me with your gaze. You had such a strange, stabbing expression. It petrified me.” He rolls over onto his back and stares up at the ceiling. His eyes are wide and I’m sure if I touch him, I will feel every emotion he is recalling from that night. “You leaned over and touched my cheek, and with crazy vacant eyes you said ‘so sad’ in the most chilling voice I had ever heard, then you told me it wasn’t my fault.” He sucks in some air. “Everything changed for me after that. My entire existence. It’s like somehow you reached in and pulled the pin on my deepest, most suppressed emotions and detonated a grenade. It scared the living shit out of me.” He looks quickly between me and the ceiling. “I swiped your memory again after that. I didn’t want you remembering.” He
knits his eyebrows. “I didn’t want to remember.”
“So what changed exactly?”
He shrugs. “Me, I guess. Being around you? The whole dynamic of my life,” he speaks at the ceiling.
“Gravity.”
I stare at him affectionately, wholeheartedly understanding what it is he is trying to tell me.
We changed each other.
“That’s one hell of a gaping hole,” I joke, thinking it’s time to shift the mood in the room.
“Tell me about it.” He expels a hot breath between his lips, puffing his cheeks. “Like I said, you are the only person who can thrill me, scare me and make me question myself all at the same time.”
“I’m very talented,” I snicker.
“Yes you are,” he agrees. “You also make me blissfully happy.”
I pop my head up slightly. “Why Mr. Pasture, you stole my line.”
“Without thinking twice.” He smiles. “Devil,” I accuse.
“Yes,” he agrees. “Among other things.”
“I’m fully aware of your multiple personalities.”
“Oh ya? Which one is your favorite?” He rolls onto his side and rests his head into one hand.
“I love them all equally and in their own way,” I say suggestively.
Justice pulls me closer to him, laying his body half on top of mine.
I run my finger down his face, “You do, you know, make me blissfully happy.”
I look up at him, and I almost feel shy hearing my own words spoken out loud.
“It’s my mission in life,” he proclaims.
“I thought your mission was to rid the world of evil demons?” He shrugs nonchalantly. “That’s just my day job.”
I giggle. “I’m glad you can multitask.”
“You haven’t even seen multitasking yet,” he says with a playful smile, and then he attacks me, tickling me relentlessly, causing me to squeal in a fit of laughter.
***
Justice is shaking me, violently. “Liv for God’s sake, wake up!”
I open my eyes then scramble up, completely disoriented. I’m panting and my face is soaking wet. I run the tips of my fingers underneath my eyes; tears are streaming down my cheeks. Justice turns on the bed lamp and I squint from the light.
“Are you okay?” He asks, overly concerned and completely lost on how to help me.
But I can’t speak. I am overtaken with emotion. I’m confused. And for some reason I feel utterly alone, and unintelligibly heartbroken.
I stare into Justice’s worried eyes, and force a smile.
“Fine,” I respond in the most soothing and composed voice I can muster. “Really bad dream, I guess.”
/>
But I don’t remember dreaming.
He stares at me with a questioning look, but lets it go when I climb into his arms and snuggle against his chest.
“I just want to go back to sleep,” I murmur, and he gently strokes my hair. But sleep is the last thing I am going to do, because I’m haunted by a voice barely louder than a whisper. Repeating over and over: In this life, the next life, and any other life after that, I’m yours. I will always be yours. In this life, the next life, and any other life after that, I’m yours. I will always be yours. In this life, the next life, and any other life after that, I’m yours. I will always be yours…
Epilogue: Damage Control
Justice
I race up the staircase of the White Tulip, my legs not carrying me fast enough. I need to confront Liv and find out what she did that was so proactive. A wave of jealousy unleashes in me. I’m supposed to be the only person she does provocative things to.
At least I was supposed to be, until I utterly fucked everything up.
I’m just about to bang on her door when it swings open, and there she is.
Hello. My breath catches at the sight of her. “Going somewhere?” I ask.
Dressed like that?
An image of me pounding the shit out of Siberian pops into my head. He can’t have her.
“To find you,” she says seductively, and my muscles tense with want as I look her over in what I think is a dress that reveals way, way too much.
“I thought I told you to stay here.” I fold my arms over my chest, trying to look intimidating.
“Haven’t you learned, this place makes me defiant?” she says. I really don’t think it’s this place, it’s just you.
“I’ve learned life makes you defiant.” I feign annoyance.
Gravitational Pull (Vis Vires, book 2) (Vis Vires trilogy) Page 21