The Outer Edge of Heaven

by Hawkes, Jaclyn M.

  Charlie busted up laughing. "Holy brutal, Fo! A waitress? Oh my! You’re forgetting that theoretically there are some single, eligible men in law school." She turned to Luke. "See. You can't be an item when you're that painfully honest. A girlfriend would kill you."

  Luke smiled. "I guess I see what you mean."

  Chapter 4

  The funny thing was Charlie and Lindie were becoming truly good friends. Even though Lindie was nineteen and Charlie was twenty-three, their friendship came incredibly easy. Lindie must have understood that Charlie wasn't judgmental of her in the slightest because they hit it right off, in spite of Lindie's naturally quiet personality. One evening Charlie needed to go shopping and Fo had actually finally asked his nurse friend out, so Charlie called Lindie and together they took the Taco Rocket and headed into Kalispell.

  Lindie was soft spoken, but she had a nutty sense of humor and they laughed the whole time they looked through the mall there. They'd almost made it back to the ranch compound when the Taco Rocket began making the noise. Charlie tried to warn Lindie that they were going to end up walking, but even that cracked the two of them up and they laughed all the last mile of the gravel lane as they walked carrying their packages. Before turning off toward her house, Lindie told Charlie, "You should get Luke to look at your car. He can fix anything."

  The next day when the computer in the kitchen went on the fritz, Evie said the same thing to Charlie. And indeed, when Luke came in for dinner and she mentioned it to him, he had it working in no time before he headed back out for evening chores.

  Before riding lessons the next afternoon, Charlie took the Taco Rocket in search of a new helmet at the farm and ranch supply and ended up walking the last ways in again. She told Lindie what had happened during their lesson and the two of them laughed together again as they rode. Luke came in during the lesson and seemed pleased about the helmet, but he asked Charlie what was up with her car out on the gravel road. She told him, "Sometimes it stalls. It'll be fine again when I go get it this evening, don't worry." He simply looked at her and shook his head as he headed back out of the arena. She and Lindie laughed at him this time.

  Charlie finally got up the guts to ask Lindie when she and Luke were getting married. They were riding side by side around the arena watching the girls ride and Lindie looked at her and admitted, "Actually, I'm trying to talk him out of getting married, but he's pretty hard to convince." She glanced down at Jamie asleep on the horse in front of her. "We're not really in love with each other."

  She dropped her eyes self consciously. "I made some pretty stupid decisions a while back. One of them was to trust Chase. Please don't tell anyone, but this is Chase's baby not Luke's. Luke just felt like he needed to marry me to make up for Chase not staying with me. I appreciate what Luke is trying to do, but I think it might be a better idea to give the baby up for adoption rather than make Luke feel he has to marry me out of responsibility. Someday he may end up hating me for it.

  “I know that sounds cold hearted to give it up." She hesitated, "But honestly, I had a lot of hopes and dreams before this happened. And much as I do love Luke, I mean we've practically grown up together. Much as I love him, it's more like a brother than a husband. Does that make sense?"

  "It does. I know exactly what you mean. Fo and I are that way. And I don't think putting your baby up for adoption sounds cold hearted. I think it means you love your baby enough to want it to have a happy, stable home where the parents do love each other and the baby will be desperately wanted. As opposed to being an oops."

  She paused and then continued. "I think it's okay to have hopes and dreams for yourself Lindie. I've never been married, but I would imagine it's hard enough without trying to make a go of it without being in love. It's not truly any of my business, but if you feel strongly about it, you'd better keep trying to talk to Luke. His sense of duty is strong, but he also obviously cares a great deal for you."

  Lindie nodded. "He does. He's a wonderful man. The best. But he's also pretty stubborn when he thinks he's right."

  "I can only imagine. How come you don't wear an engagement ring?"

  "Oh, he tried to get me to go shopping with him several times, but I'm not really a ring kind of a girl. It would always be in my way. And it's not like it would symbolize some eternal, true love anyway."

  This last comment sounded almost bitter and it broke Charlie's heart. She reached over and patted Lindie's arm. "Hang in there. Everything will work out however it's supposed to, in the end.”

  ****

  Thinking back on that conversation that night as she laid down to go to sleep, Charlie decided she truly believed that. When the people involved were honestly trying to do their best, God had a way of ironing out the wrinkles. She tried to keep an objective point of view in spite of her lingering crush on Luke. She genuinely liked Lindie and wanted the best for both her and her baby. It was too bad Chase had so few scruples. And that Lindie hadn’t kept stronger morals and been wiser.

  ****

  Things had been going well at the Langstons, but that all seemed to come to a grinding halt one afternoon when Richard happened to be out of town at a bull auction. To start with, when Charlie and Madge were trying to figure out why the printer was caput, Evie cut Elsa's hair while at the same time Elsa cut Jamie's. They were all sitting in a row like a miniature assembly line. Evie had a lovely neat handful of two dark braids and Jamie looked as if he'd been caught in the lawn mower.

  That same day, Charlie wondered if she was smelling cigarette smoke on Tuckett. He had been spending a lot of time hanging around with the ranch hand that watched Charlie and gave her the creeps. She knew the ranch hand smoked. She hoped Tuckett had just been around the smoke and not actually smoking.

  And then Angela came in from the airport in a bad mood for some reason. Her bad mood escalated rapidly when she saw the new haircuts Charlie hadn't had time to remedy yet, and then from somewhere Angela produced a bottle of wine and she started drinking. Charlie was shocked and immediately took the four kids to the swimming pool to get them away from her and her influence. Charlie thought she had things relatively under control by the time Luke showed up a little later to join them. All three of the little ones started to squeal his name and even Tuckett said, "Hey, Luke."

  Charlie was just trying to discretely explain what was going on up at the house when a pretty blonde girl she had never seen before showed up. Luke didn't look very happy about her appearance, but he introduced her politely enough. "Charlie, this is our neighbor, Summer Harmon. Her dad is another rancher up the road and she comes sometimes and swims or uses the tennis courts. Summer, this is Charlie Evans from Connecticut. She's staying with us this summer and helping out with the kids for us before heading off to law school this fall."

  Summer had given Charlie a halfhearted smile and then turned abruptly away to begin to all but hang on Luke. She was so obviously here to see him that Charlie looked around, wondering how in the world this girl had known Luke was taking some down time with the kids and was in the pool for once. It was the only time he'd been here with them since Charlie had gotten here and she wondered if somehow the other girl had been spying on him. She gave that thought up because of the sheer distances here and then just for a second, wondered if Luke had invited her. Almost immediately she rejected that thought, knowing without a doubt he would never encourage another woman when he was engaged to Lindie.

  Charlie had no idea how Summer had known Luke was here, but Summer certainly wasn't wasting her time about nearly drooling all over him. She was hounding him so hard that Charlie wasn't the least bit surprised when he abruptly got out and went back to the bunkhouse, and then left again in his pickup truck. The fact that Summer wasn't far behind him in leaving came as little surprise.

  Once she was gone, Tuckett looked after her car heading down the gravel lane with disgust. "Poor Luke. She's like a blood sucking leech or something. Always stuck to him when she's around. It drives him crazy. He can't even t
ake an afternoon off for once."

  Charlie tried to look for the positive. "At least she didn't stay long."

  Tuckett laughed. "No. Not after Luke left. She's not in love with any of the rest of us, I guess. It’s too bad she doesn’t have a thing for Chase. He has all the time in the world to spend with her." He changed the subject. "Come on Charlie. I'll have you a cannon ball competition."

  For the next half hour they had a cannonball competition. Fo showed up in the middle of it and then won. It probably wasn't very fair because he was so much bigger than everyone else, but the little kids laughed and cheered for his gigantic splashes anyway.

  Eventually Charlie hauled them all out and up to the house for dinner, and then did her best to remedy the hair situation. When she was through, Evie and Elsa no longer looked like twins which was probably a good thing since they weren't. Evie still had her long, silken tresses but Elsa now sported a wispy, short pixie that was actually adorable and just fit her. Jamie was now the proud owner of a crew cut, and though Charlie was sad to see his little, endearing curls go, he could never be anything but darling. Charlie did the best she could under the circumstances and hoped Richard wasn't as upset as Angela when he got home.

  Once the little ones were safely down in bed asleep, Charlie left them with Madge and took Tuckett with her to go out with Fo and Luke on the bunkhouse porch to keep him away from Angela again. Her drinking had picked up steam. An hour later, Charlie heard her musical laugh and was horrified to realize Angela actually had a male friend with her in the swimming pool right here at Richard's own house. Luke and Fo realized the same thing at about that same second and the four of them abruptly picked up and went inside the bunkhouse.

  She was sure they'd all been hoping Tuckett hadn't seen what they'd seen, but she could tell from his expression that he had as well. Deciding to deal with it head on she said, "I'm sorry you have to deal with something like this at your own house, Tuck. Some people have zero respect or character. At least you can be aware that some people can't be trusted and can try to avoid this kind of thing in your own family when you grow up, huh?"

  In a voice full of disgust and sadness, he replied, "Yeah, I guess so. I don't know why Dad doesn't boot her. He ought to. I don't think he even really loves her anymore."

  Luke dropped a big hand to his shoulder. "He doesn't want to teach us that marriage is disposable is all, bud. He knows he's made a huge mistake. He just wants us to know that when you get married, you stay married."

  Bitterly, Tuckett looked up, "Yeah, I only hope he doesn't get some terrible disease from her because of all the other men." His answer about ripped Charlie's heart right out of her chest. What an awful thing for a fourteen year old kid to have to worry about. The worst of it was he was right. Richard probably was at risk for something like that.

  They ended up just keeping Tuckett out there and putting him to bed in one of the other bunks and then calling Madge to let her know that. Once he was asleep, Luke turned on the stereo low and came back to Charlie and Fo on the couch with a long, sad sigh. "Between Angela and Chase and Summer, this has been a long day."

  Charlie didn't know what Chase had pulled and she didn't want to, so instead of asking, she teased, "What you need Luke, is a screen writer. Look on the bright side. There's a lot of money in film. You could call it something about putting the fun in dysfunctional. So you might have an X rating, but it'd be riveting entertainment."

  "That's not very funny, Charlie."

  She laughed and said, "Oh, it was too! You have to admit that was one of my cleverest of the day. C'mon"

  Fo laughed at her and Luke finally cracked a smile and shook his head. He glanced over at Fo. "Has she always been this much of a nut?"

  "Or worse. You should have known her in that awkward, giggly training bra stage. She was awful!"

  Charlie elbowed him. "You're not supposed to use the words training bra in mixed company. Nice people don't do that. Not to mention that that is the all time hardest part of life in this universe. A fact that the entire male population doesn't even come close to understanding. It's not very fair."

  "Oh, quit whining. You survived beautifully and turned out gorgeous and brilliant. We guys had to survive way worse stuff. And we couldn't bawl about it like you could."

  "Hey, I didn't know bawling was allowed. Why didn't you tell me? It would have come in very handy sometimes." She was thoughtful for a minute. "What could be worse than a training bra anyway?"

  He chuckled. "We can only divulge that on threat of death."

  "Ah." She waved a hand. "I'm too tired tonight to threaten anyone." She got up and gave them both a high five as she went by. "I gotta go to bed. Watching infidelity is exhausting. See you guys in the morning." She stopped and put a gentle hand on Tuckett's head and whispered, "'Night Tuck.”

  ****

  The next day went better, thank heavens. Surprisingly, without even being asked, Chase helped out more while they were short handed from Richard’s absence. And Angela got up and left for the airport almost immediately, in spite of the fact that she was miserably hung over. Charlie was surprised, but she had to respect Angela for it.

  A few hours after she left, Richard got home. Charlie wondered all afternoon if she should try to talk to him about what happened. Finally, after dinner when Luke said he had a surprise for the three little ones and they all headed outside to see what it was, she pulled him aside. "Luke, should we tell your dad what went on here last night?"

  "I already did, but it's not like he doesn't know she's doing it. He was pretty crushed when I told him what Tuckett worries about. The only thing is if they get divorced he'd have to let the kids go with her sometimes and then he'd have no way of making sure they're okay. He said he'd talk to Tuckett about it."

  "Oh, good. It's none of my business, but I feel guilty hiding it from him. I saw her with another guy at the airport the very first night when I came in."

  He shook his head in disgust. "Man, nothing like breaking you right in. I'm surprised you even decided to stay after that. I think she's been this way from not long after they were married. Dad says she was raised that way."

  "Why did she even marry him?"

  Luke gave her a lopsided grin. “Some of us think he’s pretty loveable.”

  “He is. I’m sorry. But you know what I mean. Why get married and narrow the field?”

  “I think it had a lot to do with the fact that he's kind of well-to-do. She wanted a chunk of Montana real estate to her name."

  Charlie looked all around at the glorious mountains and valley, brilliant green in the late evening sunshine. Quietly, she said, "It is amazingly beautiful here. I can hardly blame her except that that's an awful reason to get married."

  "Not if you're a mercenary.”

  “If she’s that mercenary, he could offer her a tidy little sum to grant him irrevocable full custody.” She nodded at the three children skipping ahead. “It’s not like they’re her life’s passion.”

  “No. But he’d rather put up with Angela’s stunts than have them feel like they are disposable to their own mother, at least this young. He knows from wife number two what kind of scars a mom walking out can leave on a very small child. I’m sure he’ll dump her once they’re older and can understand better. Otherwise, he’d just be teaching them that her escapades are acceptable. As it is, I’m pretty sure she won’t be entertaining any more men in our own pool, or drink around here either. He threatened to cut off her funds.”

  “Good for him.”

  They caught up with the children and Luke asked, “Aren't you even going to ask where we're going?"

  "Nope. It doesn't matter. It's all joy."

  "There's a new litter of pigs."

  "Really? Cool! That’s a wonderful change of subject! Now I'm excited!"

  "Just plan to be careful. The mother would eat these guys if she could. Literally." He nodded at the children. "Don't ever let them come out here by themselves."

  "She truly
would? That's horrible!"

  He scooped Jamie up and lifted him to his shoulders. "The babies are cute, but pigs aren't pretty. They're big and mean and dangerous."

  She took both of the little girls by the hand as they entered the barn. The smell was every bit as big and mean as Luke claimed the mother pig was, but when they got a glimpse of the babies they forgot all about the pungent odor. Luke was right. The babies were adorable and Charlie could see why Charlotte had been so enamored in the movie.

  Luke tossed some feed into the trough and then leaned in and scooped up one of the babies. He handed it squealing to Charlie and then leaned in and snagged another one. They helped the little ones hold the piglets for several minutes and then put them back in and watched from outside the pen for a while longer. There were ten of them and they were fascinating as they rooted around their mother.

  Just like in Charlotte's Web, there was one that was smaller than the rest. Charlie looked up at Luke. "Will that little one be okay? Will it be able to compete with the others?"

  He hesitated. "We'll simply have to see. I can't do anything about it if it doesn't do well. There's no way I could take on an orphan piglet right now. Reality isn't like the cartoons, you know."

  "No. I suppose not. We'll have to pray for it, -that the momma will be able to take care of it just fine."

  He smiled down at her. "Pray away Charlie. God loves baby pigs."

  ****

  She ended up on her front porch rockers again that night with Fo and Luke. She wondered out loud why he never brought Lindie with him when they hung out like this. He was somewhat hesitant when he replied, "The baby makes her really tired. By this time of night she's pretty beat."

  Charlie decided to level with him. "Lindie told me the baby was Chase's."

  There was no hiding his bitterness when Luke replied into the dark, "Chase told her he'd always loved her. She trusted him and made some poor choices she'll have to live with forever now."