Forty-Four Book Thirteen (44 13)

by Jools Sinclair

  And, of course, it reminded me of Ty.

  I looked out at the water, trying to feel nothing but gratitude for the good times, trying to throw all my regret into the river. Kate’s phone buzzed and I glanced over in her direction. As she read the text she pumped a fist in the air.

  “They just released a statement,” she shouted above the roar of the rapids. “No charges.”

  I gave her a small smile and then went back to staring at the water.

  CHAPTER 66

  I knew David would sleep in until at least noon, so I headed over to the rec center on the east side of town. I hadn’t gone for a run in nearly three weeks and I hadn’t touched a soccer ball in a lot longer. It was time to get back out there. It would help clear my mind and maybe also help clear out some of the darkness in my soul.

  After I did about a mile of dribbling around the soccer fields, I started in on sprints up and down the pitch. I pretty much had the place to myself except for a few people crossing the grass with their pets, heading to the adjacent dog park. I pushed the ball out ahead of me and ran between the nets.

  Maybe I’ll coach a youth team, I told myself. But then my mind and my feet stopped when I saw him standing in the goal box.

  “Come on, Craigers,” he yelled. “Hit me with your best shot.”

  I smiled as I closed in on him, picking out a spot. But when I took the shot, rusty as an old tin can out in the Badlands, it sailed like a kite, way too high.

  “Man, that was really, really awful! It brings to mind Roberto Baggio.”

  “How do you remember that?” I said.

  “How do you not?”

  I ran into his arms and he lifted me up in the air. When he put me down, I stared at him. Jesse looked fine, a lot better than when we were in Idaho.

  “How are you feeling?” I asked.

  “Feeling like I’m not gonna let you score today.”

  We played for about fifteen minutes and he was right. He lunged and jumped and blocked every one of my shots. I didn’t score once. When I was done, he ran out of the box, arms up in the air.

  “I’m back.” He picked up the ball and started spinning it on his finger. “What about you, Craigers?”

  “I’m better, too.”

  “You sure?”

  I nodded.

  “That’s a nice garden you got growing in the backyard.”

  “You’ve seen it?”

  “Yeah, I’ve been by. How long is Kate staying?”

  “I’m kicking her out soon. She needs to get back to work.”

  He threw the ball high in the air and then headed it hard into the top left corner. I was about to go after it when he pulled me down onto the grass and laughed.

  “You seem happy, Jesse.”

  “Never happier. I’m just about ready to start our new life together.”

  He looked so real. I put my hand up and touched his cheek. He smiled and gazed into my eyes.

  “I can’t wait, Craigers. I can’t wait to be with you again.”

  A warm shiver rolled down my back.

  “I love you, Jesse,” I whispered.

  His lips found mine and we fell into those roaring flames again, hot and sweet and full of everything I ever wanted in the world and beyond.

  In that long moment, nothing mattered except us and the dream of being together.

  CHAPTER 67

  David dragged the last suitcase outside and stuffed it next to the others in the back of his muscle car.

  “Let me drive, Abby Craig.”

  “No way. Not after all those mimosas you were chugging at breakfast. Besides, I haven’t driven a car in a long time and I’m looking forward to it. Get in.”

  “Okay, okay,” he said, putting on his sunglasses.

  He turned and waved goodbye again to Kate as she stood on the porch watching us pull away.

  “I wish I could stay longer!” he said.

  “Me, too. But we’ll see each other again soon.”

  I drove down the street grinding the gears a little and making David squirm, but it soon came back to me and I was in the groove again, working the stick shift effortlessly.

  “So I was right,” David said.

  “About?”

  “About Samael being an angel.”

  I had given him a quick recap the night before.

  “Yeah, you called it,” I said. “Although, he definitely was not cute or cuddly.”

  David pouted. He insisted in believing in a sappy Disney version of angels.

  “He was under a great deal of stress,” he said. “Maybe you just didn’t get a chance to see that side of him.”

  “I suppose that might explain part of—”

  “I knew it!” he said. “I just knew that kind and loving angels are all around us.”

  I looked over, thinking that kind and loving still weren’t exactly the first words that came to mind when describing Samael. But maybe they weren’t so far off. Samael had helped stop Nathaniel Mortimer from destroying the world, after all, which in a way was the ultimate act of love.

  David found Beyoncé on the stereo, making the car thump and vibrate, while I merged onto the parkway that would take us to Redmond.

  “I love this song!” Before I knew it, he was arm dancing and singing along about not dropping alcohol. “Love it!”

  “Yeah, I can see that.”

  “Hey! When are you coming out to Hollywood? I’ll be back there at the end of the week filming my new movie. Why don’t you just meet me? You can come mingle with the celebrities while I’m getting my buff and puff.”

  “Your what?”

  “Hair and makeup,” he said. “Stay for as long as want. We could be roomies again, just like old times!”

  “Thanks, David. It sounds great, but I’m good here for now.”

  He unrolled the window and a jet stream of hot air rushed in.

  “All right, but really, what do you have going on here in Smallville, USA? I’m offering you Ryan Gosling and you’re settling for Mo and Lyle. Hey, girl, what gives?”

  I looked over at him.

  “Funny you should say that. Mike sent me a text last night saying I could have my old job back.”

  David shook his head.

  “Yeah, I know,” I said.

  “That would be taking three steps backward. What you need, Abby Craig, is to go forward. You know what I see in your future?”

  “A bottle of whiskey and a typewriter?”

  “Yes, yes, yes!” he said. “Although I was going to say vodka and a laptop.”

  Not in a million years would I have given David’s crazy idea about writing a book a second thought, but with all the money I owed him, it felt wrong to say no. I didn’t know what would come of it, but it seemed only fair to try.

  “So you’re saying yes to the book?”

  “Yes, I’m saying yes,” I said. “But I’ll need some help. I don’t know the first thing about writing anything, let alone a book.”

  “Yay! It’ll be easy. All you need to do is tell the story and then we’ll hire a ghost writer for the rest. I’m sure you must know a few.” He laughed and I joined in. “And I’m pretty sure my agent can get you a nice advance.”

  My mouth formed an o.

  “And you know the best part?” he said.

  “What’s that?”

  “I’ll be able to play myself in the movie! Yay!”

  “Hey, before I forget, thanks for all the public support, you know, when I was out there on the road,” I said. “I know that things looked bad, with everyone thinking I was a murderer. It was nice to have someone on my side.”

  “Abby Craig, the second the news broke that you were suspected of killing Dr. Ben, I knew they were full of it because you are incapable of murder.”

  I didn’t say anything. I had blown up that boat, killing Nathaniel’s crew. I was not only capable, but given the right circumstances, willing.

  “There’s something I have to talk to you about,” David said, turn
ing off the music. “Something serious.”

  I was pretty sure I knew where he was going. He hadn’t talked about Ty once the whole visit.

  “Lay it on me.”

  “Just hear me out, okay? He loves you. He told me that himself.”

  “When did you talk to him?”

  “We always talk! We’re best bros. I helped him pick out your beautiful engagement ring, remember?”

  I looked over at him.

  “You need to talk to him. It’s not too late.”

  “It is, David. It is too late.”

  “If you two really love each other, like I know you do, you’ll find a way to make it work. Just tell him what’s in your heart.”

  I didn’t answer.

  “So you’re just going to walk away from your dream cowboy?”

  I shrugged.

  “You still love him, don’t you?”

  “Of course I do, but that’s not the point.”

  “Not the point? There is no other point.” He waved me off. “I don’t get your attitude, Abby Craig.”

  I took in a breath and released it slowly.

  “All I know is that love hurts,” I said finally.

  “Sometimes, sure. But love is everything. And the old Abby Craig knew that. Fairytale or not, she believed in love.”

  I stared out at the road, the high desert rushing by.

  “I guess I’m not the same person anymore, David.”

  He sighed.

  “I hope you’re wrong,” he said quietly.

  I accelerated, forgetting for a moment about the cops that liked to point their radar guns at drivers on this stretch of road.

  “Okay, I’ve said what I wanted to say,” David said. “We’re still besties, right?”

  “Always.”

  “Oh, yay. Double yay!” He smiled. “Now let’s get back to Bey.”

  He turned up the music and started moving his arms again and tapping his feet. I exited onto Airport Road and he rolled up the window, pulled over the rearview, and ran his fingers through his hair.

  “You can just drop me.”

  “No way,” I said. “I’m basking in every David Norton second that I can. I’m parking and helping you with your monster luggage, and then while we wait in line to check you in, I want to talk some more about the book.”

  He looked over and smiled.

  “I love you, Abby Craig.”

  “I love you, too, David Norton.”

  CHAPTER 68

  “I can stay longer,” Kate said as she slapped her credit card down on the counter. “There’s nothing pressing at work that I can’t do from here.”

  I had been trying to get her to leave for more than a week, but I sensed that this was the first time she was really open to it.

  “I’m better now and everything has settled down. Look around. Here we are out at Old Mill and we haven’t seen one reporter all day. I want you to get back to your job. And your boyfriend, too.”

  “Boyfriend,” she repeated. “That sounds so high school, doesn’t it? I’m always at a loss when I introduce him.”

  “I know Mo would agree,” I said.

  “She still dating Officer Mulrooney?”

  “Yeah, in fact he was there when I dropped by Back Street the other day. Anyway, whatever you want to call him, I can’t wait to meet him.”

  The saleswoman finished ringing up her purchases and handed Kate the bag.

  “Why don’t you just come with me to Portland for a little while? Lyle and Paloma can take care of the garden.”

  “No, I’m happy to be home.”

  “Of course,” she said and smiled.

  We got some coffee and walked, looking in all the store windows. I glanced over at Mt. Bachelor, noticing how it was all lit up by a thin streak of sunlight that had broken through the thick clouds creeping across the sky.

  “All right,” Kate finally said. “If you’re really sure you’re okay, I’ll head out tomorrow.”

  “I’m really sure.”

  “Are you keeping that motorcycle?”

  “Yeah, for now,” I said. “But I have David’s car, too.”

  “Good. You can use it in the winter.”

  I nodded.

  Just as we got to her car, the storm started. Hard drops pounded on the windshield like a good old-fashioned Bend summer rainstorm, cooling everything off within a few moments, and releasing the fresh scent of pine and juniper into the air.

  I breathed it in.

  “God, I’ve missed this.”

  “Oh, hey, if I’m taking off in the morning, I have to show you something before I leave.”

  “Sure,” I said. “What is it?”

  “Well, you’ll see. It’s not quite done yet, but it’s close enough.”

  She drove east through the rain.

  CHAPTER 69

  We headed down Highway 20 and then turned, following the signs for the hospital.

  “This place sure has been a big part of our lives over the years,” Kate said, pulling into the parking structure and cutting the engine.

  I sighed, not wanting to be here. The last time I was at St. Charles, Ben was lying in a pool of blood at my feet.

  “Come on,” she said, grabbing her purse. “I promise. It’s a good thing.”

  I followed her through the double doors and then past the reception area and down a hallway as a black wave of sadness filled my heart.

  We went down another corridor that led outside. There was a small courtyard area in the middle of the building with a few benches and flowers and a running fountain. As I got closer I saw a steel sign with Ben’s face sketched into the metal along with some words.

  This garden is dedicated to the memory of our colleague and friend, Dr. Benjamin Mortimer, who worked tirelessly for those in need here at St. Charles.

  “Kate, this is beautiful.”

  I gave her a hug.

  “He needed something, Abby. He was a good man. He spent his life helping people. He had a real passion for it.”

  “He did.”

  “When I was planning this I talked to so many people who really loved him. They said how he was always kind to everyone, even under pressure in the ER, and so committed to his work. He was a phenomenal doctor. Remember after your accident how he would stop over at the house all the time just to see how you were doing?”

  “I remember.” Even with all the years in between, sometimes it still felt like yesterday. “I think he really would have liked this.”

  “It’s not done yet. We’re going to put in a few trees over there so it will be a little more private. And down the line, we’re adding an enclosed butterfly garden. You know, for the kids here. Ben loved kids.”

  Kate bent over some flowers and pulled out a few microscopic weeds as I looked around for Ben’s ghost, hoping to find him sitting on one of the benches and listening to the birds. But he wasn’t there. I told myself that it was a good thing, that it meant that he was no longer haunted, that he had gone into the light and crossed the river that would take him to God.

  I took Kate’s hand in mine and with the other ran my fingers over the plaque and bowed my head.

  CHAPTER 70

  I stared at the morning light stretching out across the sky and walked over to the trailhead, glancing up at the mountain. Judging from the parking lot, I was the only one here and that was fine with me. It would give me room to think.

  It was going to be a hard hike.

  I’d done it once before, when I was a teenager and our coach had the entire team run up the trail as fast as we could while he timed us. It was a steep climb, twelve hundred feet of elevation gain in one and a half miles.

  I started. My lungs and calves burned right away and a steady stream of cold, foggy breath filled the trail that led through the dark pines.

  As I walked I thought of Samael. I hoped that God would find a way to one day rescue him. I thought of my backyard and the pond and the plants and how when this day was over, I’d sit out th
ere for a long, long time, until the stars came out.

  I was breathing hard, sweating all the way up, but I had found a rhythm.

  I thought about my future and came to the conclusion that I wouldn’t go back to cooking school. As much as I wanted to, it wasn’t in the cards for me. Being a full-time chef meant sixty-hour work weeks and a thousand percent commitment, especially at the beginning. I couldn’t do that. Not anymore.

  I had fought it and run from it for years and years, but I now finally accepted that my place in life was to use my gift to help people. This was the real reason I came back after I drowned. I answered a call then and I would continue to do so for as long as I could. I would see ghosts, listen to their stories, help solve crimes, and maybe unite a few lost souls along the way. And like I had told Jesse, even though Nathaniel was gone, there was still plenty of evil in the world.

  The decision felt good and right and a long time coming.

  As I headed out of the trees and the views opened up, I could feel the tears in my eyes. I swiped them away.

  I had to be strong.

  Strong for both of us.

  I reached the clearing and stopped to catch my breath. The sun was higher. I took a moment to look out over the scenery.

  There was so much to see. Broken Top and South Sister. Middle and North Sisters and Jefferson. I could even make out Mt. Hood in the far distance.

  But there was really only one mountain that I cared about now, the one just across the way, right in front of me.

  The mountain of beginnings and endings.

  CHAPTER 71

  I found him standing on the trail, his arms crossed over his chest.

  “So you just woke up and decided to hike up here, huh?” he said.

  I saw the hurt in his eyes as he stared at me and then over at Mt. Bachelor and then back to me again.

  “I’m glad you’re here,” I said, holding his gaze and hoping he couldn’t hear my heart shattering into a million pieces.

  CHAPTER 72