Letters to Ebay
Page 4
This bird feeder/planter/candle holder is perfect for outdoor and patio design. It comes ready to hang and has a clever design to go with its functional capabilities. This piece is beautiful and would make a fine gift for a neighbor or close friend.
This bird feeder is 10" tall (standing) and the overhang hood measures 10" diameter.
Hello! Like most good-hearted country folk, my wife, Eunice, and I enjoy sitting on our porch at night, drinking piping hot cocoa in the winter or freshly squeezed lemonade in the summer. Eunice usually coaxes me to play a tune or two on my Hohner American Ace harmonica. She loves “Oh Susanna” and “She’ll Be Coming Around the Mountain” and has been known to break out in a little jig every so often. (I’ve caught that dirty-bird Larry Buckhalter across the street with binoculars on more than one occasion.) We love watching birds grace our humble porch and are looking for a new bird feeder after a wayward broom handle broke our last one. We’re looking for one that we could fill with alcohol. Eunice can sure make me laugh when she’s a bit tipsy at weddings and we think that drunken birds would be an absolute hoot to watch! How fun would it be to see birds get crazy and nuts? Would your bird feeder be able to hold liquids or just solid food? Would they be able to put their tiny beaks in and drink the stuff? Thank you.
Art
We certainly don’t recommend the bird feeders as objects to distribute alcohol to birds since there is no real age of consent established for birds. We would be remiss to recommend such a use without discernment. Could the tray support a shot or two of magic elixir? Sure it could. Beware though because such influences may send your birds into a crazed tizzy causing them to attempt to catch breezes that don’t exist and to crash into windows and fly into open houses. While that might prove to be entertaining for Eunice’s fun-loving spirit, it could prove a hazard as well, so we recommend caution and will leave the final decision to you.
And don’t give ol Larry such a hard time. I’m sure Eunice is quite a treasure on the eyes and seeing her delight to the tune of your skilled mouth organ melodies is enough to conjure up the boyhood desires of even the most innocent of men.
Boys will be boys… should be no harm if he’s only peeking.
Hope you find our bird feeder meets your needs, and if not, it was a pleasure to have you stop by.
Old Catcher’s Mitt Bill Dickey Vintage
Old catcher’s mitt for the left hand. It is embossed with Bill Dickey’s signature. The glove is also stamped “Cowhide” and “Sporting Marathon Goods.” It’s in nice shape — no rips or tears in the leather. The leather lacing is complete. There is some nonvisible fraying of the wrist lining. The glove was apparently owned by a ball player named “Mike” who printed his name on the backside 3 times in ink. The ink has faded over the passing years. The dimensions of the glove are 11"X10".
Greetings! My wife and I are expecting our first child in December and can’t be any more ecstatic! My wife, Norma, and I are well versed in the ways of early American settlers and love to play the part. We make butter from scratch, have no microwave (invented by Lucifer himself) and have chosen to have a natural birth. Believe it or not, I’m a former Junior College catcher and my love for the glove still abounds. My wife has agreed to a silly dream of mine. When little Willy is birthed I will be squatting near Norma’s you-know-what with full catcher’s garb on. Mask, chest protector, shin guards, and of course a cup complete with athletic supporter. I will signal for a fastball and BOOM! little Willy will squirt out into the world and into my glove. Somehow, my trusty catcher’s glove has been misplaced. I am looking for a new one to purchase on eBay. Do you believe your fine catcher’s mitt will be able to catch little Willy? Would it absorb all the “junk” that comes with him?
Art
If little Willie doesn’t throw you a curve, and assuming there is not too much spin, I believe the Bill Dickey Glove is up to the task! Your primary challenge will be to distinguish little Willie from that junk accompanying him.
5 Rolls of Colored Duct Tape, Pack, Mend, Repair, Tools
Here are five rolls of quality duct tape in four different colors. If you are tired of being teased about silver tape, this is the answer. It comes in tan, white, navy, and black and I will throw in a second of one of these colors; one (or more) of each color is included in this sale. It was made in the USA!
Each roll contains 10 yards of 2" tape for a total of 50 yards of sticky tape. This will fix almost anything that is broke—ha. And the best part is that it will match the decor.
Hello! I am a self-employed bumper sticker creator. Perhaps you’ve seen some of my creations plastered on car bumpers. I’ve come up with such popular catch phrases as “My Grandkids Barfed on Your Grandkids,” “Happiness Is Kicking Your Dog” and “John Kerry: Why the Long Face?” Production costs have become too high as of late and an idea recently popped into my head. Why can’t I simply purchase rolls and rolls of duct tape and write my critically acclaimed catch phrases on 10-inch strips of duct tape with a black pen? This would cut my supply costs by 87%. Imagine a customer proudly displaying his newly applied duct tape bumper sticker with the phrase “Save the Owls: Poach an Eagle Instead.” I think this would not only be aesthetically pleasing to the eye but would be environmentally conscious as well. How long do you think your duct tape will stay stuck on a car bumper? When would the edges start to peel off? After two months? A year? Thank you.
Art
An interesting concept but don’t most people associate duct tape to rednecks? Regardless, I am not sure how long they would last on bumpers. I have a hunch the tape would outlast the message. I lived in AZ for years and duct tape is a household thing; it held canopy windows in for 2–3 years before giving out. Now I am in WA and I think the rain would wash the tape clean in a short time. All I can recommend: TRY SOME. If it works, maybe we can make a deal on a mass quantity.
Lot 15 Bath & Body Works Hand Soaps All Scents!
Up for bid is a huge lot of 15 brand-new never been used bottles of Bath & Body Works Moisturizing Hand Soap.
This is a $75.00 Value!
I have just about every scent, so I am allowing the winner to individualize this auction by choosing the scents he or she wants! -OR- you could have fun and let me pick the scents!
Thank you, thank you! A quick story before my questions. My left hand was taken from me in a childhood accident when I was a mere nine years old. My older brother, Andrew, was conducting an experiment with a model airplane, a stick of butter and a chain saw (doomed to say the least). I have endured many obstacles in life and one of my only solaces is the warm feeling of bath water upon my stub. (I’ve nicknamed him Slappy.) You state in your description of your item that it is “hand” soap and not “hands” soap. Not too many companies specialize in items only made for “hand.” Usually such items are made for people that have both hands. (I call them BHPs, I sometimes spit on them.) So, you can imagine my excitement when I came upon your item. My questions: Will Slappy be able to push down on the top to dispense or could it hurt him? Are the contents easy to replace, say, with goat’s milk? Slappy loves goat’s milk. I type pretty good with one hand, don’t I? Thank you for your time.
Art
You have a great personality, and you type amazingly well for a person with only one hand! The contents of the bottles are easy to replace when empty, the top just unscrews. Also, I think it would be OK for Slappy to dispense, but I don’t have any experience in that, nor do I know anyone with one hand, so I have no one to ask. They seem relatively easy to pump, and if you can pump other things, like lotion, etc., I don’t think you would have a problem with it. Or you could just use your hand, no? Thank you for inquiry and have a wonderful day!
3m Jumbo Lint Roller!
20 pack of Lint Rollers!
3MJUMBO
LINT ROLLERS
ULTRA TACK ADHESIVE
Made with SCOTCH Brand Adhesive
* * * * * * * *
You are Bidding on 20 Lint Rollers!
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br /> * * * * * * * *
These are not just the refills.
Each roll has its own handle.
Each JUMBO roll is 4 inches wide and 39 feet long and has 70 sheets so they are 25% more than the traditional 3M roll only having 58 sheets. You get 20 of them!
The total length of your 20 rollers is 760 feet and have 1400 sheets that can be torn off to renew the ultra tacky surface for a renewed lint pickup.
These lint rollers are compact and great for using anywhere you go. They can be used at home to remove pet hair and lint from clothes or upholstery, even automobile upholstery. They are great when you are traveling.
Greetings! Your fabulous jumbo lint rollers could be a godsend for my family. You see, our pet porcupine, Maria, has a nasty hankerin’ for shedding her quills all over our house. We legally adopted Maria after we found her shivering in an alley eating day-old maple bars. Despite her blunt-nosed face, long curved claws, and razor-sharp barbs, she has become a fine pet. Our nine-year-old daughter, Elva, has grown quite fond of Maria and recently knitted her a lovely country style sweater. Our vertically cross-eyed son, Jasper, often spoon-feeds her Lucky Charms cereal. In the past we have picked up her fallen quills with an old-fashioned “pooper-scooper.” How durable and effective are your jumbo rollers? Maria often sheds 2-inch-long clumps on top of our NASCAR rug. Simply put, do you believe the ultra tack adhesive would be able to pick up a porcupine’s quills or would they not stick at all? Thank you.
Art
Art,
I have spent hours reading over the 3M specification sheets for the lint rollers. Unfortunately, there is no mention of porcupine quills. The 3M Jumbo Lint Rollers do a terrific job picking up pine needles. Pine needles are long and have sharp ends, but being such a distant cousin of the porcupine quill is probably not a good reference point.
The major concern with using the Jumbo Rollers to pick up the quills is not the rollers’ ability to do so, but the damage to the roller operator’s hand while those sharp quills whip around the roller, slashing the user’s hand.
Due to this potential hazard, it is not relevant if the roller will or will not pick up the quills. We simply do not have a large enough area on the roller to print the eighteen line (12 point font) warning label that would be necessary to endorse the cleanup of quills with this product.
By the way, our research shows that porcupines do not shed their quills, only their hair. The 3M Jumbo Lint Rollers will work great for that!
Lot of 60 Tennis Balls—great dog toys!!!!!!!!!!!!
Up for bid we have this box of slightly used tennis balls, mainly Wilson and Penn. These make the absolute greatest dog toys money can buy. They are also great for walker tips, furniture legs, kids’ baseball or whatever else you can think of. This is a box of 60 tennis balls.
Hello! Starting on August 9 I am opening up a summer sports camp for kids aged 4–8 and have a few questions about your tennis balls. My camp is an answer to all of today’s political correctness that shrouds our youth sports programs in darkness. They are a breeding ground for sissies. My camp teaches mental and physical toughness and what it takes to succeed not only on the athletic field but also in the game of life. Here are the four laws of my camp: 1. Only winners get ice cream. 2. We’re only as good as our weakest player. 3. Always listen to the parents’ yelling (parents ALWAYS know more than you). 4. Losing is for girls. Camp members will recite the laws three times a day. There’s a game we play called “Death Ball” where we need balls that have a high bouncing range. How tight are your tennis balls? If they were launched from atop a 40-foot scaffold, how high would they bounce off pavement? How about off a small child? Thank you.
Art
Art,
I’m really proud of you for doing what you are doing for the youth in your area. As for your questions, How tight are your tennis balls? If they were launched from atop a 40-foot scaffold? How high would they bounce off pavement? How about off a small child? I have absolutely no way of answering these questions. I am 59 years old and I am not going to climb atop a 40-foot scaffold to see how high the balls bounce off pavement, as I am sure I wouldn’t bounce at all when I fell. These are very simply used tennis balls. I bought too many for toys for my dogs and am trying to re-sell a lot of them at a loss. That’s the best information I can give you. Is this a joke or what???
Lot of 5 Sets Rubber Stamps, All Occasion, Wedding, Etc
This is a lot of 5 sets of rubber stamps. All have been gently used. There is some ink on the front of the all occasion stamps, looks like my daughter scribbled a little. Takes nothing away from using or seeing the label of the stamp. There is a wedding set, can also be used for anniversary. There is another set of 4 stamps that has a beach theme, a Christmas theme, a butterfly theme, and a baby theme. There is a set that is one stamp 5x7 with a block border. There is a set of 4 stamps with a cute angel theme w/a scripture saying “thou hast put gladness in my heart,” Psalms 4:7, and the last set contains 8 all occasion stamps which are as follows: 1) hello 2) best wishes 3) happy birthday 4) welcome baby 5) to someone special 6) miss you 7) thinking of you 8) thank you.
I forgot to mention that all stamps have initials on the side of them. A wonderful group of us get together and stamp and we found it was the only way to keep our stamps from getting confused.
Greetings! As an innovative fifth grade teacher who incorporates shame (an under-rated emotion) into his curriculum, I have a wonderful idea that would promote learning. Inspired by the book The Scarlet Letter, when a child performs poorly on a test, acts out in class or forgets their homework, I will brand them with a mark upon their forehead. I have chosen to use rubber stamps as my tool. For example, if Jack Falls (class bully) receives a 43% on a math test I will stamp the words “Math Failure” on his forehead for the entire school to see. Shame can be very effective with young children. The other students will shun the offender and therefore will cause him or her to study harder. Parents agree. I have written an article for submission on this subject to Teaching Matters magazine. How easy will your rubber stamps glide on a student’s forehead? Will the ink fade away in 2 or 3 days? Do you have the word “Loser” on a rubber stamp? Thank you. Your stamps could help an entire generation learn.
Art
Shame is a funny thing. What if you hugged that bully and told him that he mattered and took a different approach? It is funny what affection does in place of humility. Since I don’t have a loser stamp nor is ink for sale in this transaction, I hardly see how my poor stamps could be of help. Best wishes on your shame tactics, I am a get-them-with-kindness person!!!
24 Glass Test Tube 15 × 150mm heat resistant and bonus
This is an auction for 60 small test tube Stainless Caps—Size 13—1.5cm diameter. Brand new.
Greetings! While watching a rerun ofCharles in Charge starring Scott Baio an idea popped into my head. I don’t get out of the house much but love to experiment and mix chemicals in my basement. Using a combination of melted deodorant, hydroxy ethyl cellulose extract from hair gel, and cheap cologne with a dash of Tellurium (Te) just for kicks, I wish to create a new cologne for men entitled BAIO! I believe those elements would re-create the vibrant smell of the real life Chachi. I once stood behind him in line at a Redondo Beach Starbucks in 2004 and remember his distinct musky smell like it was just yesterday. I believe everyone will want to wear and smell like BAIO! in the future. I am looking for test tubes on eBay to help store my BAIO! concoctions. Could your test tubes withstand my ingredients heated to over 300 degrees Fahrenheit? How about sub-zero temps? Would the atomic weight of the Tellurium (Te) shatter the tubes? Thank you.
Art
Hello,
I’m so out of touch I’m not sure who this celebrity is. Can you even get Tellurium or any of its compounds?
Tellurium compounds are considered amongst the worst smelling compounds in the universe. Much worse than sulfur or phosphorous. I’m an organophosphate chemist, and I make a lot of sulfur derivatives. I h
ave never smelled a tellurium compound but I have heard (and believe) this story.
A German chemist made some alkyltelurium compound in the late 1800’s and was on a train when it fell out of his pocket. No matter what was done, the stink was so bad they had to abandon the entire coach forever. I got that story from The Emperor of Scent, which is a great book. I also suggest The Chemistry of Fragrances compiled by David H. Pybus and Charles S. Sell.
Cymbal Mallets—“For All Drum Set Players Stick Bag”
1 pr. Cymbal Mallets
Yarn Wound (White for Visibility) Rubber Core, 1/2" birch handles. More durable than felt mallets.
About Smith Mallets: 20 years ago I began making mallets while in college for myself as a hobby and also because name brand mallets are so very expensive. After a short time my fellow percussionist friends wanted me to make mallets for them which led to the start of "Smith Mallets." My business was marketed solely by word-of-mouth and in time the mallets made their way into the hands of students at many colleges and universities all over the country.
Greetings! Ever since I heard the catchy tune “Dr. Feel-good” by Mötley Crüe, I have been a huge fan of drummer Tommy Lee. The rhythm and syncopation he lays down is unmatched in the rock and roll world. Tommy is the king of drummers! Despite his bad boy reputation he is still a leader in his community as evidenced by his return to college and involvement with the inner city youth. He makes kites and peanut brittle for them. I am planning a tribute to Tommy by recording myself drumming on turtle shells. My uncle, Herman, runs a turtle farm and has graciously donated eight turtles to my project (loosely titled Hell on Shells). There’s a tiny turtle named Gerry who will be my hi-hat. His father, Roger, is serving as the bass drum. After each session they will be rewarded with 3 heads of lettuce each. NO TURTLES WILL BE HARMED IN MY EVENT. Naturally, their shells are hard. Do you believe your great drumsticks will break upon impact? How many hits until the sticks start to wear down?