Bad Boy Brit (A British Bad Boy Romance)

by Daire, Caitlin

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw her looking at me, but I kept my expression stoic and my eyes on the road. If I made eye contact with her, I would fall apart, and I couldn’t do that.

  “I saw her on a date with Dr. Banks. I knew it was suspicious, but I wanted proof first. I did some research on him, and it turns out that he had his medical license revoked in England for a scam similar to this one. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you right away, but I wanted to hear the truth from her first.”

  “She told you?” I asked, suddenly fired up with rage. “She actually admitted it to you?”

  “Yes,” she replied. “She knew it was over. Plus I think she’s drunk and high. She’d probably admit anything in that state.”

  I spun the car around that instant, swerving around to the other side of the road. All thoughts of anything else flooded from my mind as anger took over. Serra had spent the last few weeks putting me through fucking hell, and now she’d casually admitted to lying like it wasn’t a big deal…and not even to me? That bitch. She knew exactly what she was doing, she knew she was destroying me, and she didn’t even give a shit. I might have been an arrogant asshole to people in the past, but shit, I hadn’t done anything to deserve all of this, had I?

  Once I’d gotten used to the idea of becoming a father, I’d been so excited. Absolutely over the moon. Now that I was hearing that it was all lies, I didn’t even know what to do with myself. I was so damn angry. I was sad and confused, too, but in this moment, rage was what I felt the most.

  “What are you doing?” Riley asked, sounding a little scared. “Are you going back there? That’s probably not a good idea.”

  “This isn’t about PR right now, Riley,” I heard myself snapping. “This is about my fucking life being ruined.”

  “I know, but shouldn’t you take some time to think about it? Decide what you want to say?” She was sitting up higher in her seat now, desperate to reach out to me.

  “I know exactly what I want to say,” I said, skidding the car up towards the studio we’d only left a few moments before.

  I stepped out of the car and heard Riley running behind me as I strode up to the main building. Part of me wished she had stayed behind in the car. I adored Riley, but I didn’t want her around right now, to witness what was about to go down.

  “Where is she?” I said as soon as I entered the studio. “Where’s Serra?”

  I half expected her to hide from me, but she strutted out, bold as brass, clutching a bottle of vodka in her left hand.

  “Kaiden…was wondering when you’d show up,” she said. She swayed towards me, the stench of booze hitting me hard. “What’s up?”

  “What’s up? Are you fucking kidding me?” I snatched the bottle from her hand and waved it in her face. “I thought you were supposed to be fucking pregnant!”

  The film crew and other studio workers began to surround us, drawn in by the drama. I didn’t give a shit about that. Even as I heard Riley trying to tell me that someone was filming our exchange on their phone, I didn’t care. Fuck them—fuck all of them. Serra needed to hear this.

  “You lied. You made it all up. You were never pregnant. How the fuck could you do that to me?”

  “Well, you did sleep with me. You could have gotten me pregnant, but I guess your little swimmers must be shit.”

  I shook my head at her repulsive words. Jesus, she was messed up. She sneered a second later, plucking the bottle out of my hands and taking a swig from it.

  “How drunk are you, Serra?”

  She shrugged, and I continued to press her.

  “Tell me, Serra. I want the truth, and I want it now. Why did you do this? You’ve spent the last few weeks telling me and the media that I got you pregnant, and I’ve been made to look like a dick by everyone, and for what? Just to hurt me? You knew how excited I was to be having a kid.”

  “Oh, don’t be so pathetic,” Serra replied. “Do you know how you sound? Like a fucking girl. Yeah, I lied. There’s no baby. So if you want one so badly, why don’t you go and try it out with your boring, fat-assed PR bitch? She seems pretty desperate to jump on your tiny dick.”

  “Oh my god…” People were starting to exclaim their disgust at Serra’s awful behavior. She was obviously too high and drunk to care, but she’d just admitted everything in front of the entire film crew, and she was on the fast track to getting herself in some serious trouble, especially seeing as someone had been filming the entire exchange on their cell phone.

  Thank god for technology these days, right? Sometimes it was a curse, but in times like this it was a blessing.

  “Don’t ever contact me again,” I said before spinning on my heels and walking away. Confusing emotions poured me through in what felt like a deluge, and I didn’t even know what to think. I was sad, but how could I really be sad about a baby that had never existed? I hadn’t really lost anything.

  So why did it feel like I had?

  I stepped outside into the warm mid-afternoon air and sucked in a few deep breaths. It was a shit situation, but at least it was over now.

  Riley’s soft voice spoke out from behind me; an angelic tone in the abyss of misery I was currently stuck in. “Should we go home, Kaiden?”

  I turned to face her, trying to smile but failing miserably. “Yeah,” I replied. “Let’s get the hell out of here.”

  We drove back to Riley’s apartment in silence, aside from the odd directional instruction from her. My thoughts churned around and around in my mind, but they didn’t come to much of a conclusion. I wasn’t sure where I was going to go from this moment. When I’d thought I was going to be a father soon, my future had seemed scary but certain.

  Now nothing was certain.

  “It’s just here,” Riley said a moment later.

  We pulled up outside a modest-looking apartment building; the sort of place that made mine look ridiculous and over the top. I felt a little ashamed of my extravagance at that moment, and I wished I’d stuck closer to my roots. I wished I was still the person who lived next door to Riley, and I wished I’d grown up to be the kind of person she could truly respect.

  I wished so many things when it came to Riley.

  “Come on up,” she said. “We could probably both use a drink.”

  I glanced around as we walked into her apartment, drinking in the homely setting where Riley lived. The neat layout, tasteful furniture, shelves of books and framed photos on the walls seemed just like her, and I spent a moment wishing I’d done the same with my place, decorating it with love instead of money. I’d allowed the idea of prestige to consume me when having my home decorated, and that was stupid and fake, unlike Riley. She was the real deal.

  A bizarre tension started to fill the room, unsaid things and unanswered questions swimming around us both. I had no idea what to do, so I walked forward and grabbed Riley’s hands, holding them tightly to my chest.

  “I’m sorry about all of that,” I said quietly. “I’m sorry I acted like that back there.”

  The statement was so small compared to the reality of the situation, but I didn’t know what else I could say other than that I was sorry.

  “It’s all right, I’m sorry too. I know you must be hurting. I guess I’m mainly just sad because she actually has the chance to have children if she wants, and she uses that to punish others. I’ve basically just had all of my fertility choices stripped away from me, so now I’m a bit lost, and it makes me so mad that she could use you like that.”

  I wrapped her into my arms again, and she snuggled into my chest.

  We stayed like that for a while, trying to calm ourselves and comfort each other, and something suddenly occurred to me. It was probably a completely crazy plan, but if Riley was up for it, I was willing to carry it out.

  Hell, I was more than willing.

  I took a deep breath before speaking. “Riley, I have an idea,” I said slowly, still trying to find the right words to explain my thought process to her. “This is gonna sound completely nuts, but hear me o
ut. The doctor told you that you can either have a baby right now and then get the surgery, or you can get the surgery right away and just use a surrogate later in life…is that right?”

  She nodded. “Uh-huh.”

  “Well, I know you’d much rather have your own baby, rather than use a surrogate. So I could help you out, we could…”

  She looked up at me with an expectant look on her face as I trailed off for a second.

  “Go on,” she said, eyebrows knitting in confusion when I didn’t speak again right away.

  My mind was still all over the place, and deep down, I knew it was probably unwise to even think this, never mind say it out loud, but my dizzy confusion made it seem like it was actually going to be okay.

  I took another deep breath and finally spoke up again.

  “Why don’t we have a baby?”

  Chapter 13

  Riley

  “What?”

  I gasped at Kaiden’s words and slumped down onto the sofa. He seemed so excited about what he’d just said, but it was totally crazy. “Us? A baby?”

  “Yes. I’m serious. Why not have one with me?”

  My mind was still spinning with his words, so I didn’t reply just yet, and I simply gulped instead.

  “Ri, I already thought that I was going to have a baby with Serra—that made me realize that I’m ready. I want to be a father. More than anything,” he said. He stepped forward and knelt down to the level I was now sitting at before grabbing my hands and staring into my eyes. “Seriously, Riley, let’s do it.”

  “I don’t—” I began to speak, but he interrupted.

  “I know, I know, this might seem like I’ve gone insane.” He backed away from me, running his fingers through his hair. “But think about it. You want a child, I want a child, and we already know each other. I know we could parent well together. It just…it makes sense, doesn’t it?”

  He stared at me, desperate for me to agree; desperate for me to see his logic.

  I didn’t have a clue how to answer him. Did it make sense? In some ways, maybe, but in so many others…definitely not.

  “I wouldn’t have asked you if I wasn’t deadly serious. I wouldn’t screw around like that. I know how important this is.”

  He smiled weakly, sending all kinds of emotions soaring through my mind, and I wrapped my arms around myself, trying to hold myself together. Serra’s vicious words kept popping up into my mind—especially the comment about Kaiden and I having a kid together. When she’d said it, it had seemed crazy, but apparently it had sparked something inside Kaiden.

  I was still speechless, so Kaiden kept talking.

  “I think you’ve finally seen that I’m not the man everyone thinks I am. I could see it in your eyes when you saw me again for the very first time. You thought it too; same as everyone else. That I was a jerk, a player, an idiot. You were disappointed, of course you were.”

  “I…” I tried to argue, but he wasn’t going to let me get a word in edgeways.

  “I don’t blame you; I was acting like an idiot,” he said.

  I cringed at this. Was it really so obvious how I’d felt when we’d first seen each other again, after so many years apart? I certainly didn’t feel that way anymore, but he wasn’t allowing me to get a word in to say so.

  “But now you’ve seen the truth. You’ve seen that I’ll be a good dad. Let me do this for you. Let me get you pregnant. Let me help you the way you always helped me when we were kids.”

  He’d absolutely stunned me into silence. I had no idea what to think, never mind what I was going to do about it. Some of his words had been accurate—I did know what kind of man he was now, and I also knew we would be able to co-parent well together. We’d known each other for years, so I knew we’d find a way to make it work, despite the fact that we’d spent so much time apart.

  But was this what I really wanted? Was this how I wanted to have a baby…with a friend, rather than a partner?

  I stood up and paced around the room like a zombie, completely lost in thought. I could feel Kaiden watching me intently from the other side of the room, but he didn’t say anything. His idea wasn’t the sort of thing that I could decide for or against on the spot, but then again, time wasn’t exactly a luxury I had either, considering what my doctor had told me.

  Should I? Shouldn’t I?

  There were so many arguments against doing this, but I couldn’t deny that it could also be a good idea too, and when I hadn’t replied for a good five minutes, Kaiden finally got up and approached me, his eyes searching mine for an answer…an answer I still didn’t know how to give.

  “If I say yes, how would we do it?” I asked, slowly trying to piece at least a semblance of a thought together. “Like…with a turkey baster and a cup? I’m not really sure how it all—”

  Kaiden cut me off by pressing my back up against the wall and kissing me hard. Oh god.

  So that was how he wanted us to make a baby. No turkey basters or cups; purely the old-fashioned way. My mind fogged up even more, and my brain couldn’t have made a decision in that moment if my life depended on it. I was consumed by lust as his lips crashed down on mine; consumed by the desire I’d been bottling up for so long and by the concept of the future that he was laying at my feet.

  “Mm...” I murmured into his mouth, losing myself in the moment.

  Kaiden took that as confirmation that this was what I wanted, and he ran with it. He started to run his fingers up and down the curves of body, making me lose my mind even more as anticipation prickled my skin and sent heated desire coursing through my veins, and my brain finally decided to switch off completely, allowing my body to become consumed by fiery lust instead.

  And it felt amazing.

  An involuntary moan escaped my lips as I felt Kaiden’s erection pressing against my leg. God, he was unbelievably sexy, and he was all that I wanted right now. Of course, I’d admitted those things to myself in the past, but this feeling was something else. I didn’t just want him. I needed him. I was desperate to feel him inside me, and the wet heat between my legs was literally aching for him, screaming for him to take me over and over again.

  I threw my head back, allowing Kaiden’s lips to find my neck, and he peppered my skin with kisses whilst his fingers trailed over my thighs. I allowed him to guide me backwards until I fell back onto the sofa, finally finding something solid to hold on to. I remained sitting as still as a statue, gripping the chair beneath me as I watched him slowly tug his T-shirt over his head and reveal the sculpted abs that came from years of training. I’d seen them before, but never right here in my living room, and somehow, that made him look even better.

  “Wow…” I said as my eyes traced ever line and contour of his chest.

  He grinned before leaning over and climbing on top of me, and then his lips were on mine again. It still seemed so strange to me—Kaiden Cross, gorgeous bad boy, was kissing me.

  Again.

  I relaxed into him and our mouths parted, his soft tongue grazing mine. He tasted perfect, and I melted into his soft lips, just like I had the first time he kissed me. He reached out and touched my face gently, and voracious hunger welled up inside of me, more and more by the second. I wanted his hard body more than anything in that moment, and any hesitation about his seemingly crazy baby plan was forgotten. It felt right.

  I leaned further in and pressed myself into him. I felt like I was boiling over, every moment of fantasizing about his lips and body suddenly coming to a head. I wanted him more than anything as I felt his hands slowly pushing my top up, but when the cold air hit my skin, everything suddenly changed.

  This wasn’t right at all.

  “Wait,” I said, sobering up from the haze of passion. “No, stop. Wait a second.”

  “What’s wrong?” he asked, voice gruff with desire.

  Everything, I wanted to say.

  I couldn’t do this. I just couldn’t.

  As nice as it might have sounded, his plan wouldn’t work fo
r me. I wanted to have babies out of love, not like this. Kaiden and I were obviously deeply attracted to each other, considering how we were behaving right now, but there was no way he was in love with me, no matter how I felt about him.

  “Stop.” I pushed him away and stood up, smoothing my clothes down and trying to put myself back together. “Not like this.”

  Kaiden followed my lead and stood up too. “What do you mean?”

  “I can’t do this. You’re just reacting to what happened with Serra, thinking this will fix things. You’re mourning for the baby you aren’t having anymore. I can’t have a baby like this. I need it to be out of love.”

  “But—”

  “I don’t want my baby to be a mistake that we made in the heat of the moment like this. I want a real life partner to raise my future children with, not just a friend, no matter how close that friend is.”

  “No, it won’t—”

  “I’m sorry, I can’t.” I couldn’t let him get a word in, because he seemed to have a magical way of convincing me to do exactly what he wanted. After all, he’d almost managed to convince me to have a freaking baby with him within the space of ten minutes…

  “Riley, don’t walk away from this. Please.”

  He jumped up, grabbing my arm, but I shook him off. I couldn’t do this. I couldn’t even be around him anymore. He was offering me the world, but I couldn’t take it. It was just too much.

  My emotions began to get the better of me, and I just couldn’t keep them in anymore. Tears started to roll down my cheeks, and I could feel them spilling over my lips and chin, leaving a salty taste in my mouth. Panic was knotting in my stomach, my mouth was dry with fear and my heart was hammering so loudly that it was making my head hurt.

  “Riley, calm down. It’s me. You’re okay. Everything’s okay,” Kaiden said. “Let’s just take a moment to think about this. We can talk about it, work it out.”

  “No, we can’t,” I mumbled in response. I was dizzy now, and Kaiden was making this worse. I absolutely had to get away. “I have to go.”

  With that, I raced for the door and pushed my way outside.