His brother pulled clothes from the dresser and stuffed them into the case.
“Am I going somewhere?” Mischa asked. Maybe the pack had a job for him. Getting away from Montana, the place Gwen grew up, might help. Someplace where he didn’t see Gwen around every corner.
“Yup. Sergei is arranging it now.”
“Where is he sending me? What do I need to do?”
“He’s sending you to London,” a feminine voice said from the door.
Mischa turned to find Lindy, his brother’s mate and female Alpha of the pack standing in the doorframe. Her brow furrowed as she looked at him.
“How did you not know your sister had been raped?” Mischa shook his head. “Gwen relives the violation in her dreams.”
“I knew something happened, but I didn’t know what.” Lindy wrung her hands. “Gwen kept it secret from all of us. I wish she’d told me. I could have helped her.”
“We’re going to help her, right now,” Andrei said, closing the suitcase and handing it to Mischa. “Your job is to claim your mate.”
“But . . .” She doesn’t want me, echoed in his mind.
“Yes, she does,” Lindy said as if she read his thoughts. “Gwen is afraid she can’t have a normal relationship with a male lycan. Once you prove to her that she can trust you, she’ll welcome your advances.”
“You must move slowly, but move you must,” Andrei said.
“It’s time to fix this once and for all,” Sergei said, walking up and putting his arm around his wife. “Lucky for you, I’m married to a Shadow Walker. Lindy will get you to London. Grigori will send someone to meet you and have a room waiting. Have a nice vacation.”
§
The phone rang. Gwen jumped. She knew who it was. She almost didn’t answer, but if she didn’t, the English Alpha would send someone to pound on her door.
“Are you all right?” Grigori asked, his Russian accented voice concerned. “Your mate said you had a nightmare.”
Again floated in the air between them unsaid.
Gwen sighed. The Alpha’s voice chased the rest of the nightmare away and Gwen’s wolf spirit settled.
“I can’t seem to escape them. I’m sorry Mischa called you. He shouldn’t be waking you in the middle of the night.”
“You’re wrong. A true lycan male will always take care of his mate. Even if it inconveniences others.” Grigori chuckled. “If our roles were reversed, I wouldn’t hesitate to call him and he knows it.”
“You’re a good man and a devoted husband.” The English Alpha had come from Siberia and saved the few lycans left on the island known as England. Both parts of herself, lycan and Shadow Walker, thought of him as a friend. In fact, since that night so many years ago, he was the first male she had come to trust besides her family members.
“Gwen, Mischa is a good man, too. I’ve known him all his life. He would never hurt you. I haven’t wanted to push because I know this mating is hard for you, but Mischa weakens. He will die before he forces you. I can’t let that happen, not to either one of you. I’ve told Sergei to send Mischa here. It’s time you two worked this out.”
“Look, just because you’re the Alpha doesn’t mean you can butt into my business.”
“Gwen, being the Alpha gives me every reason to butt in,” Grigori said. “You’re unhappy, we all see it, feel it, smell it even. Mischa pines for you. He isn’t eating. His older brother is worried. It has to stop. All of it. It’s time for you to be the strong woman I know you are. Fix things with your mate. Put your past behind you. If you don’t, Mischa will die and you will wish to follow him. Do you want him to die, Gwen? Would you punish Mischa for what another man did to you?”
Gwen groaned. It was all so unfair. What she did wasn’t right, but now after all this time, she didn’t know how to begin to fix her problems with taking a lycan mate, or truthfully, if she even wanted to.
“When does he arrive?” Her voice came out barely above a whisper.
“Tomorrow. Come to the house for dinner. Dmitry is sending several young ones from Siberia here to England for training, as well as a couple of single males looking for a mate. The dinner is to welcome them to England. Brencis is bringing Meadow. I believe you met her yesterday during the installation in Glastonbury.”
“But I’m supposed to be at work the next day. The drive . . .”
Grigori chuckled. “Why drive when you can Shadow Walk? Besides, as your boss, I can arrange for you to arrive a little later to the office. I won’t take no for an answer, Gwen.”
“You do realize that if he upsets me, I’m out of there.”
“I hope you fight your flight response and try, Gwen. Wasn’t there a moment when you first met Mischa that you were happy? You knew he could be trusted? Your wolf recognized her mate?”
Gwen thought back to that morning in the kitchen. All of the Sokolov brothers descended on her home in Montana. She’d fixed them breakfast. They’d come to help their brother, Sergei, and her little sister, Lindy. Mischa smiled at her. He helped her cook and serve the food. When he touched her, a little zing of electricity ran up her spine. Her wolf wiggled happily. She’d smiled and watched Mischa’s eyes light with appreciation. At that moment, she had been happy. Her thoughts returned to Grigori who waited on the phone.
“Yes . . . but…”
“Then you got scared because your wolf pushed you. You’ve overcome the fear of your wolf since being here in my pack. Am I wrong?”
Gwen thought again. She had made friends with her wolf since coming to England. Grigori, an excellent teacher and mentor, helped her learn to no longer fear turning into a rabid animal or that her wolf would control her mind.
“No, you aren’t wrong.”
“I’ll see you at dinner then. Wear something pretty and you will have Mischa more than eating out of your hand.”
Gwen laughed. “I’m not sure wolves eating out of your hand is a good thing.”
“Go back to sleep. No more nightmares. See you at dinner.” Grigori’s gentle tone eased the sound of his orders, and they were orders. Gwen smiled when the phone went silent. Too bad she couldn’t get rid of her nightmares by deciding to obey him.
§
“See you tomorrow, Gwen.”
Gwen waved at one of her coworkers and closed the door to her office. Walking out of the six-story office building into the evening sunlight, she pondered what to wear to tonight’s pack dinner. The outfit needed to make her look good without seeming too eager. She didn’t want Mischa to be disappointed in her, even when she wasn’t sure she wanted him for a mate. Her feelings were so convoluted, she didn’t know what to think.
She would Shadow Walk to the pack headquarters in Somerset tonight so the outfit also needed to be made of all natural materials or it would disintegrate with the passage through Shadow. Luckily, most of the clothes in Gwen’s closet were Shadow Walking safe.
Today she decided to walk to her apartment. Gwen didn’t need to hurry to get home to change, but that didn’t stop her from quickening her steps and weaving her way through the other workers on the busy street.
Her wolf rode her hard all day, wanting out to run and play. Gwen would see her mate tonight, and where the human might have trepidations, the wolf couldn’t wait.
Before coming to London, Gwen would have fought her wilder side, trying to keep it buried until she couldn’t control it any longer. Grigori’s tutoring and mentorship helped her embrace her wolf and make friends with her canine side. Gwen could now trust that her wolf only wanted to help and support her.
She had excelled at the Alpha’s training course, strengthening her mind and body, and gave the other pack members some competition. It still made her blush to change forms in front of others, but part of being a lycan meant being naked before and after shifting. Nobody thought anything untoward about it. Still, she wouldn’t be shifting tonight, so she could wear something nice and maybe wear hose or leggings to show off one of her assets.
Gwen climbed
the stairs to her third story apartment, waved at the security camera, and slipped inside, going straight to the kitchenette to start the electric kettle. A good cup of tea would boost her morale during the outfit picking process.
When Gwen first came to London, she worked in a teahouse, coming up with new mixtures of tea leaves. She’d gathered quite a following of patrons at the establishment. The owners soon became unpleasant and dismissed her because of money concerns.
That didn’t stop her love of all things tea, however. Picking up a tin, she inhaled the lovely bergamot aroma of a good Earl Grey and prepared a ball for brewing. That done, she slipped off her shoes and headed to the small wardrobe that contained her clothes in the corner next to the bed.
She opened the mirrored doors and stood back to study the different colors. With her dark hair, bold colors looked best on her. She took out the red silk dress and blue cotton knit skirt and matching blouse. She put them on the bed and then searched for silk hose and leather shoes to match each outfit.
The kettle clicked off and she hurried back to the counter to brew her tea. Letting the water steep, she held up, first, one outfit and then the other in front of the mirror.
“I wish Lindy were here,” she muttered to herself while blowing across the warm cup. Her sister would tell her which outfit looked best. Moving to London had been the first time Gwen left home and her protective family for longer than a night or two. She sipped the tea.
It had been a scary prospect, but one she enjoyed. Gwen wanted to explore the great big world waiting out there and for a Shadow Walker that was easier than for others. Her foster brothers had already taken her to many of the European capital cities and she thought to go to Moscow next. Lindy enjoyed her time there before she was kidnapped. Luckily, she had been rescued and taken home to Montana, her Siberian lycan mate in tow.
Mischa was from Siberia as well, the original home of the Lycans. She chuckled to herself. No matter how hard she tried, all thoughts led back to her mate.
The idea of seeing Mischa again made her heart beat fast. The part of her that wanted to hide under the bed, she ignored. She wasn’t a weak woman and could get through this. She didn’t have much choice as lycans mated for life. The mating bond proved that Mischa was the one for her. So one way or the other, they had to work something out, which meant not giving into her fears. She clutched the warm cup.
It took a while for Gwen to trust Grigori, but she soon realized what a fine man he was. So if she could trust him, a lycan male like her attacker, she could learn to trust Mischa. Their lycan sides would want to consummate and mark their mates. Could she handle a physical relationship with Mischa? That’s what worried her the most. She didn’t know if she could. Just thinking about it made her body tremble and her stomach ache. She put the tea down, unfinished.
The few dates she’d had since the attack hadn’t gotten past hand holding and kissing. Probably because no one felt right, or maybe because Gwen wasn’t ready to trust another man. Mischa let her leave Montana without a fight and never tried to force anything on her. He deserved a chance to see if they could work something out. Turning back to the outfits, she decided to go with the red dress.
She quickly changed and brushed her long black hair. Then turning off the lights in her apartment, she found a shadow that wavered near the floor. She knelt, and pushed her hands into the darkness. The cold of Shadow enveloped her fingers. She opened a doorway and stepped inside.
The dark Shadow landscape covered with mist seemed to move and tickled as it brushed against her skin. Gwen closed her eyes and visualized the kitchen in Grigori’s house.
Chapter Two
The kitchen came into view as if through a running watercolor painting. Gwen once more repeated her movements and opened a portal to walk through. Once back on the Earth plane, warm and wonderful smells permeated the air in the kitchen. Gwen’s stomach growled. She went to the stove and stirred a thick stew that bubbled in the pot. Rosie’s cooking always made her mouth water.
“Careful, love,” Rosie said, walking into the room with a stack of plates in her hands. “Don’t let it spit on your dress. That stew is hot.”
“It smells wonderful. Is there anything I can do to help?”
“Ah, thanks for asking. Could you take these plates to the table? Everyone is gathering in the sunroom. Miss Meli is in there now.”
“When is she not in there?” Gwen asked. Melisande was Grigori’s mate and female Alpha of England. The sunroom was her favorite room in the large Tudor building that once served as a royal hunting lodge. They both laughed.
“Hurry along now. They’re expecting you.” Rosie shooed her from the kitchen.
Gwen picked up the plates, glad for something to do before she faced the pack, and placed them in the dining room. From the number of dishes, there would be quite a lot of lycans joining them. She smoothed her dress with her trembling moist hands and put a pleasant smile on her face before walking to the sunroom entrance. She stood at the door a moment, afraid to go forward, but too stubborn to leave.
Brencis and Meadow spoke to a man who looked like he stepped out of a movie. He was gorgeous with striking cobalt blue eyes and thick black lashes. His dark hair fell at a rakish angle and his megawatt smile mesmerized.
“Watch out for that one,” Melisande said, coming up beside her. “He could charm the feathers off a bird. I’m glad you came, Gwen. I know you think we’re butting in, but Mischa isn’t well. You need to make this right. Come on, let’s find a place to sit.” They walked across the room.
“I’m going to try, Meli. I don’t want anything bad to happen to Mischa.”
An arm came around her shoulders, holding her tightly. “Who is this goddess that walks among us?” a male voice asked. The smell of male lycan overwhelmed her senses.
Gwen reacted. A quick grip of the wrist and a flip of the arm and the man who dared to touch her flew through the air. He landed on his back, an “oomph” escaping his lips.
Gwen stared down at the beautiful man she’d noticed before. She slapped her hand over her mouth as she gasped realizing what she’d done. Did she hurt him?
“Tolya! How dare you touch my mate? Gwen, are you all right?”
Gwen glanced up. Mischa walked through the crowd of people watching the spectacle while searching her face.
Melisande was right. His once robust physique appeared sickly and thin. His lovely pale blue eyes and light blond hair seemed dull. She couldn’t take her eyes off him. This was her fault. Their separation was slowly killing him. Her stomach lurched.
“Is she all right? I’m the one on the floor,” Tolya said. He winked at Gwen, breaking the tension. She couldn’t help but smile. Tolya was a charmer.
“Serves you right,” said a honey blond haired man coming up and clapping Mischa on the shoulder before reaching a hand down to help Tolya from the floor. “You’re always flirting with mated women. Finally, one of them put you in your place.” His hazel eyes twinkled with merriment.
“Too bad the lovely Gwen is taken,” Tolya said, brushing at his shirt. “I find myself smitten. Alas, how will I find a mate as perfect as her?”
“At least you admit that Gwen is taken. You need to look elsewhere smitten or not,” Mischa said, moving closer and taking Gwen’s hand. She let him; lycans were possessive creatures. So many males standing around her must drive Mischa crazy. It didn’t help her nerves either.
“Gwen, this is my good friend, Desya, and the idiot who thought to touch you is Tolya.” Mischa squeezed her hand.
“Like a moth to a flame, she drew me. I had no choice.” Tolya smiled. Melisande laughed and walked away from the group to where her mate spoke to an older man with brown hair.
“Tolya, I thought you were getting Meadow a drink,” Brencis said, walking up with his new mate.
“Ah, yes. Another goddess amongst us. Excuse me and I will fetch them immediately. Something for you, lovely Gwen?”
“No, thank you. I’m fine.”
/>
Tolya bowed low to both women and then turned toward the bar. Gwen pulled her hand from Mischa’s, her palms sweaty. He frowned.
“I wanted to thank you for helping install my new security system,” Meadow said. “Brencis wants me to be safe.”
“I love my work at Solovyov Security. It’s great to know you can help make people secure,” Gwen said, warmth filling her chest.
“Gwen has a natural talent to know where to place the different cameras and sensors. She’s the best,” Brencis said. Gwen’s cheeks warmed.
“Gwen, could we go for a walk in the gardens before dinner?” Mischa looked at her hopefully.
“I’m sure there is time for a little stroll,” Brencis said. “We could go with you.” He smiled at Meadow.
Gwen sighed. The smell of so many lycan males in the same room made her stomach ache even worse. Maybe getting outside would help.
“Okay. The gardens.”
Mischa smiled and motioned her to precede him. The large windows that made up the sunroom hid a small door. Gwen opened the exit and they all went into the evening air. The smell of roses immediately hit Gwen’s nose and she breathed deeply. Her stomach began to settle and she brushed her fingers over the petals. Meadow and Brencis strolled hand in hand away from the house toward the tree line.
“You like roses?” Mischa asked.
“Yes, most women do, but I also like other plants and flowers.”
“I’m not here to hurt you, Gwen. You know that, right?” Gwen looked at her mate. Her wolf wiggled with joy, happy to have him near. If only Gwen could feel as excited. Worry stamped Mischa’s face. Another twinge of guilt assailed her making her stomach grumble.
“I know why you’ve come, Mischa. I didn’t mean for you to become ill, but I might need more time. I hope you can understand.”
“I share your nightmares. Of course, I understand.”
Lycan's Mate: Book Twelve of the Siberian Volkov Pack Romance Series Page 2