by M J Giani
“Hi, James, this is my friend Cole, Cole, this is my housemate James Winters.” James saw Cole’s look and mistook it for interest, and he got a closed expression. He didn’t want the blonde guy to think that just because he worked in a gay disco, it meant he was one.
“Winters? Are you related to Byron Winters?”
“You know my brother? What did you tell Cole about him?”
“Yeah, look Roy, you better go home.” Cole didn’t want to stand there and watch this man who reminded him of the person who made him suffer.
“Nope, I'm not going to leave here alone, and I think you need to relax as much as I do.” Roy grabbed his arm and led him inside the club. When Cole looked back, he saw that James was following him with his eyes, ignoring the people in line that were trying to draw his attention.
The music was loud, and wherever you looked, you saw almost naked sweaty bodies clinging to each other in such a way that Cole doubted if they were dancing or warming up for sex. He thought he would feel afraid or ashamed and that he would have to leave, but the environment he had left behind many years ago, was making his body vibrate with the anticipation. It had been years since he had felt the desire to engage with people, and above all, to feel a tall and manly body against his.
“Shall we dance?” As if sensing Cole’s energy, Roy took him by the arm and led him to the middle of the hot bodies that were on the dancefloor. The techno music helped Cole let himself go. He didn’t know how long he had been there, lost in the music, when Roy said he was going to get something to drink at the bar. Right after he left, Cole felt a large, warm body behind him, but he didn’t move, as somehow, it felt right.
“You don’t know what you do to me with just this t-shirt on.” Cole had a good idea, because he felt the hard cock pressed against his ass, but that wasn’t what made him feel tense and stop dancing. He turned around slowly, and he looked at the tall black man. At least, this time, he was looking at the 'right' brother.
“Byron.” He whispered.
“Hello, kitty.”
***
Byron had left Jason in his parents' home in order to clean the new space that he had bought to turn into his new office. The place was large, as it had two floors, which allowed Byron to renew the top floor and turn it into an apartment for him and Jason. After clearing almost everything at around midnight, he made a quick inspection, and he felt proud of himself. The space was very large, and although it was more suitable for an office, he was beginning to see where each room and bedroom would be. He liked the large windows that let daylight in, it would be the perfect place to raise his child.
He was going to get a towel to go take a shower, when his cellphone rang. He looked at the name and saw that it was his brother James. He took a deep breath, and coughed with the dust around him, and when he recovered, he answered.
“Hello, Bro!” Byron laughed, he was always happy when he spoke to one of his brothers. “How’re you doing, man?”
“Yes, everything’s fine!” Byron could hear the background noise, and he guessed his brother was calling from his work. “I think your Cole guy is here.” Byron straightened up, his heart pounding with excitement.
“My Cole? You are sure?” Byron was confused with that information. “Wait, how do you know it's my Cole?”
“Well, Roy's here tonight and he brought a colleague from the hospital with him, who happens to be called Cole Taylor.”
“De Vere.” Byron corrected him, whispering.
“What?” His brother sounded confused.
“Nothing, keep talking.”
“Yeah, yeah, well, he recognized my name when we were introduced.”
“Oh, my God. Okay, I'm on my way.” He was about to hang up when he remembered something important. “James, don’t let him get out of there.”
“Are you aware that, in some way, this could be considered a crime?”
“James, please!” Byron didn’t care that his brother heard him beg.
“Okay, okay, calm down, I won’t let your sweetheart out.”
“Thank you, brother, I owe you one.”
***
Byron must have passed all speed limits to get the club in just 30 minutes, all clean and fragrant. Once he arrived at the entrance, he saw a small line, stopped to greet his brother and he got in immediately, disregarding the whispers of discontent of those waiting. Inside the disco, the lights almost blinded him, but even in the midst of thesea ofpeople, he could see his man, his ray of light.
And that ray of light was in the middle of the dancefloor, with several men looking at him, as well as another young man who, Byron thought, was his new friend Roy. He was in a fit of jealousy and fury, eager for his man, his Cole, and without realizing it, he advanced towards Cole and stopped behind him. At first, he didn’t react to him: the smell of clean and perfume, which was like Cole himself, charmed him so much that he stopped there, just to enjoy it. Roy, who was dancing in front of Cole, saw him first, and looked at him in amazement.
He opened his mouth, perhaps to alert his friend, but Byron slowly shook his head, a classic sign for “don’t say anything", to which Roy obeyed. Byron bent down to smell Cole’s hair, and although it wasn’t common for him to take the first step, Cole grabbed his waist and leaned against him, not leaving any space between them. At some point, he thought he heard Cole’s soft whispering his name, but he couldn’t say if it was real or not.
“Byron.” Cole whispered, turning to face him. Excited as he hadn’t felt in a long time, with the music, Cole’s smell and especially, with the anticipation of what might happen that night, whispered in his ear:
“Hello, kitty.”
The sound was deafening inside the club, as the music had a savage beating that Cole could feel vibrating through his whole body, and yet, he could hear Byron’s words. He could also feel his hearbeat against his chest.
“What are you doing here? Are you alone? You know this is a gay disco, right?” The astonishment was clear in Cole's voice.
“Well, the fact that there are no women here is a strong indication of that. Oh, that and the men dancing almost naked on the dance floor as well.” Byron felt Cole moving away from him, so he reached out and grabbed him by the arm. He didn’t want him to go away, perhaps he never wanted to go as well.
“It was your brother who told you I was here, wasn’t it?”
“Yes. I wanted to talk to you, as he intended to look for you later, while I was settling myself with Jason in the new house.”
“Settling? Jason?” Cole was aware that he sounded like a parrot, but he couldn’t stop it. Finding Byron at a gay nightclub on the same day he had decided to move on with his life was more than he could endure. A frightening thought crossed his mind.
“And Anna? Did she come too?” Cole’s voice showed his worry. He looked around, as if he expected to see her appear behind Byron, and yelled "Boo!"
“Calm down, breathe! It seems you're going to hyperventilate.” Byron breathed deeply, in and out, as if showing Cole how to do it properly.
“No, Anna and I are separated. We already were, when you saw us the last time, but this times for good. I brought Jason with me and I’ve gotten a loft about fifteen minutes away from here.”
“That still doesn’t explain why you're here. What do you want from me? First you reject me, and then I moved back to my city, and now this?” He made a gesture towards the people around them. The noise from the music seemed to have increased dramatically, and Byron barely heard what Cole said.
“Let's get out of here to a quieter place.” He took Cole’s right arm so that he would follow him, but he found resistance and looked at the young man, feeling confused.
“What’s up?”
“I'm not going with you God knows where, just because you tell me to do it. I came to dance and relax, so you can go, if you want to.” Byron felt frustrated and angry. If he could at least let him explain...but if he thought he was going to give up so easily, he was mistaken.<
br />
“Okay, I'll be at the bar, and when you're done, we’ll leave together.”
13
Cole looked at the bar again. He was trying not to, but this was already the fifth or sixth time he did. Hedidn’t feel like dancing, and in fact, at that moment he was just standing, like a statue. What a way to ruin a good night!
“You can go.” Roy said “You know you want to do it, so you might as well have a drink. Do you want to go to the bar?” Cole looked again at the man sitting there, ignoring the twink who was trying to draw his attention and was failing miserably. He sighed.
“Come on. Sorry about that.” Cole told Roy, stretching his arm to comfort him. “I wanted to dance, and now we’re in the midst of my personal dramas.”
“I don’t mind, since you’ll tell me, later, everything you can about this, and you don’t leave anything out.” Roy rubbed his hands together, imitating a wicked character of a movie whatsoever. Cole laughed. He really missed that childish Kelly, but he was glad to that he was opening himself to others – ever since he had started his therapy sessions with Dr. Beverly, he felt better, more like himself, with his emotions in tune. He came close to Byron, who was speaking to that twink, and touched him on the shoulder.
“Ah, there you are!” Byron put his arm around Cole possessively, and he turned to the young man who was talking to him.
“Love, this is Peter...is it?” The boy nodded. “Yes, and Peter, this is my boyfriend Cole.” Cole didn’t correct him, and shook hands with the young guy who was suddenly looking unhappy. He was feeling sorry for him, since he apparently had tried to seduce Byron, who gave him the "boyfriend" card to get away with it.
“I need to talk to you, can we get out of here?” He asked. They needed to work things through, since he couldn’t live his life with Byron appearing out of the blue turning everything upside down.
“Nice to meet you!” Byron said to Peter and got up, following Cole outside. They got to the car and Cole had a feeling of déjà vu, as he was standing there in the parking lot with Byron outside a nightclub. They stopped outside his old car, and he turned to Byron.
“You can’t continue appearing whenever you want to. I would appreciate if you stopped doing that.” His voice was firm as he spoke.
“You're right.” Byron answered simply.
“And more...you’re sorry? Am I right?” Why, he didn’t expect this. He thought he was going to insist, or even grab him and kiss him, but agree with him? Never. Had he also given up? On one hand, it was what he had decided too, just a few minutes ago, but on the other hand, he felt his heart sinking. In his intimate, he wanted Byron to convince him that they had to be together, that he had found his reasons to fight for him. He felt a tear that wanted to fall and with much effort, he stopped it from falling.
“Glad you agree. I'm going back inside, Roy should...”
“Wait, Cole!” Byron took him by the arm and dragged him to the door, motioning Cole to open it. He didn’t think it was a good idea, since the last time they’d been in the car together, he had lost his mind, and then he ended up heartbroken again. He already thought about his love story like Carrie Bradshaw’s love stories "Cole and Byron Part I, II and III ', which didn’t make him confident enough that there was going to be be a happy ending.
“I’m only asking you to listen to me. Then, if you want to leave, I promise I’ll never look for you again.” Byron put his hand over his heart, as if giving weight to his words, and convinced of his sincerity, Cole opened the door and got into the car. When Byron closed the door on his side, Cole looked at his hands. Being alone with him for a conversation that would expose their souls was making him feel shy and awkward.
“You're right.” Byron started saying “We can’t go on like this. This won’t end well for either of us.” After that, he sighed and looked out the window. He saw a couple running to the car parked right next to his, holding hands. A relationship without complications.
“I don’t understand.” Cole finally said, looking at the couple. “Is this the end?” Byron looked at Cole, feeling more determined. He had one last chance and he couldn’t fail.
“Would you mind if I took you to a place?”
“Now?” The man must be mad, he wasn’t anybody’s chauffeur. Byron was already foreseeing that his kitten was about to burst with rage, and he put his hands up and tried to calm him down.
“It’s important, I promise.” Cole sighed, took out his pocket phone and sent a message to Roy to tell him that he was leaving. A second response came immediately.
"Go get him, tiger , I want all the details later.”
Cole laughed and put his phone down.
“I hope it's worth it.” With this last warning, he started the car and they took off. A few minutes later, Byron parked the car in front of a large house located in the suburbs. Byron asked him to wait and got in. Cole tried to see who had opened the door, but from where he was, he couldn’t see much. He looked at the car's clock, it was one thirty in the morning. He took his phone and started playing “Candy Crush", and about twenty minutes later, he was surprised by a knock on the window:
Byron was standing in front of him, holding a child in his arms, waiting for him to open the door. Oh, God! He cradled the boy in the backseat, who was refusing to sit there, and sat down, looking at Cole as if he were a kidnapper or something. There was no shadow of a doubt the child was Byron’s. He looked exactly like him, he even had the same caramel-coloured eyes. Byron was having fun with this, and gave him his most beautiful and sweet smile.
“Hello, I'm Cole.” The child kept looking at him and said nothing.
“He's a little shy, he’s just used to being around his family.” Cole wanted to remind him that, technically, he was Jason’s uncle, like Kate, Rob and John were, but he didn’t want to ruin the mood.
“Where to, now?” Byron started his car and headed to a new direction. Cole didn’t know how they could talk, now that Byron had gone to get Jason. Parking the car in front of a set of lofts, Byron got out of the vehicle, picked up his son and invited Cole to join them.
“This is where you live?” Cole asked, looking at the street.
“Yes, I bought the entire building. I will turn the bottom floor in my office and the top floor will be our apartment, for now. For a second, Cole thought he said "we", as in “Cole and Byron”, but then he remembered that it was more like “Byron and Jason”.
After putting his son in his bed, Byron joined Cole in the space that would be the living room. At this time, they only had two seats, but Byron was hoping that the shipping company would bring the rest by the end of the week. He motioned Cole to sit down and then, he sat down too.
“I’m sorry I picked Jason, but he can’t sleep without me.” Byron thought that ever since he had left the SEALs, Jason had become so attached to him in a way that he had never been during those years with his mother.
“It’s okay.” Cole said softly. Suddenly, he didn’t know what to say or where to start. Fortunately, Byron didn’t have the same problem.
“You better start from the beginning.” Sighing, Byron got up and stood in front of Cole.
“Hello, my name is Byron Cameron Winters.I'm thirty-five years and I'm divorced. I have a five years old son. I don’t have a job, but I’m hoping to start my business soon. I'm too authoritarian, and when it comes to love, I still have too much to learn. In fact, I’ve only loved one person in my life” he pointed to Jason’s bedroom. “Well, two now, and that’s you and Jason. If you give me one last chance, I promise I’ll make you happy.” Cole looked at the hand that Byron was holding out to him. He knew that if he accepted that hand, not only he would accept it, but also, he would accept giving their relationship another chance.
Did he want it?
Don’t be stupid, of course you want to.
But was it worth it?
If you could have Byron in his life, then, hell yeah!
But what about Jason? Would he be ready to beco
me a father?
Well, no one is born ready. I'm sure if you did something, Jason would hardly know!
It wasn’t worth making a list, it was the best option, to be honest. He had his faults too, and if Byron was able to live with them, he sure could try. He stood up and reached for Byron.
“Hello, I'm Cole Taylor, née De Vere. I’m twenty-eight years and I’m the Head of the Cardiology department. I have some problems, so I am being followed by a therapist, so I am better now. I have no children, but I would like to know yours.” They looked at each other, as they shook hands. Cole didn’t know where they were going with this, but with that grip, he had decided to give another chance to Byron and their love.
That night they didn’t sleep, as they talked about everything, and started making plans. They knew that it would still take time to trust their feelings, and to build something everlasting. For starters, they needed to date, something they had not done before.
***
Cole was feeling tired, as he looked at the table where they all the interventions of the day were written down, and he was glad to have nothing scheduled for that day. He started the day at six in the morning, and now it was almost eight o'clock. He needed to sleep really badly, and also, he missed Byron and Jason.
Ever since they had worked things out that their relationship was a ship that sailing at full speed; they started dating, and eventually, Byron had asked him to move in with him, but Cole hadn’t accepted yet. However, he had fallen in love with both father and son – over time, Jason had become used to his presence, and now, whenever he went to their house, after a day's work, he was always welcomed by a mini-tornado. He was a perfect copy of his father, so it was impossible not to love him.