The tears came and I tried to wipe them away, but more took their place. I was in no shape to face Edwin right now. I flipped open my mirror and glared at my reflection. With red cheeks and black rimmed eyes, I scowled into the mirror, then slapped it shut and slammed the visor up. When I tossed down my tissue in the seat next to me, something out the window caught my eye. I froze in place when I spotted a black figure standing outside my passenger door.
Immobilized with fear, my eyes darted to the side. I watched the large man as he tried to peer through the tinted glass, with big hands cupped around his eyes like binoculars. I prayed that if I sat still enough the person might just leave. Then I questioned whether my doors were even locked. I was too scared to move, let alone hit the lock button. My breaths were short and raspy, as my mind ran through all the possible outcomes from this situation.
The man pressed his forehead to the window. "You gonna let me in or do I have to freeze out here some more?" the man yelped.
I turned my head and squinted through blurry eyes, then let out a foggy breath. “Eddie?” I hurriedly unlocked the door and he hopped in, the interior lights quickly fading out.
"I thought I saw you in here."
The car was dark, with only one street lamp nearby, but I couldn’t hide my condition from Edwin. He knew me better than that. A state of unease was thick in the air. Edwin squinted at me and rested his hand on my arm.
"Are you okay?"
He always knew when something was wrong and, if I wasn't careful, he'd have me spilling my guts in no time. Instead of digging myself into a deeper hole, I opted for keeping my mouth shut.
He didn't take the hint. "You weren't answering your phone at work and you didn't leave a note at home. I was afraid you were hurt." His cold hand cupped my warm, wet cheek. "Are you?"
I shook my head no, with my lips pressed together to hold in a sob.
He studied my face, scrutinizing my every breath, then tucked a stray hair behind my ear. "I saw your car spinning out and I only thought the worst. You were sitting so still."
"I'm fine; just a little shaken."
"Glad to hear it," he said, sarcastically. "Too bad now I'm a fucking mess."
My heart flooded with relief as Edwin laid it on thick, with the what ifs and don't you dares, all while keeping his hands to himself. Instead of answering his ridiculous accusations, l just attacked him with a great big, bear hug. He was only wearing a long sleeve shirt and a toque, so I expected him to be absolutely freezing, but instead his arms were warm and affectionate.
As Edwin began to rub my back, I became more and more aware of how awkward it was becoming. I instantly released him from the death lock and he wasted no time getting out of the car. I watched him round the hood in mere seconds and open my driver side door.
"Move over. I'm driving."
I didn't have the energy to fight with him, as he scooped me out of the chair and placed me in the passenger seat. He quickly spun my car around and pulled it into our driveway.
“Why are you so upset?” he asked, as if it weren’t eating away at him.
"I told you, Eddie. I’m fine.”
He cast an assessing gaze over my muddled appearance. "You don't look fine."
How was I supposed to convince him, when I was actually so far from fine right now? In fact I was about as far away from fine as it got.
We walked to the house and he unlocked the door, letting me enter first. He followed me to the closet where we hung our coats in silence. He was being so reserved that it made me very nervous.
"I have to tell you something," I stuttered, hoping to pass it off as a response from the cold.
"Let me guess. You haven't eaten yet," he answered.
My stomach growled on cue, loud enough for him to hear, but I wouldn't let him control me that easily. "It's not that. It’s important," I insisted, slamming my purse on the chair.
Edwin waved me off and walked away. "It can wait. I'm starving." He entered the kitchen and left me standing at the door.
I stomped after him and stopped abruptly, with my hands on my hips, keeping my distance. "I'm really not up for this right now, Eddie. Look at me. In case you haven’t noticed, I'm a natural disaster."
He raised a sexy, arched brow. "Who said you needed to get all done up? We’re not going anywhere. It's cuisine à la Edwin tonight, baby!"
That was enough to make me smile and, even though I tried so hard not to, my mouth puckered against my will.
"I'll take that as a yes.” He pulled open the pantry door, searching for something to throw together. "Hmm. What's on the menu for tonight?" His hand scrubbed his soft, stubbly chin; the same chin that had scrubbed all over mine a few short nights ago.
As I walked away, I could hear the clatter and clanging of pots and pans and started to wonder how long his little stunt would take. It was late and I hadn't yet told him the point of my visit. Edwin just seemed happy to see me back home.
I raced up the stairs and hurriedly pulled together my favourite outfits from my closet. While Edwin cooked, I packed, knowing that the longer I took the more worried and suspicious Cameron would become. I had to do my best to hold onto his trust while I still had it.
After dinner, Edwin stared at me for a long while with a half-smile on his face. "You're beautiful," he said at last, breaking the long silence.
How can this man make me feel guilty for moving in with a man that I love? "I'm a mess. You don't have to try and sugar coat it. I'm not blind and you certainly aren’t making this any easier on me."
He flashed a devilish smile. "I'll make it easy for you. Choose me."
"Hah!" And if I hadn't laughed, I surely would have cried. I had dreaded this day ever since the day I signed the deed to our house. My smile faded as I dropped my dishes into the sink.
I left the room and dove onto the couch, face down, wishing that I could bury myself from this existence. I heard Edwin's heavy footsteps approaching, then nothing. I peered over my folded arms to see where he had gone, only to realize that he was kneeling right next to me. I jolted back, startled by his closeness.
He rested his hand on my back and gently rubbed me. "I'm here for you when you're ready to talk."
I sighed and buried my face again. Why does he have to be so good to me? Knowing that pouting wasn’t going to fix anything, I clambered to my feet and sat back down. Edwin slid up beside me and carefully placed his hand on my thigh.
"Eddie," I warned, taking his hand off my leg and placing it on his own.
"Oh, come on," he replied, playfully pushing me back down onto the sofa.
Before I could pull myself back up, I found him over me, with a very serious look on his face. Then he leaned in and kissed me before I even realized what was happening. My eyes had never closed, but that didn’t stop him. It also didn’t stop the tingle in my lips that lasted long after his mouth had left them.
I pried myself from his vice grip and pushed him off of me. "What do you think you’re doing?”
He let me have the ounce of space I had placed between us. Then, the look I dreaded appeared on Edwin's face.
"This game of cat and mouse; it's not fair to Cam and it's not fair to you, Eddie. I'm so sorry..." I swallowed, but my voice still sounded hoarse. "… but I'm moving in with Cam."
A look of horror and disbelief formed instantly on his face, but Edwin quickly covered it up with anger. “No, you’re not.” He leapt to his feet and opened his mouth twice to say something, then just didn't. After burning me with a fiery glare he stomped angrily to the bottom of the staircase.
I knew the very moment when he found my packed bags, because he mumbled some obscenities then heatedly punched a hole through the drywall. Edwin stormed outside, into the blustery weather, without grabbing a jacket. His truck engine roared alive and he stepped on the gas, shooting out of the driveway sideways before speeding off.
I raced to my room to grab a few last minute things. The more I took now, the less of a chance I would find
myself in this kind of predicament again. I dropped my last bag into my trunk and slammed it shut, relieved to be on my way. It was getting late and I was sure Cam would be getting worried by now, so I drove straight there.
Not feeling quite at home yet, I knocked on Cam's door before letting myself in. Hands full, I nudged the door open and dropped a pile of things into the entryway. To my surprise, I heard little footsteps galloping toward me and then Pheobe appeared, hobbling at full speed for a hug.
I went down to one knee and opened my arms for her. "You're back!"
"Abby!" Pheobe cheered, wrapping her arms around my neck.
I pulled her back to check her over. "Look at you. You must have grown two inches since I last saw you."
Pheobe shook her head no and giggled, with the biggest, most happiest smile on her face. I couldn't help but smile back.
"Cute pj's," I said, winking at her. She was wearing the adorable nightgown Cam and I had gotten her for Christmas.
"I love these ones. They're so fuzzy and warm," she said, hugging herself.
When I looked up at Cam, I didn't receive the same warm welcome I had been looking forward to. "Pheebs, can you please go brush your teeth and get ready for bed?" Cam asked.
"Oh, Dad. I want to stay up with Abby. Can I please?"
"Pheobe. Now. You have school tomorrow." Cam had made it clear that he was angry, but I found it hard to believe he could be mad at her. She had seemed so happy when I arrived.
Pheobe huffed and puffed, then grumpily made her way to the bathroom. With her out of the room Cameron's gaze fell to me. I felt more than a little uneasy, with the tension between us being at an all-time high.
"Is there something you need to tell me?"
"No," I answered; his heated stare causing me to speak more vulgarly than I intended.
Cam stroked his bristly jaw. "I just got off the phone with Ashley. She tells me she was driving past your house tonight and saw you making out with some guy in your car." Cam paced so close it hurt. "Please tell me she's lying, Abigail."
I could tell his pride had been wounded and he was furious with me. He actually believed his back-stabbing sister, Ashley? I scowled at him, aggravated with the thought. "You know what? I think we’d better have that talk now,” I said. I had planned to tell him everything anyway. I only figured I could get through the god-damned door first.
He stormed away from me and sat down on the couch. The last thing I wanted right now was to be fighting, but I couldn't help the ache in my heart itching me to face the situation head on. Suddenly the phone rang. Cam slammed his fist on the coffee table, nearly breaking it in two, as Pheobe returned to the room.
"Daddy?" She looked so concerned that it broke my heart.
Cam narrowed his eyes at me. "I'm going to put Pheobe to bed. Why don't you get the phone? Then we'll talk." His voice had softened a bit, but I had to believe it was only for Pheobe's sake.
Not wanting any further confrontation, I hurried to the phone and answered quickly. "Hello?"
"Hey, it's me."
"Edwin?" I said, my voice scratchy and low.
"No, the milkman. Yeah, it's me."
"I can't believe you’re calling me here; especially tonight." I flashed an anxious glance down the hall. Cameron didn't materialize.
"Just let me say my part and then I'll leave you to do whatever it is that you do over there." He sounded calm; too calm for the little time that had passed since he had taken off.
The words had left my lips before I could think them through. "Make it quick."
"I think you're taking things too fast with Cam. You need to slow it down a bit. You don't really want to move in with him. If you want me to tone it down, I will. But you're making a huge mistake."
"If you're worried about how this will affect our arrangement with the house, don't. I'll still pay for half of the mortgage and taxes. You’ll just have to pick up the utilities."
"That's not it and you know it. Don't do it, Abs." His voice was strong and thick with emotion.
I hung up the phone, stunned by his orders. My hand clung to the receiver with a death grip and I stared at its base, waiting for it to ring again. It didn't.
Cameron walked into the room observing me in my frozen state. "Who was that?"
I swallowed the lump from the back of my throat. "Edwin."
"What did he want?" he asked, his voice cool and assessing.
"To tell me what a big mistake I'm making moving in with you."
Cameron nodded, like he wasn’t surprised. "And what did you tell him?"
"Nothing. I hung up on him."
Cam's face didn't hint as to what he was thinking, but he swiftly approached me and wrapped his arms snugly around my waist. He tucked my head gently on his shoulder and I nuzzled into him.
"I'm sorry for taking Ashley’s word," he whispered, next to my ear. "I should have given you the benefit of the doubt. Can you forgive me?" He pulled back and pressed his forehead against mine, our noses touching, his breath warm on my lips. "Please?"
My heart fluttered at his passionate pleading. I couldn't resist him another second. I tilted my head and softly brushed my lips against his. Once. Twice. Electricity passed through every soft touch, reigniting my desire for him.
Cameron exhaled a deep breath, dousing the flames running across my body. "Now that we have that out of the way, what is it you needed to tell me?"
CHAPTER SIX
I TOOK A SEAT on the edge of the bed and twiddled my thumbs, procrastinating. "Why don't you go first?"
"Alright. It's about Pheobe," Cameron said.
My heart squeezed, worried that it was a bad thing. My hand rested over my heart, as I placed my other trembling hand on his knee.
"I had a talk with her about you moving in.” He paused and my heart stopped. “Of course she's ecstatic about it."
Relief settled into my bones, making my limbs feel like noodles, my heart pattering at a terrifying pace. Then he spoke again and it terrified me.
“I’ve done a lot of thinking lately. When I ask you to marry me, and trust me I will ask you again, I would love for you agree to adopt Pheobe as your own."
My eyes grew wide and I held my breath, every emotion crashing together as I considered what he had just proposed.
"I know it may be premature and maybe a little sudden," he said, "but I think that Pheobe would love nothing more than to have a mother figure in her life. If that's something you'd be willing to consider, then I think it would make both her, and me, very happy."
"Wow. What can I say? I'm shocked; honoured, but shocked."
His thumb brushed softly over my knuckles. "I don't need your answer now. We can take it one step at a time. But I just wanted you to know where I see things going. If you ever think you're getting in too deep, you need to tell me." He rested his hand on top of mine and stared me in the eyes, his expression turning more serious. "You said you weren't kissing Edwin in your car and I believe you."
I swallowed, wanting to make myself clear, so there was no confusion later. "Edwin was in my car, and he did try to make a move on me after dinner."
Cameron winced, but squeezed my hand to stop me from explaining further. "Did you kiss him?"
"No."
"Then I don't want to hear another word about it."
"But you need to know he did kiss me,” I blurted. “I stopped him though, and I told him how it was going to be from now on.”
"And how is that?" Cam asked, an angled smile lighting his handsome face.
"I told him I'm moving in with you and that I need some space. He's pretty hard headed, but I think he finally got the point when I hung up on him tonight."
Cam smiled, and the twinkle returned to his eyes, just in time for my turn.
“I guess what I have to say is similar in nature. It’s about blended families,” I stated, drumming up some courage.
"You're going to have to elaborate on that one," Cam said, smirking.
"Babies," I blur
ted.
Cameron's eyes popped open and his mouth rounded out, his stunned expression rather disturbing. "Oh!"
"I've always wanted kids of my own and, while I would love to be that mother figure for Pheobe, it's just not the same. As long as I'm physically able, I'd like to make a baby of my own. Or two.”
Cameron’s mouth held that puckered O and his eyes drove through me like a dagger to my heart.
“Do you think Pheobe would be okay with having a little brother or sister?" More pressing, how do you feel about it? I was too petrified to ask.
"I can't," he said, releasing my knee, breaking all physical contact with me. "I'm sorry. I should have said something sooner."
My heart skipped a beat then began to pound hard and fast. "What?" I couldn’t even form a sentence, my tears clouding my thoughts.
"I can't have any more children, Abigail," he said, spelling it out for me.
"You're impotent?" I blurted, my disappointment obvious.
"No. I have no problem getting it up. But after Tessa died, I couldn't imagine ever bringing another child into this cruel world."
"And now?" I breathed, ready to shed my tears.
"I’ve been fixed. Problem solved. Now I can never do to another child what I’ve done to Pheobe.”
I gasped for a breath, unsure how I was supposed to take the news. "You haven’t done anything but love her, Cam. And if you truly feel guilty, don’t you think leaving her as an only child is equally as wrong?"
He closed his eyes and shook his head, placing a difficult distance between us emotionally. "You don't understand."
He was right. I didn’t understand. I didn’t understand why he didn’t tell me this before asking me to marry him. I didn’t understand why he thought I wouldn’t want a child of my own. And I didn’t understand why he was still so grief-stricken, that he couldn’t bear to bring another child into this existence.
I had fallen for Cameron hard and fast and his daughter was wrapped right up in that ball of mistakes. The happiness and pride that I had felt when Cam suggested I adopt Pheobe had swelled my heart to an immeasurable size, but I still couldn't imagine a life without bearing my own child.
A Twist of Fate (The Twisted Trilogy) Page 8