The Great Cat Nap

by A M Bostwick

  There was a tense silence. I could envision Madeline pushing her eggs around on her plate, abused and uneaten.

  “I didn’t mean to snap at you, Tess,” Madeline said. “I’m just so scared. I love Ruby so much. I’ve raised her since she was a kitten. She was a gift from my father, may he rest in peace. Why, I’d give anything to have her back with me right now. I’d never put her in another show again, if only—”

  Sloan and I didn’t hear the rest of Madeline’s sentiments. They were interrupted by a low, deep growl.

  “Paws up,” it said. “Back up you two. Nice and slow. NOW.”

  I froze. Beside me, I sensed Sloan doing the same. We turned cautiously and found ourselves cowering below a massive German Shepherd with massacre in his eyes.

  The hair on the German Shepherd’s back stood on end, his tail shooting out like an arrow, and his green-yellow eyes burning into ours. He looked agile, well-muscled, and 100 percent alert. The tips of chrome spikes adorning his collar flashed in the sunlight.

  “Follow me,” he growled quietly out the side of his mouth, sharp canines gleaming.

  I glanced at Sloan, and we warily followed the dog out of the brush before he turned and came behind us.

  “Maybe he’s a nice, friendly dog...” I whispered.

  “Walk behind the garage. Easy does it. Move it, guys,” the no-nonsense dog ordered, nudging us along like common criminals. “NOW.”

  “...except he’s, you know, just the opposite,” I finished lamely.

  We didn’t have the guts to consider making a run for it. This dog was 10 times our size, twice as fast, and 20 times as heavy. This was not good math. It was much too risky to provoke this guy, so we did exactly as we were told. Out of earshot from the house, Sloan and I stopped behind the garage near a well-tended vegetable garden. Would this be our final resting spot? I gulped. Tried to look cool. We turned and met the eyes of the giant dog.

  “Look, I’m sorry to intrude. I’m Ace, a reporter, and this is my friend, Sloan—” I began in a shaky voice.

  “We don’t need any reporters here,” the dog began in a low snarl, his haunches bent like he was about to spring; presumably to chase our no-good, trespassing furry butts off his property.

  “It’s Ruby I’m worried about. Ruby the Russian. She’s missing, right? Maybe stolen? I want to help bring her back,” I said.

  Something in the eyes of the great shepherd changed at the sound of Ruby’s name.

  “Huh?”

  “Ruby. I heard she’s missing. I want to help,” I added, knowing full well at that moment that my intentions went far beyond an article. I wanted to solve the case. I wanted Ruby to come home safely. No matter where the story took me.

  The German Shepherd looked over his shoulder, and then laid down to better look at our faces. All of the fight seemed to have gone out of him, replaced by simple curiosity.

  “Ruby went missing yesterday. POOF. Just like that,” the dog said, shaking his enormous head.

  “Exactly what I heard,” I said. “Something doesn’t seem right. I apologize for entering your property uninvited. I thought it would help me put together some clues.”

  The dog nodded. “My name is Aero,” he said after a beat. “I’m the McMahon watchdog. Though I’m also a housedog. Ruby is the only other animal here. We’re good friends.”

  I heard a catch in the dog’s voice. Despite his intimidating size and threatening appearance, this was an animal who cared about his companions and his cat. I relaxed slightly; Aero was plainly a sheep in wolf’s clothing.

  “Why do you want to help?” he asked me, suspicion in his voice.

  “Ace here solved a serious crime a few months ago,” Sloan piped up. Aero’s eyes grew wide with interest. “A murder. It was a big deal. He tracked down the real killer and we helped bring him to justice. We worked with this cat, who belonged to the wrongly accused woman. In the end, it was all set right. You can trust Ace. You can trust us.”

  Aero looked at me. “That true?”

  “Well, I, uh,” I began haltingly.

  “He’s too modest to tell you what a great detective and reporter he is,” Sloan interjected again, shamelessly selling me like a late night infomercial. “This is the guy you want on your side. If he can solve a murder, he can solve a cat-napping.”

  “What do you charge?” Aero asked me.

  “I, geez. I hadn’t even thought about...”

  “Last time, a few cans of tuna, plus expenses,” Sloan interrupted for a third time. I wished my sidekick came with a mute button.

  “I can do tuna. You’re hired.”

  I coughed. While finding Ruby was certainly part of my personal mission, I hadn’t expected employment by a private party again. I sort of figured I’d work on my own clock this time. Less opportunity for anyone to get hurt again. But Sloan smiled, fiend that he was, and Aero looked so hopeful I couldn’t possibly crush his spirit.

  “You don’t owe me anything unless I bring Ruby home,” I said, ignoring the panic rising in my heart.

  “Agreed. What now? What do you need to know?”

  We all feel silent as we heard a garage door open, then slam. The entrance door rumbled open, and a shiny black sedan slowly made its way down the drive.

  “Madeline, with Tess. Looking for Ruby,” Aero said sadly. We watched as they disappeared down the street.

  “Tell me about the day Ruby went missing,” I asked.

  “It was just like any other day,” Aero said, looking off into the distance. “I was let outside for my first morning run and perimeter checks. All was well, so I entered back into the kitchen where breakfast was served. Ruby always eats on the counter above me in her crystal dish. We exchanged our usual morning banter before she went off for her first morning nap in the sunshine of the library. I went back outside for round two of perimeter checks and detailed smelling. This usually takes me awhile.”

  Aero inhaled sharply.

  “I was at the back of the property with John the gardener when I felt like something just wasn’t right,” he said. “Normally, I finish up my second rounds by 11 a.m., well on time to catch the mailman. I frighten and bully him on a daily basis, to make sure he knows who’s boss around here. But this feeling wouldn’t go away, so I made my way back to the house around 10 a.m. and went inside. Mrs. McMahon had left early for a meeting at the ladies’ society. Mr. McMahon leaves each morning before the sun is up, so he was long gone. It was just Tess inside, and Ruby. Only...I couldn’t find Ruby.”

  “What do you mean?” I asked gently.

  “Ruby always takes her morning nap in the library, like I said. She’s there until I get back; then she comes back downstairs for a snack before she moves onto the front sun porch,” he assured. “But Ruby wasn’t on the sun porch like usual. And she wasn’t snacking. Or in the library, sleeping late. Or in the kitchen. I searched the entire house. I even missed chasing the mailman that day, I was so frantic looking for her. He arrived early and left the porch with a package—usually I just love to chase him off our property with a few good growling snaps, but I was too despondent. All I could do was send him off from inside the house with a few snarling barks. Ruby was gone. Nothing was out of place, but she was nowhere. I sniffed the entire yard, trying to catch her scent outside, just in case. But I couldn’t. She’s not an outside cat, you know. I barked, but Tess didn’t understand. It wasn’t until Mrs. McMahon came home just after noon that I could communicate something was terribly wrong. Ruby was missing.”

  “Tell me, did you pick up any strange odors during your indoor checks?” I asked.

  “No. All the usual suspects.”

  “Who are?”

  Aero thought. “Myself, Ruby, Mr. and Mrs. McMahon, Mrs. McMahon’s sister, and Tess.”

  “Does Mrs. McMahon’s sister visit often?” I asked.

  “At least weekly. Don’t ask me why; the two don’t get along terribly well.”

  Interesting. “Why not?” I inquired.


  “I can’t say for sure, but the sister, Ellin, also shows cats. Only, she never wins prizes. Maybe a second or third place, but nothing like Ruby’s wins,” Aero said. “Ellin is newly single, and might be selling her house. I think it has to do with money. The sisters often argue about who had more as a kid, who was liked more...I don’t know. It all seems silly to me. I don’t even know where any of my sisters or brothers are. They should be happy just to have each other.”

  “Okay, let me get this straight,” I said. “The last one to see Ruby was you, when she was leaving to take her normal nap in the library, correct?”

  Aero nodded confidently.

  “Did you actually see her in the library?”

  “No, I didn’t. But she was headed in that direction when I went outside. Just about every day when I return inside, she’s already done with her snack, waiting impatiently on the porch for me,” Aero looked upward sadly. “I never thought I’d miss her snide remarks about me dogging around with my big, ugly nose to the ground.”

  “Is is possible Ellin could have been here that morning? That you may not have noticed her?”

  “I don’t think so,” Aero said uncertainly. “I’d hear her car.”

  “What if she parked down the street and walked?”

  Aero examined his paw. “I guess it’s possible. Had I been distracted, say, by John’s egg sandwich, yeah. I suppose someone could have walked up to the house while I was in the backyard.”

  I nodded. “Okay. Tell me about this mailman fellow.”

  Aero’s ears pointed up. “I’ve got a handle on him. He knows who’s superior.”

  “But what kind of a person would you say he is? Are you sure this was the same mailman as usual? Not, say, a substitute?” I pressed, curious.

  “Person? Well, he doesn’t hate me as much as I wish he did. Sure, he runs when I chase him, but it’s like his heart really isn’t into it.” Aero paused and Sloan raised an eyebrow at me. “And no, he wasn’t a substitute. It was Frank all right. I remember the lingering smell from his socks. Look, Ace. It wasn’t him. He liked Ruby fine. He delivers her trophies and ribbons all the time, not to mention all the cat food and treats sent by the companies that want to hire her for their ad campaigns.” Aero rolled his eyes.

  I pondered. Aero was young, smart, sophisticated, and didn’t miss a thing. If he said the mailman was the mailman, I knew he was right. The next question I hesitated to ask, but as a reporter I knew I had to.

  “Aero, would Ruby have reason to go off on her own? Alone?”

  The German Shepherd looked surprised but was not offended. “Believe me, Ace, I asked myself the same thing,” he said. “There hasn’t been a robbery. There hasn’t been a single strange person at the house. What does it look like? Like she left. I know, but I would have smelled her if she left the property by herself. I’m sure of it. You have to trust me, Ace. Ruby wouldn’t leave of her own accord.”

  I reached out and patted his large paw. “I believe you. Can you tell me why Ruby wouldn’t leave by herself?”

  “She loved it here, plain and simple. Look around,” the dog said, gesturing to his surroundings. “This is a great home, with great companions. We love our day-to-day routine. Ruby never complained. Oh, sure, she could be moody as the day is long. But she’s a cat, that’s a cat thing, right?”

  The circumstances reminded me of one of those crime television shows where a person was victimized at their own residence. Since the door showed no signs of forced entry, the authorities would speculate the victim knew the perpetrator. Right now, I felt Ruby knew her possible captor.

  “Looking at the information you’ve told me, I’m inclined to suspect only a handful of people. Tell me if I’m right, Aero,” I began. “The gardener. The maid. The jealous sister. And most far-fetched, Mr. or Mrs. McMahon.”

  “All ludicrous suggestions!” Aero scoffed.

  “As an unbiased investigator, that’s what I see. Now tell me why I’m wrong,” I asked.

  “Okay. John the gardener is only here once a week, maybe more in the summer. He was busy trimming trees for winter at the far back of the property. John never goes in the house. I saw him leave, carrying only his clippers and coffee cup. He couldn’t have entered the house in that timeframe without me noticing him, no way no how, much less smuggle Ruby.”

  I considered that. A man who never entered the house wouldn’t know the layout. He wouldn’t know where to find Ruby.

  “Tess Vatter, our housekeeper is elderly and kind,” Aero went on. “She’s been with this family for over 15 years. She’d never have reason to cat-nap Ruby, nor did she open the door for any strangers that day. Mr. and Mrs. McMahan would never, ever hurt Ruby! They weren’t even home, and they couldn’t and wouldn’t arrange for an outsider. I would’ve smelled him. Ellin may be jealous and have a bit of a mean streak, but, but...”

  My heart jumped. “Yes?”

  “She wouldn’t steal Ruby.” He paused. “Would she?”

  Aha! A glitch in the list of alleged innocent suspects.

  “Where was Ellin during the time of Ruby’s disappearance?” I asked. “Could she have dropped by?”

  “I don’t know for sure,” Aero said.

  “Does Ellin have any animals I might be able to talk to?” I asked. “Witnesses?”

  Aero nodded. “Yes, she has three cats she takes to shows. They’re sisters, Himalayans. They live just up the road from here.”

  “Himalayans; the cats that look like their faces were hit with a frying pan?” I asked.

  “Yup.”

  “What are their names?”

  “Uno, Dos, Tres.”

  “I see. Clever,” I said, taking mental notes at a fast pace. “Would you mind if I did a routine walk-through your house? It won’t take but fifteen minutes. I just need to sniff around, get a feel for the place.”

  Aero nodded. “Yeah, but you better hurry. Avoid Tess, and don’t drop any hair. She would yell at me for shedding more than normal. Trust me, she knows.” I motioned for Sloan to follow.

  The McMahon house was immaculate. The entryway opened up into a hallway with a winding cherry stairway. Off to the sides, several doors lead to more immaculate rooms. The kitchen appeared at the end of the hall. I sniffed the air: Humans, Aero and something lighter...feline. Ruby.

  “You go upstairs, I’ll run the downstairs,” I said to Sloan. “Stand guard, will you, Aero?”

  “I’ll be here at the front door,” Aero said, taking his stance. “I don’t know how long my people will be gone, so be quick.”

  The study was dry, Ruby must not have spent much time here. I padded down to the dining room, keeping my back and tail low, darting glances every which way. Midday sunshine slanted in through the floor-to-ceiling windows, the maples outside flickering like a campfire. I sniffed the rug; someone had dropped a chicken leg a few days ago. In the kitchen, I sneezed. Cleaning solution overpowered nearly anything useful, but the certain regular scents of two human companions, one dog, and one cat were still apparent. I assumed Tess was in the mix as well, but it was too difficult to tell. Peeking out the door, I scanned the hallway. Aero remained at his post. I darted down the hall to the living room as fast as I could.

  “Is that necessary?” Aero called to me. “Why do cats run so fast for no apparent reason?”

  I didn’t answer, I was investigating. A patterned sofa sat plump with pillows and throw blankets with fringes I’d like to shred. A large dog bed sat under a windowsill, a cat tree tucked alongside it. I eyed the cat tree, saw a few jingle balls, and an expensive-looking silk catnip mouse. Wouldn’t a cat take her silk mouse if she were leaving?

  Off the living room I saw the sun porch. Carefully, I stepped inside. Oohhh, yes. A cat could get used to this. The sun sunk into my back, easing the muscles and relaxing my aching tendons. Slowly, I circled the sparse but tasteful furniture. It was apparent where Ruby spent most of her time—here on her bed on top of the bookshelf. Even the maid couldn’t vacuum all th
e velvet gray hair from its fleece. I tried to imagine someone—Ellin, the gardener, the maid—handling Ruby and smuggling her out of there. It didn’t fit.

  “Ace!” I turned.

  “Sloan! Did you find anything?”

  Sloan shook his head and stepped onto the sun porch, his body tense and eyes alert. “Ooooo. Ahhhhh. Wow, this is nice!”

  “Right. About the case?” I urged.

  “Huh?” Sloan asked, stretching long in the sunshine’s warmth.

  “Upstairs?” I reminded him.

  Aero let out a sudden little bark. We both jumped. “Madeline and Tess will probably be back here any time now. Let’s get outside before we’re busted,” he shouted from the front door.

  We obliged and left to meet up with Aero.

  “Sorry, Ace. Nothing but the usual suspects and some nice comforters upstairs,” Sloan said to me in the side yard. “The library had Ruby’s scent all over, but nothing unusual.”

  “That’s all right. At least we know.” I turned to the massive dog. “Aero, you’ve been an immense help. Is there anything else you can tell me?”

  Aero thought for a moment. “Just that I’m worried about Ruby. She’s an experienced show cat, sure. She’s seen a good part of the world, but she doesn’t know the real world. She needs help. I can feel it.”

  “I don’t think Ruby left on purpose, either. I believe she was stolen,” I said with certainty. Ellin. Ruby would trust Ellin enough to go with her. It would explain the lack of new human scent, no signs of struggle. Was it her jealousy? Or did she want money? Humans always want more money. “On this basis, I would expect you and your companions to receive a ransom note in the next few days, if not today. Keep your ears perked up for anything unusual, anything at all. Let us know right away if there is. Anything to add, Sloan?”

  “How can we reach you here?” he asked Aero.

  “Give me your number, Ace. I’ll give you any updates I hear around here, especially about this possible ransom note.”

  “If Max picks up, just dial again after dark,” I instructed, reciting the numbers. “Leave a blank message if I’m not in. I’ll ring back soon as I can.”