The Ink That Brands Us: A Colorado Ink Novel

by Terra Deason

  He shrugged. “I saw you guys come in. Thought I’d come over and say hello.” He leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms across his chest.

  The way he said it made me think it was a lie, so I narrowed my eyes.

  “What?” He chuckled.

  Instead of answering, I shook my head and scanned the crowd for Alex before turning my attention back to Jensen.

  “Are you mad at me?” I blurted, taking him by surprise. His hard features softened and he leaned forward, taking my hand.

  “Of course not, luv.” He frowned and looked down at our joined hands. “I’m just mad at myself really.”

  I pulled my hand free and reached forward, lifting his face to meet mine. “You know you can talk to me about anything. You’re my friend, Jensen. You can trust me.”

  He pulled away from me and re crossed his arms. “I know.” I could see the turmoil in his eyes and decided that maybe a subject change was in order.

  “So, do you come here often?” I asked, not really caring. I had to do something about that sad look in his eyes.

  “Sometimes, but I haven’t been in a while.” He looked away from me as an attractive woman passed winking at Jensen. His eyes lingered after long after she disappeared in the crowd.

  “Do I need to steer clear of the apartment tonight?” I asked, playfully.

  When he looked back to me there was an intense look in his eyes. “I could ask you the same thing, luv.” He nodded to the crowd and I spotted Alex making his way towards us. I smiled up at him as he came to a stop at the table.

  “Jensen,” Alex said, nodding in his direction. He sat our drinks down on the table and motioned for Jensen to get up. “This is my date, so you can go now.”

  “Well we live together, so I thought I’d check and make sure she was okay,” Jensen bit back, but stood giving Alex his seat. The way he said it made it seem like more than it was.

  “You two live together?” Alex asked, looking to me in confusion.

  “We are roommates,” I said, narrowing my eyes at Jensen. “How do you guys know each other?”

  “Oh, we go way back. Isn’t that right, mate?” The way he said it made me think they weren’t friends at all.

  Alex just glared at Jensen. “What exactly are you doing here? Besides stalking your roommate.” This was getting out of hand fast and I was afraid to know what would happen if this continued. The way Jensen was glaring at Alex gave me a pretty good idea how this would go.

  “He was just leaving,” I said, giving Jensen a pleading look.

  “Right. I’ll let the two of you get back to your, ah, date.” He looked around like he disapproved of the venue Alex had chosen. Jensen looked to me and smiled brightly, then leaned in and brushed a light kiss across my cheek, causing me to shiver. “I’ll see you at home, luv.” He didn’t wait for Alex or me to say bye. He just disappeared into the crowd

  I stared at him for a moment too long, then looked to Alex. “Sorry about that. I have no idea what his deal is.”

  “Oh, I think I could guess.” Was all he said before downing his drink in one go. “I like you, Freya, but I have to tell you, I don’t like to share. So, if there is anything between you and Jensen, I need to know now.”

  I was taken aback by his frankness, but I could understand where he were coming from. If the roles were reversed, I would want to know too.

  “There is nothing between me and him. He literally moved in yesterday and before that I only seen him at work. He is just a friend.” It was the truth and no matter how much I had hoped that it would be different, I knew it wouldn’t be and now I have Alex to think about. I liked him and I would like to see where this goes.

  “Good.” He smiled at me and I smiled back. He really seemed like a sweet guy and the fact that he knew what he wanted in life was such a turn on. It’s rare to find a guy who knew exactly what he wanted.

  Time seems to move at warp speed when you’re having a great and before I knew it, it was after midnight and Alex was pulling up outside my apartment. Alex jumped out quickly and hurrying to open my door before I could do it myself. He was such a gentleman. He held out a hand and helped me out of his truck.

  “Can I walk you up?” he asked, still holding my hand into his.

  “Sure,” I nodded and together we headed upstairs.

  When we reached my door, panic took hold. I forgot to check to see if Jensen’s car was outside and I was afraid that he might do something else to embarrass me, especially if Alex tried to kiss me. It was the first kiss and there was always a lot of pressure surrounding it.

  Something must’ve shown on my face because, Alex just smiled at me. “Another night, then.” He gave my hand another squeeze and headed back down the stairs. I started towards Saw’s door when my phone dinged.

  Unknown: It’s Alex. You free tonight? And before you wonder. Saw gave me your number.

  I couldn’t help the grin that stretched across my face. He was just so cute.

  Me: Of course. I’ll see you at 8.

  Alex: I can’t wait.

  I tucked my phone back into my clutch and walked the short distance to Saw’s door. I reached up to knock, but the door flew open and for the second time that night I was startled to find Jensen standing in front of me.

  “Oh,” I said, taking a step back. He stared at me for the briefest moments before going to step around me, but I blocked his path. “Hey friend. I was glad to see you tonight.” I threw my arms around his neck and squeezed him. His body relaxed and he wrapped his arms around me, hugging me back.

  Too soon and without a word, he pulled away and headed across the hall to our apartment. I shook my head to clear it, then stepped into Saw’s apartment. I marched over to the couch where she was sitting and crossed my arms over my chest, trying to muster up the best glare I could.

  “It looks like we are no longer friends,” I said calmly and watched as her frown deepened. I bent down and threw my arms around her neck. “We are best friends! Thank you, thank you.” I pulled away and grinned down at her.

  “You had a good time, then?” She asked, hoping to her feet.

  “Yes!” I sighed. “He was so sweet! We danced and talked and it was so great! And we are going out tonight!” I could hardly contain my excitement.

  “That’s great!” she said, but I could smell her fake enthusiasm a mile a way.

  “What?” I said, narrowing my eyes.

  Something was definitely up and I was going to get to the bottom of it. Saw’s face wiped clean and she gave me a blank look. I had a sneaky suspicious that this conversation was going to piss me off, and I was sick of her keeping me in the dark.

  “Nothing. I’m glad you had a great time,” she said, sitting back on the couch.

  “Really? Because you kind of look like you wish I hadn’t.”

  “It’s not that.”

  “Then what? What are you not telling me? Is it Jensen? Bad mood seem to follow him around these days and I'm kinda sick of everyone keeping shit from me.” My patience had ran out, and I wanted answers.

  “It’s not him.” She didn’t meet my eyes.

  “Liar. Fine! I’ll ask him.” I stomped to the door, but she scrambled to her, grabbing my arm to stop me.

  “Freya, just leave it alone,” she warned. “He’s just dealing with some stuff and he needs time.”

  “What does that eve mean? I’m his friend just like you are his friend. He talks to you, so why can’t he talk to me?”

  “It’s...it’s just different, okay?”

  “No. Not okay. I want to know what’s going on with him.”

  “It’s not for me to say. Please, just leave it alone for now. It he wants you to know, then he will come to you.”

  Her eyes were pleading and I could see the worry in her eyes. I stared at her for a moment and contemplated on just ignoring her and demanding answers, but from what I could see I wouldn’t be getting them. Not now at least.

  “Fine,” I grumbled and left.
<
br />   I stood outside my door, preparing myself before I went inside. It wasn’t my business and if he wanted me to know he would tell me. If I kept reminding myself of that, then maybe I could keep my mouth shut and drop it. If I was in luck, he would be in bed and I would have to worry about seeing him again tonight anyway.

  With a breath, I pushed the door open and stepped inside. Jensen wasn’t in the living room or kitchen so that meant I was in the clear. I hurried straight to my bedroom and closed my door as quietly as possible. My bed looked so inviting and I was so glad I didn’t have class later and didn’t have to be at work until noon.

  I started towards my bed when a soft knock sounded on my door.

  “Come in,” I called and tried to steel myself. I could do this. I could mind my own business.

  Jensen pushed the door open, standing in my doorway only in a pair of pajama bottoms. Heat rushed to my cheeks as I tried unsuccessfully to not check out his body. It was a lost cause and surely no one would hold it against me.

  I swallowed hard and meet his eyes. He looked amused, and I narrowed my eyes.

  “What’s up?” I asked, crossing my arms.

  His eyes still looked sad as he took me in. It was obvious he appreciated my appearance as much as I appreciated his. When his eyes met mine, I wanted to cross the room and hug him to me until he wasn’t sad anymore, but I reminded myself that it wasn’t my business that he was sad.

  “Just wanted to see how your date went. Oh, and to apologize if I caused any problems.” He looked sorry, so I decided to forgive him.

  “No worries. It went great. Thanks for asking.”

  “That’s good. You deserve to have a good time.” He turned to leave, but I called after him.

  “Hey Jensen.”

  He turned to stare. “Yea, luv?”

  I was going to ask him if he was okay, but thought better of it. “It’s just, could you unzip me?” I could unzip myself, but I owed him for showing up at my door shirtless. I mean, it was pretty obvious I like to look at him without his shirt on. No need to flaunt it.

  His eyes darkened, but he entered the room walking to stand behind me. His fingers brushed my neck as he grabbed the zipper and when he pulled it down, his fingers flutter on every inch of exposed skin. I shivered as his contact and had to work not to lean into him.

  He leaned forward, his lips brushing my ear. “Goodnight, luv.” He walked around me and walked out the door.

  Fifteen

  Things seemed to die down after a few weeks and Jensen and I established a route that seemed to work for the both of us. We didn’t talk about what was going on with him and we would take him mood swings in stride. As in we ignored them all together and I pretended that it was just normal Jensen behavior. Which at this point it seemed to be.

  During the week he normally came home after work and sometimes we would carpool. On the weekends, however, I’ve found that he is a busy guy and sometimes I wouldn’t see him until earlier Sunday morning. I tried not to let it get me down because it fell into the ‘it’s not my business’ category and I was trying to get past my feeling for him, plus I was seeing Alex now.

  Jensen never brought his conquests to the apartment, and it turned into an unspoken rule we both seemed to follow. I showed the same respect by not allowing Alex to come over. This bugged Alex to no end, but I didn’t want to risk another show down if I let Alex come over and Jensen was home.

  “Frey?” Jensen snapped his fingers in front of my face. I blinked up at him, bringing him into focus.

  “Sorry, what?” I asked, confused.

  “All right, luv?”

  “Oh, yeah. I’m fine. Just not fully awake, I guess.” We were sitting at the bar in the kitchen, eating the breakfast he had cooked us.

  “Well, now that I have you back, what would you like to do today?”

  A smile lit my face as I realized that today was Sunday. Sunday was ‘roommate day’. We were both off work and we dedicated the entire day hanging out with just each other. It was a day I looked forward to all week and a day I dreaded all week. Mostly because I felt like I shouldn’t be looking forward to it, but I couldn’t help it. I liked hanging out with Jensen.

  “I’m not sure. What did you have in mind?”

  “Well, you were saying last night you were tired of rereading all your old books, so I thought we might hit up the library. Or the bookstore.”

  It was things like that that made it hard for me not to have feelings for him. He was so thoughtful and listened to me when I talked. Like what I was saying was important, and he found it interesting. Alex didn’t understand my love for reading and always brushed it off as a boring way to spend time. It made my head spin. I knew I should have feelings towards Alex because he was my sort of boyfriend, but here I was grinning at Jensen like he was the reason for my existence.

  I was so messed up.

  “That sounds perfect,” I said, smiling up at him.

  “Get your cute arse up and go get ready.” He stood grabbing my plate and his and rounded the bar into the kitchen, giving me a wink as he passed. My stomach did a little flip and I suppressed a giggle as I skipped down the hallway to my room.

  My phone ran as soon as we pulled to a stop in front of the library. I pulled it out of my bag and Alex’s face flashed across the screen.

  “I’ll meet you inside,” I said to Jensen, stepping out of the car. I swiped my finger across the screen. “Hey Alex!”

  “Hey beautiful,” he greeted me “I was thinking about you today and I want to see you. Can I pick you up?”

  “Oh. I’m sorry, Alex. I already have plans today.” Did it make me a bad girlfriend because I didn’t want to blow of Jensen for Alex?

  “I’m sure Saw will understand. I mean she gets you every Sunday.”

  I cringed and worried my lip before answering. “Actually, I’m not with Saw today. I’m with Jensen.” I held my breath and waited.

  “You’re telling me you can’t hang out with me, your boyfriend, because you’re with another guy? That’s kind of fucked up, Freya.”

  “He’s not another guy. He’s my roommate and my friend. You know it’s not like that.”

  “Kinda seems like that.”

  “We’re just book shopping.”

  “Well, that’s not a big deal. He’ll understand if you ditch him.”

  I tried to keep the steel out of my voice. “It is a big deal. I like books.”

  “You can’t be serious right now. Are you seriously choosing him over me?”

  “Alex!”

  “Whatever, Freya. When you can find time for your actual boyfriend, call me.” The line went dead, and I stared at it in outrage.

  He couldn’t be serious right now? Did he really think it was like that between Jensen and me? He knew we were roommates and friends. I considered calling him back and giving him a piece of my time, but decided that I was wasting precious library time worrying about stupid boyfriend drama.

  I shoved my phone back into my bag and made my way into the library. Jensen was waiting for me right inside and once he spotted me, he looked concerned. I waved him off, stomping towards the nearest stacks.

  I made it all the way to the end when Jensen, pulled me to a stop. My shoulders slumped and I let out a frustrated huff.

  “What is it, luv?”

  “Alex is stupid. He wanted me to ditch you and spend the day with him, but when I wouldn’t he got mad.”

  “Why didn’t you?”

  “Because you’re my friend; probably my best friend and because today is roommate day. I want to spend it with you.” He looked as conflicted as I felt. I knew it was crazy not to chose my boyfriend over my friend, but I never said I wasn’t crazy.

  “Luv,” he started, but I cut him off.

  “No. It’s fine. He will get over it. Now, come on. These books aren’t going to pick themselves.” I gave him a reassuring smile and took his hand, pulling him along behind me.

  We browsed for what felt like h
ours. Each of us pulling books off the shelves, giving one another suggestions and teasing each other on our odd picks. It was the most fun I had had in a really long time and I wasn’t sure a visit to the library would be the same without him.

  We both ended up leaving with a handful of books, knowing we would have them read well before they were due.

  “God! I’m starved!” I groaned, as we climbed into his car.

  “What sounds good?” He asked, pulling out of the parking lot.

  “Food.”

  “No! Really?” He said, sarcastically. “What kind of food.”

  “I don’t know. What do you want?”

  “Jimmy’s?”

  “No. I’m not in the mood for burgers.”

  He cut his eyes at me, giving me the ‘don’t you fucking dare’ look. Laughter bubbled up my throat, and I doubled over.

  “You should see your face!”

  He pressed his lips together, trying not to smile, but failed.

  “Very funny, luv.”

  I sighed, sitting up right in my seat. “Seafood sounds good. Wanna hit up that place downtown?”

  “Sounds good.” I almost lost it again, when relief flashed across his face, but I bit my lip to hold it in.

  We had just missed the lunch rush and we seated quickly. The hostess eyed Jensen as she placed our menus on our table. I couldn’t help but roll my eyes as she retreated.

  “What?” Jensen asked.

  “Do they have to be so obvious? What if I were your girlfriend? It’s just rude.”

  “I’m sure you’re mistaken,” he chuckled, slipping open his menu.

  “You’ll see. If your server is a woman she will check you out.” I was positive.

  “I doubt that.”

  “Wanna bet?”

  He eyed me for a moment. “What are the terms?”

  “Whatever you want.” His eyes gleamed, and I almost regretted say it.

  “Okay, luv. If I win, then I want you to sleep with me.” My eyes almost bugged and I opened my mouth to protest, but he continued. “Not in the manner you’re obviously thinking. I meant sleep. With me in my bed for one night.” That didn’t sound to bad.