Mr. January

by Ann Roth

  “Where did you take him, you bastard?” Adam muttered through clenched teeth.

  Rafe placed his hand on his shoulder. “Easy there, buddy. We don’t know that Jeff has him.”

  True, but tell that to Sam. Pale and frantic, wearing a trench through the house with her pacing. Adam vowed to do everything he could to bring her son back safely.

  “Between us and the police, we’ll find him,” Rafe said.

  Adam held on to that.

  The afternoon wore on, and the sun inched toward the horizon. Exiting a small grove of trees some distance from Sam’s house, he shaded his eyes and slowly panned the area. A shaft of rosy light shone on the roof of Betty Randall’s barn.

  The barn.

  Wouldn’t that be ironic, with Betty over at Sam’s? Adam squinted at the barn door. He thought the latch hung open, but from this distance he couldn’t be sure.

  He moved closer for a better look. Yep, unlatched. He had a strong hunch Betty hadn’t left it that way. He strode forward.

  “Where are you headed, man?” Rafe asked, racing to catch up.

  “To Betty’s barn, where she keeps the horses.”

  The hinges creaked when Adam widened the door, and the animals nickered softly. He spotted William right away, fast asleep on the hay bale.

  Exhaling a huge breath, Adam scooped the little guy up and held on tight.

  “Adam.” William yawned as he slowly came awake. “I falled asleep.”

  “You did, and your mom is worried sick. A lot of people are. We had no idea where you were.” He didn’t want to let go of the boy, but he needed to call Sam.

  On the same wavelength, Rafe dug his own cell phone out of his pocket. “You contact Sam, I’ll take care of the others.”

  She picked up on the first ring. “Adam?”

  “There’s someone here who wants to talk to you. Hold on, while I put this thing on speaker mode.” That done, he nodded to William to go ahead.

  The boy yawned again. “Hi, Mom.”

  “William!” Sam choked out a relieved sob. “Oh, sweetie, I’m so glad to hear your voice.”

  Adam’s eyes filled. He squeezed the bridge of his nose. That stopped the urge to cry, but not the feelings crowding his chest—his heart—with love.

  Love.

  He loved Sam. He also loved William.

  Whoa. He sank heavily on the hay bale.

  Sam was still talking to her son. “Where have you been?”

  “In the barn with Cocoa and Gordy. I couldn’t find Mrs. Randall so I unlatched the door and came in by myself. I didn’t bring any carrots, but the horses were awful happy to see me. Then I climbed onto the hay bale and falled asleep.”

  “I knew you needed a nap.”

  Eager to reunite Sam with her son, Adam gestured at William. “Say good-bye to your mom, sport, and I’ll take you home.”

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  ‡

  Between Adam, Rafe, the other crewmates, two police officers, Betty, and the knitting group, Sam’s living room was packed. Yet, as she rushed toward William, the group somehow parted to let her through.

  Tears flowed freely down her face as she hugged her son tight. “I am so mad at you,” she said, showering kisses on his face. “Don’t you ever go off by yourself again, without telling me first.”

  “Stop kissing me, Mom. I won’t.”

  Still holding him and sniffling, her eyes wet and bright, she looked at Adam. “Thank you.”

  A big lump had formed in his throat. Unable to speak, he nodded.

  The cell phone of one of the officers rang. He listened then disconnected. “We located Jeff Jones at his home, ma’am. He had nothing to do with this.”

  “I know that now,” Sam said. “Thank you for your help.”

  After satisfying themselves all was well, the officers left. Everyone else hung around, teasing William and being extra nice to Sam.

  “Knowing Jeff wasn’t involved makes up for a lot,” Sam said in a voice loud enough only for Jana’s and Adam’s ears. “So much that I’m finally ready to forgive him.”

  Adam couldn’t hide his surprise. “No kidding?”

  “This might sound weird, but suddenly all the bad”—glancing at William, she broke off—“the emotions I’ve carried around for three years are gone. I’ll email Jeff later and tell him.”

  No doubt her ex would be pleased.

  “How does it feel to let go of the negative stuff you held onto all this time?” Jana asked, wearing a curious expression.

  Sam looked pensive for a moment. Then she smiled. “Really good. Freeing.”

  William tugged on her sleeve. “Mom, I’m hungry.”

  “No wonder,” she said. “It’s past dinnertime. How about pizza for everyone?”

  Adam spoke before anyone else could. “Sure, but you and I need to talk. Now. Alone.” He clasped Sam’s hand.

  Betty, his buds, and the knitters nudged each other and gave him speculative looks. Ignoring them, Adam locked gazes with Sam. Her eyes softened as they always did, and his chest filled with sweetness.

  “Go on, you two,” Betty said. “I’ll step outside and call in the pizza order.”

  All but salivating over this interesting turn of events, she was no doubt eager to spread the news. Let her. Adam nodded, tugged Sam into her office, and shut the door.

  “While I searched for William….” His voice broke, and he had to stop and clear his throat. “If anything had happened to him….” He teared up.

  Sam started crying again. He grabbed onto her, and they held each other for a while. When he pulled himself together, he tipped up her chin in order to see her face.

  “That’s when I realized how much the little guy means to me.”

  “Oh, Adam, I—”

  He held up his hand, silencing her. “When you called to say he was missing, I was about to come over. I’ve thought a lot about you and me. I want to explore this amazing thing between us.”

  Again she opened her mouth to speak, and again he silenced her. “There’s more.”

  He had to clear his throat again. “Over the past few hours, I realized having you and William in my life is non-negotiable. I want you with me always. Because—now don’t fall over—I love you.”

  Her eyes shone. “I think you mean that.”

  “It took me a little while to admit it to myself. Are you willing to give this thick-headed guy a chance?”

  “Yes. Oh, yes.” She threw her arms around him.

  Laughing for pure joy, he hugged her hard. Then he kissed her.

  Sometime later, a knock sounded at the door. Betty poked her head in. Adam didn’t release Sam and didn’t miss the woman’s knowing look.

  “The pizza will be here soon,” she said. “Oh, and congratulations, you two.”

  “What did you do, stand at the door and listen?” Adam tried to frown, but he was too happy.

  “We all did.” With an unrepentant smile, the nosey woman widened the door, revealing the whole group, grinning and crowded around.

  Adam rolled his eyes. “Be sure to spread the word that Sam and I are together, Betty.”

  “I’ll get on that right after dinner.”

  “What about me, Adam?” William asked.

  Adam let go of Sam and ruffled the boy’s hair. “From now on, you, your mom, and I are going spend a lot of time together. If that’s okay with you.”

  “It is!”

  William jumped up and down and clapped, and laughter filled the air.

  *

  Samantha and Adam cleaned up the pizza mess and William headed upstairs to change into his pajamas. Suddenly Adam’s cell phone rang. By the way he straightened up tall, she guessed it was important.

  “Yes, sir,” he said. “I will.”

  When he disconnected, he looked so solemn. Fearing his father had taken a turn for the worse, she bit her lip. “Is everything okay?”

  “Better than okay.” A huge grin replaced his serious expression. “That
was Captain Comings. From now on, you can call me lieutenant. I got the promotion.”

  “Was there ever any doubt?” She threw her arms around the man she loved. “I’m so proud of you.”

  “I feel pretty damn good myself.” His eyes sparkled. “I can’t wait to tell Pop tomorrow. Come with me when I visit him. It’s time he met my woman.”

  His woman. Samantha liked the sound of that. She nodded. “Should we bring William along?”

  Adam scrubbed his hand over his face. “Richard isn’t the easiest man to be around. Let’s save that for later. This time, it’ll be just you and me.”

  “All right. When I do my baking in the morning, I’ll make an extra half-dozen muffins, just for him.”

  “He’ll like that.”

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  ‡

  “I’ve never been in a 4Runner before,” Samantha said as she and Adam drove toward his father’s house in the gray gloom after dropping William at kindergarten. “It’s nice and roomy.”

  “I like it. I like you better.”

  His smile melted her. After a tender and passionate night together, she felt loved and hopeful that maybe, just maybe, things would work out between them.

  The icing on the cake had been William, acting as if seeing Adam in their kitchen in the dark hours of early morning was as normal as the sunrise.

  “That’s a nice shade of yellow,” he added, nodding at the pullover under her open jacket. “Is it new?”

  “This is what I’ve been slaving over in knitting class. I wanted to wear something bright for you father.”

  Adam sobered. “About that. Don’t think that because I let him know you were coming with me, he’ll be warm and welcoming.”

  “I kinda got that the first ten times you told me.” Adam seemed pretty uptight. “It can’t be that bad. Are there any topics I should avoid?”

  “I’ll tell him about the promotion first. That’ll put him in a decent mood and make him easier to get along with. Especially if you flash your prettiest smile and stick with surface stuff—the weather, baking. We won’t stay long. I’ll get you home in time for your knitting class. What’s your next project?”

  “I haven’t decided yet. Listen, if things are going well with your dad and we decide to visit longer, I’ll text Jana to go on without me.”

  “Noted.” Adam pulled up to a modest cottage and braked to a stop. “We’re here. Remember, he’s hooked up to an oxygen tank. That can be unnerving when you first see him.”

  Samantha squeezed his tense hand. “Don’t worry. This is going to be great.”

  *

  Adam didn’t speak as he and Sam headed up the front walk to his pop’s door. Sam had it right—he was plenty stressed about this visit. He wanted the old man to make nice today, which was why he’d phoned last night and given him a heads-up about Sam.

  He hadn’t even hinted about the promotion, and couldn’t wait to see his father’s face.

  Nella had tacked her usual note on the door. No change from yesterday—his father had eaten, been shaved, and taken his meds. After knocking once, Adam opened the door and gestured Sam inside.

  As always, the tube was on, but for once, the sound had been muted.

  Adam grasped Sam’s hand and brought her closer to his father. “Pop, this is Sam.”

  The old man looked her up and down. “Adam said you were a looker. He was right.”

  “Um, thanks.” Sam blushed. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Healey.”

  “Call me Richard. Likewise.” He eyed the bakery bag. “Is that for me?”

  “As a matter of fact, yes.” She handed him the bag.

  Licking his lips, he rifled through the contents before choosing the one he wanted. After devouring it, he nodded at Adam. “You lucked out with this one, son.”

  With his father behaving himself, Adam breathed easier. “Don’t I know it.”

  “There must be plenty of men after you,” Richard commented. “Why in the world did you pick this guy?”

  There was no humor in his voice, and Sam looked taken aback. “Off the top of my head, he’s smart, handsome and kind. I also happen to love him.”

  His father snorted. Her eyes widened in surprise.

  Time to share the good news and turn things around. “Hey, Pop. I made the cut,” Adam said. “You’re looking at Guff’s Lake Fire Department’s new lieutenant.”

  Fully anticipating his father’s pride and respect, he squared his shoulders.

  But he didn’t see a flicker of respect in Richard’s eyes. No thumbs up or pleased smile, either, just a disbelieving shake his grizzled head. “You must have snowed those fools the same as you did Sam.”

  A punch to the chest would have hurt less. Refusing to flinch or react at all, Adam kept his expression carefully blank.

  Sam gasped. “Surely, you don’t mean that. Adam worked hard for this promotion. He’s qualified, and he deserves it.”

  When the old man remained silent and unmoved, she narrowed her eyes. “He also happens to be one of the finest men I’ve ever known.”

  “You’re entitled to your opinion.” Without another word, he unmuted the TV and amped up the volume.

  She started to say something else, but Adam stopped her. “Don’t waste your breath. Let’s get out of here.”

  “You’re right about your father,” she said as soon as they stepped outside. “He’s a very difficult man, and I pity him. But you…you have the patience of a saint.”

  Adam scoffed. “As a kid, I tried the patience of a saint. That’s why Richard’s the way he is, because of how I used to be.”

  She looked at him as if he were crazy. “You don’t believe that.”

  “It’s true.”

  “Baloney. Like you, me, and everyone else, your father is responsible for his own behavior.”

  Adam didn’t buy that.

  “Don’t let him blame you for his actions and the choices he made and makes, and don’t let him ruin your happiness.”

  “I won’t,” Adam pledged. Once he moved past the terrible disappointment of still not measuring up.

  He was too shell-shocked on the drive home to make conversation. Sam must have sensed his need for silence because she let him be.

  “Why don’t you eat with William and me tonight?” she offered when he pulled up at her house.

  He needed to lick his wounds alone. “We could both use a decent night’s sleep, plus I should get some things done at my place,” he said. “I’m meeting the captain at The Rogue for dinner tomorrow night to discuss my new job duties, so that’s out, too. I’ll call you. Say hi to your knitting friends.”

  He leaned across the seat for a kiss. Her sweetness and warmth washed over him, soothing his bruised soul.

  “I love you,” she sighed when he broke away.

  “Love you, too.”

  *

  Over the next two days, Adam caught up on chores at home, met with the captain, and mentally prepped for his new firefighter duties. He checked in with Sam, always hiding his pain. He also did a lot of thinking.

  About his pop and their piss-poor relationship. As bad as Adam wanted to improve it, he couldn’t force his father to care. With sudden clarity, he realized that no matter what he accomplished, the old man would always find him lacking.

  That hurt.

  He mulled over Sam’s words, that he shouldn’t blame himself for Richard’s drinking and bitterness. That the responsibility for those choices lay with Richard, not Adam.

  It took a little while for that to sink in. When it finally did, his jaw dropped. For the first time since Marcus’s death, he was free from the burden of trying to please a man who chose to be miserable.

  It had only taken him sixteen years to see things for what they really were. “Stupid idiot,” he muttered, shaking his head.

  His own words pulled him up short. For years, he’d accepted the label and other degrading names his father had laid on him. No more. He wasn’t stupid, and for d
amn sure, no idiot. As Sam had pointed out, he was a good man.

  “I am a good man,” he stated. Twice.

  Saying it felt so great he laughed out loud.

  And counted his blessings. He was a lieutenant at the Guff’s Lake Fire Department, with a rosy future ahead. Sam loved him, and William probably did, too. Which made him the luckiest man alive.

  Much of the credit for his mental turnaround belonged to Sam. She deserved a special thank you, something she’d never forget.

  Knowing exactly what he wanted to do, Adam called her. “Could you ask Betty to watch William for a little while tomorrow morning?”

  “If she doesn’t go to church. What’s going on?”

  “Tell you when I pick you up.”

  *

  Before heading to Sam’s Sunday morning, Adam stopped by his pop’s with a muffin. Rain teemed down, and he paused in the threshold to wipe his feet and shake the raindrops off his coat. “Morning,” he said.

  Richard’s sneer signaled a nasty comment coming. “Sam’s a looker, but she must be blind and dumb to care about—”

  “That’s enough, Pop,” Adam interrupted. “I love her and she loves me, so get used to it. I also love you, and even if you aren’t proud of me for my promotion, I’m real proud of myself.”

  His father snorted and started to speak, but Adam cut him off again. “Here’s your muffin.” He dropped it on the TV table. “See ya.”

  Standing tall, he left. And headed for Sam’s.

  *

  Rain pummeled the 4Runner so Samantha could hardly see out the window. “Where are we going?”

  “Out for a drive.”

  “In this storm?”

  “It’s supposed to let up soon.”

  Adam seemed different from the last time they’d been together, but Samantha couldn’t pin down what had changed. “You seem…lighter somehow,” she commented.

  “Is that right.” Shrugging, he turned onto Kirkdale Road.

  Some five minutes later, the rain stopped and the clouds began to disperse.

  “You were right about the weather,” she said.

  At the sign for Guff’s Lake, Adam veered off Kirkdale Road and followed the route to the lake.

  Samantha frowned. “We’re going to Guff’s Lake?”