Illusions of Grandeur and Other Stories

by TS Gwilliam

  “Oh, oh, I can’t take it anymore,” wailed Stripy “when will it end, surely I’ve earned the Wicker, I’m so tired, all I want is to move on.”

  “There there, it will come soon enough; we are all here for you, you know, please don’t cry, hey what do you call a pen full of holes? ........Pensive!.. there we go hasn’t that cheered you up?”

  (Dear Reader, please note that Pen jokes are in a world of their own, it would take far too long to explain what makes a Pen laugh as not all Pens have a sense of humour.)

  “Mmm yes, I think I’ll just go over there and be by myself. Thank you.” said Stripy sloping off back to his corner.

  “Did you see those nails? Wow I’ve never seen a red like that before.”

  “It was a stunning colour.”

  They were all chatting away, discussing how it was obvious it was that it was a Red that was chosen, when they heard a groaning noise, getting louder and louder.

  “Will you please stop your chattering you are giving me a headache!!” screamed the Sleek One

  “Do you know…. I don’t think I know who I am anymore! Where am I? How did I get here?”

  The Pen Box fell silent.

  It was quiet for a few moments; all the Pens didn’t quite know how to react as they had never heard a Pen shout like that before. The Sleek One stood there tall and proud, at last all the loud babbling had stopped. He then noticed that they were all whispering, he couldn’t quite make out what they were saying. He strained a little to try and hear what was being said but still couldn’t make it out. This was not helping his headache. At last he gave in.

  “Okay, what are you all saying?”

  A hush fell over the Pen Box.

  “Well, is someone going to speak up?”

  After a few moments, someone was brave enough to come forward.

  “Je suis Lulu?”

  The Sleek One glared at her. Then surprisingly the Green stepped in again.

  “Rhubarb.” he said.

  “What?” said the Sleek One, still glaring.

  “Rhubarb, Rhubarb, Rhubarb.”

  “Okay, why are you saying Rhubarb?”

  “Because we don’t know what else to say and that’s what Pens say when they are talking in the background but no one actually has anything to say” The Green continued in an authorative tone.

  “I do believe the Hands have adopted the idea because I have seen and heard them on that Big Black Box in the corner!”

  “Oh, what utter nonsense this is!” exclaimed the Sleek One.

  “Well you did ask. If you don’t want to hear the answer, don’t ask the question.” stated the Green and then turned to the others.

  “Rhubarb.” he said nodding in the Sleek One’s direction.

  “Rhubarb!”

  “Rhubarb.”

  “Rhubarb???”

  It was at this point, luckily or not for the Sleek One that the Chubby Hand came running into the room. There was a gasp in the Pen Box as he came closer and leaned over the box.

  “Ahh, look. There you are. My daddy thought he had lost you.”

  He was looking directly at the Sleek One.

  “But I knew where you were. I’ve been playing with your friends but I can’t play properly, my dad says, unless there are three of you.”

  He leaned forward and the Sleek One could feel his breath breezing over him and although he wouldn’t admit it in front of the others, he was a little nervous. He could see the Chubby Hand moving closer to him as if in slow motion. What was that in his hand? It looked like he had those feather things that Lulu had on her head but not quite so fluffy. The Chubby Hand grasped the Sleek One and held him tight. He was trying to put the feathers in the Sleek Ones head!

  “Whoa, Whoa.” the Sleek One muttered under his breath and then a little louder.

  “Ahh…careful…Careful!”

  The Chubby Hand finished putting the feathers in and stood back to admire his work.

  “Yes, now daddy will be pleased. He can show me how to play properly.” and off he went skipping happily out of the room after standing the Sleek One back in the Pen Box.

  “What on earth happened there?” asked one of the Blues.

  All the Pens were now staring at him.

  “You do look odd.” someone piped up.

  “Thank you.” said the Sleek One It was a strange feeling but the feathers in his head felt as if they belonged. The others started murmuring between themselves, throwing the odd glance in his direction.

  “Well, you know me,” one of the Reds was whispering “I don’t like to say anything about anyone but, I don’t think...no…..he’s not a Pen!”

  “What is he then?”

  “I don’t know, OMG! I’ve just noticed. Look, look! He hasn’t got a proper nib!”

  “How can he write then?”

  By now all the Pens were huddled in a corner of the Pen Box. The Sleek One was confused.

  “I have the strangest feeling that I don’t belong here.” he said half to himself, half to the others.

  “You could be right there,” said a Blue “What are you? Don’t you know?”

  A hush fell once more upon the Pen Box. It was broken by the entrance of the Big One being pulled along by the Chubby Hand.

  “Look daddy, look what I found,” he said excitedly “there in the Pen Box.”

  Daddy peered in.

  Well done son.” he said smiling as he picked the Sleek One up, turning him around in his hand.

  “Come on then. Let’s go and play. It’s been a while since I had a game of Darts. I used to be the Pub Champion you know.”

  The conversation drifted away from the Pen Box as father and son left the room, with the Sleek one

  “Let’s get the three of you together again.”

  After a few moments of stillness and the Pens all looking at each other, a surprised voice said

  “What was that all about? A Dart? What’s a Dart?”

  They all looked at each other bemused.

  “At least he got to leave the Pen Box and go on to a better place.” moaned Stripy. He turned to Lulu.

  “Hey Lulu, can I have one of your feathers?”

  Archers Meadow.

  The sun glistened off the windows of the old house as Sophie walked up the overgrown garden path. The past few years had been tough for her, she had worked hard for over fifteen years at the Bank and Redundancy had hit her hard especially as it came hot on the heels of her painful divorce. “But” Sophie sighed “now it was time for a new beginning” and this house and her new freedom was the start that she needed.

  As she opened the creaky door the musty smell of ‘times past’ tickled her nose, then when she stepped in she had the feeling that somehow she had “come home” that she belonged here. The strength of this emotion momentarily struck her as strange as she had never been to this part of the Country before. She had fallen in love with the house as soon as she saw the photograph on the Internet. Set in two acres of land within half a mile of the Mansion House and five miles from the Village it was isolated enough for Sophie to revitalize her tired self, but close enough to other people for her to feel safe. They had seemed quite friendly in the Village shop when she popped in on the way here, not at all like the stereotype she had imagined. Mrs. Wilcox the Postmistress had been quite keen to tell her about local events at the Church and Community Centre, inviting her to come along so she could be introduced to other residents.

  She walked through to the kitchen, putting her shopping on the dusty table; she checked the fridge, which was fortunately working. A tour of the house found everything in order except for the dust.

  ‘That won’t take long to fix.’ Sophie thought she’d soon have the place spick and span. A cup of tea made and a packet of biscuits to hand she wandered into the back garden. It was beautiful, unkempt, the same as the front garden, but it had character. This was the type of garden that she liked, a little on the wild side but colourful and peaceful. As she stood sipping
her tea she looked out over landscape. In the distance she could see the grassy hill that dominated this part of the land, the Mansion House she knew was on the other side, it now lay deserted and decaying but according to Mrs. Wilcox that was a story for another day with tea and cake.

  Sophie paused soaking up the last of the suns rays letting her mind relax. After a short while, she caught sight of a rider on a horse racing to the top of the hill where suddenly they stopped and faced her direction. Sophie shielded her eyes, squinting to see if she could make out any form but all she could see was a black horse with a rider, who as far as she could see was dressed completely in black. The rider sat there for a few minutes. It seemed to Sophie that he or she was staring straight at her, she felt a chill on her spine, but then they spun round and rode off at speed. “Somebody’s found out there’s someone new around here” she murmured as she turned back to the house.

  “A bite to eat, then out with the duster and hoover. That’s the agenda for tonight.” she said to herself.

  Sophie opened her eyes to the daylight seeping through her bedroom curtains; she got up and stretched feeling refreshed after a good nights sleep. She had worked hard the previous evening and fell asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow. ‘What should she do today?’ she wondered as she ate her hearty breakfast, a treat of bacon, eggs and fried bread. A guilty pleasure she knew, but that morning it tasted particularly good. Sophie decided that a little exploration of her new territory would be the order of the day, especially on foot where she could really get to see her surroundings.

  It really was a beautiful morning as Sophie set off, wearing her sensible walking shoes and carrying a lightweight raincoat ‘always prepared’. She strolled down the lane that led to her house and chose to see where her feet would take her. Following the lanes turning right and left as her fancy took her, she walked for about two hours taking in the scenery, going past the periodic pretty little cottage and seeing the occasional person who waved or nodded as they went past. She was beginning to feel tired and her thoughts turned to sitting a while and eating her sandwiches. Sophie looked around her immediate surroundings for somewhere to sit in the shade; the sun was getting hot now. It was at this moment that she spotted the big iron gates that were open and as she got closer she saw the name ‘Archers Meadow’ inscribed in the framework. She recalled that this was the name of the old Mansion House. ‘Surely I haven’t walked that far?’ she pondered as she moved towards the gates and began to stroll up the wide, tree lined drive.

  The roadway was mostly straight with intermittent twists and turns leading eventually to an open area where the Mansion stood tall and imposing. Looking tired and uncared for with most of its windows broken or cracked, the vines and ivy strewn across its walls as if enveloping its prey. To the right was an old gnarled Yew tree. Sophie stopped for a while, staring at the house, caught up in its gothic mystery. As she stood there in the peaceful moment the warm breeze brought the gentle whisper of a waltz to her ears. Drinking in the sound, she found herself gently swaying to the echo, lost momentarily until something flashed in the corner of her eye, bringing her back to reality, which wasn’t where she left it.

  The sky was dark and menacing; the breeze was still warm but appeared to lack air. As she tried to catch her breath, a ‘flash’ sped past the corner of her eye. Spinning round, now gasping, Sophie saw the rider on the horse across an open patch of lawn, standing as before. This time a little closer, she could tell it was a man but other than that she could make out no discernable features. In what seemed like an age Sophie and the rider observed each other neither moving until the flicker of red next to the Yew tree broke the moment. Then he was gone and the sunny day returned in an instant.

  Stunned, Sophie waited, her mind confused. What on earth had just happened? Thoughts were now whirring around her head. After managing to catch her breath and regain her senses Sophie began to walk towards the Yew, if she wasn’t dreaming maybe the red flicker would mean something. The grass was long around the tree and it took a while for her to see the red glimmer in the undergrowth, gingerly pushing her hand between the blades of grass she reached down and picked up the object. As she held it in her hand the ruby appeared to glow and held her gaze with a comforting sensation. It knows me she thought, “Hallo You.” she said to it.

  “Come home with me.”

  It had been two months since Sophie’s experience at the Mansion; she had made it home, how, she had no recollection. Since then, although it had been a frightening encounter, the Ruby had distracted her and it seemed to Sophie that the whole episode had the scent of a path that she was meant to follow. The strange dreams had now subsided but she had an instinct that there was more to come. What it could possibly be, she had no idea. She had gone to the Summer Fair and politely attended a Wedding and Christening in the Village but had spent most of her time redecorating and pottering around in her garden with a passion she didn’t know she had.

  The ruby she had taken to Emily Drew, a woman who lived in the village and designed her own jewellery; she had explained it as a family heirloom, telling the small white lie that her grandmother had left it to her, a gift that her great grandfather had brought back from India. It was now moving towards autumn, the nights were drawing in and a chill was felt in the air, the trees were beginning to turn red, gold and brown, Sophie felt the colours warming her heart; it had been a long time since she had been so content and at ease with life.

  She had commissioned the stone to be made into a plain drop necklace wanting the beauty of the gem to dominate and not for it to be lost in the design and as today was the day she was due to collect it she felt the excitement rising as she entered Emily’s shop. Emily smiled and drew a box from under her counter and was obviously pleased with her efforts as she showed Sophie her creation, it was as planned, a simple necklace. The plain chain and a delicate interwoven clasp that held the ruby in place, it gently glowed as Sophie gently picked it up and held it in her hand. Emily invited her to have lunch with her. The conversation moved towards the Mansion House.

  “It had an exciting history” Emily told her, but Sophie wasn’t really listening. She wanted to get home with her jewel. With ‘half an ear’ she heard Emily tell her about a romantic episode that had happened around a hundred and seventy years ago, the story of a tragic love affair between the Earl’s oldest son and a local tenant’s daughter.

  Their love was doomed from the start; they tried to elope but had failed. He was sent abroad, only returning in later life with the ruby intending to give it to the love of his life, unmarried and lonely. The girl had died young, of a broken heart. Sophie nodded and passed the occasional comment itching get out of the shop as quickly as possible without being noticeably rude to Emily.

  Back at home in her kitchen, she picked up the necklace and carefully put it on. Immediately the energy and vibrancy of the stone spread through her body, she began to feel heady and felt herself drift away into a place that was unknown but did not scare her. There was the smell of freshly baked bread and the sounds of a family laughing and talking, she looked around and saw a man and woman and four children sitting around her, the woman was handing around plates of soup and there was a lot of chattering although she couldn’t make out what was being said, a plate was passed to her which she took and set on the table. She felt herself joining in with the conversation, laughing at the antics of one of the children and eating the soup, which was the best she had ever tasted. Then the last of the suns rays that were striking the windows suddenly disappeared as a shadow passed over them, she heard the whinny of a horse and ran towards the back door. It was stiff but she managed to grapple it open.

  There he was, at the bottom of her back garden. At this distance the horse was huge and stamping excitedly, but the rider sat astride it with ease and confidence and in full control, he was still dressed from head to toe in black and Sophie stepped forward, trying to speak but her dry mouth could make no sound. She couldn’t see his face and
realised as she got closer that his shape was, just an empty black void that drew her to it, the ruby glowed and pulsated on her chest, she felt herself being pulled closer. The horse suddenly reared up on its hind legs, but the rider kept his focus on her. Feeling only the loud beating of her heart Sophie had the urge to resist but the force was too strong for her. The rider, the horse, the red, gold and brown of trees began to swirl and she felt herself drawn in, her body was pulled and twisted as if in a violent eddy. There was no escape.

  She became aware of sounds, as if in a dream, her head light and hazy, her body felt heavy and weighted down. It was like one of those horrific nightmares when you are frozen, unable to move with the urge to run, but fear holds you like a glove.

  She slowly opened her eyes and began to see that she was in a large room, with heavy red wallpaper, long drapes and formal furniture. There was heaviness in the atmosphere as she tried to pull herself up. She listened.

  The music she had heard at the Mansion House when she had found the ruby, drifted towards her ears and she gradually got to her feet. When she noticed the sound of footsteps coming closer from the other side of the heavy closed door, her heart began to beat faster and it was then that she felt a pulse, drum through her body. It was coming from the ruby. The footsteps stopped outside the door. The music ceased. There were no sounds now, no movement, and no air.

  Then from under the door an orb floated into the room, it flickered and pranced softly holding her gaze. As it danced towards her, the ruby began to pulsate again but in a melodious and gentle way, it was as if they were communicating with each other, Sophie was the outsider in this interaction. As they got closer, the red of the ruby flowed into the whiteness of the orb the colours entwined each other, gently caressing as if meeting a lover. As they met the orb grew larger, growing and swirling into a mass that became larger than Sophie herself eventually surrounding her in the most beautiful rose aura. She became lost, forgetting completely where she was and all fear was gone.