Dance of a Lifetime

by Frank Downey

  Sophie just stared in disbelief. Jessie cracked up. "Dirk, but Dork is close enough, believe me."

  "Right," Ellen continued. "I also know that your previous boyfriends were assholes. Assholes out of bed tend to be assholes in bed. It takes a special guy to help a girl reach orgasm. Believe me, I know. Warren's a special guy. So, I put two and two together--added by the fact that you are glowing like a small sun--and made a guess."

  Sophia still couldn't believe it. "Since when did you get so open minded?"

  Ellen laughed, "I always have been to some degree. Listen, the drugs and booze worry me, and your inability to use the brains that God gave you in school frustrates me more than you could possibly know. But I know what hormones are. I have them too, you know. I wasn't much older than you are now when I lost my virginity." Sophia stared. She never knew that. "No, I wasn't really upset you were having sex--although I would have preferred you had waited. No, I was upset with who you were having sex with. I knew Scott was bad news from day one. Not that you listened to me."

  Sophia looked down. "I should have. Boy, should I have."

  "Ah, well, no use crying over spilled milk--or broken plates." They all laughed. "Trust me, dear, I have no such premonitions about Warren. He treats you like gold."

  "That he does. Mom, you're amazing. Thanks for being understanding."

  "Well, you should try me more. I'm more understanding than you think. You just never communicate. That's why I brought it up. At least I got a rise out of you."

  Sophia laughed. "That you did. I think I'm purple right now." She sighed. "I have to clean this up, I suppose. Where's the broom and dustpan?"

  "Hall closet."

  Sophia turned towards the door. "Hey, Soph?" Jessie called. "Was your mother right? Did Prep Boy actually give you your first orgasm last night?"

  Sophia stopped at the door, looked back at them, smiled, and said. " My first... and my second... and my third!" and then walked down the hall.

  Jess and Ellen looked at each other in amazement. "Oh, Soph," Jess said. "You don't suppose that Prep Boy might perhaps have a friend, do you?"

  * * *

  It was a few hours later. Jessie had gone home, and Sophia had spent some time in her room reading. She came out to the kitchen, fixed a pot of tea, poured herself a cup, and wandered out to the living room, where her mother was watching TV.

  "Made a pot of tea if you want some."

  "Actually, that sounds lovely." Ellen went to the kitchen, grabbed a cup, filled it, and went back to the living room. "Mmmm," she sipped. "Earl Grey?"

  "My favorite."

  "Some things never change." Sophia chuckled. "What are you reading?" Sophia showed her the book. "A Comedy Of Errors? Shakespeare? I'm impressed, Sophie."

  "Blame Prep Boy and his evil influence on me. He's got me hooked on Shakespeare, of all things."

  Ellen smiled. "He's got you reading again, he's got you skating. Jesus, what else of your virtuous past has he managed to dredge up?"

  Sophia laughed. "Well, after we did... you know... last night, we came down here and he thoroughly whipped my behind at chess. Boy, am I rusty at that. But it was fun to play."

  "Well, I'd bet your mind wasn't completely on the chess game."

  "That's no excuse, because neither was his. It might have been my first orgasm last night, but it was his first anything."

  Ellen stared. "Warren was a virgin?"

  "Oh, he was more than a virgin. He'd never had his hand up a girl's shirt before last night. He went from your basic kissing to boinking me all in one night."

  "And he made you come three times???????"

  "I'm telling you, Mom, the boy is good."

  "How did he last so long, if he was a virgin? That's unheard of!"

  "Oh, only the last orgasm was that way. First two were foreplay."

  "Ay yi yi."

  "Don't I know it." She took a sip of her tea, and sighed. "I guess I can't quite believe that I'm not even fifteen years old yet and I'm discussing graphic details of my sex life with my Mother."

  Ellen looked at Sophia wryly. "Sophia, any time that I can get you talking to your mother about anything is a good thing.:"

  Sophia thought about that for a minute. She sipped her tea, and put her book down. She stared into space for a minute, and then said, softly, "I guess I've been pretty rough on you the past couple of years."

  Ellen looked at her daughter. "It's been mutual. Neither of us have been communicating. There have been so many things I should have told you, long before this--things about myself. It might have helped, but I didn't know how to go about it."

  "What are you talking about, Mom?"

  "I remember the first guy that made me orgasm. I was seventeen. Like I said, I lost my virginity shortly after my fifteenth birthday, but it took one special guy to make me orgasm."

  "And you fell head over heels."

  "You got it."

  "What happened?"

  "He got me pregnant before I even graduated high school, so I married him."

  "My father?"

  "Your father. I was eighteen. When we were in bed, he made the earth move. I thought I was in love with him."

  "What ever happened with him? You've never told me."

  Ellen stared into her teacup. "This is what I should have told you long ago." She took a deep breath. "I think I did love him, at least for a while. But sometimes pressure brings out the worst in people. The pressure of a wife and child, at his age--he wasn't even 21 yet when you were born--brought out his main weakness. Booze."

  Sophia paled. "Oh."

  "It gets worse. The worst part wasn't that Brian was turning into a drunk--it was that he was a violent drunk. I was eighteen years old, had a little baby, and it was becoming part of my routine to wait for my husband to come home so he could beat the shit out of me."

  "Oh my God."

  "And I know you were too young to remember this, but you weren't spared, either. He threw you around more than once." Sophia stared, wide-eyed. "I was finally--finally--getting the gumption up to try to get away from him, when he saved me the trouble by leaving."

  "Oh, God, Mom."

  "Now you know." Ellen stared into her teacup. "And now you know why I was such a nut when I found out you were drinking, and why I got hysterical when I found out that Scott was beating you. All I could think of was that you had inherited the worst from both your parents--the tendency to drink, and the tendency to allow yourself to get beat up. And I got hysterical. I didn't know what to do."

  "I understand why you found it difficult to tell me all this. I wish you had, though. It might have helped me figure out why my self-esteem was plummeting into my shoes. That was the whole problem, you know. It started as a chip, and turned into a chasm. And I kept chasing these guys that made me at least feel wanted, in some small way, because I felt so unwanted."

  "Oh, Jesus, Sophia. And there I was calling you every name in the book, instead of trying to explain myself to you."

  "Mom, I wasn't exactly receptive. Let's face it, it was a vicious circle."

  "It was hard, for both of us, I think. Hey, I never said I was a perfect mother. I could have been better than I was, though. I never really knew how not having a father affected you, and since I hated your father at that point, I didn't handle it well at all."

  "Actually, I think your divorce from Charlie affected me more than losing Dad, because I was too young when that happened. I knew Charlie wasn't my father, but I liked him--still do. But, since he's not my father, I never see him. He gets Tara and Eric, because they are his kids, and I understand that. But he always seemed to be a stabilizing influence. I guess I don't understand that one, because it always seemed that Charlie treated you well."

  "He did. Unfortunately, there were a lot of other women he was treating just as well."

  "Oh."

  "I forgave the first one. I even forgave the second one, against my better judgement. The third one was the last straw."

  "Oh,
Mom, I'm sorry. I had no idea."

  "How could you? You were ten years old."

  "I wish I had known. I wouldn't have held it against you, like I did. I thought he left because you were a shrew."

  Ellen had to laugh at that one. "Yeah I figured that's what you thought. And that was just another chip in your self esteem, wasn't it?"

  "I guess it was."

  Ellen took a sip of tea, and thought. "Sophia, how can I help? How can I help you see how wonderful you could be?"

  Sophia smiled, "Just keep telling me. I'm more receptive to stuff like that, now." They both laughed. "I'd like to talk like this more, too."

  "Anytime."

  "And if you really want to bolster my self esteem, just be very, very nice to Warren."

  Ellen cracked up laughing. "Now, honey, it's called self esteem, not Warren esteem. It's got to come from within. You can't get it from someone else."

  "I know. He doesn't give it to me. He just makes it easier to find it within myself."

  "Listen, I have noticed a growing self-confidence in you, ever since the whole Scott thing. I take it you've been going out with Warren since then?"

  "About a week after."

  "Right. So I've noticed the difference in you. I guess I'm just hoping and praying that it's not superficial. I hope it's not just Warren, you know what I mean?"

  "Yeah. It's within me. It really is. But I don't think I would have found it within myself without help, does that make any sense? Warren isn't inventing anything that isn't there. He's just shining a light on what is there. That light is crucial, however."

  "How's Warren's self-esteem?"

  "If we're not talking about romantic entanglements, it's just where it should be. Romance is another story." She smiled. "Although that might have taken a bit of a jump last night."

  "Unsure of himself?"

  "Very."

  "How did he get the gumption to take you to bed last night, then?"

  Sophia laughed. "He didn't. That was all me." She told her mother about the note and the baby-doll nightie.

  Ellen cracked up. "Oh, that was priceless. And that sounds like a Jessica Reidel idea."

  "Doesn't it, though?"

  "So, you built up his self-esteem last night."

  Sophia thought about it. "Yeah, but it wasn't me. It was him. His self-confidence was boosted by my reactions, but I was reacting to what he was doing. It was all him. Trust me, I wasn't faking a thing. I was just reacting. Believe me, I didn't almost shatter all the windows in my bedroom because I wanted to boost his self confidence, it was because he made me scream."

  "He made you scream?"

  "Oh, yeah. I'm surprised the neighbors didn't call." Sophia paused. "And then, at the end, he made me cry."

  "Wow."

  "If he got a self esteem boost from that, he earned it. And, you know what? I think I have, too. Because he's just reacting. I'm doing this. He's just there, being supportive, loving me, telling me that I'm all right."

  "I don't say this enough, Sophia, but you are more than all right."

  "Thanks, Mom." She thought about it. "You know, not only did I set last night in motion--I'm the one that asked him to go out with me. I don't think he would have ever done it."

  Ellen laughed. "I think you're right. You are doing all this. If you had the gumption to ask him out, and then take him to bed, I think you'll be just fine."

  "It's strength. If he's giving me anything, that's what it is. He's very strong. The whole Prep Boy Nerd façade obscures that, but he's the strongest person I know."

  Sophia took a sip from her tea. "Thanks, Mom."

  "For what?"

  "For listening. For being understanding. I know that finding out your little baby is a raging sex kitten must be a little difficult."

  Ellen laughed loudly. "I can think of worse things to be than a raging sex kitten. And I think I'm figuring out that you're a lot more than that, too. You're a pretty strong person yourself, you know."

  "I'm learning."

  "You're doing just fine." Ellen smiled. "Warren coming over tonight while I'm in work?"

  Sophia smiled, blushing. "Uh-huh."

  "Have fun."

  "I don't think I'm going to get used to this."

  "What? Your mother knowing that you're a raging sex kitten? You'll get over it." They both laughed.

  * * *

  Warren came over after supper. He was sitting next to Sophia on the couch, as Ellen was getting ready to leave for work. "You guys all set?"

  "Sure thing, Mom."

  "OK. I'm working until 2AM or so again, so the house is all yours. Try not to shatter any windows, and clean your own sheets this time, OK?" She walked out, as Sophia burst into laughter.

  Warren looked at Sophia. "What was that all about?"

  Sophia grinned at him. "She knows, Warren."

  "WHAT? How?"

  Sophia related the whole story, and her two conversations with her mother.

  "Wow," said Warren when they were done. "And she doesn't mind?"

  "No. Surprised me, I can tell you that. She really likes you, you know."

  "I know. I'm glad."

  "I must admit I feel a little funny, doing it when my mother knows I'm going to be doing it and all."

  Warren looked at her. "You want to take it easy tonight?"

  "Not on your fucking life." She got up off the sofa, and grabbed Warren's hand. "Come on, Romeo. Let's go make some walls shake."

  Laughing, they headed up the stairs.

  Chapter 13 - Braving The Elements

  "Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear Sophie, happy birthday to yoooooou!"

  Sophia blew out the candles on her cake. Her mother had had a small gathering in the house, prior to Jessie's big bash. Her brother and sister were there, of course, plus her stepfather. And Warren.

  As they all devoured the cake, Sophia opened her presents. Her mother got her some nice clothes and her stepfather a gift certificate to the local CD store. Then Warren handed her a package.

  " It's kind of humorous, but you'll love it. And this one there is no way I'd have you open at the party!"

  Sophia tore open the paper. It was a very large, leather-bound book, very nice. She read: "The collected works of William Shakespeare. Oh, Warren, this is great! What a wonderful present. Thank you so much!"

  Warren chuckled. "Hey, if I'm going to turn you into a Shakespeare addict, least I can do is finance it, right?"

  "You got that right. Warren, this is the perfect present. Especially from you."

  "No, that was the second most perfect present." He handed her a small box.

  "Another?" She opened the package. It was a jewelry box, which she opened. And gasped.

  Inside, was a gold pendant. On the pendant, hung a small gold heart. All around the outside of the heart were a series of small, perfect diamonds. Inscribed on the heart, in very small letters, it said "Love, Warren." It was gorgeous.

  "Oh, Warren, this is beautiful."

  "No more beautiful than you."

  "I think I'm going to cry."

  "'sokay. It's real gold, it won't rust."

  Sophia laughed and cried at the same time. "You goof! Put it on me?"

  "Gladly". Warren undid the clasp and placed it around her neck from the behind, and redid the clasp. "It looks perfect on you."

  Tara, her sister, had to come check it out, as did her mother. "Sophia, this is beautiful. Nice job, Warren."

  "Thanks, Mrs. Kovach."

  * * *

  They walked out of the house, and headed to Jessie's house for the party.

  "So, you're fifteen now. I'm officially dating an older woman," Warren teased.

  "And don't you forget it."

  "Sweet Fifteen and never been... no, you've been kissed. And never been... no, you've been that, too."

  "Warren!"

  "Sweet Fifteen and never been... Soph, is there anything you haven't done?"

  Sophia's eyes twinkle
d. "Anal."

  "Really."

  "Yeah." She looked at him. "Hmmmmmm. I've always been curious, though."

  Warren laughed. "That, ruler of my heart, is a project for another evening. Now we have to go face the jackals."

  "Hmmmm. I'd rather go back home and have sex."

  "Sophie!"

  "OK. Some other time." She stopped. "What did you just call me?"

  "When?"

  "A minute ago, when you said it was a project for another evening."

  "Hmmm. Oh. Ruler of my heart, of course."

  "I like that."

  "Soph, you are. You are the ruler of my heart. You've got it hanging around your neck, don't you?"

  "Dammit, you're going to make me cry again."

  "You'll ruin your makeup."

  "You goof! Well, this is Jessie's house. Ready?"

  "As I'll ever be, I suppose."

  They walked in the back door, into the kitchen.

  "Well if it isn't the birthday girl and her escort, Studley!"

  Sophia laughed. "Hi, Jess."

  "Hi, Jess", Warren chimed in. "Where can I put this?" He held out a bag.

  "What's in it?"

  "My world famous chip dip."

  Jessie laughed. "Warren, you're such a nerd." She paused. "Is it good dip?"

  Sophia interjected, "I can answer that. It's fabulous. Be nice to him, I told him to make a batch."

  Jessie laughed, "Alrighty then. Put it on the table around the corner, there, Prep Boy." She looked at Sophia. "What's this?" She reached out and lifted the necklace. "Nice. B-day gift from Studley, there?" Sophia nodded. "How sickeningly sweet of him. "

  Sophia laughed. "We the first ones here?"

  "Pretty much. Oh, I have bad news. I think Alexandra is coming. I tried to make sure she didn't hear about it, but I think she did. Oh, and John and Annie will definitely be here."

  "Oh that ought to be fun."

  "What ought to be fun?" asked Warren as he re-entered the kitchen.