No Game No Life, Vol. 1

by Yuu Kamiya

  Disregarding Steph, shouting with her face red. Like scholars who had hit upon a major problem and were searching for a solution. The two folded their arms and pondered, and finally sparked with an apparent realization.

  “…In that case.”

  Shiro explicated the merciless solution.

  “…You can…push the envelope.”

  “Ohh, that’s it! That’s my sister, the genius girl!”

  “……Huh?”

  Sora was doting on his sister, and the sister seemed to be enjoying it. And—somehow. They seemed to have “found a way for things to go there” with the sister present. Steph tensed.

  “—But how far can we go, I wonder?”

  “…Brother, you’re the expert on that…”

  “That—if that’s a reference to manga and games, I should point out that things don’t work the same way in real life, my little imouto.”

  “You don’t…know what to do…because you’re a virgin?”

  As Sora showed his appreciation for her appropriate but unnecessary translation, Shiro waved her smartphone.

  “I’ll record it with my camera…and tell you what to do.”

  “Hm. Telling me what to do aside, why do you need to record it, my little sister?”

  “…Brother, you don’t want…pr0n?”

  “Hmm. I am puzzled by my sister’s unusual consideration, but I shall accept it with gratitude.”

  With complex feelings, Sora turned back to Steph. Steph, meanwhile, just stared, not knowing what the smartphone was. Shiro started recording video and gave her first direction.

  “Take one. Accident, and he falls down…like…?”

  “Oh—that scene. But…how am I supposed to fall down in this—”

  As Sora looked around for something to trip on, Shiro crept up.

  “…Hmp.”

  And kicked him lightly.

  “Whoa—I get it! (Monotone) Ooops, I’m faalliing.”

  “Eh?”

  With acting that wouldn’t even qualify as third-rate, Sora fell unnaturally onto Steph. When they landed, his hands were placed—

  —of course, right on her breasts. He could have ordered Steph to interpret the situation as a mere “cliché”—but that would have been abusive, obviously.

  “…Take two…Breast fondling due to an act of God…”

  “Uh…How is it an act of God if I’m…”

  “…Okay, never mind…”

  “No, let’s do it, Director. I’ll do my best!Sei-yah!”

  Squish, squish. Squoosh, squoosh. Squish, squish. Squoosh, squoosh. Foomp, foomp. Boink, boink, boink, boink. Foomp, foomp. Boink, boink, boink, boink. Jiggle, jiggle. Bounce, bounce. Bwwwwooooing.

  “Whoa…”

  Sora could only think of an interjection to describe the feeling that was just as rich as he expected. Meanwhile, Steph was dumbfounded, with her eyes open wide. For her understanding could not keep up with the situation—. Well, that was a factor. More important—the sensation of his hands on her gave her a feeling that somehow melted her thoughts.

  “—O…h!”

  A moan escaped Steph’s lips, but, fortunately, perhaps because she covered it, the two didn’t hear it.

  “—Hm-hmmgh… Th-three-D girls are actually not bad…Uh—excuse me, Director. Is this still going to be rated All Ages?”

  “Sure…but, Brother…you’re overdoing it.”

  Shiro knit her brows slightly, looking down at her own flat chest.

  “Oh—that’s true. The breast fondling is purely an accident, so it would be better to limit it to three panels or so—so, uh, what shall we do next, Director?”

  “…Take three. The ensuing breast slip.”

  “Wait, is that okay?”

  Sora objected without thinking, and Director Shiro answered seriously and decisively.

  “…By J*mp standards, even, full frontal nudity…is nothing.”

  “Wait, no, she can’t be naked! In real life, there are nipples, you know?”

  “…Well, that’s…added in the trade paperbacks…”

  “Director, this is real life. This is happening in real life. We can’t white them out or redraw them.”

  “…Then…underwear?”

  “Well, sure—but I’m not sure how her clothes could come off in this situation.”

  Sora and Shiro felt the pain of the disparity between the real world and fiction.

  “…Brother, what if…we were talking, about the bottom.”

  “Oh, I see, a flash from a skirt flip! You’re right, Director, that’s totally okay for all ages!”

  Then, as Sora reached to flip Steph’s skirt. In Steph’s melted brain, a spark lit.

  —Skirt…flip? Underwear—Are they talking about seeing my panties?

  —No, that’s not okay. My top is okay. Well, not really, but. Steph was warned not by her barely remaining reason, but by her instincts: The bottom is not okay. Not okay. Definitely not okay. At the very least, not okay right now. It was—how shall we put it.

  —It might have been a planted emotion. But, being pushed down and breast-fondled by the one she loved. The things that should happen, happen—as a matter of physiological dynamics!

  “—Eep—Aaaaaaah?!”

  This instinct thrust Steph’s melted brain forward. Quickly, she swept away the arm Sora was touching her with and pushed him away.

  “Whoa!”

  Since Sora had crouched to flip her skirt, one push from a woman was enough to throw him off balance. He stood up in a struggle not to fall over, but it only made things worse. The distance he was falling lengthened, and he was forced to take a few steps back.

  —Which brought him to the door. The single light push from Steph carried him until—. Gonk. A dull noise.

  “Oww!”

  Sora raised his voice upon hitting his head.

  —But that wasn’t the end of it.

  —Ah, low-cost lodging. The impact flicked open the cheap door fitting, and Sora fell straight into the hall.

  “…Brother!”

  “—Huh—hey, what—!”

  And, so as to close off the voices of the two concerned about Sora. Creeeee…went the cheap metal—Wham. With the recoil of its opening, quietly—the door shut.

  ……

  For a moment, Steph was stunned, not understanding what had just happened. But then, realizing that her one push had thrust Sora to the hall of the inn.

  “—Hh! So-Sora?!”

  For the first time, she called the man’s name, and she hurriedly got up.

  —A sensation of tightness in her chest, and a powerful feeling of unease. She decided to assume it was just concern that she might have hurt someone with her actions. As for the possibility that it was worry that he might not like her anymore—that, she flatly refused to accept. While thus reassuring herself, she rushed to open the door and flew out into the hall.

  There, in the corner of the hall, Sora was clutching his head and shaking.

  “Wha!”

  She didn’t think she had pushed him hard enough that he’d fall all the way over there. But there he was, in the corner of the hall.

  “So-Sora?! A-are you okay?”

  Clutching his head. He did hit his head hard against the door, but it couldn’t be—Steph paled. But—

  “I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry forgive me forgive me please forgive me—”

  —It seemed it wasn’t because he’d hit his head. Sora was just crouching and apologizing over and over.

  “Pardon?”

  “I’m sorry I’m sorry I mean I thought if I missed this chance I’d never have a chance to touch a boob my whole life I mean I’m a guy and I do want a girlfriend and I do have dirty thoughts and no really I get it so please don’t look at me with those disdainful eyes yes I’m awful yes I’m a pervert yes I know I’m sorry I’m so sorry—”

  —After cheating her and sexually harassing her so much, standing unbowed. Now Sora was there, shaking like a newborn
lamb, apologizing.

  “…Wh-what’s this about?”

  Steph had no idea what was going on. She peeked back into the room, thinking she could ask his sister, Shiro, for an explanation.

  “………Brother…Brooother… Where arrre you… Don’t, leave me, a…looone…”

  —Shiro, on the bed, was just like her brother. Crouching with her knees in her arms, trembling visibly, dropping tears without expression.

  “Wh-what’s going on with these siblings?”

  By now, Steph had forgotten all about having had her breasts grabbed, and all she could do was stare.

  …

  Yes, this was “ ”: Sora and Shiro. The “two-in-one” player. It wasn’t just about having different skills. If they were separated too far—in other words. It was because one was so socially phobic she couldn’t even communicateand the other was so socially maladjusted that he was beyond hope.

  “…Brother…Brother, where arrre you…”

  “I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry…”

  Are things making sense now? A loser. A shut-in. The two siblings, separated by seven years, could only be in the same place at home—. This—explained everything.

  CHAPTER 2

  CHALLENGER

  In the Kingdom of Elkia, the capital, Elkia—specifically, Block 3 of the Western District. The siblings had checked out of the inn, where they had more or less blackmailed the master into letting them stay several nights, without staying a night. Now they greeted a new morn at Stephanie Dola’s house. Or to be more precise—at the bath.

  “…Brother, please, explain.”

  Shiro was naked, and her head was being washed.

  “Explain? If we’re pushing the envelope, we’ve gotta have a bath scene. What more explanation you need?

  “…Brother… Bath scenes are…censored… Elementary schoolkids…are totally off-limits.”

  “Worry not, my sister, Mr. Steam is on the job, so we’ll just be pushing the envelope.”

  So spoke Sora as he viewed the grand bath, unnaturally full of rising steam.

  “Could it be that this is the only reason you ordered me to boil the grand bath?”

  Steph washed Shiro’s hair, aghast.

  “What do you mean, the only reason? It’s important.”

  “Do you know how much firewood the staff wasted for that?”

  In addition, of course, it was impossible to get into a bath that was boiling. They had also wasted water to raise the steam…

  “If you want to go there, what about you, using this huge bath all by yourself?”

  “—Nggh…”

  This was perhaps what it meant to be part of the royal bloodline. Steph was even richer than Sora had imagined. Her mansion, built in a style vaguely reminiscent of Rome, was so big that the siblings, who had known only Japan, would have believed it if told it was a castle, and Steph’s private bath, which they were using now, seemed spacious enough for ten people to use. The bath, also reminiscent of Rome in its furnishings, was steamed to be appropriate for all ages. Was so magnificent that it was impossible to think that humans were in decline after losing hand over fist.

  “Ah, excuse me. My sister hates baths—and she always fusses, ‘You can’t show naked eleven-year-olds even if it’s R-18!’ and won’t let me wash her, so she doesn’t get bathed much. After she suggested pushing the envelope yesterday, I thought I’d have to take advantage of it.”

  “…Nggh… Brother, I hate you.”

  It was about pushing the envelope on Steph. That was Shiro’s subtext.

  “My sister, if you do things right, you’ll be a dazzling beauty, so do things right.”

  “…I don’t have to be…a beauty.”

  “Your brother likes the beautiful Shiro betterrr.”

  “…Ngghhh…”

  Shiro groaned as if that did something, but didn’t end the discord.

  —That didn’t really matter. Well, it was a little annoying how close they were, but ignoring that, there was a more important question that couldn’t be ignored.

  This situation. What was going on. Why was she washing a naked Shiro’s hair, while a clothed Sora was behind her with his back turned?

  “—Sora…why do I have to be naked and washing Shiro’s hair?”

  —No, don’t all chime in. Why, then, had she not refused? She was well aware of her responsibility in this matter.

  “Weren’t you listening to me? Because this is the only way Shiro will take a bath.”

  “Wha—so, you don’t care about me?!”

  “Hm? You want me to look?”

  “Of—of course not! I’m asking you if this is harassment!”

  “Don’t worry, Steph. I intend to view your naked body carefully by other means.”

  “—Wha—”

  As soon as she heard this, she flushed red and hid her body. At the same time, at hearing Sora suggesting that he did have some interest in her, she felt relief. Steph looked around for a wall to bash her head against, but then Sora spoke pathetically.

  “However, for now you must forgive me—I cannot rely too fully on Mr. Steam.”

  “……Excuse me?”

  “For instance, if I should join you in the bath only for my indolent member to suddenly regain motivation, or if Mr. Steam should fail to perform as hoped in preventing me from viewing my young sister directly, it won’t be R-18; it will be banned.”

  “—Uh, I see.”

  She didn’t really, but Sora seemed to be saying that he didn’t need to look right now.

  The limits of Steph’s comprehension here perhaps could not be helped. Set up in the bath were two phones and a tablet. Steph had no way of knowing the meaning of those little cameras.

  —Later he would have Director Shiro check the footage and show it to him if it seemed acceptable. Sora swore this in his heart and repressed his urge to turn around.

  “Hff… That hits the spot…”

  “Mngh… My hair’s all papery… It’s itchy…”

  Sora had waited for Shiro to get out of the bath and then taken a quick shower. Sora seemed refreshed at having finally gotten a chance to wash himself, while Shiro answered him crossly.

  —Sora had been right, after all, about how Shiro looked when her hair was washed and nicely combed. Her hair made a gentle wave, looking soft to the touch and white as snow, and further brought out her skin as white as porcelain—along with her round face, balanced features, and red eyes, she was like a doll made by a master of the craft.

  “If only you could be like that all the time; it’s such a waste.”

  “…It’s not like anyone but you…is gonna see.”

  Sora, too, had just finally shaved and despite his teasing was also looking sharper. How to put it? I—I blew it, thought Steph when she looked directly at him; she could hardly stop herself from getting a nosebleed, it was so… His initial scrubbiness had been alleviated, and now he had the clean freshness of a “fine young man.”

  But—that wasn’t the problem. Steph was desperately struggling to stop blood from dripping from her nose.

  “Y-y-you two—put on some clothes!”

  —She shouted at the towel-clad, half-naked siblings as they looked blankly.

  “…You’re the one who told us to send them for cleaning. Those are all we’ve got; are they dry already?” Sora asked, doubting that this world had dryers.

  To which Steph replied, “Th-th-th-that’s… Fine, then, I’ll get you something else—I-I wonder if I had any gentlemen’s clothes… Ng, nghh… Why do I have to be…”

  Steph turned, muttering to herself, to look for clothes.

  And ten minutes later. In the same location as before, Steph had fallen to her knees and hung her head, experiencing massive regret.

  I—I blew it……!

  “O-ho, so this is a butler’s outfit—what you call a tailcoat… It’s a bit formal, but it’s like cosplay, so it’s fun! Shiro, you look good in that, too.”

 
; “…Too many frills. Hard to move…”

  Shiro was clad in a dress Steph had worn as a child.

  It was all very well that Steph had gone out to look for clothes to fit the half-naked pair. But she had no men’s clothes, so she had to use the staff’s—in other words, a butler’s outfit. Likewise, the only clothes she could find to fit an eleven-year-old girl were hers from her childhood. Now the siblings looked like a well-bred young lady and her faithful butler—

  Glance. Steph looked once more. Sora’s wide shoulders and thin body somehow fit all too well as a butler, sending Steph’s heart racing. While, with the way his sister looked in charge of him, Steph’s heart squeezed: for the third time.

  “I blew it…”

  “Huh? Blew what?”

  “Never mind!”

  Panicking at the sincerity that had slipped out of her mouth, Steph shook her head as she swept up her knees from the floor and got up. Sora, who, if he were attuned to such maidenly subtleties, wouldn’t have been a virgin for eighteen years, murmured, “Well, then.”

  “Now that we’ve got our sleep and freshened up in the bath—Steph.”

  “Uh, um, yes? Wha-what is it?”

  “What are you so flustered about? Does this house…mansion—castle…?”

  Born and raised in Tokyo, Japan, Sora couldn’t seem to find a category to fit Steph’s dwelling, so he came to the conclusion, well, whatever.

  “Does this place have a library or study or something, someplace we can do research?”

  “Uh, yes…it does…but why?”

  “Are you hard of hearing, Stephy-poo? Of course, for research?”

  “I-I heard that! I’m asking what you want to research!”

  “What… This world, of course.”

  “‘This world’…?”

  As Steph stood bewildered at his suggestion that there was another world.

  “Brother, we haven’t…told her.”

  As if still dissatisfied with her dried-out hair, Shiro spoke sullenly.

  “—Hm? What? Is that so?”

  “Sorry, but…I’m not seeing what this is about.”

  “Oh, me. It’s so difficult to find the words to explain when this gets brought up so formally.”