Beth looked her up and down. “Well, whatever you’re doing certainly looks good on you. I don’t think I’ve seen you smile like that in a long time.”
Maria shrugged. “He makes me happy. It feels like I’ve wanted him for such a long time, and now that we’re together, it’s even better than I thought it could be.”
Beth cocked her head to the side and watched her for a moment. “This is serious, isn’t it?”
Maria’s nod was a small, subtle movement, but she didn’t elaborate.
Beth looked around to make sure they were alone and leaned across the table. “You’re not going to share any details about whatever you’ve got going on with Mr. Tall, Dark and Edible?”
Maria tried to maintain her poker face, since she and Alex had decided to keep their relationship a secret, but she couldn’t hide it from her best friend. “It’s complicated.”
“Ooh, sounds juicy.”
“He doesn’t want Rafa to find out, and because he’s technically my boss, we’ve been keeping it kind of secret.”
“Even juicier. And how is he?”
“He’s well.”
“Girl, you know that’s not what I meant.”
Maria winked. “It’s really good. He really is amazing in bed. But that’s not all. He might look like a tough guy, but he’s sweet, kind. I really like him.”
“I’ll bet he is.”
“And that’s all you’re getting.”
Beth huffed out a dramatic breath and sat back in her chair. “And seeing as how you aren’t going to share any juicy details. I guess we should just sit here and eat our ice cream. I’m sorry, but I do need to make this quick. I volunteered to clean out the equipment room. It’ll probably take hours.”
Maria frowned again.
“What’s wrong?” Beth asked.
“Nothing, really. I’m so grateful to have a job, but I really do miss working at the center as much as I used to. I’d love to go back and help you.”
“You still come by when you can.”
“But not as much. I’m doing office work for rich businessmen. It’s a nice placeholder, but I’m not doing anything to help anyone. While I know I’m important to the team, it’s not exactly fulfilling work.”
“We miss you down there, too. So do the kids. Maybe you’ll find a way to do both. Oh there’s some news: Anna is stepping down.”
“What?” Maria couldn’t believe that the dedicated center coordinator would ever leave.
“She’s moving to Tucson to be closer to her family. But you know, that means there’s a position open,” Beth said helpfully.
“Good to know,” Maria said, sadly. She knew that she was qualified for Anna’s position, but it didn’t pay much. The salary wasn’t anywhere close to what she was making at Collins/Fischer. It would just cover her bills and not allow for luxuries or savings. But it was a job she really wanted, one she would be good at. “If only there were enough hours in the day to do both, right?”
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
ALEX AND ALANA were quiet but cautiously jubilant as they left city hall with Jessica. Throughout the week, they both had individually met with most of the city councillors and members of the community and assured them that there would be nothing too lascivious happening at the Hedo, and even though there were still a couple of holdouts, they were confident that they’d made their case. Now they just had to wait for their new permit application to go through.
“Thanks for everything, Jess,” Alex said, turning to her. “I’m sorry any of this had to blow back on you and your career.”
She waved him off. “I’ve handled a little bit of scandal before—I can handle it again. Plus, I know neither of us has done anything wrong. It’s business as usual. And Neil is fast-tracking your permit, so we should definitely know something by the end of the week.”
“We appreciate it.” He looked up and saw Councillor Perry, an old man who had served on council for decades. He was known to be strict, firm and quite conservative. He was the last councillor he wanted to talk to. “Ladies, excuse me for a moment,” he said, breaking away. “Councillor,” he called and jogged up to him.
The other man stopped as he was leaving the building. “Yes?” His thick eyebrows knit together as he frowned.
Alex extended his hand. “Alex Fischer, from Collins/Fischer.”
Perry just looked at his hand instead of shaking it. “Yes, I know who you are.”
Alex had dealt with difficult people in the past, and the councilman’s rebuke did nothing to throw him off. “I was hoping to speak to you today. But you weren’t in your office.”
“Is that so?”
“Yes, we wanted to assure you, and address any concerns you might have about our proposed hotel.”
“Ah yes, the brothel you want to open on the Strip.”
Alex felt his cheek twitch. “It won’t be a brothel.”
“You want to bring filth to the heart of our tourism industry.”
Alex was taken aback. “We’re not proposing to do anything that tarnishes the name of Sin City,” he said, using Las Vegas’s nickname for effect.
“No, of course you wouldn’t,” the geriatric asshole said, looking Alex over.
“Do we have a problem, sir?”
“No problem. I know all about you. You were just an inch away from spending your entire life in the system. I looked into the pasts of you and your partner, Brett Collins, when the proposal passed over my desk. Collins is an addict and you’re a poor foster kid who got lucky, but still looks like a thug.”
Alex had to literally bite his tongue to stop himself from saying something that he would regret. The old fucker could say anything he wanted about him, but not his friend. He and Brett had both experienced their troubles in the past, but those were behind them now.
“Look at you, with all of those tattoos. You want to be taken seriously in this community? Maybe you should have made better choices.”
Alex stepped back from the councillor before he found his fist connecting with the man’s eighty-year-old jaw. “I can see we aren’t going to change your mind on this. We were hoping for a consensus with city council. But with most of your colleagues on board, we’ll just go around you. Thank you for your time.”
As he walked back to where Alana stood with Jessica, he thought about what Councillor Perry had said to him. But it was his own near-violent reaction to the old man that had disappointed him the most. Maybe the councillor wasn’t wrong. Maybe Alex was still the same thug he always was. Maybe he hadn’t changed as much as he’d thought.
Alex rejoined the women in time to hear Alana say to Jessica, “We were going to head over to club, want to join us?”
“No, I’ve got a meeting to get to, but thanks,” Jessica said. “And Rafael and I have dinner plans later.”
“I definitely need a drink after today. You don’t know how many of those guys asked me if, and how, I would personally welcome them to Di Terrestres,” Alana said, pulling out her high blond ponytail and fluffing her hair as they headed for Alex’s Jag. Alex’s eyes narrowed in a glare, and she waved him off. “Don’t worry, lascivious assholes are nothing new. I know how to take care of them.”
“What did you say?”
“I tell them that I would be glad to welcome them and their wives anytime. You should have seen their faces.”
Alex laughed. As a woman in their business, he knew Alana put up with a lot of sexism and other bullshit. But she did know how to take care of herself and wouldn’t have any of them interfering on her behalf. “Still not cool, though.”
“I know, but Viagra-popping post-middle-aged men are the least of my worries. Let’s just focus on Hedo for now. What did Perry have to say?”
“Nothing encouraging,” he muttered. “Maybe you would have had more luck.”
“God, how many more st
umbling blocks are we going to have on this hotel?”
“This isn’t a stumbling block. We don’t need him. Hopefully this will be all. Once the permit is straightened out, we can get the crews in immediately.” Alex unlocked the doors and they both got in.
“That’s optimistic of you,” Alana said.
“Some days, optimism is all I’ve got.” The thought of settling at their usual table at Di Terrestres got him thinking. He felt raw thinking about his troubled past, and even though he owned the place, he suddenly didn’t feel like he fit in at Di Terrestres, as if he didn’t belong there. He turned to Alana. “You know, I don’t really feel like heading to the club tonight. Want to go somewhere else?”
“Yeah, what did you have in mind?”
“How about a bit of a blast from the past?”
When Alex headed toward the university, Alana started to laugh, knowing exactly where he was driving. “It’s been a while,” Alex agreed. He made a couple of more familiar turns, but ones he hadn’t taken in years, and parked his car in front of the dive bar where they’d shared many a pitcher of beer while in grad school.
“Think your car will be okay here?” she asked.
“I’m sure it’ll be fine.”
They walked inside and while Alana found a table near the back, Alex went to the bar and ordered them a pitcher of beer.
“I know it’s Thursday, but it’s not like we had any downtime this weekend, so what the hell?” he said, expertly pouring each of them a mug of beer. He’d worked at the same bar, putting himself through college.
Alana accepted her glass and took a sip. “Sounds good. We’ll get a cab home. And it’s been a while since we’ve had any time to chat.”
“What do you want to chat about?” He dragged a tired hand across his face. “Anything except for work, please.”
“Well, if we aren’t talking about work, that narrows the list of topics considerably. Movies?”
“Who has time for movies?”
“Pets? No,” she corrected herself. “Neither of us has a pet. Politics is exhausting. We can gossip about our friends, I guess.”
Alex laughed.
“That leaves sex, I guess.”
He sobered and said nothing. Talking about sex meant talking about Maria.
“I haven’t seen you at the club lately,” Alana told him. She ran the place and had her eyes on everything that happened there. “That could mean one of two things: you’re in a relationship, or you’re bored by what we offer, which I know isn’t possible. How’s the love life?”
Alex snorted into his glass and drank without answering, but Alana had honed in on it. He and Alana had always connected, since they’d met in college. Things had always been platonic between them, and they’d been each other’s sounding board when it came to matters of the opposite sex.
“That bad, huh?”
“You have no idea,” he muttered. “What about you? Let’s talk about your love life.”
“That’s a short, boring conversation.”
“No obsessed suitors darkening your door?”
“Hardly,” she scoffed. “Thank God for the club, or I wouldn’t have any sort of physical release. And it doesn’t help that I’ve been sleeping in my office bedroom most nights.”
Alex felt bad. Alana’s workload had increased significantly since they’d started work on opening the hotel. It seemed that his venture, his pet project, was adversely affecting his friends. But if he needed to, he could handle the work on his own. “If you need to step back, just let me know. I can deal with the hotel stuff. You’ve got a lot on your plate right now.”
“No, don’t worry about it. It’s not like there’s anything else better to do in Vegas.” She put her elbows on the table and leaned in.
“Yeah, boring ol’ Las Vegas, with no shortage of people, shows, concerts, attractions...”
She laughed. “Shut up. I don’t want to talk about it. Don’t worry about me, or my workload, or my sex life. So, what’s going on with you? You’re more sullen than usual.”
He needed to tell someone; maybe Alana would understand and provide a little insight into the mess he’d made of his life. “You called it. I am seeing someone, but it’s doomed from the start. It’s not right, and I know it.”
“Well, I can’t say I’m not intrigued. What’s going on? Nothing sketchy or illegal, right?”
“Illegal? No. Sketchy? Most definitely.”
“Okay... Lay it on me.”
“It’s Maria. We’re sleeping together.”
Alana’s eyes widened for moment, and then she nodded in understanding. “You know, that night at Di Terrestres, I knew something was up with you guys. But man, forget for a second that she works for us. She’s Raf’s sister. He doesn’t know?”
“No. He might have had some idea something was going on last weekend.” He remembered the wary way Raf had looked at him after they’d almost been caught together in the pantry. “I think he thinks that something is up. He’s going to kick my ass if he finds out. And not to even mention what Brett will do when he finds out what I’m doing with our new assistant. Although, I’m sure he suspects something is going on.”
“I wouldn’t worry about Brett. He’ll probably just give you a good scolding. Raf will at least kick your ass, though. Just so you know, I’m not going to tell either of them. But if you’re just messing around with her—”
Alex glared at her.
“Is it more than that?”
“Christ.” Alex drank from his glass. “I don’t know. She’s so fucking good, you know? She’s this amazing person, and she’s so pure, and full of life and optimism.”
“She is.”
“And I’m a mess. Why couldn’t I just go back to living my life the way I used to? Work, gym, clubs, sex, repeat. It was so easy, mess-free. But Maria’s thrown a wrench into all of it. I just find myself wanting to be with her all the time.”
“That’s kind of fucked up, Alex. Sounds kind of like the L-word, though.”
“I don’t know.”
“And you’re not going to tell Raf?”
“I need to. But I have no idea how. You know how protective he is. He’s trying to focus on his run for Senate, and I can’t afford to drive a wedge in the group while we have so many things going on. We need to be united on every front. You don’t need to tell me that it sounds like a cop-out... I know I sound like a goddamn coward.”
Alana seemed to accept that, because she sat back in her seat and looked around the bar. “Man, so much has changed for us since the last time we were here.”
Alex nodded. The Brotherhood had traded in the beat-up booth at a college bar for their table at Di Terrestres. Alex looked at his rough, tattooed hands. Maybe Perry was right. Maybe he hadn’t changed. Maybe he was the same poor punk he’d always been. He couldn’t hide himself behind the steering wheel of a luxury car or an expensive suit. “But it doesn’t feel like we’ve changed, does it?”
Alana leaned in, as if sensing his melancholy. “What’s up?” He shook his head and tried not to answer her. But she didn’t let it go. “Talk to me, Alex.”
“I don’t know. Maybe I’ve been doing a lot of soul-searching and all that. My relationship with Maria, and with what Councillor Perry said to me today, I’ve just got a lot on my mind.”
“What did he say?”
“He just said out loud what I’ve always suspected—I’m still just a thug in a suit.” He looked down at himself. “This isn’t the real me.”
Alana’s face softened. “Come on, man, no. That’s a goddamn lie, and you know it. We’re all a part of The Brotherhood, despite our backgrounds. You might have had a rougher start than the rest of us, but you’ve also worked harder than anyone I know. Don’t listen to what some old, ignorant tool says. You’re a good, intelligent man. And you’re a shrewd businessman
who got where he is with hard work, no matter what tattoos you have on your skin.”
“I know that, but sometimes it’s just hard, you know? Just feeling like I don’t belong. And I feel like people can see it.”
“Imposter syndrome is a cruel bitch, Alex. I have a theory that nobody feels like they belong all the time. Especially since we were so successful early in our careers, people didn’t believe we earned it. But we did. Don’t think for one second that you don’t deserve this life. We all do.” She looked at their empty pitcher and grasped the handle. “Next round is on me.”
After several hours, and a couple of pitchers, Alex sat back in the booth. Their agreement to not talk about work didn’t last for long. They’d scrawled notes on several napkins and had brainstormed their way through some design and structural issues that they might run into.
Alana waved one of the napkins. “We should really do most of our work here,” she said, her voice slurring a little. They were both feeling the buzz, but they were confident with what they’d accomplished.
“Well, it worked for group projects in college,” Alex added. “It was nice to get back to basics at least for an evening.”
Alana yawned. “But now I’m tapped, man. I’m going to call a car.” She pulled out her phone and typed a quick message to one of their drivers. “You coming?”
Alex thought about leaving, but he wasn’t ready yet. He knew it was too late to call Maria, so leaving would mean going back to his cold, empty condo. He shook his head. “No, I might stick around a little longer.”
Alana’s concerned gaze irritated him. “You sure? Is everything all right?”
“Everything is fine. I just want to sit here for a bit. I’ve got some thinking to do.”
“All right, hon.” She put a friendly hand on his shoulder as her phone buzzed. “And that’s my ride.” She patted him on the back, as she stood. “We’ll talk tomorrow.”
Alex nodded and watched his friend stride to the door. He could have left with her, but he didn’t want to, the vast emptiness of his condo becoming less and less appealing with each day. It dawned on him that that was the reason he spent so much time at the office, and why he often found himself taking on many projects at once, ones that took most of his time. But now he was on his own. And he could relax in the once-familiar environs of the dive bar where he’d spent so much time during college.
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