Fast Time

by Shey Stahl

  “My friend got it,” he replied, using the birthday boy as a shield from my dad. “He died from natural causes.”

  My dad grabbed onto Jack—who was red faced from laughing so hard—wasn’t sure he could breathe. Jack loved this kind of thing, the pranks, the teasing, anything where we were all laughing.

  “Sure he did,” Dad grumbled, dripping with water and took Jack with him as they went back to the pool.

  I was almost certain that cougar had really come from a zoo. And more than likely, it had been stolen.

  Rosa came around the side of the house, her gaze on the truck as she stood beside me. “Think Jameson would let me keep that thing? I’ve always wanted a pet.”

  Though Rosa wasn’t family, and barely considered a maid, over the years she had become part of our family, just like the guys with JAR Racing.

  Laughing, I put my arm around her. “I’m sure he won’t mind one bit.”

  Rosa stood beside me and basically told me I was cooking the hamburgers wrong then proceeded to practically punch me in the gut when Grandma showed up with Bill. “First a cougar and now Bill...fifty says Jameson gets arrested today.”

  Rosa achieved her hustling skills from the boys at JAR Racing. Always betting on something. “I’m not betting you anything,” I told her, flipping the burgers and removing the ones that were now burning. Rosa was right, I wasn’t cooking them right.

  Grandma was in Dad’s face immediately with Bill by her side. “You’re going to be nice today. Don’t be an asshole in front of everyone.”

  Dad crossed his arms over his chest, giving Bill the once over. “Just because it’s my grandson’s birthday.” And then he walked away, refusing to shake Bill’s hand.

  My eyes shot to Jonah who was standing next to Casten, watching them. I knew immediately what my son was about to ask him.

  Jonah looked over at Casten, his brows drawn together. “Is asshole a bad word?”

  He reached down and handed Jonah a baseball and his glove. “Not in this family.” Standing, he took him by the hand. “Now show me this curve ball you think you have.”

  I could say without hesitation, Casten was a great uncle. An asshole at times, but still, he was good to my boys.

  ABOUT THREE HOURS into the party, after we’d eaten, the presents were opened and we relaxed, Arie finally asked, “Where’d Rager go?”

  I looked over at her as I sat beside Lily on the patio, and then away, watching Casten and Easton play a game of baseball with the boys and Gray.

  “Home. He saw you in a bikini and left.” She didn’t say anything, but I had to say it because I was tired of seeing Rager getting hurt. I leaned forward, trying to be discrete about what I said next. “You do realize what it does to him when he sees you with E, right?”

  Arie swallowed hard, lifted her chin, and boldly met my gaze. “I’m not stupid, Axel.”

  Lily jumped up when she saw Jonah trip over Gray and smack his chin the concrete patio. Gray turned and glared at him, like how dare he trip over her. Immediately, he cried for his mom. I waited, hoping he was okay and noticed there was no blood. Lily scooped him up in her arms and winked at me, silently letting me know he was all right.

  “I know that.” I turned back to Arie. “But you’re torturing him.”

  She groaned, leaning back in her chair. “I’m sorry. I feel bad, but I want him in my life somehow.”

  “Why?”

  “I don’t even know why. I feel like if I don’t have him in my life, as a friend, or…well, I just feel this void.”

  “And what about E?”

  She had to think about that for a moment. “It’s the same thing.”

  Casten approached, soaking wet, having heard everything. “Move to Africa. You can marry two men that way.”

  Arie didn’t find amusement in that. She stood and shoved Casten back into the pool. He landed on Tommy, who’d been dive bombed for the second time today.

  I looked at Arie. “How would Casten of all people know that?”

  “He spends an obscene amount of time on Google.”

  THAT NIGHT, AS LILY and I walked around the backyard slowly cleaning up, the boys were still in the pool, all three of them, with Casten, Arie, Hayden and Easton. Most everyone had gone home but my brother and sister. Though they were usually hanging around.

  Lilly stopped beside me, her arms wrapping around my waist. “It’s hard to believe we have three of the best little boys.”

  I pulled her tightly against my side pressing my lips to her forehead. “I love you.”

  I knew from a very young age that I would eventually marry Lily. By the time I was a teenager, I was certain I would. I’d never had feelings for anyone like I did for her. To this day, I remember our proposal, vividly.

  We had been lying in bed, sleeping, and I’d fallen asleep with the ring in my hand.

  Her hand moved to mine, the one holding the ring and I panicked closing my fist tightly. I’d spent the entire night fretting over asking her that I forgot to put it away.

  Lily giggled softly. “I already saw it.”

  Still on my back, I threw my arm over my face and groaned, the velvet box smacking me in the face. “I’m such a fucking idiot.”

  “No you’re not.” She assured me straddling my hips. Leaning forward, her hands rested on either side of my head against the mattress. “It’s beautiful.”

  I reached up to stroke the side of her face. Her eyes closed and she leaned into my hand.

  I hesitated and then just went for it.

  Sitting up, I moved back against the headboard. Lily seemed to understand what I was going to do when I reached for her hand, holding it with my own.

  “I wanted this to be romantic and perfect.” I stared at her, stunned by her natural beauty in the morning. “I wanted it to be perfect, everything you are to me but I got so worked up over it...well...nervous.” I shrugged. “It didn’t work out like that.”

  She let out an adorable sigh. “Axel, just give me the ring.” She held out her hand.

  “I should say something though, right?”

  Lily rolled her eyes. “Yes, ask me!”

  “Lily Anne West—” she started giggling and her hand flew to her mouth to stop herself. “Are you going to let me finish?”

  “Yes.” She squeaked wrapping her arms around her knees pulling them against her chest.

  Laughing, I looked down at our hands again. “All right,” I inhaled with an embarrassingly shaky breath. “Lily Anne West...will you marry me?”

  Lily was quiet for a moment before tears streamed down her flushed cheeks. “Yes.” She whispered, launching forward into my arms. Wrapping them around her tightly, I buried my face into her neck breathing her in. “I love you.”

  Looking around us at our three amazing kids, it was crazy to think that it all started in the dusty pits at a dirt track. The same place we were now raising our family.

  My eyes flickered to Jack, his laughter ringing through air. He looked so happy having everyone here.

  After doing a cannonball, Jack jumped out of the pool and ran over to where his new helmet was sitting on the lounge chair. He took his towel beside it and appeared to wipe water from the shiny black and red design.

  Lily laughed. “Heaven forbid there be water drops on it.”

  I joined in her laughter, but I knew I was exactly the same way when I was a kid. Hugging Lily close, I kissed her head, gentle conversations and laughter all around us. It was a special day for Jack, and me. Spending time with my family and friends, Lily wrapped in my arms, came close to perfection.

  When Jack noticed us together, he ran over to us. “I made my wish.”

  Jack was always big on his birthday wish when he blew out the candles on his cake. I knew exactly what he’d wished for earlier. To go with me to the west coast.

  Teasingly, I placed my hand over his mouth. “Don’t tell us or it won’t come true.”

  Lily arched an eyebrow at him. “We’ll talk about it later.
”

  She knew, too. To be honest, I wanted him to come. After missing the race where he broke the track record, I kinda felt like I owed it to him.

  Lily and I watched him run back to the pool, screaming, “Cannonball!” as he jumped in. With a sigh, her head leaned into my shoulder. “He can go with you.” And then she groaned. “Ugh…I hate that our baby just turned seven.”

  Reaching forward, I pulled her shirt away from her chest to peek down the front of it. “We could go make another one.”

  “I’ll meet you upstairs in five minutes.”

  Lily

  Caution - A yellow flag condition, where no passing is allowed (unless ordered by officials for racing order) and cars must slow down.

  I ALWAYS BELIEVED that when you have a gut instinct, you should listen to it.

  I’d always been a person who was fairly intuitive to the world around me, generally knowing when something felt off. This time, I tried to push those feelings aside and ignore them, telling myself they were just my nerves.

  The morning Axel was set to leave for the west coast, I laid in bed with him not wanting to move. I wanted this one moment where I could forget that my husband was rarely in this bed with me and I wasn’t raising these kids by myself.

  Drawing in slow and steady breaths, my lips pressed to Axel’s bare shoulder. When he felt my touch, he twisted and rolled to the side and then on top of me.

  My hands went to his back as he hovered over me, smiling down with a sense of ownership and possessiveness. I’d never had eyes for anyone but Axel Riley. He knew that.

  “Is this what you want?” he asked, hitching my leg up around his waist, and then winked at me. “You said you wanted another one.”

  “Yes,” I hummed against his lips, my need for him seeming magnetic. “I do.”

  I wanted a little girl. Ever since Casten and Hayden had Gray, I wanted one. Though she was a handful, Gray was so freaking adorable with her brown curls and doe-like brown eyes.

  Stop. Your husband is having sex with you. Pay attention.

  Making myself focus, I wrapped my arms around him tighter, knowing that at any moment the boys would be up and our five minutes of freedom would be over.

  Axel knew that too and worked quickly. Quicker than I wanted him to or maybe it’d been too long for him because just as I was about there, he finished.

  “Fuck…” He groaned, barely breathing, barely moving as he held me tightly against him. “I’m sorry.”

  Laughing it off, I put my hands on his chest. “I guess that’s one way to make a baby.”

  WE TOOK OUR TIME packing that morning but still, something was off. I thought maybe it was because Jack would be with Axel and not me, but I was going with them so it didn’t make any sense.

  Then I thought, was I nervous about Axel racing? Every time he left, he assured me I had nothing to worry about. A part of me wanted to believe him, the other part knew I couldn’t.

  As I organized the boys, making sure they had the toys they wanted to play with on the long plane ride, I walked to the end of the hall into the trophy room to get the toy sprint cars Jonah left in there. Nothing was out of place, but the moment I walked inside the room, I noticed a photograph was on the floor. It was the one of Jack looking up at Axel after he won the Knoxville Nationals two years earlier.

  What threw me off about it was that was the same photograph Axel had been staring at when we were at the restaurant a few months back.

  Not thinking anything of it, or trying not to, I tossed the cars in my purse and met Axel in the driveway. He had all three boys loaded in the Expedition and ready to go.

  “Look at you,” I teased, getting in the car with him.

  Axel smiled, a playful grin tugging at the corners of his lips as he started the car. “I had some making up to do.”

  Reaching over, I patted his shoulder. “You did…now get me some coffee.”

  Jack perked up. “I want coffee, too.”

  Axel looked at him in the rearview mirror. “You don’t drink coffee.”

  “I do now that I’m seven.”

  Jack continued to talk in the backseat, Jonah stared out the window and Jacen cried because his granola bar had fallen to the ground. All that around me, I couldn’t shake the image of that photograph on the ground. I tried to shrug it off as inconsequential.

  “Mama, did you get my cars?” Jonah asked suddenly, his voice panicked that I would have forgot the toys he never leaves home without.

  I held them up. “Yes, honey, I got them.” And then I looked over at Axel who was concentrating on the road. For being a race car driver, he was a surprisingly cautious driver on city roads. “Did you knock that picture of you and Jack off the wall?”

  Axel turned his head to look at me. “What picture?”

  “The one of you and Jack at Knoxville Nationals.”

  “I did, Mommy,” Jonah confessed. “It was an accident, but I couldn’t reach to put it back.”

  Relief washed through me and I shook off my paranoia. I was never one to be superstitious and I refused to begin over a fallen photograph.

  Axel

  Pill draw – The process of drawing a pill to select their position for qualifying. The pills are drawn prior to the drivers meeting. If a team doesn’t draw a pill, they’re placed at the end of the qualifying order.

  RIGHT BEFORE SCHOOL started in September, and Jack was set to go into the second grade, we made the decision to let him come over to the west coast for the first few weeks of the tour. He’d then fly back home with Lily for the start of the school year while we hit the last two tracks in California, Chico and Antioch.

  Lily flew out with us, brought Jonah and Jacen with her, but spent some time visiting her Aunt with her parents in Crescent Beach. We agreed we’d meet at Cottage Grove a few days later.

  After the Monster Meltdown in Skagit, where I won both nights, Grays Harbor was rained out. That gave us an early jump on Cottage Grove but also left us in town with nothing to do.

  We were on our way to the hotel, or at least I thought we were, and I could barely keep my eyes open. Jack had fallen asleep, his head resting against his headrest, mouth open. Though it wasn’t even seven, we were exhausted.

  With Tommy, Willie, Casten, Rager, Lane, Jack and I in the Expedition we rented, our plan was to get dinner and then head to the hotel, but we realized there wasn’t a restaurant we could all agree on.

  We came up to a stop sign with a billboard alongside the road.

  “Hmmm…Callister wedding,” Willie read the billboard and looked over at Tommy behind the wheel. They exchanged a look.

  When you were on the road as much as we were, the boys were constantly looking for ways to entertain themselves. That became evident when we found ourselves outside the Callister wedding party.

  I took a deep breath and let it out slowly when I saw where we were. “What are we doing here?”

  Jack jumped up from his seat, wide-eyed and ready to party. “Is there food in there?”

  “They advertised it on the billboard. That’s their problem.” Tommy gave me that look. It was the one Tommy usually had when he felt like you weren’t making any sense. “And, it’s free beer.”

  “But it’s someone’s wedding,” I pointed out.

  “So?” Turning around in his seat, he looked at me as if I was crazy. “It’s free beer. Enough said, man.”

  “Is he really doing this?” I looked at Rager, then Casten when we stepped out of the Expedition.

  Rager shrugged, a smile tugging at his lips as we walked. “Have you ever known Tommy to one, lie, and two, pass up free beer and food?”

  I had a feeling this wasn’t the first time they’d crashed a wedding. Idiots thought they were Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson.

  “Well no, but guys,” I tried to reason with them, but knew I wasn’t getting anywhere, “we can’t barge in on their wedding. And we have Jack. Lily will kill me if she finds out...”

  “Who gives a fuck?” Tom
my ignored me. “They won’t. They’re getting married. Hundred bucks says they’re drunk, too.”

  “You’re on!” Willie announced then saw a bridesmaid. When she passed by him, he turned on his heel to walk backwards, watching her. “I’ll give her a wedding present. I’ll even gift wrap it.”

  Rager burst out laughing, his body hunched forward as he tried to walk straight.

  It was a disaster. Never let the JAR Racing boys into your wedding.

  Ever.

  Once we made it inside the wedding, they all pretty much went in different directions. I went for the beer, since they did have a keg and tried to keep an eye on Jack. Kid was quick at getting away from me in the crowds of people.

  He seemed to be the life of the party when he put on Tommy’s sunglasses and asked the flower girl to dance. I’ll admit, he looked pretty badass out there dancing around.

  “He’s comfortable.” Tommy laughed, sitting next to me. “Nothing like you at that age.”

  He was right. I was the type of kid who sat back and watched, never the center of the party. That was my brother. And Jack was a lot like him in some ways, wanting to make people laugh and have a good time.

  “See,” Tommy hit his cup against mine, “this is fun.”

  I only nodded. Never agree with Tommy. Ever.

  Casten made his way to the dance floor with Willie. Casten politely declined the invitation to dance with the maid of honor and instead, challenged my son to a dance off.

  Rager came over to the table we were sitting next to. “Uh, Willie is drinking absinthe straight from the bottle. I think it’d be a good time if we left soon.”

  “Who the hell gave him that?” Tommy sighed.

  Before we could get the bottle away from him, we heard horrified gasps coming from the table where the bride and groom were sitting. The same bride who let Willie have her garter.

  Willie was punched out by the groom and we were asked to leave at this point.