“I knew I’d seen you before, I was Rachel’s older boyfriend all through school. I heard about you, you told her a few home truths about her boobs being too small for that blouse, and got your head down the flusher, you remember Rachel Sam? She and I got engaged for a while like an hour?” Sam looked shocked.
“I knew it, I knew Karen from somewhere other than her Dad’s works and dance class, at the bloody farce of an engagement party were she announced to the room she was having your kid?” I was shocked.
“Yep double rubbers paid off well. I’d had a near miss with the other sister, Elaine, now she was a bloody good time and hated always being in Rachel’s shadow. Those were happy days, I knew it wasn’t mine and dumped her, her Dad threatened to kill me or have me killed, right up until I had her checked out the day after, she wasn’t even in the country when she fell pregnant, turns out it was born with a really good tan. Happy days it’s a bloody small world Michelle.” I was gob smacked at how blasé he was being.
“It is you’re right Andrew and if my memory serves me right I owe you a slap to the head. Didn’t you slap my head hard? My first year was spent with fucking wet hair, thanks to the fresh flush I got daily from the slag you poked in the bathrooms. I told you Sam I listen in toilets it seems I learnt some stuff from your randy brother too. Didn’t you get caught in there with another one of the Manning’s, Monica I seem to recall?
Do you remember too when you came to pick the eldest of the five slappers up from school and ask me which plug socket I stuck my finger into to get the curly hair and Jimmy saved me from another head smack?” He laughed as Sam gave him a dirty look, sheisk it was a long time ago Sam, way past time for thumping him.
“That’s how I knew that Andrew was Jimmy’s big brother, because Jimmy came to my rescue and told you to leave me alone? James that day became my friend and was my friend all through school, until I met Sam. It’s a bloody small world, if I’d have gone to either of the other schools I wouldn’t have been rescued by Jimmy nor in any of his classes and I wouldn’t have met Sam or I may have but he would have been in four years above me in the Grammar school.” Sam finally laughed and kissed me, Andy was shocked, and as he watched Sam smiling, he did too. He told me to carry on we had gotten distracted...
“I do well in school Andrew and listen I chose mental health issues for my sociology course work, so I do know a little about mental health issues, as to the money? I know it involves a lot, but not how much, and I wouldn’t let Sam tell me either, wars are started over money. So I would rather not know thanks, a drunken Sam told me how you got it and why. Well a very brief history lesson was given, but relax your money’s just that, yours Andrew. If I need anything, I pay my own way.
Alternatively, I ask my Gramps, who would give me his last penny if I needed it. I prefer to earn my own though, it feels better knowing I earned it, your brother has been a fucking nightmare, and he has been told I don’t have to be bought things but still he does it. So, Andrew it’s not my secret to tell. Your money your secret and trust who you want with the knowledge, they won’t hear it from me. I’m dead quiet in toilets, but I will promise to say nothing you have my word. Sam you’re really quiet, oh my you’re going to hurl, quick toilet.” He ran and he was quickly followed by Andy.
I just made it to the toilet. Michelle thinks I was scared of Dad before. Now I’m worse, I saw the look on his face he hates her. He knows I love her and he is going to use her against me, she is in danger! Yes, I was fine for the odd scuffle and whilst Michael was there to make damn sure I wasn’t hurt, but he is up to something and getting no money from me today, spells trouble tomorrow. We will have to watch her keep her safe.
Christ just tell her dad he will sort it, but then he’s involved and dragging someone else into this mess. Shit if anything happens to her at his hands I will die, she may think she has it covered but he is so evil. I saw that as we left, he’s out for revenge. I love my babies fate thing too, she’s right I’m very glad she went to Stockton Secondary, I wouldn’t have met her otherwise, and all thanks to Jimmy mooning over her and for a hell of a lot longer than he had us believe too, he’s fancied her for bloody years not months, poor Jimmy! I throw up again the thought of not having her in my life is killing me and Friday can’t come soon enough!
“Why, the hell did you tell her everything Sam? She’s going to want your money now you dick head. She will tell Zoë and Christ… Why did you Sam?” I finished throwing up, wiped my mouth and went out, rinsed my face and mouth.
“Andy shut it… Michelle and I, we have no secrets, because I am marrying her and she isn’t a gold digger. She hasn’t let me pay for much of anything, she gets quite mad if I do, as to Zoë she’s not that palsy with her in case you hadn’t noticed, remember the falling out? She knows family business is just that so shut it, she is family as far as everyone else is concerned, what’s your problem with her Andy?” He shrugged his shoulders.
“Not sure Sam… She… Well I don’t know, but tell her to keep the money thing to herself! You trust her but I’m still working out who I can trust Sam.”
“I don’t have to tell Michelle to do anything, she isn’t stupid Andy, did you not listen to her tell you, it was your secret not hers? My God after all she’s done and gone through why do you have to doubt her?” We went back I felt a little better, but shit, my head was exploding. Michelle asked Andy when we got back to phone for Aunty to come and get us. Sitting waiting for Aunty to come Michelle has a rant about it being her fault, we can’t get it through to her, that she changed our world for the better. She held me tightly reaching for Andy’s hand too. He pulled his hand away. That; I found strange. Why didn’t he like Michelle? She noticed his actions, but simply smiled.
Andy looks at her again and he looks at her his eyes stirring into hers, shit why did I not see it before? He’s has the same look Jimmy has when he looks at her crap, he’s fallen for Michelle and he knows she’s mine. I knew he joked about it before and Michelle sort of said he fancied her, that night in her long and sexy rant at me! He’s made a pass at her and she hasn’t said anything? I remember the chat she had with us after the incident! ‘There’s lot’s I will do to protect those I love, whether it’s fighting their corner, keeping their secret or being there when they need me!’ That makes sense now too; I did wonder when she said it.
She also said he wished she was marrying him after last night! I should hate him, but I can’t! I look at my girl and the effect she has on my brothers, my mother and aunty. She’s a Todd family snake charmer I laugh to myself she calls my soldier, a snake. Shit she doesn’t know the power she has. I am so lucky. I wish my head would calm down, it’s feeling worse if anything? I wonder how mum has been today? I’ll soon find out Aunty is here.
I asked Andy when he got back to phone for Aunty to come and get us, a taxi won’t take him throwing up. Sam was so pale and I’d say in shock, he isn’t strong enough to stand up to his Father but I insist he is and that he does it, because he needs to face his demons but with a proper councillor helping him not just his young and inexperienced though well-meaning girlfriend, I should tell Dad and he will sort it and him in the same right hook. What have I done to him, he needs proper help to talk to someone, but if I mention it, again I’m going to start sounding like a cracked record?
“All this is my sodding fault. I am so sorry all this is my fault I can’t help but think if I hadn’t just shut up everything would be fine.” They both looked at me.
“Why did you make him hit you, were you bad? All you did was make him something nice to eat. He crossed the line, that’s fine if he wants to do that to us, but it’s not to do it to you and if you hadn’t spoken up and shouted, Mum would still be there and in danger.” I held him in my arms. Reaching for Andy’s hand too but he pulls it away. I laugh, but carry on hugging Sam.
“No angel it’s not all right for him to hit any of you ever.” Andy looked at Sam and I, he looks hurt and I feel so sorry for him, he has suffered fa
r more than anyone else. This family is in need of some sort of therapy thing and quickly they need to get their lives back together. One thing is for certain, they need to sort out their living arrangements. Sam is not going back to that house and his dad tonight, or ever. Aunty came Sam sat in the back and I climbed in by his side.
“You too, you’re not facing him alone.” Amazingly, he didn’t argue and got in. Aunty Allison looked at me.
“I’ll explain when we get in, I promise.” Sam got out of the car and we walked in silence into the house. “Jimmy be a love and put the kettle on please.” He looked at me and did as I asked. “We had a run in with their Dad or basically I did when he came in the pub. Sam, Dad and I were in there, and in he walked barking orders at poor Sam. I think the shock of the past few days has finally hit home, you know what’s in store for him and all of you. Dad had him for calling me a tart and a bitch and he marched off towards home followed by Dad, but he was in a foul mood and I didn’t think it was safe for them to go back tonight sorry.” She came across and sat by Sam. He put his head against her chest and cried she cradled his head as he wept. I got up quietly and went to help Jimmy with the drinks.
“Sorry Jimmy, I bet you’re pissed off with me too aren’t you?” He looked at me and smiled.
“Why what have you done? You didn’t do this, Dad should have kept his hands to himself, as it is I was only hit a couple of times and then only to get Sam to pay up. Those two got it every day, if it wasn’t hitting out it was mental abuse, if it wasn’t that, it was their money. They have loads complain about, but they never do ever. They saved me from many a clobbering by getting it themselves. I wondered what it would take for Mum to snap out of it and that something was you.” I was shocked.
“I didn’t know he was as cruel as he was until Sam told me a few things when he was drunk, then Andy spilled a few secrets back in the pub, he really is a sick bastard and one you’re all better off without. I knew he was a drunk and a violent drunk too. My dad has a skin full, throws things has arguments, goes to bed and sulks or comes home loaded with takeout from the chip shop. No wonder Sam said he wanted me to meet the normal side of the family they are kisses and cuddles. He’s smelly and smacks.” I smiled. “Well, it will be sorted soon, and then it’s up to you if you go to see him or he rots on his own and it’s no more than he deserves too. They’re all nice and well mannered, you umm, you not so much Jim Bob.” He smirked at me.
“I just fell for the wrong girl that’s all. You’re better for Sam than me, you’re way too old for me up there, and he’s always been a worrying old man. He had to grow up and damn fast dealing with Dad and what with Andy being away from the house a lot.” He pushed my head playfully. “Who’d have thought that about Hair Bear?” I punched his arm. I actually liked the new Jimmy, a whole lot more.
“Drinks please waiters.” Sam was at the back of me his arms around my waist, He was red eyed, but more relaxed and he felt nice as he leant into me. “You two have been in here too long, we thought you were growing the tea or going to India for it?” He smiled.
“No, we were just chatting about college and whether it’s worth me going in tomorrow. I just have hockey and they have a sub they can use.” I lied, because I didn’t want him to know what Jimmy had just told me.
“You're going to be there with bells on, with a cheerleading line up. Well, me and Jimmy.” I loved him even more, if that were at all possible?
“Can we talk in the garden please? I need to tell you something.” Jimmy grinned as he disappeared through with the drinks. Ours were on the side, taking them out and drank them whist sat on the back wall. “Are you all right now? I was worried about you, I’m so sorry I wouldn’t want him to hurt you, I love you, and I don’t think Dad would have let him hurt you either he sort of likes you.” He put his drink down and stood in front of me.
“You mean the world to me I couldn’t cope with all this if you weren’t here. I know Jimmy filled you in. I listened to the whole conversation you both had. I was just worried, in case he went weird on you again. It is quite the reverse, it may be the best thing for him leaving Dad, when did you get so clever?”
“Angel, I have always been a smart arse, more eighty in the head than eighteen, and more helpers in there than they employ in Woolworths and well I intend to be a chef in the kitchen and I hope to be, as they say a whore in the bedroom.” He looked at me catching flies. He lent in and kissed me his hands cradled my face as he does, with more than a few tears from both of us. I wrapped my arms around his waist. His kisses are so soft and inviting, he's pulling me in for more. “How do you feel about, I mean, will you marry me Sam not keep it secret a proper engagement? You having to ask Dad sort of occasion Sam? Say yes to a Christmas wedding, or New Year one at the latest and live in sin before we do? Will you marry me, note I’m asking you and I’m sober, and you’re just hung over, and so no excuses for forgetting this time?” He looked surprisingly at me and smiled.
“What you want to marry me, you really do want to marry me? You said you would last night, but you wanted it just between you and me until after your exams? We can tell people make it official, are you sure? Marrying you at Christmas sounds wonderful.” He was grinning like a mad man.
“Straight up and yes. If you haven’t had it with me causing uproar in your life?” He swung me around and let me down against him His kisses so needy and his hands wandering. “There’s a time and place Sam, time and place.” He smiled.
“Yes a definite yes, so can we tell everyone please, then a weekend away? I need to test the whore in the bedroom theory I’m thinking you're more high-class escort, than whore Missy? I think good news is what everyone needs, especially Mum. I love you.” He ducked the smack for the escort comment. I was at the receiving end of another of his kisses. He held my hand tightly as he sat down on the couch and I sat on his lap. Here goes…
“Michelle and I have some news we want to share.” Jimmy interrupted.
“You’re pregnant?” I blushed.
“No, I am not, you horrid boy.” I sat laughing at him.
“We are getting married at Christmas.” Sam hugged me.
“Worst kept secret in the world, all soft, lad said last night was how it would be different when you got married.” I laughed.
“That’s why you shouldn’t drink dear total memory loss is a bugger. Is that why you made the comment in the exam today?” Jimmy smiled.
“Yeah, Andy phoned to see if Mum had been all right and did we need anything and we had a good laugh at it Sam and his sleep talking. Like you’d marry him, but we were wrong apparently you’re both as stupid as each other.” I threw him a look. Emma and Aunty the pair of them were grinning.
“My Son is getting married to our angel Allison I told you they would.” They too were hugging and kissing us.
“I need to be getting back soon.” His arms tightly around my waist as I snuggled into him, he smelt nice, I’d died and had gone to heaven sat in his lap. Umm and his soldier was answering the reveille.
“I thought you were stopping here with us baby?”
“Sam, it’s not like we’re not going to see each other, tomorrow, I have a really big match tomorrow, and you are coming to be my cheerleaders right?” Aunty stepped in.
“You can stop if you want? I’ve had a drink or three, oh well about four, Emma and I have been looking at photos and reminiscing on the good old days. So please, stop here with us I will be fine to drive in the morning, I have to get James to class, and now you. Sleeping arrangements, I will share with Emma all the photos are over her bed anyway you two can have my bed. Andrew couch, and as you’ve all got to get up in the morning bed now the lot of you, I don’t know when Madams in probably in with the milkman.” I was embarrassed. It was different sleeping with him in my bed, but this was his aunt’s house and her bed. I waited with Sam for them all to bugger off to bed. Andy was grinning like a Cheshire cat.
“Stop that Andrew, Sam sort your pervy brother out, I�
��m going to ring Aunty Liz, and she can pop next door and tell them I’m safe and here.” I went to his aunt’s room in a huff, shit they all think we’ve actually been at it like oversexed rabbits well we had, but not the actual sex thing. I got undressed, and used the phone to ring Aunty Liz. She said it was fine she would go in and let them know. I lay down under the sheets and I must have gone straight to sleep, because when I woke, needing to use the toilet in the middle of the night, Sam was fast asleep but he was having a bad dream, sweating and thrashing around in the bed. I went to the toilet and quickly got in at the side of him I put him in my arms and hung on to him for dear life. He was screaming, when his Aunty came running in, I just looked at her.
“What did he do to him, tell me please tell me so I can help him?” She sat at the side of me.
“I don’t know? He’s never said and I know it was bad, but I’m not sure, what he did, or he had done to him? Emma went very strange at the time, I begged her to leave, but she never did, but they are safe now. Just love him he will tell you eventually.” She kissed my head and shut the door. He was crying like a baby. I held him tightly he threw his hands around me.
“Don’t leave me please Michelle, don’t ever leave me?” I held him.
“I’m here for as long as you need me, shush I’m not leaving you ever.” He stopped, calmed down and slept. I lay down at the side of him his arms came over me and pulled me closer as we slept.
A Life Plan Without You. Page 50