If You Only Knew (And Then Came Love Book 1)

by Preston, Sara

  Julian bit his tongue. His dad subject hopped as much as he did. “How in the hell does this have anything do with Liza?”

  “Because if you end up in the hospital again, you’ll have someone else worrying over you. Someone who doesn’t need the added stress. She’s pregnant, Julian. With your kid. Give her the respect she deserves and take care of yourself.” Everett stopped pacing, strode across the room, and placed his hand on Julian’s shoulder. “Son, I love you, but you need to be careful.”

  Julian let out a deep breath and stood. Sometimes it took his father to hit him with a ton of mental bricks before things go through to him. “Thanks, Dad. I think I know what I need to do.”

  “Good.” Everett nodded and motioned him over.

  Julian stopped and took a step back. “You’re not going to smack me in the head are you?”

  “Nope.” Everett opened his arms. “Just thought you might humor an old man and give your dad a hug.”

  Julian laughed. “You’re not an old man.” He embraced his father.

  “Much too old to have to deal with his son in the hospital over stupid decisions.” Everett sighed and rested his hand on Julian’s shoulder. “I love you, son.”

  “Love you, too, Dad.”

  “Go and make up with Liza.”

  “She’s at work now. I’ll have to wait until she gets home.” He headed for the door.

  “There is a thing called a phone — you could make use of it for the beginning of your apology.” Everett called after him.

  Julian laughed as he waved at his dad. “I’ll catch you later.”

  “Later.”

  *****

  Liza peered at the clock on the dashboard when she pulled into the apartment complex. 9:58 P.M. Julian was going to be livid, but she did it to prove a point. She finished her paperwork at the office, so she’d be late coming home. He’d called her twice and sent her a couple text messages, all of which she ignored.

  She headed up to her apartment and opened the door to find him sitting on the couch.

  “Good evening.” He twisted his body to look at her. “How was work?”

  “Fine.” This was not the reaction she expected.

  “Did you have an extra visit?”

  There it was. He was itching to start a fight about her being home late. “No, I stayed to finish my paperwork.”

  “Good.” Julian rubbed his neck and his leg bounced. He fought against saying something.

  “What’s going on?” She stood in front of him.

  “Nothing.” He didn’t meet her eyes, he looked anywhere but at her.

  “Are you breaking up with me again?” She stood straight, her feet shoulder width apart, and her arms crossed.

  “No.” He met her gaze and then glanced away.

  “Then why are you having a hard time looking at me?”

  “Because I’m fighting asking you why the hell it took you two hours for you to make a forty-five minute trip home.” His voice was calm, but barely controlled.

  Liza smiled, realizing she had the upper hand. She straddled his lap. “I’m surprised, you didn’t seem to catch on this morning.”

  He let out a deep breath and lifted her off his lap.

  “Hey!”

  He placed her next to him, stood, and began to pace the floor.

  She watched and a grin crossed her face.

  He growled. “Damn it, Liza. Why the fuck did it take you two hours to get here? You didn’t answer my calls, you didn’t answer my texts! I was worried.”

  “Worried something happened or worried I was screwing around on you?” She stretched her arms out over the back of the couch.

  “I—” He sank onto the couch and buried his head in his hands.

  She rested a hand on his shoulder. “I appreciate you trying to control your own emotions, rather than trying to control me. But you have to trust me, Julian.”

  “I do trust you. I can’t stop the thoughts racing through my head sometimes.” He leaned his head against the couch.

  Liza climbed into his lap again, wrapped her arms around him, and pressed a kiss to his lips. “If you need to get mad, if you need to say something, then do it. But don’t expect me to fall in line every time you say jump.”

  “I guess now would be a terrible time to tell you I want you.” He ran his hand slowly down her back.

  Liza whispered in his ear. “Sometimes there’s nothing wrong with taking charge.”

  He chuckled, bringing his hands to her hips and flipping her on her back. He settled between her thighs and brushed the hair out of her face. “Woman, I love you.”

  “I know.”

  Julian grinned. “Is that a mirror in your pocket, baby?”

  “What?”

  “Because, I can see myself in your pants.”

  Liza laughed. “Cocky aren’t you?”

  “Let me show exactly how cocky I am.” He lifted her hips and she squealed until he pressed his lips to hers.

  *****

  May 6th

  “This was nice, but why dinner rather than breakfast?” Liza followed Julian into the living room at his parents’ house on Sunday.

  He draped his arm across her shoulder. “Gram’s sister is in the hospital, so Mom and Dad took her to see her. They came home last night, but figured it would be easier to change breakfast to dinner.”

  “Is your great aunt doing okay, then?”

  “They’re releasing her tomorrow, so I guess she’s fine. Bad bout of the flu.” Julian scanned the room.

  Liza saw Ava and smiled they’d sat apart at dinner and hadn’t been able to catch up.

  The two of them headed in Ava’s direction. She stood talking to Drew.

  Drew punched Julian in the arm. “What the hell did you tell Dad about the other night?”

  Julian rubbed his arm and glared at his twin. “What the fuck? I told him you had a bad night.”

  “How about you told him you were drinking?” Drew pursed his lips. “I got fucking lecture for half an hour last night because I let you drink?”

  Ava smacked Drew in the arm. “What in the hell were you thinking giving him alcohol?”

  Drew narrowed his gaze, staring straight at Julian.

  Julian looked over at Liza.

  Liza shook her head. “I think he deserved the lecture. Hope you got one.”

  “Oh I got one.” Julian nodded. “Dad read me the riot act.”

  Liza laughed.

  Ava motioned toward Julian. “I see you’ve forgiven his sorry ass. I hope you made him pay dearly.”

  “Oh I made him work for it.” Liza nodded and bumped Julian with her shoulder. “I even made him say the ‘L’ word.”

  “Wow.” Ava grinned. “The ‘L’ word and a baby on the way, aren’t you moving up in the world, Julian.”

  Julian pressed a kiss to Liza’s head. “This woman right here is the best thing that ever happened to me.” He glanced over at Drew who had his arms folded across his chest. “Come on, man lighten up. I think Dad was more concerned about the extra Adderall l I took then he was about the beer.”

  “Excuse me?” Liza faced him. “When we’re you going to fill me in on that little tidbit?”

  Drew chuckled. “Now you get two lectures.”

  Julian shrugged. “I deserve it.”

  Ava tapped Liza on the shoulder and motioned with her head toward the porch. “Feel up for some girl talk?”

  Liza pointed at Julian. “She just saved your sorry ass from a lecture.”

  “Yes, ma’am.” Julian winked at Liza.

  “Ma’am?” Liza rested her hands on her hips. “Since when do I look like a ma’am?”

  Julian grinned and kissed her cheek. “You’re sexy when you’re mad,” he whispered and nipped her ear lobe. “I’ll be waiting for the lecture.”

  Liza bit her lip in an effort not to smile. She fought the laughter bubbling up inside and pointed to the door. “Let’s go.”

  “What’d he say?” Ava looped her arm wi
th Liza’s as they headed to the porch.

  Liza cracked up. “He said I was sexy when I was mad and then he nipped my ear.” Her gaze drifted back to him and he blew her a kiss.

  Ava rolled her eyes, but smiled. “You two are perfect together.” She pulled open the door to the back porch and let Liza go in ahead of her. Checking all the doors and windows before she rested against the door and sighed. “I’ve been sleeping with Drew and it is the most incredible sex I’ve ever had in my life.”

  “Wow.” Liza’s mouth dropped open. “Good thing I’m not drinking something, I’d be spraying it all over you. Are you two dating?”

  “No!” Ava sank in one of the wicker chairs. “We’re doing the whole friends with benefits thing. I’m nowhere near interested in a relationship.”

  “With anyone or just Drew?” Liza sat across from her.

  “With anyone. Although, I guess if I had to choose someone to be in a relationship with, Drew’s not a bad candidate.” Ava leaned her head against the chair.

  “Wait, what? You spent all day in FBI custody the other day and the only thing you have to tell me about is sex with Drew? What the hell happened?”

  Ava shrugged. “He’s dead. And we didn’t kill him. Just because he’s dead doesn’t make him any less of a dick.”

  “You’re nuts.” Liza pressed her fingers to her temples. “Doesn’t it mean anything to you?”

  “Are you kidding me? I left the bastard for a reason.” Ava held up her hands up. “I don’t want to talk about him, I want to talk about Drew. We’re having fun.”

  Liza shook her head. When Audrey said Ava was a wild one, she hadn’t been exaggerating. “How can you do that? Just turn off the emotions like they’re not even there. Julian left me and I was a mess. You spent the day in FBI custody, lost your ex-husband, and all you want to do is talk about how great the sex with Drew is?”

  Ava shrugged. “Why would I want to talk about that crap? It brings up bad memories. I want to talk about the one positive thing in my life right now.”

  “I guess I can see your point.” Liza didn’t understand Ava’s reasons, but there was no convincing her of anything else. “I had what I considered a fling in college. We dated for about a month—”

  “Honey, a fling has nothing to do with a relationship. I’ve had flings – they last one or two times. Three times at the most. I can’t even call what Drew and I are doing a fling. Too much time spent together.”

  “Then why don’t you two date?” Liza found herself frustrated with Ava. She liked her, but she was definitely different. “I mean if you’re not seeing anyone else, then what’s stopping you from dating?”

  “Dating involves a commitment.” Ava waved her hand. “Not for me. Not for me at all.”

  Liza laughed. “I don’t see the difference between what you’re doing now and dating, other than you’re not telling the family about it.”

  “It’s sex, pure and simple. We’re not dating.”

  “Whatever you say.”

  The door opened and Julian stepped through. “You about ready to go?”

  “It’s it time to go?” Ava grinned. “I’m going to go find your brother.” She gave Liza a quick hug before leaving the porch.

  Liza sat staring across the room.

  “You okay?” Julian rested a hand on her back.

  “Wow — that woman hands out TMI like it’s candy.”

  Julian laughed. “Does that mean she confirmed she’s sleeping with Drew?”

  “She may be a little over the top, but anything she told me is between me and her. If you want to know, ask Drew.” Liza stood and walked over to him.

  Julian placed his hand on her lower back. He kissed her temple. “If you only knew what that meant to me.”

  Chapter Fifteen

  June 1st

  “Do you have a rubber band?” Liza rummaged through the drawers of the vanity. Why couldn’t she find things when she needed them? “One month. They’re getting engaged after one month.”

  She and Julian were getting ready to go to his parents house. His brother Trevor was proposing to his girlfriend whom he’d known for a month.

  She threw the junk from the counter in the drawers. Three months pregnant and not even a thought of moving this relationship along. She slammed the drawer.

  Julian leaned against the wall. “No why?”

  Liza struggled with the button on her jeans. It wasn’t that far of a stretch.

  Julian smoothed his hands down her back and around her waist. He caught her hands and pressed a kiss to her cheek.

  She lowered her gaze.

  “You’re beautiful.” He ran his hand over her belly.

  “I’m huge.” Liza stopped his hand. “If I’m this big at twelve weeks, I’m going to be enormous at nine months.”

  Julian lifted her chin and pointed to the mirror. “You know what I see when I look at you?”

  Liza turned around in his arms and buried her face against his chest. “I don’t want to hear it. I—”

  “I see a woman who gets more beautiful every day. She’s radiant, glowing, and is giving me the greatest gift a woman can give a man.”

  Liza looked up at him, her lips set straight. She was still mad, her heart soared at his words, but it was far from a proposal. Oh, he was infuriating at times.

  “Why don’t we go clothes shopping after we get done at my parent’s house?”

  “I want my old clothes to fit.” She pouted.

  Julian chuckled.

  She shot him a glare and shoved away from him. “Glad you think it’s so fucking funny.” She stormed out of the room, pulled the hair tie off her wrist, and used it to clasp her pants.

  “I get the feeling, you’re mad about something other than your clothes not fitting.” Julian sat on the bed.

  Liza yanked a gray tank top with a crocheted straps out of the closet and pulled it over her head. “Should I wear something nicer?” She outlined her body with her hands.

  “You look wonderful.”

  Liza scanned her closet and moved hangers across the bar. “Your brother’s proposing to his girlfriend.”

  Julian plucked at his striped v-neck t-shirt. “Does it look like I’m going all out? It’s Trevor. He may be attempting some grand romantic gesture, but he’ll screw it up.”

  “Nice.” Liza glared at him. “At least he’s attempting a grand romantic gesture.” She blew out a breath and headed out into the living.

  Julian followed. ”Oh, I get it.”

  “He’s proposing after being together less than a month, Julian.” She turned around to face him, grabbed her purse from the table, and then dropped onto the couch. “Nevermind.”

  “It’s probably closer to two months.” Julian sat down next to her and pulled her into his lap.

  Liza sneered. “One month, two months, hell even three months, what’s it matter? They’re getting engaged.”

  “I love you, Liza.”

  She rested her head on his shoulder and intertwined her fingers with his. “I’m twelve weeks preg—”

  He palmed the back of her neck as he crushed his lips to hers, with an intoxicating kiss. He trailed kisses across her jaw until his breath touched her ear. “You were saying.”

  She held up her left hand.

  “Not enough, huh?” He rested his head against hers. His hand moved under her shirt sliding up her body.

  She hopped off his lap and removed his hand from her shirt. “Nice try, but not quite.”

  “All expenses paid for clothes shopping tonight? I’ll even throw in a pedicure.” He rubbed circles on her back.

  She raised her eyebrows and met his gaze. “Quit trying to buy me.”

  “Not going to be distracted, are you?”

  “Not a bit” She covered her face with her hands.

  “Liza, you know my reasons.” Julian raked his hand through his hair.

  She stood and moved toward the door. “I shouldn’t have brought it up.”

  “Ba
be—” He touched her shoulder.

  She stepped away from him and opened the door. “We’ll be late.”

  *****

  Julian sat on the back porch.

  The door opened and Drew joined him.

  “Trevor did a great job of fucking that up didn’t he?” He sat down next to his brother.

  “Yeah.” Julian shrugged.

  “Questioning your girlfriend’s logic isn’t the best way to propose.” Drew chuckled.

  “I can’t believe she said yes.” Julian let out a deep breath. “I need a drink.”

  “No you don’t.” Drew clapped his brother on the shoulder. “You and Liza fighting?”

  “Trevor proposed after knowing Ari a short period of time. Liza’s three months pregnant. Guess what the conversation was like before we left the house?” Julian crossed his arms and let his head fall against the chair.

  “That doesn’t mean you need a drink. It means you need to reconsider your priorities now you’ve found the right woman. And don’t give me shit about your ex’s. Because neither of those bitches loved you.”

  “I’ve been down that road twice there won’t be a third time.” Julian shook his head.

  “Come on, you have to be able to see Liza’s nothing like them.”

  “It doesn’t matter.”

  Liza joined them. “Drew, Ava’s looking for you.”

  “That woman’s going to kill me.” Drew stood and looked at Julian. “If you need to talk, day or night, lay it on me.”

  Julian nodded. “I will.”

  Drew headed over to the door. He stopped at the door, right in front of Liza. “And no drinking.”

  “Drinking?” Liza gave Drew a sideways glance.

  Drew smiled and headed into the house.

  “Why’s he talking about drinking?” Liza walked over to where he sat.

  Julian caught her arm and tugged her into his lap. “You know I love you, right?” He wrapped his arms around her and rested his forehead against hers.

  “Yes.” She curled her arms around his neck and kissed him. “Why do you need a drink?”

  “If I love you and you love me—” He traced her jaw line with his fingers. “What’s a ring or a proposal—”

  “I want to spend the rest of my life with you, ring or no ring.” Liza pressed a kiss to his cheek. “Now, stop avoiding my question and tell me why Drew’s worried about you drinking.”