Love Me Again (Pinecone Valley Book 1)

by Cindy Stark

  Her mother wrinkled her brow. “I’m sorry, honey. I didn’t mean for you to find out. I just don’t feel like that mop cleans as well as this way. If you want it back, you can take it. Or I can give it to one of your sisters.” Her gaze pleaded for forgiveness.

  Krystal gave a defeated snort. “I already have one. I bought it to help you.”

  Her mom waved her away. “That’s very sweet, princess, but I’m doing just fine.”

  Krystal cringed at the use of her family’s pet name for her, but refused to allow her annoyance to derail their current topic. “Until you end up in the hospital again.”

  “Don’t go getting all melodramatic on me now. My doctor is monitoring me, and I clear everything with him.” She laughed. “Besides, I’d rather die with my body worn out and used up than never having lived.”

  Krystal shook her head, feeling them at the head of a road they’d traveled down so many times she couldn’t keep track any longer. Still, she couldn’t hold her tongue. “Scrubbing floors is not living, Mom.”

  Her mother raised sassy brows. “Taking care of my house and my family makes me very happy. So, don’t you be saying I’m not living. I’m doing exactly what I want.”

  “But Mom, there’s so much more out there. More than the walls of this house. More faces than those of your kids and husband. You say you’re happy, but you haven’t considered the possibilities.” Krystal would never understand why her mother never yearned for more.

  “What would you have had me do any differently? You seem to think I spend too much of my time giving to you kids and your dad. Should I have had less children? Which one of you could I do without?” Her feisty look dared Krystal to answer.

  Yes, she needed to back off, but she couldn’t resist the opportunity to respond. “How about Kaitlin?” They all loved her little sister, but she was definitely the troublemaker out of the bunch.

  Her mom snorted, and the tension eased. “I should have seen that one coming. You know what? We should have tea. I ordered a new tropical green tea that showed up yesterday, and I have a fresh loaf of cinnamon bread that’s cooled enough to eat.”

  Krystal groaned and stood back to let her mother leave the bathroom. “Fine. I can take a hint. I know the discussion is over when you start using baked goods as a warfare tactic.”

  She smiled. “That’s right. You’re playing on my battlegrounds, and I’ll use everything I have at my disposal to make my daughter smile. You might be Miss Smartypants with the nursing degree, but I have the secret recipe for the illusive, addictive cinnamon bread.” She drew a finger across Krystal’s chin as she passed her and headed for the stairs.

  Krystal followed behind. “You’ve already given me your recipe, Mom.”

  She laughed as she descended and made her way into the kitchen. “Well, there is that. Still, I have a fresh loaf, and you don’t.”

  She didn’t understand her mother, but she’d never been able to stay mad at her, either. Despite what Krystal considered her miserable life, her mom maintained a positive outlook that could rival the energy of the sun. It kept their whole family going in a way Krystal could never imitate.

  When they’d settled at the old, cherry wood table that still looked gorgeous because of her mother’s loving care and Krystal had a mouthful of bread, her mom narrowed her penetrating gaze. “What’s bothering my sweet girl?”

  She finished chewing her bite, using the opportunity to form her thoughts. She hated that her mom had some weird ability to read her mind, yet that was the reason she’d stopped by. Well, that, and to say hello.

  “Is the job going okay?” her mom asked when she didn’t answer immediately.

  Krystal swallowed and smiled. “I love it.” She really did. If it wasn’t for the one thorn in her side named Josh, she couldn’t imagine anything better. Except if she became head nurse at a prestigious hospital many years down the road.

  Her mom reached out and patted her hand. “I’m truly so proud of what you’ve accomplished. You’ve worked hard for this, given up everything to make your dreams come true. Not many have that kind of ambition.”

  A shadow crossed the happiness she should have felt. She had given up everything. Not that she regretted it…much. She just didn’t expect to have to face those regrets on a daily basis. “It’s Josh.”

  A knowing smile lit on her mother’s face. “I wondered as much.”

  “You knew he was an EMT. Knew I’d run into him, didn’t you? How could you not say something?” Betrayal pricked her.

  Her mom shook her head. “It wouldn’t have mattered. I learned a long time ago that you’re going to do what you want regardless of what I say.”

  “Ugh. That doesn’t mean I don’t want to know,” she said and clenched her jaw.

  “Would it have changed your decision to work there?” Her mom lifted a brow, annoying her further.

  Would it have? She’d avoided Josh for years, but she now had her degree under her belt and stood on more solid ground than she had when she’d run from his arms.

  She sighed and leaned forward with her elbows on the table. “I don’t know. Probably not. I accepted the position because I thought it would be easier to focus on learning the job if I wasn’t trying to make a new home, too. Plus, I could get a head start paying off my student loans. At some point, I want to move to a bigger city with more opportunities, but this seemed like a good start.” She wouldn’t mention she’d grown more and more worried about her mother’s health.

  Her mom shook her head. “You know I don’t want you to move away. At least if you hang around for a while, it gives me the opportunity to convince you to stay.”

  “Mom…” They’d traveled this same vein of conversation far too many times as well.

  “I know. I know. I’m not about to hold you back. But when you settle down, I’d really like to have my grandbabies near.”

  “Who says I’m having kids?” She laughed, but part of her wondered. Maybe the career bug would refuse to take the backseat forever. She loved kids, always figured she’d have her own family, but she’d never be as good of a mom as her mother. What if she was worse?

  Her mom only smiled, and Krystal knew it was her way of refusing to argue.

  Krystal sipped her tea and then sighed. “He has a girlfriend.”

  Her mom’s gaze jumped to hers, seeming concerned as well. “Josh does? Who?”

  “Andy Pederson’s little sister. Paige, I believe.”

  “Oh, yes. Paige Pederson. Pretty blonde, works part-time at the library.”

  Krystal shrugged. “I guess.”

  She stared over her cup, studying Krystal in a way that made her uncomfortable. “He’s found someone new and that stings more than you wish it did.”

  Her mom could be so blunt at times, but she usually hit the mark dead on. Krystal laughed so she wouldn’t cry. “You should have been a fortune teller or something.”

  “Aw, honey. It doesn’t take a fortuneteller to see you’re in pain. It’s written all over you.”

  Krystal covered her face with both hands before drawing her fingers down her cheeks as though that would help her erase her feelings for Josh. “I just want to stop thinking about him. When will that ever go away?”

  “When you finally get over him.”

  She lifted her gaze and gave her mother a stoic look. “I’m over him. I’ve been over him for a long time.”

  Her mom smiled, a wise look glinting in her eyes. “You keep telling yourself that, honey. Maybe one day it will work.”

  * * *

  A spring storm brought dark clouds that stole the sun, leaving Josh’s small office at the sheriff’s department in shadow. With snow predicted to fall, he and Cam were guaranteed an interesting evening on the icy roads. If they were lucky, the local residents would keep their wits about them and drive safe. Better yet, they’d follow the storm warnings and stay home.

  He stood and reached across the desk to flip on the light before settling back in to finish a re
port on his computer. He had fifteen minutes before he and Cam would hit the pavement. As much as he loved his job, a night of cold, icy roads, stranded vehicles, and no one waiting at home to warm him when he returned took its toll.

  He looked up at the sound of footsteps coming down the hall and was surprised to find Paige instead of Cam peek into his office.

  “Hey,” she said with a bright smile as she entered and dropped into the seat across from him. “How goes it with my brother?”

  “I’m working on it.” Guilt nudged him because he hadn’t found the opportunity to approach Andy yet.

  “Good because I’ve made efforts on your behalf as well.”

  He straightened in his chair. “Really? What have you managed?”

  She grinned. “I stopped by the medical center yesterday on the pretense of meeting you there. Acted like I was lost and asked her for help.”

  He snorted. “What did you say to her?”

  “That you were my boyfriend and that we were supposed to meet there. She suggested I give you a call, so I did. You and I had a bit of a flirtatious interaction that I made sure she overheard.” She laughed. “You should have seen her face when I talked about that thing you do to me.”

  He swallowed, not particularly comfortable with her report. “What did Krystal do?”

  Paige shrugged. “She wasn’t super happy, I can tell you that. Her face dropped like a cannon ball out of an airplane.” Paige’s own expression sobered as though she wasn’t completely thrilled with her accomplishment, either.

  But that was the point, he reminded himself. To make Krystal unhappy enough to want to leave. Their town, especially the world encompassed by the medical center and his job were far too small for both of them to remain. She was the one who’d always wanted to leave, so she needed to do exactly that.

  He leaned forward, placing his forearms on the desk. “Then what happened?”

  “Uh…her co-worker joined her at the counter, and Krystal took off. Not sure where she went.”

  Josh ran his thumb across the stubble on his jaw, processing the information. “This is good.” He met Paige’s gaze. “Better than good. It’s great. Thank you.”

  “You’re welcome. Now it’s your turn.” She looked hopeful.

  “Gotcha. I’ll go talk to Andy right now.”

  She smiled. “Thank you. I know he loves me and worries about me, but I need to get him to see me as an adult instead of his kid sister.”

  “I’ll do my best. We’ve been friends for a long time, so I might be able to get him to hear me.”

  “Okay. I’ll call when I have more news. You do the same. Right now, I’m going to head home before the storm hits.” Paige stood. She gave him a small wave and headed into the hall, opposite of the main area of the sheriff’s department and fire station.

  Josh stood as well, exhaling a deep breath. He didn’t enjoy making her life more difficult, but he couldn’t live like this, either.

  He found Daddy Andy in the break room stuffing a sandwich in his mouth. The guys had given their chief the nickname because he tended to be the serious one who kept their antics from getting too far out of control.

  Pinecone couldn’t afford to keep too many full-time firemen on duty, most were volunteers, but Andy usually joined the guys who were staffed twenty-four on, twenty-four off like him and Cam.

  “Hey,” Josh said, walking into the room that had been made more cozy thanks to their station mom and administrative assistant, Doris. Their department consisted of all men, and although they kept the place clean, it would have lacked the warmth of a woman’s touch without Doris. “Have you seen Cam?”

  “He’s in talking to Curtis.”

  Josh nodded, not sure how to approach the subject. “I just saw Paige. She stopped in to say hi.”

  Andy turned to Josh with a narrowed gaze. “To you?”

  He lifted a shoulder and let it drop. “I guess she’s just being friendly.”

  “Friendly? What kind of friendly?”

  Funny how easy it was to push his buttons. Josh joined him at the table, giving off a relaxed vibe. Paige hadn’t been kidding. “I’ve known her since she was a kid, Andy. We’re friends. Nothing more.” Good thing he’d decided against telling Andy about the ruse he’d created with Paige. He was certain now it wouldn’t have gone over well.

  Andy huffed a breath and shook his head. “I don’t know what I’m going to do with her.”

  “She’s an adult, in case you haven’t noticed. There’s nothing you can do.”

  His friend sent him a glare. “She’s been hanging around some no-good trash, and I don’t care if she is an adult, I’m not going to stand back and let her ruin her life.”

  Josh shifted in his chair. “Let me ask you this. Has she ever gotten into trouble?” He waited for Andy to shake his head before he continued. “She’s almost done with college, and she’s done well with that, too.”

  Andy stiffened. “What’s your point?”

  “Maybe you need to trust the girl. Have you looked at her lately?”

  “You’d better not be looking at her,” he threatened.

  “Damn, Andy. Listen to yourself. You’re treating her like she’s a delinquent kid. She’s a smart, savvy lady in charge of her life. Maybe you need to recognize that before you push her into doing something she’ll regret.”

  Andy studied him with a calculated expression. “Why the hell are we talking about my sister?”

  Josh leaned back. “I don’t know. I just mentioned she said hi. You’re the one who went all ballistic.” Andy was a highly intelligent man, and he hoped he didn’t see through his and Paige’s subterfuge.

  He cursed under his breath and crumpled the paper that had held his sandwich. “Then we’d better find something else to discuss because we’re done talking about my sister.”

  Josh shrugged like he didn’t care. “Whatever. Cam and I are headed toward the north end of the county to be on-hand for any accidents in that area.”

  “Good.” Andy nodded his approval. “We’ll handle any that come up south. Let’s pray it’s a quiet night.”

  “Amen,” Josh said and left the kitchen in search of his partner. He hadn’t gotten far with Andy, but it was a start. He’d planted the seed that his friend needed to take another look at his little sister and start giving her the benefit of the doubt.

  CHAPTER FIVE

  An hour after sunset, the winds picked up their pace, screaming through the canyon before hitting their small town. Josh gripped the wheel, constantly correcting the steering to keep the ambulance between the lines on the road. Their sirens blared, the flashing of their lights reaching out into the darkness surrounding them as they headed for a sixty-five-year-old man with chest pains.

  “It’s going to be a bitch out tonight when that snow starts falling.” Cam sipped at his travel mug of coffee.

  “Yeah.” Josh cruised past a white sedan that had pulled to the side of the road to let them pass. “I’m glad this call came in early.”

  “Me, too.” He slowed as he reached the intersection that would take him off the main highway toward the MacDougal ranch. At the end of a long gravel road, they stopped in front of the house just as Mrs. Carol MacDougal came running outside.

  The wind whipped at her clothes and her short gray hair as she waved them toward her. “Hurry, hurry,” she called as they exited the vehicle, her voice getting lost in the vicious air and the beginning of swirling snowflakes.

  Josh opened the back and grabbed their gear before they both rushed toward the house. Mrs. MacDougal held tight to the screen door to keep it from blowing again. “Harold’s in the TV room.” She pointed as she pulled the door shut behind her.

  They followed her direction and found a balding older man half-sitting, half-slumping on the couch. His skin appeared pale and clammy.

  “Hi there, Mr. MacDougal. I’m Josh Vansant. Remember me?” He noted his patient’s increased respiratory distress as he wrapped a blood pressure cuff
around the man’s arm. “I baled hay for you one summer back in high school.”

  “Yes, I remember.” He ended on a gasp as he tightened the fist he’d laid on his chest.

  “Are you experiencing pain right now?” Cam asked as he took a quick peek under the man’s shirt.

  Mr. MacDougal nodded. “Pain. Pressure.”

  “Is it a heart attack?” Carol asked as she hovered over them.

  “We don’t have the proper tools here to make that diagnosis, but we’d like to transport him to be checked,” Josh answered. “Do you have any allergies, Mr. MacDougal?”

  He grunted and shook his head.

  “Taken any medications today?”

  His wife answered no for him.

  “Can I get a small glass of water, ma’am?” Cam ripped open an aspirin packet. “I’m giving you two aspirin, sir. If you’re having a heart attack, they’ll help.”

  His wife returned in a flash, and Josh propped him up to help him take the pills. He swallowed and then coughed.

  “We’ll need to transport him, Carol.” Josh stood, towering over the older lady.

  “Yes, of course.” She fluttered her hands. “What do I need to bring?”

  “Nothing right now, ma’am.” Cam answered. “Do you have family you can call that can meet you there?”

  “My—my daughter. She’s close to the hospital.” She opened a nearby closet and pulled two coats from inside.

  “I’ll get the gurney,” Josh said to Cam before he hurried back into the now raging storm. Frozen droplets stung his skin as he opened the exterior doors and jerked the metal frame from the back of the ambulance. He extended the legs and rushed toward the house.

  With minimal effort, they loaded Mr. MacDougal into the ambulance along with his wife. Cam rode with them, taking charge of the patient.

  The condition of the roads had degraded considerably during the short time they’d been at the MacDougal’s. The ambulance fishtailed as he pulled out onto the main highway, and he scrambled to correct his steering as he eased off the gas.

  “Shit,” he hissed under his breath. With the way things were headed, it promised to be a miserable, cold night.