Unorthodox Chemistry

by Lilah E. Noir

  The bell door rang just as I added the last touches.

  A few months ago, that sound would have caused me a severe panic attack. According to the Procedure, I had to take slow, careful steps to the door, peep through the hole and let the person in only after a verbal confirmation they were alone. I also had to have pepper spray or a knife in hand.

  That day, I simply left the lipstick case on the makeup table and went to open the door.

  Allie was standing on the threshold with her usual mischievous grin and a couple of steaming coffee cups.

  "A little treat before our road trip, Lina?" She smirked when I let her in.

  "Someone's trying to get into my good graces?" I rolled my eyes at her words and closed the door. Allie looked around and stepped inside in her usual style, like she owned the room. It was difficult not to admire her cat-like grace and confidence, even if she still made me feel uneasy.

  She was always playing some sort of mind game. What was she up to now?

  No matter how much I'd reassured Thomas I'd be fine, he was too apprehensive about me visiting Seth. We nearly got in a fight and finally we compromised that Allie would join me. He said that she had had an ulterior motive and that she really wanted to see that asshole Seth behind bars.

  Of course.

  Still, if Mistress Sheila hoped to dominate the situation she'd be out of luck.

  "I'm just being friendly." Allie handed me the paper cup and I accepted it, albeit reluctantly. "Coffee is always a good idea."

  It made me chuckle. Last time another woman had offered me reinforcement through a drink, it had been Katie, right before the boardroom meeting. We had two mini bottles of vodka and some girl talk. Could I be as relaxed with Allie at all?

  Either way, she was right. Coffee was always a good idea. When I brought the cup to my lips, it surprised me how good it tasted.

  "I have to say this is exquisite. So, you're not a Starbucks kind of girl?" I smiled at her and sipped some more.

  Allie laughed and took the lid from her cup.

  "I'm a caffeine junkie so I'm not pretentious most of the time. When I'm out of caffeine just about anything will do. I get this elixir here from a small bakery in my neighborhood. They make the best blends ever. I keep it only for special people."

  "So that's your version of an olive branch?" I raised my eyebrows at her and pointed to the kitchen island. Allie didn't hesitate before she settled down. She took off her baseball cap and put it on the counter.

  "Olive branch?" That amused smirk of hers could be unnerving. "I didn't think of it that way. As far as I'm concerned, we have nothing to fight over."

  "Oh, really?" I sat next to her and left the coffee cup on the counter. "Last time we saw each other, you manipulated both Thomas and me. You forced us into a situation neither of us were prepared for and well, technically, you stole my boyfriend."

  Allie didn't even flinch and drank some more of her coffee.

  "Stole? That implies he resisted. Trust me, Lina, there was very little resistance when he stripped for me. Besides, let's face it... He looks better tied on my leash than by your side." She leaned back on the stool and tilted her head. "Would you have gotten back together with Thomas if it hadn't been for me?"

  "Unlikely," I admitted. "I appreciate you volunteering to be my wing woman, even if I'm not sure what your motivation is. It might be difficult for a Domme to do it but today, I'll lead. It's between Seth and me."

  "Of course." She didn't change her expression. "Trust me, I have no intention of babysitting you, Lina. I'm here for the show and to see that prick locked away for good. It'd be a lot of fun to watch you rip him a new one."

  "I'm glad we're on the same page. I should also thank you for your help with Thomas. There were probably better ways to handle the situation but honestly, I can't think of any." I found myself relaxing in her company. Maybe I wouldn't trust her one hundred percent but I felt we could become friends.

  "Speaking of that night at The Fortress, I must thank you for bringing Nate," Allie said after taking a generous sip of coffee. "He's a real treat."

  I narrowed my eyes at her and used my best purring voice.

  "Should I threaten you with breaking your legs if you ever mess with him?"

  Her dark eyes sparkled with amusement.

  "I'd love to see you try. I haven't had a catfight with a plucky submissive like you for ages. You'd be a fun opponent. I'm sure even Thomas wouldn't mind watching me break you."

  "Perhaps I'd be the one breaking you." I laughed quietly. I wouldn't know how to dominate her sexually to save my life but the verbal sparring was pleasant enough. "Seriously, he's a good person, and..."

  "Relax." Allie raised her hands and stretched like a lazy cat. "I'll only mess with him in ways he enjoys. He'll be amazing once I train him to perfection."

  There was a certain dreamy note in her voice and I couldn't help myself.

  "Is it just me--" I finished my coffee, "--or does Mistress Sheila sound a little infatuated?"

  "Little tease." She slapped me on the wrist. "If--"

  "Let me guess. If I were yours, you'd send me to the corner and punish me then make me to go to bed without an orgasm."

  Allie shook her head.

  "I understand why Thomas has so much fun punishing your ass, Lina."

  Ten minutes later I was driving down the highway on the way to San Quentin, with her in the passenger seat. She had her red baseball cap back on. The initial tension between us had melted and soon we were chatting as if we had known each other for years.

  "How are things with Thomas?" she asked, staring out the window. "Most of the time when I see him, he's glowing so I assume you must be on the right track?"

  It'd been a month since Thomas and I officially got back together.

  "Well..." I paused and stole a glance at her profile. "We're in the honeymoon phase. It feels so good to go out with him and not worry someone might see us. Do normal couple stuff. Just... Do you promise it'll stay between us?"

  "Is it serious?" Allie looked up at me from beneath her cap.

  "No, just... I don't want to bring it up with him again. I risk turning into an insufferable nag, but..." How much could I possibly tell her? "It's great I can date Thomas in the open but I hate that he had to quit the company. It feels like he's being punished through no fault of his own."

  "Lina, he's my friend but you do realize that the picture leak was pretty much his fault," she said.

  "You're right." I nodded and squeezed the steering wheel. "That's exactly what irritates me. People who went against him weren't concerned with the information safety. All they give a damn about is that he got promoted because he was fucking the boss. At least that's what they think."

  "Seriously, does that surprise you?"

  "No, but I don't have to be happy about it." My cheeks went a little red. "I miss having him around the office. Not only because he's my lover. He was really good at his job. On the other hand, I understand why he doesn't want to come back, and... You know what, forget it. I'll let things follow their natural course."

  "I may have an idea how to fix the whole situation."

  We were at a traffic light and I used that moment to turn to her. Allie rubbed her chin and stared at the traffic outside.

  "Oh? Do you want to share?"

  "Not yet." She smirked at me. "It's still a work in progress, and... I'd like to discuss it with Thomas and you first when I clear the details. I'll need your input but so far, I'd rather not say anything more."

  "Come on, seriously?" I pouted and shook my head. "You can't leave me hanging like that. Give me a little hint?"

  "My lips are sealed." Allie cracked an evil grin.

  "You damned tease."

  "That's what makes me such an effective sadist." She burst into laughter. "No worries, Lina. You'll find out when the time comes."

  Bitch. No wonder she and Thomas were best friends.

  It was easy to be calm, cool and totally badass in the sa
fety of my apartment, but the moment we approached the prison's outskirts, the nerves began to get to me. Could I face the monster who haunted my nightmares?

  The waiting time and all the hoops we had to go through before the visit drained my energy. A lump of nervousness knotted in my stomach and I felt ready to throw up at one point.

  Someone's tender hand reached out and grabbed mine for a squeeze. I realized I'd been staring at my lap the entire time in the waiting room. Allie gave me a gentle, reassuring smile I never expected to see someone from like her.

  "You got it, Lina. Remind yourself that when you're done with him, you'll walk out of here. He'll be the one rotting over the next twenty years. He can't reach you."

  Her words didn't ease my anxiety in any way, and just made the lump tighten. It was paranoid, yes. Seth was in a strictly guarded state prison. This time he'd be the one in handcuffs. There was no rational reason for me to worry.

  So why didn't her confidence make me feel better?

  I didn't voice my concerns with Allie and just held her hand instead. Suddenly, I was grateful to Thomas for asking her to come with me. Still, I couldn't lean on her when I faced Seth.

  Pull yourself together. You've been through worse.

  When I heard our names called, I got up on steady feet and walked to the door of the visitor's room at a calm pace. Allie followed me. The slight unease was still there in my stomach but I pushed it away.

  Thomas and I had a date later that evening. I'd have more than enough time to relax and allow myself to be vulnerable. Right then I had to be strong.

  After ten minutes of anxious waiting, two prison guards brought Seth inside. It struck me how well he looked. Part of me hoped he'd have met predators of a higher caliber in prison. I wanted him to be sad and broken.

  In hindsight, it was naive of me to think so.

  If there was anyone who could thrive in that type of environment, it was Seth Anderson.

  His hazel eyes looked me up and down with that savage gleam I remembered from my abduction. His dark hair had grown to shoulder-length and he had a thick beard, as bushy as the thick eyebrows that framed his eyes. Maybe it was because I hadn't seen him for a while but he seemed bigger and more muscular than I remembered him. Seth must've decided that time in prison would be well used for a workout. His arms and torso were bulging in the gray prison uniform.

  Seth's physique had always intimidated me but right then it was as if he had the muscular, bulgy frame of a savage, prehistoric beast.

  He could have passed for ruggedly handsome if it hadn't been for my knowledge of who he was and what he did to me.

  The huge blue bruise with a touch of yellow around his eye took a toll on his good looks.

  "Oh, Lina," he said with the affectionate tone of a man seeing their sweetheart after a long separation. His voice sounded absurdly sincere, as if I were really his beloved girlfriend. "I missed you so much. I nearly cried with happiness when I heard you wanted to visit me."

  The guards pointed at the panic button and told me not to hesitate to use it if the prisoner got aggressive. I was allowed fifteen minutes to talk to him.

  "How is my favorite whore doing?" he said in a mocking voice. The sickening affection disappeared as soon as he, Allie and I were alone. Seth didn't even notice my companion.

  "That's a lovely piece of jewelry you have there, Seth." I didn't even flinch and just nodded at his bruise. My heart was pumping like mad. "It looks good with your eyes."

  "Oh, this old thing?" He smirked and ran fingers across his cheekbone. His cruel eyes lit up and took on a dreamlike stare. "Just a flesh wound. You should've seen what happened to the other guy. Trust me, one week in solitary confinement was worth the sight of that pig wailing and choking on his own blood."

  So, Seth had finally found his natural habitat.

  "I'm glad to hear they give you enough recreation." I gave him my best sweet, fake smile.

  Allie chuckled next to me.

  "I don't complain but I'm getting bored." He bared his teeth and rattled the cuffs around his wrists. "Hearing from you was the most exciting thing that's happened in ages. So why are you here? You finally realized what your role in life is?"

  I gritted my teeth and forced another smile.

  "Why, of course, baby. Haven't you figured it out? I'm here to drop down on one knee and offer you my hand and my company."

  "That would be smart of you. One day you'll submit. The earlier the better." Seth sounded so deadly serious it made my blood freeze. I took a deep breath and paused to think over my answer. He continued with the same insane smile. "You'd really make my day if you'd just take these off--" The cuffs clattered again as he shook his hands, "--and put them on yourself so I can make your ass bleed. You'll love it."

  I didn't say anything and gave him a cold stare.

  "Why are you here, Lina?" His voice turned smooth and velvet-like, way too seductive for a wild animal like him. "You dumped Thomas, didn't you? He can no longer give you what you need. Maybe that's what I should do, take you by force right here. The lazy assholes here will not help you."

  Allie cleared her throat. The baseball cap still covered most of her face.

  "It won't be so easy this time," she said in a low, altered voice. If I heard her without seeing her, I'd never guess it was Allie. "The lazy assholes will be the least of your problems if you choose to misbehave."

  "Oh?" He laughed out loud and turned to Allie. "Now, who might that be? Maybe your dyke girlfriend? Did you bring me another slave to amuse myself with? Really, Lina, seeing you all dressed up like that is enough of a gift."

  "You aren't as tough as you think you are. I could pin you down to the floor in five minutes, squealing like a five-year-old," she said with a low, growling voice.

  "Who are you? I know you." He narrowed his eyes.

  "It's not important who she is." I kicked Allie under the table and she looked at me in surprise. "As for Thomas and me... That's for me to know and for you to obsess over. I'm not here to explain myself to you. I'm here because I gave you too much of my time. I let you mess with my mental health even from behind bars. From this day on, you have no control over me."

  "Ha..." He was still staring at Allie with a curious smile and drumming his fingers. Seth turned his gleaming eyes to me. "You came to see me personally because you need closure? That's a hell of a lot of effort for someone you want to leave behind. We know the truth, slave."

  "Why don't you tell me your distorted version of the truth... Master?"

  I was shaking on the inside in spite of my best attempt to emulate my feelings from the night with Thomas, that willpower and strength.

  Once you walk out of here you'll be free. Focus. Don't let him in. Lock the bastard out of your thoughts where he belongs.

  "You've been thinking of that night at the warehouse a lot." He placed his hands on top of the table and slid them further. It took all my strength not to flinch back. "Your mind may be telling you not to but you do, and each time you make yourself cum over it, the guilt gets worse."

  I remembered that dark night at my beach house and the twisted pleasure of my debasement. How even the cruel bite of the cane and the pressure of the knife turned me into a sopping wet nymphomaniac.

  Seth kept talking and the insane smile didn't leave his face.

  "You don't even try to deny it. I remember it. I was beating you, humiliating you, treating you like you were subhuman, and you were wet. How long can you satisfy yourself with Thomas' child play? You may be acting strong now, but deep inside you're a submissive, groveling whore, and you want someone to break you. Why don't you drop your charges and admit we were having a lover's quarrel?"

  Allie tensed next to me but I gave her a sign with my hand not to interfere.

  "Listen to me very carefully, Seth," I hissed to attract his attention. "You might take me by force if you get the chance but I'll never, ever kneel for you or let you touch even the tip of my boots."

  "Like I care
for your weak, pathetic willpower or your voluntary submission." He laughed. "Once you're chained to my wall, none of that'll matter."

  "Even if that is so, it's over," I said simply. "I'm leaving that room. I'm leaving you behind. I'll never think of you again. I won't mention your name again. I won't let you play with my mind. I'll leave you to rot in here."

  He didn't look convinced but I couldn't have cared less. My skin was burning and I was right on the edge of giving in to his provocations. I resisted the panic and all those fears that begged me to nestle comfortably with them.

  "You know what else, Seth?" I smirked at him and whispered so low only he could hear me. We were far away from each other but my whisper reached him. "I'm a proud submissive. You can't take that away from me no matter what you do. I love to be on my knees, to service, to be a slut. The difference, Seth, is..."

  I got up from the uncomfortable plastic chair and walked to the door. Allie did the same and followed me without a word.

  "Only certain men get the privilege of seeing and experiencing that side of me." I curled my lips into a cruel smile. "I hope that someday you'll get to experience your submissive side... when you meet an even bigger predator than you. Farewell, Seth."

  "Lina," he called after me. "Don't get too cocky. You might be on top right now but be careful. Things can change very fast and not in a way you'd enjoy. If I were you, I'd be more careful. Watch your step."

  I didn't reply. I didn't even turn back or acknowledge him. The last thing I heard before Allie closed the door behind us was, "I'll see you sooner than you think, Lina. I told you you'll never be safe again."

  Allie and I walked away to the exit, and I realized I was no longer shaking.

  A sense of peace and calm washed over me and I smiled.

  Everything would be fine.

  Life could go on and I finally had the freedom to navigate it.

  Freedom. I hadn't had that sensation in a long time, maybe my entire life.

  Seth's words and threats and all the shame faded like the distant echo of the voices down San Quentin's hallways.