Fighting the Undertow

by Eden Rivers

  “Are you naked?”

  “Naked and rock hard. My balls have been trying to crawl up under my skin all night. I had time to imagine about nine different scenarios before I got your message. What you described, that’s better than any of my fantasies.”

  She let her hand trace a tantalizing line along her inner thigh. “In your notes, I liked it when you told me what to do.”

  Silence, then a slow intake of breath.

  “Valerie?”

  She shivered.

  “Yes?”

  “Pick up the nipple clamps.”

  Ohshitohshitohshit! Did she want to carry it this far? Let him call the shots now, when her body felt warm and languid after an experience that shook her to her very center?

  “Now, Val.”

  No mistaking the twitch of her clit in response to his firm command. She hadn’t told him she liked being bossed around just to make conversation. By now, she knew full well he’d leap at the invitation for more play.

  Fumbling under the folds of the top sheet, she felt around until she felt cool metal under her fingertips.

  “What next?”

  “I’ve got my hand tight around my cock, and I think the noises you’re about to make are going to make me very hot. Ready?”

  “I think so.”

  In the past, the slight note of hesitation in her voice would have been enough to elicit his reassurance. He would have reminded her she didn’t have to do anything she didn’t want to, that they could play this another way. But in this new game, that’s not what she wanted to hear.

  He didn’t let her down.

  “I want you to slide off the bed and kneel on a pillow.”

  Sensing what she was about to do with him would be easier in the dark, she leaned over to switch off the light before grabbing a pillow and settling on the floor beside the bed.

  “Okay.” She felt submissive kneeling naked on the floor. More so than the time he’d pulled out the leather wrist restraints. But her body seemed to have forgotten she’d climaxed not long ago, and she didn’t intend to question why she enjoyed this game so much.

  “We’re going to have to do this fast, because you’ve got me so hot after your e-mail, I’m not going to last long. I’ve got my dick in my hand, Val, and I’m thinking of how good it would feel to have your mouth on me right now.”

  Holy shit, he had her hot and bothered already, and she hadn’t even touched herself yet.

  “Put the clamps back on, Val. But closer to the tips of your nipples this time.”

  Without hesitation, she set the phone down for a second and secured the first clamp as instructed. Her head dropped back and she moaned, low and soft. She knew this place, but she hadn’t gotten here until right at the end last time. Rather than fighting the sensations, her body wrapped around the burn, and she wanted to growl and writhe on the floor, it felt so good. She grabbed the phone, but couldn’t seem to find her voice.

  “I can hear you breathing, Val. Come on, now the second one.”

  She cradled the phone against her shoulder and secured the second clamp. “Mmmmmmmm!” With both clamps in place, it was all she could do to wait for his instructions. Streaks of liquid silver shot through her body, shattering in little sunbursts behind her closed eyelids. Sitting up, gravity worked with her ‑‑ or against her ‑‑ tugging the chain and moving the clamps with every breath.

  “Ian, I need…”

  “Shh. I know what you need. Slide your fingers into your pussy ‑‑ three of them.”

  As wet skin spread around her fingers, she hissed her satisfaction.

  “I love the sounds you make, sweet Valerie. And I can imagine the tension in your face, the set of your jaw, the way you’re tossing your head against the heat, hungry to come.”

  “Please, ohmygod, I can’t…”

  “Sure you can. Stay with me. I’m…” He paused, and his rumbling moan sent shivers along her spine. “I’m almost there, and I want you there with me. Press your fingers deep inside your pussy. Fuck yourself. And with your other hand, move the chain a little.”

  Gasping, she slid her fingers deep along the contours of her pelvic bone, pressing forward where it felt best.

  “Now, Val! Now!”

  Desperate to join him, she grasped the chain and pulled, spread her fingers wide inside her pussy, and let the raw passion of his cries lift her out of herself.

  “Ian.” His name escaped in a hoarse whisper as she arched backward, pressing against the side of the bed for support. And again, she flew. Soared free of herself, left rules and expectations behind, and welcomed the dark, searing pulse of her climax.

  Some shred of rational thought made its way through the chaos of sensation, and she remembered to release the clamps, pushing herself through a wall of heat and into a realm where there was only sound and color and pleasure-pain so intense, she wanted it to stop ‑‑ and wanted it to go on forever.

  Vaguely conscious that at some point she’d dropped the phone and collapsed into a heap on the floor, she pushed her hair out of her face and tried to sit up. The world reeled and tilted for a second, but she managed to locate the phone and lean back against the bed.

  “Ian?”

  She could hear voices in the background ‑‑ Abby’s and Tyler’s, shit! ‑‑ and Ian seemed to be explaining something to them.

  “Ian?”

  “Hang on a minute.”

  More muffled conversation, then an audible exhalation of breath.

  “Sorry, I’m back. Are you okay?”

  “Okay doesn’t begin to describe how good I’m feeling right now. What was that about?”

  “I made a lot of noise near the end, and Tyler and Abby had a bet going as to whether I was on the phone with you. It’s okay. They’re gone now.”

  If she hadn’t already been flushed from her climax, she had no doubt she’d feel a stain of heat creeping up her chest and across her face. For people who weren’t shy about having sex on the rug in the den ‑‑ with spectators ‑‑ she supposed phone sex hardly merited a raised eyebrow. But she felt all squirmy inside at the thought that Abby and Tyler knew she’d been masturbating while on the phone with Ian.

  “What did you tell them?”

  “Relax. I told them yes, I was on the phone with you and to please get lost. The apartment’s quiet now, so I suspect they went off to have sex.”

  Okay, glad to help provide a little spark for our friends’ love life.

  “Come on, don’t get all quiet on me. After what we just did together, you’re edgy because they know we were having phone sex?”

  Exactly. After “what we just did together!” I’m edgy about them knowing we were having phone sex. “Okay, I’m over it. Say something sweet to me. I’m all wet and limp and exhausted, and I could use a hug about now.”

  “It’s always like that. At least it is for me, too, after I do anything edgy, or new. I wish I was there to put my arms around you.”

  Soothed by the affection in his voice, she crawled up on the bed and curled into the nest of pillows.

  “What would count, for you? I mean, what makes you feel sort of hollow afterward, but in a good way? Like you want to press your face into someone’s shoulder and hide against the warmth of their skin?” Although the answer would include things he’d done with someone other than her, she was genuinely curious.

  “Oh, hell, that discussion could take all night.”

  Wow. She shivered as she imagined what Ian might do with Jeremy, things that could leave him feeling as vulnerable as she felt right now.

  “Okay, let’s just say I wouldn’t introduce you to anything edgy that I hadn’t experienced first myself.”

  Wow! The thought of Ian wearing clamps on his small, hard nipples sent a series of shudders down her spine.

  “Val?”

  “I’m here. Just thinking about that makes me hot. What else have you and Jeremy…?”

  “Abby.”

  “What?”

  “Sorry
. Is that too much information? It’s not something I’ve done with Jer. His edges are less subtle.”

  Oh, hell, and didn’t that get her imagination going!

  “It’s okay, I’m just trying to picture sweet little Abby…”

  She waited for his laughter to die down.

  “Miss Vee, Abby may look as fresh as sunshine in those bright colors she likes to wear, but she looks pretty good in leather, too.”

  Val squirmed against the sheets, but not with embarrassment.

  “She kissed me on the beach the other day. Twice.” No doubt something he should know. Whatever happened between her and their friends, no matter how minor, she wanted things out in the open.

  “Ian?”

  “Sorry, just giving that image the moment of consideration it deserved. You made me hard again. Did you like it?”

  Good question. “I was ‑‑ surprised. But I didn’t not like it, if that makes sense.”

  He chuckled again, and she tried to push the image of Abby wearing black leather and holding a whip out of her mind.

  “Okay, now I need you to say something sweet again.” Val, queen of insecurity.

  “I love you, Valerie Keating.”

  Panic. Throat-tightening, stomach-clenching panic.

  “I’m sorry ‑‑ I didn’t mean ‑‑ I wasn’t fishing…”

  “Shh. Just accept it. I know that’s not what you were expecting to hear. I just needed to say it.”

  Now what should she say? As she pressed her face against the cool cloth of the pillowcase, her fear evaporated. The truth. Just the truth, and they’d deal with painful choices when the time came.

  “I love you too.” The words felt right, and she could almost imagine he was beside her, stroking her face and neck.

  “I know. When we’re together again, I’m going to hold you for hours. But now, I think it’s time to say good night.”

  “Sorry, I forgot you have to work tomorrow. I’m starving, anyway. I’m going to go raid the freezer and see if Brenda left any Ben & Jerry’s. Good night.”

  “’Night.”

  She held the phone against her chest for a minute after he disconnected. Had tonight really happened, or had she dreamed it? As she switched on the light, she spotted the abandoned nipple clamps, framed by roses in the center of Brenda’s floral-print scatter rug. Exhausted and more than a bit overwhelmed, she rested her face in her hands and laughed.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Her hair still dripping from the shower, Val tugged on shorts and a T-shirt and headed for the kitchen. She’d considered slipping back into the blue silk robe. But apparently, adding nipple clamps to her list of sexual experiences didn’t abolish her inhibitions about walking half-naked around the apartment.

  “Yes!” Brenda hadn’t neglected the ice cream aisle the last time she went grocery shopping. Anticipating the pure bliss of ice cream and afterglow, Val pulled the container of Cherry Garcia from the freezer and sat at the table with her feet tucked up under her legs.

  The only thing that would make this moment more perfect would be having Ian here with her. She wondered if he’d let her spoon ice cream into his mouth. She had a hunch he’d like it, especially if she blindfolded him.

  Okay, if she was going to get any sleep tonight, she needed to shift her thoughts to tamer ground. Like the phone interview she’d scheduled for tomorrow afternoon.

  With a groan, she laid her head in her hands. The interview ‑‑ for a position in San Diego ‑‑ was the second one with a California employer. And she couldn’t get much farther from Gulls’ Harbor than California. Damn, damn, damn. Should she call and cancel?

  No. She’d gone that route once before, and the decision left her burned-out and hating her job. But still, she’d never wanted anyone the way she wanted Ian, never loved anyone half as much as she loved him. If there were fairy godmothers, one would swoop down right about now, wave her wand, and conjure up a job working with troubled teens right here in Gulls’ Harbor.

  Okay, that was spooky. Reacting to the sudden feeling that someone was watching her, she lifted her head and glanced around the room.

  “Cripes! I ought to put a bell around your neck!” Was this Kevin’s idea of a joke? A little ghostly humor?

  “Sorry, buddy, you’re the sorriest” ‑‑ or sexiest ‑‑ “looking fairy godmother I’ve ever seen.”

  Kev leaned back against the sink, his running shorts and yellow T-shirt displaying hefty muscles to their best advantage. It unnerved her to see Ian’s sea green eyes staring at her from another face, but the mop of sandy brown curls gave Kev a look all his own. A look he liked, evidently, since though he varied the colors of his wardrobe, he seemed to favor clingy shorts paired with a skintight tee.

  “Okay, fairy godmother you’re not, but you look damn good for a dead guy.”

  So why had he materialized fully? She’d only seen him do that a handful of times, and only when he seemed to have something important on his mind. Like when she’d catapulted into him in Ian’s hallway that morning Kevin had “introduced” himself. That time, he’d left her with the hint of a thought, his only message to her thus far. Don’t hurt Ian.

  Which was what she’d been thinking about doing. Never mind the fact that relocating to California would tear her apart as much as it would him. It would definitely count as hurting Ian.

  “Is that why you’re here? To tell me to stay?”

  Good, Val. Try and play twenty questions with a non-communicative spirit.

  “Did you hear that?” Already jittery, she about jumped out of her skin at the crash downstairs.

  Maybe she was imagining things. It was close to midnight. She’d had an intense experience earlier, and she was overwrought at the thought of leaving Ian if she landed a job across country.

  Nope. Kevin had heard it too. He pointed to the open windows, then the phone. And then he was gone. No glimmer, no fading, just gone.

  “Shit.” Trying to prioritize, she rushed to make sure the apartment door was locked and then ran around, closing and locking windows.

  Out of breath, Val grabbed her cell phone and called 911. By the time she’d given Brenda’s address and explained that someone had broken into the shop downstairs, the noises from below grew louder.

  Lacking any obvious weapons, she grabbed a tennis racket and locked herself in the bathroom. How goddamned long did it take the police to drive across a town as small as Gulls’ Harbor? She clutched her phone, resisting the urge to call Ian. Hearing his voice might make her feel better, but there was no point scaring the hell out of him when he was in Boston and she was here.

  Val jolted upright at the bloodcurdling scream, almost pitching backward into the tub. Next she heard the sound of shattering glass, then silence. Shaking, she crouched down in the corner ‑‑ and nearly peed her pants when Kevin materialized near the sink.

  “Crap! You need to find a subtle way to announce your arrival. You know, rattle a chain or something?”

  If ghosts could look sheepish, Kevin managed it. He held out his hand, and when she placed her palm against his, the presence felt reassuring. Not quite like touching a human hand, but firm enough to let her know he was here with her.

  “You scared him away?”

  Kevin nodded.

  Hell, she’d seen what he could do when angry. She didn’t want to dwell on what intimidation tactics he might use to frighten away burglars.

  Not that he’d need to try hard. He was a big guy, not quite as tall as Ian, but broader across the shoulders. And even if he’d been five feet four and skinny, having a ghost appear out of thin air would be enough to frighten off all but the most determined of thieves.

  As she registered the sound of sirens in the distance, she picked up her phone, grateful that Ian had entered their friends’ numbers into her directory.

  “Hey, Nathan, did I wake you?”

  “Val? Everything okay? And no, I wasn’t sleeping.”

  “Yeah, I’m okay. Someone broke in
downstairs, though. Kevin scared the guy away, and the police will be here soon. But I don’t want to stay here tonight. Brenda’s away visiting her family.”

  “Jesus, doesn’t Brenda have a security system for the shop? You’re sure you’re all right?”

  “Yeah, I’m fine. Just sort of shaky. And yes, she does, a good one, actually. This guy must have known what he was doing to get past it without setting it off.” The thought that there’d been a pro down there, rather than kids out to make a quick buck, made her shiver.

  “I’ll be there in about twenty minutes.”

  Sure, if he broke a few land speed records on the way. “Honestly, Nathan, there’s no rush. I can drive over there after the police leave. I just wanted to make sure you were home.”

  Was it her imagination, or did Kevin roll his eyes at her? She listened to muffled voices in the background, as if Nathan had covered the phone with his hand.

  “Still there?”

  “Yep, just me and the ghost, hanging out in the bathroom together. Although the police just pulled up outside, so I think Kevin’s going to have to scoot soon.”

  “I’m getting into the car, so stay put. I’ll be there before the police are finished taking notes. No way am I going to let you navigate a maze of unlit rural roads after what you’ve been through tonight.”

  She stifled a laugh. What she’d been through tonight? He didn’t know the half of it. “Thanks, Nathan. The police are pounding on the door downstairs, so I’ve got to go let them in. Drive carefully, okay?”

  “See you soon.”

  Val missed the reassuring sound of his voice as soon as he disconnected, but at least Kevin seemed intent on escorting her down the dimly lit stairway to the outside door.

  “Thanks, Kev. I owe you one for looking out for me tonight.” At the bottom of the stairs, he touched her shoulder and disappeared.

  “Hi, come on in.” She opened the door and beckoned for the portly gray-haired officer to enter.

  The officer looked more like someone’s grandmother than a gun-toting law enforcement agent, but she was both friendly and efficient as she examined the locks, followed Val upstairs, and asked what seemed like a million questions. By the time the officer’s partner joined them, Val was struggling to keep her eyes open. Between her long-distance romp with Ian and the stress of the break-in, she could almost fall asleep on her feet.