by Alex Tempera
“Of course,” he smiled as he wiped his chin with the napkin.
“Have you ever been in love?” I don’t even know why I asked but I was curious.
“Yeah,” he snickered. “It was fifth grade and I loved her pigtails. I used to like pulling them and watching the curls spring back.”
I laughed. All I kept thinking about was my childhood addiction to the Ramona the Pest books by Beverly Cleary and how Ramona would love to pull the curls of her rival Susan. “That’s it? What was her name?”
“I think it was Daphne.”
“Oh, and after young Daphne?”
“No, the truth is I dated a lot, in High school, but never was serious.”
“When did you know or when did you become a submissive?”
“I was about 21. A buddy of mine took me to an underground club; he thought I’d be a perfect Dom. After going to the club for a while, I started being officially trained as a Master. After a few weeks, I realized I wanted to be on the other side. I talked to the trainer and he offered to train me as a sub to see which one or if even both fit me. I realized I liked being a sub.”
“How many Mistresses have you had?”
“You’d be the first true Mistress.”
“Oh, but you were a sub before me, right?”
“Yes, but only to learn different aspects and techniques.”
“Did you learn a lot?”
“Yes, I learned what I liked and didn’t like. I didn’t realize, though, that a Mistress could have more than one sub. I guess I was surprised that you had three. You had female subs before?”
“Yes, six,” I explained. “I’m what I consider heteroflexible. I don’t mind having a female sub. I usually trained them and sometimes, they move on to other females or other males.”
“You helped your friend Mae?”
“Yes, but I didn’t know he was abusing her. She never said a word. I just wish she told me.”
“She was probably ashamed and embarrassed.”
“Yeah, I know, but I’m her best friend. Her mother couldn’t even think of coming to the states to see her. She could’ve died.” I wiped my eyes.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “Angelica, I like being your sub but I think that we can become something great as a couple. I’d never ask you to drop the other two subs. I like being your sub, but I’d like for us to be a great couple. I know we’ve only known each other a real short time, but I feel like …” he stopped.
“What?”
“Would you go on a date with me?” he smiled.
“We agreed we would date.”
“Yes, and I want us to date. I want to do something special. I know you invited us Friday for the Club Twine event, but I’d like to do something special for you. Plan a great evening.”
“All right, when?” I smiled.
“Saturday? It is my night, but instead of just showing up to play, I’d like for us to go on a date.”
“I’d like that,” I smiled.
“You said I could stay, is that offer still valid?”
“Yes,” I smiled. “Lox?”
“Yeah?”
“Where the hell did you get your name?”
“My pappoús, um, grandfather,” He smiled. “My yiayiá, um, grandmother called him Lox.”
“Loxias, I think it’s a beautiful name. You’re a very unique man, Lox.”
“I try,” his dark eyes smiled.
“You’re a great man. Lox, I’d be glad to be half of a couple with you.”
He pressed his lips against mine. “I’m tired but I’d like to hold you. Mistress, may I hold you naked tonight?”
“You better, panther,” I growled into almost a flirt. I was falling for this man but I had no idea what the hell it meant.
20
I FEEL LIKE the world is closing in on me. I’ve been looking back at the past few weeks. My world has changed. My life has changed. Lox entered my life and everything else seemed to fall in to place, but I wasn’t sure what I’m supposed to do. My subs were falling for each other and then begging me to still be Mine. Lox wanted to date me and it was nice.
Lox and I went on several dates and I was still keeping him at a distance. He was close to my body, but I was afraid to let him in my heart. I know he had feelings for me but I was afraid I’d disappoint him. I’ve been independent and alone since I moved out of Mae’s loft. My life was about my business. I even built my own home in the same building as my company. How controlling and strange is that?
I tapped my gold pen on my desk as Elaine walked into the room. I don’t know how long it’s been since I took my subs to the event at the club. It was fun and interesting but it still lingered in my head about what I did to that bastard. Richard never spoke of that incident since that night. Alec and Dane told me there was nothing to worry about. But I worried. Not for getting into trouble but the fact that I lost control.
“Ms. Ralston?”
“Oh, Elaine, I’m sorry. What is it?”
“Mr. Panagakos just called. He said he’s on his way to the airport. He has to go to Greece.”
“Oh, sure, OK, thanks,” I sighed heavily. “Was that all he said?”
“He said he was letting you know as a business courtesy, whatever the hell that meant.” Elaine put a pile of folders on my desk. “Ms. Ralston, are you all right?”
“I guess I just forgot he was leaving,” I sighed.
Elaine nodded slightly and left the room.
I stood up and walked over to the window. I didn’t forget. He didn’t tell me. I knew after last night that something wasn’t right.
I woke up to see Lox sitting on the edge of the bed. I covered myself up with the sheet and sat up. “Lox?”
“I can’t do this with you anymore,” he sighed.
“Oh, do what? The sex or be my sub?”
He turned and looked at me. “Both. I’m no good for you and you deserve better.” He kissed my forehead and left the room.
Before I could get up and grab my robe, I heard the elevator doors open and then close.
I stared at the elevator light, indicating it was going down.
I don’t know what happen. We played last night. We made love last night. He held me and almost said something but he stopped. I fell asleep in his arms and then, he left me. He walked out on me. I thought about not just being without a third sub, but I was without Lox. It’s a good thing that I didn’t give him my heart. I wiped my eyes and sat back down. I would not cry. I would not care that Lox walked out on me. I would not feel loss! Dammit. I would not feel his loss! I just didn’t know where that left our partnership. I didn’t know anything. Anymore. I hated not being in control.
The next three days I just worked and worked. I called Alec and Dane to see if there were any issues with partnership with Hercules Publications, but they said they didn’t know. They were trying to investigate the contract, but they kept hitting brick walls with even getting through to Greece. Dane recommended that they reroute all my accounts, to new accounts and even new banking. He set up new banking procedures for the company and even payroll.
I hung up with Dane and swung my chair around. I stared out the window at the building across the street. Renovations were supposed to have gone on the building, but nothing happened. I was a fool. I trusted Loxias Panagakos and he’s trying to take over my company. My livelihood and he did it by jumping into my playroom, and my personal bedroom.
Elaine hurried into the office. “Ms. Ralston, you better turn on the news.”
“What is it?”
She rushed over to my laptop and logged on to the CNN website.
“Elaine?”
“There’s been a shooting at Hercules Publications in Greece.”
“What?” my heart dropped. I just resigned myself that Hercules Publications was going to steal my company and now … a shooting.
I stared at the screen and watched as police tape surrounded the tall Hercules Publication building, while emergency crews and police
were running in and out of the building.
“It has been confirmed that at least seventeen staff members of the Hercules Publication company in Crete, Greece have been killed. Crete, the largest island in Greece is usually known for its remnants of brilliant civilizations, explore glorious beaches, and impressive mountains but now, is a focus of bloodshed and terrorism. Early yesterday morning, three gunmen entered the building wielding AK-47 submachine guns. They systematically shot their way through the 80 stories of the Hercules skyscraper. It’s been reported that yesterday at 8 AM in Greece, someone called one-one-two, which is the European equivalent to the U.S nine-one-one emergency system. The reports are still coming in and the identity of the dead have not been confirmed.”
I gasped and couldn’t speak. Holy shit. Is Lox dead? What the hell happened? The thoughts were racing through my head. I tried to keep my composure but I just couldn’t think straight. Lox could be dead. “Elaine, please leave.”
“What?”
“Get. Out. Please.” I couldn’t let her see my pain. Yes, my pain. Here I’m waiting for Lox’s face to be plastered across my computer as one of the dead and she’s … I looked around and she left, closing the door.
I don’t know how long I stared at the screen. CNN reporting more deaths from those who were injured at the hospital, but they still weren’t saying who was dead. It was probably hours but I couldn’t do anything but stare at the screen. I lost him. I don’t know if he was trying to steal my company or play me for a fool but if he was dead…
“The reports have been finalized. It has been reported that Mr. Panagakos was one of the dead,” her voice trailed off as it listed the names of the dead and they repeated the names, scrolling slowly on the ticker at the bottom of the screen. My eyes blurred and I couldn’t deal with it anymore. Lox was dead. I closed my laptop and grabbed my bag. I hurried out of my office. “Elaine, I’m going home.” I didn’t even stop; I just barreled down the hall, practically running. I pressed the button on the elevator quickly and repeatedly as if that made it come faster.
Tears threatened to pour out of my eyes but I couldn’t deal with it. I couldn’t let anyone see me cry. I was about to take the stairs but then the doors opened. I didn’t even see him when I stepped on the elevator. My eyes were blurred with my pain as the doors closed behind me. I leaned up against the wall and tried to catch my breath, swallowing it whole.
“Angelica,” his voice caught my attention.
I opened my eyes and he stood in front of me. “Lox?”
He just stared at me and pulled me into his arms. “Forgive me,” he whispered as he held me.
I barely remember him leading me into the penthouse but then, all of a sudden, I realized that Lox was here. He wasn’t dead. He left me. Yeah, he fucking left me and he was trying to take over my company. I stared into his dark onyx eyes. “You fucking bastard.” I slugged him so hard he fell to the floor.
21
LOX ROSE TO his feet quickly and followed me into the living room. I stormed out the sliding glass doors to the balcony. He followed. I felt him behind me. I couldn’t allow him to see my tears.
“Angelica, why’d you hit me?” his voice was low and sad.
“You left me. You left me. You’re trying to take my company. You made yourself my sub … you ingratiated yourself in my life.” I couldn’t face him. I couldn’t turn around. My eyes focused on the traffic on the street below. It seemed so far away.
“I didn’t try to steal your company.”
I figured he was lying. Why did he even come back here? I had so many questions swarming my head. Why the hell did I care that I thought he was dead? I turned around and glared into those beautiful onyx eyes. I tried to not let his presence affect me. “You’re so fucking lucky… that I never gave you my heart!” I spat it out like venom.
“You mean to say that you don’t love me?” his face drained into a great despair. I’d never seen despair before on someone’s face, but I just saw it now, and it was heart-wrenching. I didn’t care. He. Betrayed. Me.
“No, I do love you. See? NO. I do love you.” Wait. What the hell did I say? Did I deny loving him or did I say I did love him? He’s got me so goddamn flustered.
“You love me?” he whispered, with almost what sounded like relief in his voice.
“No. Of course I love you.” Wait. I didn’t deny it. I couldn’t deny it. Why? It’s not possible to love him. Is it?
He gazed in my eyes as he held my face and pressed his mouth to mine. “Angelica, I’d never hurt you.”
I backed away. “But you did. You hurt me.” I walked around him and into the living room. I had to sit down. My legs were shaking and this fucking man threw me off. Just when I had everything in control. Everything in my life was lined up so perfectly, he waltzes into my life, my playroom, my boardroom, my … bedroom.
Lox walked in and sat on the table in front of me. He took my hands in his. “I wasn’t trying to steal your company.”
“You better start explaining. I don’t forgive easily.” The anger and love I was feeling were fighting it out in my head and I didn’t know what I even felt anymore. I don’t know if I felt anything but exhaustion.
“The night I left, I left because my father sent me a text, when you were asleep.”
“You said you weren’t good enough for me and then you walked out. You acted like you didn’t love me and then, I turn on the news and someone shoots up your building, stating that Mr. Panagakos is dead.”
“My father,” he gulped. “Mamá made me leave the country for fear I’d be next. I wanted to help them, but there’s nothing I can do.”
“I’m sorry about your father, but why didn’t you just tell me you had to go to Greece? I would’ve come or at least … been here for you.”
“My father’s text said that Benito was forming a takeover. He was afraid it was going to affect my business dealings here in the states. That it would affect your business.”
“Benito? Who’s that?”
“The head of the Italia Publishing Company. Sonny Benito. He’s been after our company for years. He tried to get a traitor in our company.”
“And he did, didn’t he?”
Lox stood up and walked over to the sliding glass doors. “He got a hold of some records of businesses that we were going to merge or do business with. Your records weren’t part of this. At the time, you weren’t on our radar to merge or partner with.”
“So, tell me what happened?” I stood up and walked over to him.
“He bought out or took over five of the seven businesses, and the other two filed bankruptcy. He started putting more pressure on my father. My father was concerned that he had mob or terrorist ties, so he did a sweep of all employees, old and new. He found the traitor. A man in the IT department, hired last year. Anyway, my father texted me to let me know we were going with plan B.”
“What was that?”
“Well, that he’d separate Hercules publications from my corporation. You see, I told you my father didn’t retire but I came in the business. The company is really called, well on paper, it’s Hercules Athens Publications. We planned on separating the two, so Benito would focus on him and not me and my ventures.”
“So, he had someone shoot up the corporation?” I put my hand on his shoulder.
“Yes, but not before my father and I separated the business. I got there and we worked all night to get the two separated. No one, not even the employees knew about the separation. I went to my parent’s villa and he stayed at the office. He worked there for two days straight doing I have no idea what. Then we, my mother and I got word. She told me to go home. To come back here to the States. To Boston. So I did. I just stepped off the plane an hour ago and here I am.”
“I’m sorry. Are you in danger?”
“I don’t know. You see, now that my father is dead, the Hercules part of the company goes to me. Once the police clear the building, I’m having Andreas go through the stuff that my father was wo
rking on,” he touched my cheek.
“Andreas?”
“He my father’s personal assistant. He was fortunate that he was out of the office. I may have to go back to Greece but I live here. Angelica, I didn’t want you hurt and that’s why I left. I had to take care of this business. I won’t allow anyone to hurt your business or ruin all your hard work.”
“Lox, you could’ve told me the truth. You didn’t have to lie to me, unless it wasn’t a lie.”
“What?”
“That you didn’t want to be with me anymore.”
“I so want to be with you.”
“When I saw that there wasn’t any construction on the building across the street... When Alec and Dane couldn’t get any information on our contract, I thought you were using me. I’m sorry that I doubted you but you didn’t give me much of a choice.” I walked over to my chair and sat down.
Lox sighed. “Angelica, you said something on the balcony. Did you mean it?”
“What did I say?” At this point, I was so confused, I have no idea what I said. At this moment, I disconnected my head from my heart.
He kneeled in front of me and put his hands on my lap. “Angelica, do you love me?”
I took a deep breath and crossed my arms. “You walked out on me.”
“Angelica, will you take me back?”
“Back?” I raised an eyebrow.
“As your lover and your sub,” he said. “As your panther.”
“What about …”
“Business?”
“Yes, if we are partners, could Benito still come after you or me?”
“Do you want to dissolve our partnership?”
“No, but I have to cover my ass. I worked my butt off for this company and I’m not going to have some mafia fucking terrorist take it from me.”
“I won’t let him. I swear. We can dissolve our partnership but it may bring it to his attention more. He could focus on you.”
“Then, I’ll just have to fix his fucking wagon!”
“Um, what?”
“Oh, sorry, American term.” I have no idea where that came from, but I think I knew someone who could help me. I did have my own contacts and just always kept them in my back pocket for when there was a need to use them. “I just meant that I think I may have a way to keep him away from us.”