Crocodile Spirit Dreaming - Possession - Books 1 - 3

by Graham Wilson

  She stopped reading when she reached those words, it was too painful and she did not want to hear this now. If she had a match perhaps she would burn this page now, never fully read. Instead it burned into her hand, demanding her further attention, demanding she read and know it all.

  Almost reluctantly she picked the paper up and read on.

  “You probably wonder why I say this now when I could not say it to your pleading eyes just a short while ago. I cannot answer as I do not know. All I know is that I could not give you false hope for a future together in this life, to do that would have been a worse lie.

  There was a time yesterday, when I was angry with you. Then I thought maybe I could kill you as I killed those others. But I knew, in that instant when you tried to jump in front of that truck, that it was impossible. In a choice between me and you, you must live; my life is of less importance.

  I am sorry my actions have frightened you, I have seen fear of me in your eyes and I hate that. I understand why. Now I must hurt you no more. That leaves only one way.

  Now, with the first light of dawn, that time of choice has come and must be acted on.

  I have just looked at your beautiful face as you lie sleeping. It is peaceful and I hope your dreams are good. I hope you dream of happy times with me, there are so many memories of you in my mind now and the joy will never go away, it will be me last memory. I remember riding on the beach, sharing a helicopter dance, your eyes as I gave you the pendant and the ring. But most of all I remember loving you, holding your body in my arms, your hair in my face, loving you over and over and over again. While I have had you like this so many times, as I watch you sleep, I ache to feel you again this way, just one more last time.

  Before I write a final goodbye, I must tell you a few practical things. In my briefcase, combination 2153, you will find two things which I would like you to have. Do not give them to others, at least not until you have decided for yourself what you want to do with them. The first is a pouch of precious stones. They are mine, bought and paid for in full by me. They are all of high quality. I think their value is between one and two million dollars. They now belong to you. The second is my diary. It tells of what I have done over the last five years. I ask that you read it so you know the good and bad of me. After this you may give it to the police or pass information in it to the families of others whose death I am responsible for. I wish I could feel guilt over them but I do not, I did not set out with the purpose of harming any of them. However you must judge this and me with your own eyes and conscience.

  I have made a will. It is set between the back leaf and cover of my diary, inserted into this space which is glued closed. It has been witnessed by two friends I trust. It leaves all I possess to you, and gives the details of how to access what I own.

  Now all is said and I must say goodbye. I leave this where I hope you will find it, alongside your English passport which contains a picture of your smiling face. I have just touched and kissed this one last time. I would kiss the real face, but that may awake you too soon.

  Now I go to the water’s edge. My own crocodile totem will to talk to the crocodile spirits of this place until our spirits are as one. Then I will swim out to join the crocodiles and offer my body to them as a gift. I will wait until your eyes are open, before I go. I would rather not give you this pain, but you must see me go to know I have gone, so as to have freedom from me again.

  If any of me remains when it is done, I ask that you place the ashes of these parts in the place of the rainbow spirits, that place we looked at and loved together, when first we walked in the desert. There my spirit will walk in freedom, along with many other spirits of this land, holding forever an image of your love amongst the twilight colours.

  I wish you a good and happy life with someone else, who will love you, and who you will love in return, in the same way that we have loved. I am blessed to have had this time with you.

  All my love

  Mark

  Susan sat there with tears streaming down her face. It was all she had wanted from him in life, that full and unequivocal statement of his love. But now those words spoken between them, face to face, could never be said.

  She felt a tide of bitter disappointment rise up within her. She would have taken him as he was; they could have together shared the joy of their child, and have lived a happy year or two together, perhaps longer. Then if the past needed to be resolved they could have tried to find a way through this together as well. But instead he had chosen self-sacrifice over opportunity, and she had aided and abetted him through murder. Yet she loved him still and must honour his wishes, to return to the story of his life and then to decide what to do with this information. It did not, it could not ever fit with a life with David.

  In Mark’s final sentence he wished her to have a good and happy life with someone she loved in the same way she had loved him. She could not see David’s face filling that space. She knew it was only stated as a wish, but nonetheless she must seek to honour that wish, both for herself and Mark. And perhaps it was also good for David, that she not entrap him in something less perfect than that.

  A minute of two must have passed as Susan sat crying silently. She became aware that a stewardess was looking her with concern. She took out a tissue and wiped her eyes and nose, then smiled back at her saying. “It is alright, really. I was just reading something from a past life and it made me very emotional.”

  Chapter 13 – Wedding Plans

  By the time Susan touched down in Heathrow she was no longer so certain that she should break off her engagement with David. It was again like she had returned to being two people, one of dreams and subconscious and one of day to day reality.

  She had promised this man she would marry him, nothing had changed her promise, and plans were now well underway for it all to happen. Her family and friends were all excited about this promise of a trip to Australia. After she and David had told them from Australia of the wedding date they were all busily arranging flights and holidays, asking her about places to visit and things to do in Sydney and side trips to other parts of Australia.

  It was like a juggernaut that was off and running and she felt powerless to stop it. Most of her conscious mind wanted it to happen and she hated the thought of derailing all these plans. And Mark had given her his blessing to be with someone else and wished her happiness. Why should she not take him literally and go off and be happy with this man.

  There to meet her at the airport were her family, as from last time but also Anne, smiling and looking vibrantly beautiful and excited.

  “O Suz, I can’t wait to go to Australia and be your bridesmaid. Is there really a younger brother who is half as gorgeous as David, if so I can’t wait to meet him, will he be the best man? What dress do you want me to wear, have you chosen your dress yet, how should we do our hair, shall we have a hens night before we go away?”

  Susan held up her hand, “Whoa, so many questions, so fast, I can’t take it all in. Why don’t I just say yes to everything and then we can sit down tomorrow and talk about it properly.”

  A week went by, she had met with Anne twice, and they had more or less agreed on dresses and other wedding things that they needed to do. Her parents had come on board easily, they both liked David, much preferred him to Edward and, though they were a bit surprised how fast it was all happening, they would support her in what she wanted.

  At first her father grumbled about the wedding location, not in the local church, with all her own extended family and friends present, but in Australia, and also said he wanted to pay a big part of the wedding costs, they were well off.

  Susan understood this, partly family pride, partly his practical self. She said, “David and I are happy for you to pay a share of the wedding costs, but we also want to pay our own share.

  “David and his family are very well off, that’s how they talk about it, the same way as you. But really they are seriously wealthy; they just don’t like to boast. David ha
s also done very well in business himself over the last five years and has that income as well.

  “The reason we want to get married in Watson’s Bay is because that is where we really got to know each other, and we love the church and the feel of the place.

  “So what I most want is for all my family and for as many of my friends as possible to come out and join us. So, if you want to help with money how about you help pay for airfares for more of my extended family, particularly for your sister, my Scottish aunt, and cousins to come out. You know how much we have enjoyed all our trips up there, and they are not so well off as our family is.

  And then there is Mum’s brother, wife and his children. If you and Mum could use your powers of persuasion, and maybe a bit of money to get as many of them as possible on a plane and perhaps even rent a big house for everyone to stay in for a week or two in Sydney so everyone could have a lovely holiday, that is more than enough.”

  In the end she won her father and mother around. Her father gave her a cheque, on behalf of them both, for ten thousand pounds for Susan and David to spend as they liked, whether on a wedding present or wedding costs. As well as that he was now organising bookings for at least eight members of her extended family to come, along with arranging for a big house in Sydney for them all to stay in for a week before they all went their own ways on their own travels.

  Susan knew it would be a lovely time, nights singing songs, telling stories and playing board and card games with all her cousins, as they had done throughout the shared childhoods.

  She was so busy that she had barely thought of Mark and his letter, though she remembered her promise to herself to read Mark’s diary. It was there in her to do list, though postponed for now.

  She had given notice to finish her laboratory job a week before she was due to fly out, to give a week to pack and make all those last minute arrangements. Then she had almost a week in Sydney before the wedding took place. That meant she now had four weeks until she finished work. It was not much time but she felt she was getting well organised and it would be enough.

  On the Friday night of the first week back she met up with Maggie and Jane in the city. Anne came with her. It was a night of reminisces, diving in Cairns, jokes about former boyfriends. Everyone professed envy at her future.

  Only one minor hiccup arose. Maggie asked her, totally innocent? “Did you ever hear again from that Mark guy, you know the one you went diving with and you seemed a bit keen on? You told me that day in Kuranda that he had asked you out the night before but you had already gone out with us and missed his invitation. The way he looked at you on the boat I think he had the hots for you. The way you talked about him, the next day it was as if you wished you had connected up and had an Aussie outback affair.

  Everyone was looking at Susan. She felt flushed and did not know what to say.

  Anne came to the rescue. “She did meet her Aussie bloke, David from Sydney. So obviously the other did not amount to anything. Can’t you tell she is embarrassed by the subject?”

  With that everyone broke into fits of giggles and the moment passed by. The night ended with promises to keep in touch. Anne invited them to Susan’s hens’ night, set to occur on the night she finished work.

  She was just home from work on the Monday night of her second week, when the phone rang. As neither of her parents were near she picked it up. The voice was very familiar and she realised with a shock it was Edward. She was surprised that it actually felt good to hear his voice, her anger was long gone. He gave her his congratulations on her upcoming marriage, but she knew there was something else and he got to it in a minute.

  He said. “I got a strange call today from Scotland Yard and a Detective Inspector Brent. He wanted to talk to you, he said that he had got this address and phone number from the passport office, it must be the current address on your passport. Anyway he said he needed to talk to you urgently and left a number for me to pass on. He would not say what it was about, so I gave him your parents address and phone number as I don’t have your current mobile number. He may have already tried to ring, but I thought I should let you know.

  Next morning, soon after she arrived at work she remembered and pulled out the number. It was probably just some minor inquiry she thought, though deep down she could feel terror bubbling, please let it not be that!

  The number rang straight through and on the second ring a pleasant voice answered, “Detective Brent here.”

  Susan identified herself. As she spoke her name she could feel something settle over the line, like a huge deadening weight.

  He said, “I need to talk to you with extreme urgency. It is a very serious matter and you may wish to arrange legal representation. It is probably best if you come into our office here in Scotland Yard, though I could come somewhere to meet you if it is really necessary.”

  Susan felt gobsmacked, her mind part frozen. She needed to think, to get her bearings. She said, “Could you tell me what it is about please?

  Detective Brent replied “I am not at liberty to discuss it over the phone, beyond saying that it concerns the trip you made Australia in July to August of this year. We understand you met a Mr Mark Bennet on this trip. Would you be able to come in and see us today? It is really most important that you do.”

  Chapter 14 - Scotland Yard

  Susan had declined an offer of a pick up by a police car. She had said that she would catch a taxi to Scotland Yard, within an hour, as soon as she could organise a few critical things.

  Now she sat back as it stopped and started through the London traffic. She needed to calm her panicked mind, perhaps this was less bad than it seemed. But she must think clearly now. She wondered if she should call Anne and ask her to find a lawyer to attend. But she did not want anyone else involved in this until she had some idea what it was about.

  Perhaps Mark had been reported as missing and someone who knew they had been together and remembered her name had said they had been travelling together. That was most likely it.

  She would say they had travelled together for a while, admit to having an affair with him but then say that she had left him at Timber Creek, he said he was going to Western Australia for work and she was going in the opposite direction to Darwin to catch her plane. The she would say she was given a lift to Darwin with some she knew only by their first name. She must decide on that name.

  Her cousin was Robert Burns, the name Robert would do, Rob. If she was pushed hard about this person’s identity she could say she thought the second name was Burns but was not sure. She could say he was driving a four wheel drive station wagon, she could not remember the type but the colour was dark blue. It was easy to remember this story, yes she could hold it together, it was simple and consistent.

  She would say Rob parked outside where they had breakfast. Mark was inside for a meeting and she had said goodbye to him then come outside, looking for a way to get to Darwin. She had got chatting to Robert, he said he lived in Darwin and had offered her a lift. He seemed OK so she had taken up the offer. He had dropped her in the city late in the afternoon. Rob had seemed a nice guy, he had a wife and two kids and lived somewhere in Darwin, was on his way back from the west. They had chatted and he had been friendly, but nothing more. That was all she knew.

  Then she realised she would have to account for a day in Darwin, perhaps a vague, stopped at a backpackers in the middle of the city, the name escaped her. That would do and when she got home she could Google some names and also learn some basic facts about the city. She could say she had slept most of the next day as she had been tired from the night on the Victoria River and the next morning she had just flagged down a taxi in the street to take her to the airport for her ten o’clock flight, going early as they would know her check in time.

  Suddenly Susan realised that the taxi was no longer moving. She was at her destination. She paid the driver. She realised that she had created a whole imaginary web of lies in her mind. She must be careful; already her concoc
ted story was getting tangled.

  She took a deep breath, she must stop having flights of fancy, let them do the talking, see what they had to say. People got themselves into trouble when they started rambling.

  She went up to the counter and asked to see Detective Brent. In less than a minute she was shown to a meeting room. Two people came in, a smallish solid man and a slim and stylish lady. She felt she should smile a greeting but there was no humour in their demeanour.

  They introduced themselves, Detective Inspector Michael Brent and Detective Sergeant Rebecca Lacey. She introduced herself, then sat back to wait, steeling herself to appear calm, though her heart was racing.

  She thought they would get this interview underway by telling her why they had asked to see her. But instead they went through a few formalities, first telling her that the interview was being recorded. Then they told her that whatever she said could be used as evidence and confirmed she did not wish to have a lawyer present. She shook her head at this question. There was a longish pause.

  Finally Susan, directing her gaze at Detective Brent, said. “You asked me to come and see you, indicating the matter was extremely urgent, and not able to be dealt with on the phone. Could you please tell me why?”

  She sensed a glance of admiration from the Sergeant Lacey, an increased respect for her composure perhaps.

  Detective Brent looked at her, seeming mildly annoyed and flexed his fingers. Finally he replied. “Thank you for coming in Susan. We have been asked to investigate a matter by the Australian police, in fact by the Northern Territory Police. They have asked us to interview you and put a series of questions to you about your knowledge of and relationship to a Mr Mark Bennet, of Alice Springs.

  “Mr Bennet has disappeared and they are trying to ascertain his whereabouts.