Forever at Conwenna Cove

by Forever at Conwenna Cove (retail) (epub)

  When Zoe lowered her gaze again, she could see a lone figure down on the sand, walking towards the cliffs off to her left. It could be Nate, but from this distance and in the twilight, she couldn’t be certain. Her stomach gave a flutter and she realised that she was looking forward to seeing him more than she’d admitted to herself earlier. She’d taken time to think through what had happened when she’d returned to Devon, and she had no regrets about going to see Amelia. It had been an entirely positive experience and although part of her hoped she would see her old friend again, she knew that even if she didn’t, she had at least been able to let her anger go and to forgive Amelia.

  Zoe took one more deep breath then made her way down the path to the beach. The long grass swished against her ankles and the sandy path was loose beneath her soles, so she took her time, although she’d walked the path so many times over the past few years that she knew she could probably get to the bottom blindfolded.

  Once on the sand, she looked around for Nate. There were a few stragglers still in the sea, making the most of the warm water after a day of sunshine. Off to her right, some of the local teenagers were having a barbecue. The strains of an acoustic guitar reached her ears and she smiled. Who’d have thought kids their age would even know ‘Hotel California’?

  Deciding it was more likely Nate would be off to the left, she went in that direction. She soon spotted him and a sigh escaped her lips when she saw what he’d done.

  In the shelter of the towering grey cliffs, Nate had spread out a large blanket that he’d weighted down with rocks. Around the edges were four solar-powered lanterns, casting their ethereal pale blue light over the sand, and in the centre of the blanket were four glass votive holders that created a warm circle of light. To the side of the blanket sat a cooler box; next to it, Nate was on his knees with his back to her, rooting around in a rucksack.

  She approached slowly, hoping he’d turn around as she didn’t want to startle him. When he did turn, she raised a hand in greeting then picked up her pace.

  ‘Evening, Nate.’

  ‘Zoe.’ He stood up and walked towards her. ‘So good to see you. It feels like weeks since you showed me the cakes.’

  ‘It has been a busy week.’

  As he took her hands and kissed her cheek, his sandalwood scent washed over her and she closed her eyes briefly to savour it.

  ‘What’s all this about, then?’ she asked.

  ‘I wanted to thank you for all your effort with the cakes.’

  ‘You didn’t need to. I’m glad to help out.’

  ‘I wanted to. And not just for the cakes but for everything.’

  ‘Everything?’

  He nodded. ‘I’ll explain, but come and sit down first.’

  He led her towards the blanket and she sat down, then he produced two plastic cups from behind the rucksack and a bottle of cider from the cooler.

  ‘Cider?’

  ‘This one’s delicious. It’s from the cider mill at Luna Bay.’

  ‘I haven’t drunk cider in years. Not since I was a teenager, in fact.’

  ‘What, since you used to drink White Lightning or something similar?’

  ‘That’s the stuff.’ She giggled. ‘Those were the days, eh?’

  He nodded. ‘To be honest, I didn’t do a lot of teenage drinking. It was all about swimming and surfing.’

  ‘If only some of the kids today could be like that.’

  ‘Hey, grandma!’ He nudged her. ‘The youth of today, right?’ He stroked his chin with his thumb and forefinger as if lost in thought and Zoe nudged him back.

  ‘So you wanted to thank me for the cakes – and something else?’

  ‘First a toast.’ He popped the cork from the bottle then poured the bubbly liquid into the two plastic cups. He handed one to Zoe and she caught a whiff of a fruity floral scent that made her mouth water.

  ‘Zoe,’ Nate raised his cup, ‘this is to friendship and everything else that comes with it. Also, to you for being so sweet and thoughtful and to the greyhounds and finding them their forever homes.’

  Zoe tapped her cup against his then sipped the drink. The bubbles tickled her nose and she pursed her lips at the sweet, sharp contrast of flavours.

  ‘Mmmm. That’s good.’

  ‘I know. I picked some up from the farm shop when I went to check that everything was organized for Surf for Sighthounds.’

  Zoe took another sip, enjoying the simple pleasure of drinking organic cider on a beach with a man she liked very much.

  ‘The candles are pretty… it’s a nice touch.’

  ‘I’m glad you think so. I wanted to do something special. I also have supper in the cooler, so I hope you haven’t eaten. I forgot to add that in my text.’

  ‘I haven’t and I am peckish, now you mention it.’

  ‘Hold this and I’ll get the food out.’

  Zoe held Nate’s cider and watched as he spread the contents of the cooler out on the blanket. There were three wedges of different coloured cheese, a salmon and asparagus quiche, a Tupperware container of potato salad, a large bag of sea salt crisps and four large, fresh peaches.

  ‘That looks incredible, Nate.’

  ‘We should eat well, right? The quiche and the potato salad are courtesy of Uncle Kevin, but I picked the rest up in Truro earlier.’

  ‘You went into Truro especially to get this?’

  Nate dropped his gaze to the blanket and his cheeks coloured slightly. When he met Zoe’s gaze again, his smile lit up his whole face.

  ‘Yeah.’

  ‘Thank you.’

  Zoe leant forwards and went to kiss his cheek but he moved and instead their lips met. She jolted as if shocked by the spark she’d felt.

  ‘Must be nylon in this picnic blanket.’ Nate patted the blanket. ‘If not, there’s definitely some serious electricity between us.’ His grin warmed her heart.

  Zoe handed him his drink, then he gave her a paper plate and they ate, pausing only to comment on the creamy richness of the cheese, the flaky perfection of the quiche pastry and how well it all went with the cider.

  When they’d eaten their fill of the savoury food, Nate handed her a peach. It was perfectly ripe, the silky skin a pinky-orange. When she bit into it, the flesh was sweet and aromatic, the wonderful taste of summer.

  ‘You have juice running down your chin,’ Nate said and Zoe nodded. She didn’t have a free hand to wipe it away so Nate came to her rescue, gently dabbing her chin with his napkin. It was such an intimate gesture that Zoe’s heart sped up and she had to tear her gaze from his perfect features. He was so handsome it almost hurt her to look at him, because she knew she couldn’t have him. He wasn’t available, he wasn’t free, he was leaving and it wasn’t fair. Then her thoughts about enjoying her time with him until he went away came back and she nursed them inside like a precious infant, wanting them to be possible, yet not sure if she could give them life.

  ‘Tell me about you, Zoe. I want to know more.’

  ‘Like what?’

  ‘Who are your parents?’

  ‘My parents?’

  ‘Yes. Who are they? Where do they live?’

  Zoe drained her cup then placed it next to her on the blanket.

  ‘They’re long gone.’

  ‘I’m sorry.’

  ‘It’s okay. They were older having me and quite set in their ways. We weren’t really close because we didn’t agree on a lot of things. I grew up in Devon, in a pretty harbour town, and my parents were good to me, in their own way, but I was never close to them. I saw school friends with their parents and sometimes envied them the relationships they had with their mums and dads. My parents never left me wanting for anything financially; I had a good education, music lessons, private tutors, and they wanted me to be a professional of some sort, like a doctor or a lawyer or something similar. But they never asked me what I wanted and, as I grew older, the pressure mounted. I was stuck in studying while my friends went out enjoying themselves and I grew res
entful.’ She glanced at Nate to gauge his reaction but he was nodding in understanding.

  ‘When I turned seventeen, I rebelled, and instead of a daughter they could be proud of, I became their biggest disappointment. When you’ve become someone’s disappointment, it puts a wedge between you that’s pretty tough to budge. They never got over me refusing to conform and I never got over them not loving me for who I was.’

  ‘Again, I’m sorry.’

  ‘Again… don’t be. It’s not your fault. Besides, I think it all made me stronger. If they’d been loving and indulgent, then what came afterwards would probably have reduced me to dust. It almost did, but I’m kind of like the phoenix, I guess.’ She gave a laugh to show she wasn’t being arrogant. ‘I rise from the ashes.’

  ‘You are strong. I can see it in you, that inner strength. It radiates from you, even though you’ve been hurt in the past.’

  ‘Experiences shape us, don’t they?’

  Nate nodded.

  ‘Anyway, they’re gone now. Both cremated because that was what they wanted and both scattered at the beach where they met all those years ago. Quite romantic, really, although the fruit of their union kind of ruined it a bit.’

  ‘I’m sure they loved you.’

  ‘They did, I think, but they loved each other and their lifestyle more. Which is fine.’

  Zoe stared out at the sea in the fading light. The colours of the sunset had blended to mauve and the clouds were darker now, dove-grey shapes that floated across an indigo background.

  ‘Not everyone should be a parent.’

  ‘That’s true.’

  ‘How do you feel about them now?’

  ‘Sometimes, there’s a flicker of the old resentment, but then I remember that they did their best. The best that they thought they could, and I can’t fault them for that. Perhaps their parents weren’t particularly loving, and we learn from our families, don’t we?’

  ‘We also learn how to make things better from our mistakes and from those around us.’

  ‘True. I’d be a different kind of mum.’

  ‘You’ll be a lovely mum.’

  Zoe peered at him from under her lashes. His face was warm in the candlelight and it was a face to melt hearts.

  ‘If I ever have kids.’

  ‘Same here.’

  ‘What? You’ll be a lovely mum, too?’

  ‘Ha ha! I like to think I’d be a good dad.’

  ‘If only we knew what lay ahead for us.’

  ‘Sometimes I think it’s better not to. I mean, if my father had known that he was going to die young, he might not have enjoyed his life as much as he did.’

  ‘He died before you came here, right?’

  Nate nodded. ‘Suddenly. But that’s the way I’d prefer to go. I’d hate to be incapacitated by an illness or to know how long I had left and end up counting the days.’

  ‘Was he a good dad?’

  ‘The best. He taught me so much and was funny, kind and understanding.’

  ‘It’s nice when you have that. I mean… I imagine it must be nice. I think I got married so young because I was looking for that kind of love and security. I just wanted to be accepted by someone for who I was.’

  ‘And were you?’

  ‘In all honesty… no. But I picked the wrong guy.’

  ‘How old were you?’

  ‘Eighteen when we married, but I met him at seventeen and he turned my world upside down.’

  ‘Young love, eh?’

  ‘Kind of a Romeo and Juliet in that my parents disapproved of him and his lifestyle and our parents would never have got on.’

  ‘Yikes.’

  ‘Exactly. But I learned from being married to him, and I know I’d never put myself through all that again.’

  ‘I wish there was a way to make it all better for you.’

  ‘To turn back the clock?’

  ‘If I could.’

  ‘I’d rather stay right here.’

  ‘Right now?’

  She nodded. ‘We can’t change the past, Nate. As much as we sometimes wish we could. We have to let go and embrace today.’

  ‘Would you travel if you had the chance?’

  Zoe lay back on the blanket and gazed up at the sky, where the stars had appeared.

  ‘I think so. I’ve settled here and I love the cove but there are places I want to go.’

  ‘Where?’

  ‘Oh, all the usuals… like New York, perhaps. I’d like to walk through Central Park, see the view from the top of the Rock, take a carriage ride…’

  Nate had fallen silent and when she turned her head to peer at him, she found him reclining on his side, his arm supporting his head.

  ‘Are you smiling?’

  ‘I am. I think you should take the time to travel. It would be good for you.’

  ‘You do?’

  ‘Zoe… this might seem crazy but… I’ve been thinking… you could come with me.’

  ‘What?’ She sat upright. ‘Come travelling?’

  ‘You could…’

  She allowed herself to entertain the idea for a moment, allowed images of her and Nate taking selfies in front of the Empire State Building, at Strawberry Fields and possibly even on a beautiful beach somewhere warm, to flicker through her mind. They would eat cheesecake in Times Square, drink beer at a genuine sports bar, soak up the sun on luxury loungers beside a sparkling pool, and then rush back to their hotel where they would…

  ‘I can’t.’

  ‘Why not?’

  ‘Nate, I have the diner. See, my parents left me money in trust that I couldn’t access until I was thirty. That was a good thing as it turned out, because my ex might well have wasted it, if I’d had it sooner. Or I could have blown it on him, more like. But I wanted to invest it, to have some security and something that belonged to me after so long just drifting and rebelling against what they’d wanted for me. The diner is all I have and I can’t give it up.’

  Nate sat up then and moved closer to her, taking her hands in his.

  ‘I understand that, Zoe. I honestly do. I’ve been the opposite I suppose, not wanting to be tied to anything and I have had a good time since I moved here. I haven’t taken life too seriously but I’ve saved for my trip. The thought of going away and seeing some of the world kept me going when the pain over my dad was at its worst. He always wanted to travel and he inspired me. What if…’ He bit his bottom lip as he scanned her face. ‘What if I didn’t go away for so long in one go? You could come with me then and get someone to watch the diner for you. You could come with me for all or part of it; that would be up to you. We could go through my plans together, alter them if need be, but then we could sort something out for the diner, too. We could find someone to take care of it for you.’

  Zoe smiled as he squeezed her hands. He was being so sincere and so convincing, it actually sounded as if it could be possible.

  ‘Oh, Nate, I don’t know. I mean… it sounds so good but I don’t know if I could trust anyone else to take care of the diner, long term. What if they didn’t run it properly? My whole reputation would be at stake and I could lose business, lose it all.’

  The fear gripped her again, the one she tried to keep at bay. She couldn’t drift along again as she once had. Look at how badly she’d been betrayed and how, if her parents hadn’t left her that money, she’d have been jobless, destitute, and hopeless. The diner was solid, bricks and mortar, but what she had here with Nate was emotional, intangible. Nate might like her now but that could change, someone better could come along and steal him away. He could lose interest in her or she could in him; after all, he was the first man she’d looked at properly in ages and what if they went away together and she found that she didn’t like him as much as she’d believed she did. What if he discovered something about her that he didn’t like? It could turn out to be disastrous…

  ‘That wouldn’t happen, Zoe. We’d make sure of it.’

  She sighed then, long and deep, and he released
her hands and wrapped his arm around her shoulders.

  ‘I know you’ve been hurt, Zoe. I understand that and this is a big ask. Hell, it’s a big risk because we don’t know each other that well. But please consider this because I truly believe it’s a risk worth taking and because… the more time I spend with you, the harder it’s going to be to leave.’

  ‘You could avoid me until you go,’ she murmured against his chest as she slid her arms around his waist.

  ‘That’s not going to happen.’

  ‘I hope not.’

  They stayed that way, holding each other tight until the moon was out and the temperature dropped enough to make them shiver, then they packed up the picnic and Nate walked Zoe back to her cottage and kissed her softly on the lips before saying goodnight.

  Zoe watched him walk away, his rucksack on his back and the cooler under his arm like a bulky suitcase, and she knew that saying goodbye to him when he left to go travelling was going to be extremely hard indeed. But she couldn’t imagine how it could be any other way, unless she could find someone to run the diner as well as finding a way to put her fears and doubts aside and take the risk that Nate had asked her to take.

  Chapter 16

  The days passed quickly as Nate and the villagers prepared for Surf for Sighthounds and it was Wednesday before he knew it. Nate was busy making phone calls and sending emails, visiting sponsors as well as working at the cafe. He needed to help train his replacement – a young local woman who’d studied catering at college and who was taking a gap year before going off to university – so that he didn’t feel as if he’d be leaving his aunt and uncle in the lurch.

  He’d just sent a brief text to Zoe, asking how she was and telling her he’d try to get down to the diner later to see her, when he heard a familiar voice. He looked up from his mobile to see his mother embracing his aunt and uncle.

  ‘Mum!’ He went from behind the cafe counter and hugged her. ‘What’re you doing here?’