by S. Ann Cole
Sexually, things were off the charts—as I’d always suspected it would be with him. Chad could make me speak in languages that didn’t exist. He even topped my best-sex-ever ex, Tex. And Tex was damned hard to top.
Emotionally? Well, it was quite possible feelings were being forced. The raw, natural connection wasn’t there like it was with…him. But that was irrelevant. Real love isn’t something we fall into, it’s something we grow into. Right?
Right.
Weird enough, for the four months we’ve been together, I never once ran into Jahleel—not that I wanted to run into him, but they were best friends. Chad assured me all was well when I questioned if their friendship was still intact.
So, that was that.
At present, I was in Chad’s living room, bonding with Alina, eating Honey Nut Cheerios from the box, while he engaged in never-ending conference calls in his office. He did that sometimes, stayed wrapped up in phone calls that went on for hours.
Alina was watching some new adult crap show on T.V. while she filed her nails with a bright pink nail file in her LOVE PINK pyjama set and pink toenails. Typical teenager.
She stopped filing her nails and breathed out a dreamy sigh, “Ian Somerhalder is sooooooo hot.”
My eyes rolled. “What is it with you girls and this bloke? I don’t get it.”
Alina gaped at me in horror, as if I were some monstrous creature about to eat her alive. “You can’t be serious.”
Popping a handful of Cheerios in my mouth, I spoke around them, “I mean, sure, he’s undeniably good-looking in the face. Striking even. That jawline, wow. But he’s short, and puny, and probably couldn’t lift up a woman who weighs over a hundred pounds without farting or shitting himself.”
Alina snickered.
“Now if you’re talking about a real man,” I went on, “hot both in looks and body build, you’re talking men like Henry Cavill.”
Alina scoffed. “You’re just bias because he’s British.”
“Maybe,” I said around another mouthful of Cheerios. “But what about Chris and Liam Hemsworth? Now those are men.”
“Oh yeah,” Alina agreed in a swoony voice. “I’d definitely want Liam to lift me up in those long, strong arms.”
I grinned at her, then glanced around to see if Chad was anywhere nearby to overhear us. He was strict with his staff and especially Alina, and I knew this was a conversation he wouldn’t want me having with his cousin. “You have a boyfriend, Alina?”
She resumed filing her nails and remained silent for a long while before answering. “Guys are afraid to date me.”
“What? Why?”
Alina shrugged, but it was a shrug that told me she couldn’t, or shouldn’t talk about it.
“But there’s someone at school you have a crush on, right?”
It wasn’t normal for a girl her age to not have a crush. Or at least sneaking around with someone.
“Not at school,” she spared. “Guys my age repulse me. They’re brainless idiots. Think they can tell me anything and I’ll drop my panties for them. They’re hairless, muscle-less, half-brained fucknuts—sorry for swearing.”
I laughed as I stuffed more Cheerios in. I seriously loved the fuck out of her and contemplated kidnapping her and moving her in with me, what with Ferbie and Timber all on their own now. “Oh. I was worried for a minute there. Thought you were some abnormal weirdo.”
She giggled, then fell silent, leaving me no choice but to watch the pointless vampire crap on T.V. Until she whispered, “JK.”
Wondering if I heard her right, I shot her a side long glance. “What’s that?”
She kept her voice in a quiet hush, “Cousin’s best friend. He’s my crush.”
Oh. “Oh.”
“You should see him,” she gushed, eyes twinkling. “He’s so freaking hot. He has tattoos and his hair is, like, long and perfect. And his eyes, oh God…you should really see him.”
Trust me, I’ve seen him. And felt him. Fingers, tongue and cock.
“Oh, wait!” she said, snapping her fingers.
Uncrossing her legs, she leaned to the side to lift up the sofa cushion, pulling out a magazine hidden beneath it and handed it to me.
GQ.
And who was on its cover?
JK.
In all his panty-burning glory. How on earth did he land this one? Lion, no doubt.
Jahleel was a ball of steam, smoke and testosterone on the cover, in well-faded jeans with rips in both knees, no belt holding up his jeans, leaving it to hang tantalizingly, illegally, temptingly, dangerously low on his hips, showing off that V.
Oh, for the love of all things perilously sinful…
With that, he wore just a black biker jacket, no shirt beneath, leaving his glorious abs and pecs on display, designed to drive women right out of their minds, burning holes in their knickers. He had his asshole face on—fierce, no hostages—gold eyes mesmerizing, lips parted, both hands raking back through his hair which had grown a descent length past his shoulders.
Swallowing past the giant lump in my throat, I handed the magazine back to Alina. “Does he feel the same?”
Her eyes widened, staring at me as if I just asked her the world’s dumbest question. “God, no! He can’t know. Did you not hear me say he’s Cousin’s best friend? If he knew I had a crush on him, it would most likely make him uncomfortable and he would stop coming around. I sure don’t want that to happen.”
Alina was a lot smarter than she appeared. She was definitely from Chad’s lineage. “He comes here? Huh. Strange, I’ve never seen him here.”
“You know how private Cousin is. Whenever JK stops by, it’s either before you come here or after you leave,” she informed me. “I guess Cousin plans it that way.”
Seemed Chad was sparing us from awkwardly running into each other. Good thinking.
Just as I was about to bombard her with more questions, Chad sauntered into the room. Tall and sexy, in nothing but a silk, champagne-coloured pyjama bottom, the dragon tattoo tail on his back wrapped around his left side, the tip disappearing just beneath the waist band.
This ridiculously scrumptious man was mine, and mine alone.
His presence shifted the energy of the room in a major way, and he looked to Alina. “Can I steal her for a bit?”
Alina rolled her eyes as she stood up, deftly hiding the magazine behind her back. “All yours, Cousin. I was just heading off to bed, anyway.”
Chad watched her retreat from the room, then without warning, he lunged at me, scooping me up from the sofa, throwing me over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes, and raced off to his bedroom.
At the sudden and unexpected action, I squealed.
Chad smacked my bum. “Stop being such a girl.”
“I am a girl, caveman!”
Entering his bedroom, he kicked the door shut and threw me down on the bed. His weight was on me next, tongue plunging into my mouth, rubbing against mine.
When we parted for air, he husked out, “I missed you.”
“You’re the one who thought work was more important than me.”
“Ah,” he hummed, tracing the curves of my lips with the tip of his tongue. “I had the television muted on Late Nite with Dee Jones while in the middle of a conference call. This gorgeous dark-haired beauty walked out on stage to perform, provocatively dressed, with a riot of stubborn raven curls billowing around her. Her smile, like sunshine. Her voice, like an angel’s. Her legs, to murder cold-blooded for. And there I was, deaf to the conference call, thinking, ‘Fuck, she’s fucking hot.’ My cock hardened as I swore, ‘I’d give anything to have her inner thighs pressed on either side of my face, to have her clit on my tongue.’”
He tore my top off.
“Then it hit me. I can.” He trailed slow kisses down my neck, down my stomach, hooking his thumbs in the sides of my shorts and knickers, peeling them off in one go. “Because that fiery hot, raven-haired minx is only a room away…waiting for me.”
Pushing my legs further apart, he sprinkled pepper hot kisses along my inner thighs then stopped where I was aching for him, wet for him, impatient. “So, what do I have to give to have her?”
Fighting to speak through ragged breaths, I said, “Nothing. I just want you…your tongue…on me.”
A swear word, a groan, and then his tongue was on me.
Chad and I, the following night, with much time on our hands, attempted to bake a cake for Alina who had passed her End of Term exams with bright red A’s. The cake was Chad’s idea, because I would’ve just ordered one.
We had no idea what we were doing. But the fun part was in trying. I could cook well, but was inept in the baking department. Chad had no culinary skills whatsoever. All we did was laugh and make a mess of the kitchen like two idle teenagers. Flour everywhere, all over us.
When we got bored with it, Chad set me up on the counter top, standing between my thighs with the bowl of batter between us. We dipped in, licking the batter from each other’s fingers, forgetting completely that the cake was supposed to be for Alina.
As Chad brought my chocolate covered index finger to his mouth, sucking and licking it clean, I heard the elevator doors open. Alina had been out, so I knew it was her returning.
Except, she wasn’t alone.
“Stop teasing, JK!” she whined, in a voice that had an underlying ‘tease me, tease me, please don’t stop teasing me’ tone. “I so hate you right now. Like, totally abhor you.”
“And I think you’re an adorable nerd. Straight A’s, Ally?” Jahleel’s voice teased. “Seriously, who uses the word ‘abhor’ anymore? Oh, that’s right, nerds.”
Both Chad and I froze, listening to Alina and Jahleel bicker, their voices getting closer and closer to the kitchen.
Chad looked at me, suddenly disconcerted and uneasy. “I, uh—do you want to go to the bedroom until he’s gone,” he asked quickly. “I’m sure you won’t feel comfortable seeing him.”
Knowing it wouldn’t do me well to see Jahleel in person, now or anytime in the future, I nodded and set the bowl aside.
But it was too late.
As Chad placed his hands on my waist to help me down from the kitchen counter, Alina breezed into the kitchen with Jahleel dragging in behind her. His head was down as he typed on his cellphone.
The next second, my cellphone vibrated on the kitchen counter, but too much was happening in the moment to check it.
Alina stopped when she saw me, and her eyes widened in fear. She was so afraid of Chad and I was yet to understand why.
“Oh my God, Cousin. I’m so sorry,” she rushed out. “I didn’t know she was here.”
But Chad said nothing, staring guiltily at Jahleel, who, at Alina’s sudden rush of apology, turned his attention from his cellphone and glanced up. Saw us.
Chad, shirtless and worn jeans. Me, in a sports bra and Chad’s boxers. Sitting on the countertop with my legs apart, Chad wedged between them.
For about a million minutes, there was nothing but intense silence.
Jahleel glared at Chad, never at me. Myriads of painful expressions flitted across his face, betrayal more prominent.
Chad looked away first, and no one uttered a word.
My brain ceased sending out messages to my organs the second my eyes landed on Jahleel. My heart, I heard it crack again. My eyes, they burned with forced-back tears. My hands, they shook with the need to touch him. If only with just the tips of my fingers.
He was Jahleel Kingston. He was everything. He was my happiness, my meaning, and my purpose. He owned me. Body. Mind. Soul.
Just one sight of him, one, and every piece of fake happiness I’d carefully manufactured, shattered. Into a billion tiny pieces. None of it was real. He was my real. I loved him. I never stopped.
I needed…I just needed to touch him.
Jahleel began backing out of the kitchen, while nodding his head and repeating, “Okay…okay…okay…okay…okay…” And without sparing me a single glance, he turned and walked away.
Confused, Alina looked between us and stuttered, “W-wha-what’s going on?”
Before anyone could answer, Jahleel stormed back into the kitchen, temples flaming red. “You know what, it’s not fuckin’ okay.”
Faster than anyone could react, he slammed his fist into Chad’s face. Chad’s head bobbed back at the unexpected attack.
Alina let out a little scream, while I sat there, unable to move.
Chad moved back a step and wiped his mouth. Staring at the blood smear on his hand, he said, “I’m not gonna fight you, JK.”
At ‘JK’, Jahleel punched him again. “Nah, fight me, Chadrick. C’mon, man. You’re good for it. You got a Red Belt, don’t you? I’m not afraid to lose. I’ll take a beat down and lose like a fuckin’ man. C’mon. Fuckin’ fight me!”
Chad blinked, that second hit rattled him a bit. Still, he refused to fight. “I won’t. You’re my frien—”
Jahleel moved in and chucked him hard, hissing, “You got no business using that word. You’re no fuckin’ friend.”
When Chad didn’t react, he began backing out of the kitchen again. But something caught his eye, and his gaze snapped in my direction—well, to my feet, which were covered in red socks.
He froze for a bit and stared at my feet, until he turned suddenly and swept a long muscular arm across the counter. Cake batter, sugar jar, flour jar, all the utensils we’d used clattered, crashed, or splintered to the floor.
Damage done, he stormed out without another word.
Alina bolted after him, calling for him to stop. “JK!”
Inert, speechless, I listened for the sound of the elevator doors. When they finally opened and closed, I looked to a bloody-lipped Chad, who wore a contrite expression.
Then it hit me…”You never told him, did you?”
The expression on Jahleel’s face just now, he couldn’t have known Chad and I were together. He’d avoided looking at me. Glaring only at Chad, accusing him. He’d had no idea his best friend was dating his ex.
Chad’s non-answer to my question verified as much.
“Why?” I demanded. “Why would you hide it—us from him?”
“Because I didn’t want to see that look on his face.” Stepping back from me, he raised his eyes to my face. “And I didn’t want to see this look on yours.”
There were no words I could convincingly use to deny still having feelings for Jahleel, and Chad watched me closely as he waited to hear something, even a squeak of denial.
When a few minutes passed and I said nothing, he shoved a hand through his hair, turned and left the kitchen, leaving me alone, heart splattered in my chest like the cake batter on the floor tile.
Hopping off the counter, I scooped up my cellphone, and right there on the screen, was the text message he sent a mere second before he caught me with his best friend:
I want it all back…
Chad disappeared into the depths of his house for the rest of the evening. I didn’t know where he was, and I didn’t search for him.
It wasn’t until around midnight, while I was lying in his bed staring off into space, that the bedroom door opened, a flood of light from the hall spilling into the darkness of the room, and Chad’s silhouette filled the door frame.
He moved, walking up to the nightstand to switch on the lamp, and looked down at me in utter bewilderment.
“You’re still here…” he mused.
As he sat down on the edge of the bed, I flipped onto my side. “You want me to leave?”
“No, I…” He stopped, ran a hand down his face. “I thought you’d—”
“Go after him?”
“I’m…it’s just that…he never fights. He’s not a fighter. Walking away with a shrug is more his style. Yeah, back when we just became friends, I taught him how to fight. I trained him. But he still wasn’t the one to push fights. Never. He…he knows I can kill him instantly with my bare hands, yet he punched me, provoked me. Twice.”
I
nstantly? Bare hands? And why did his voice sound so…scary?
“Really? You can do that?”
Chad gave me an odd glance, wary, as though he’d revealed too much. “That’s beside the point.”
On a sigh, I sat up and scooted over to him, wrapping around him, one arm over his shoulder, the other around his torso. I kissed along a Russian inscription on his shoulder blade. “I’m with you, Chad. It doesn’t matter what I feel—felt for him. None of it matters. You matter. To me. I want to be with you. I want to be yours. So, I’m here.”
Chad said nothing in return. What sucked the most was that he was utterly unreadable. I could never tell which Chad was with me, the suave Chad or the power-holder Chad.
I sprinkled kisses along his shoulder, up the side of his neck, and waited for him to speak to me.
“You never told me what happened with you two,” he said finally.
“You never asked.”
“What happened?”
“Why do you want to know now?”
He turned and faced me full on. “Because I need to know if what he did to you was so bad, you’d never…put yourself in a position like that again.”
He needed assurance I’d never leave him for Jahleel.
“He decidedly cheated. In front of me,” I divulged, ignoring the ginormous pain that jabbed me just by saying those words. “He chose her.”
Chad didn’t question who ‘her’ was. Anyone who knew Jahleel, knew who I spoke of.
He sighed, and I wasn’t sure if it was a good sigh or a bad one. Was that enough to appease him or not?
Tipping his head to the side, he leaned in and kissed me. I curled my fingers in his hair and pulled him in.
We fell back on the bed in a feverish heap.
The answer came two months later.
Heading back to my hotel from a press conference in Australia, I was starved and knackered. As my team and I stepped inside the lobby, Chad materialized in front of me. Impeccably dressed in a crisp, well-fitted black suit.
Six months ago, I would’ve been surprised to see him here, popping up at a location I gave no hint I’d be at. The first three times he did it, I demanded to know how he knew my schedule and he flat-out refused to tell me, so I stopped asking. The man was simply an enigma.