Thursday (Timeless Series #4)

by E. L. Todd

  “Well…yeah.” Axel seemed embarrassed by all of this. “Anyway, Marie started dating this guy and I didn’t like it. I always felt sick when I saw her with him. And when I saw her kissing him on the doorstep…a small part of me died.”

  “Awe…” I couldn’t keep the gasp from escaping.

  Axel carried on. “We talked about it and realized it wasn’t going to happen. I wasn’t ready for a relationship and it would be weird for Francesca if we started dating, especially if we broke up down the road. It just wasn’t working so we went back to being friends.”

  Hawke listened to every word he said, ignoring everyone else at the table. “That didn’t last long, huh?”

  “Then she started dating this other dude, a total loser—”

  “What?” I snapped. “You didn’t even meet him.”

  “I didn’t need to,” Axel argued. “He wasn’t good enough for you. Nobody is.”

  My eyes softened all over again. “Awe…”

  “Marie accused me of being shallow,” Axel explained. “She had a thing for me in high school but I didn’t notice her until recently. She had a point. All I really care about is beauty. I’ve never bothered to get to know a girl before…”

  Hawke listened attentively, his own thoughts hidden away.

  “But I noticed things were different with Marie. When I wasn’t with her I thought about her. I noticed all the little details she had, like the way her hair fell around her face when she turned, and the little freckles on her skin…just stuff like that. When I wasn’t with her, I missed her. All I ever wanted to do was be with her—and I didn’t want to sleep with her.”

  Hawke kept his fingers wrapped around his glass.

  “So, I told her how I felt—that I wanted her for the good stuff on the inside and not the outside.”

  Hawke nodded when the tale was over. “That’s sweet, Axel.”

  “I mean, I do care about what’s on the outside,” Axel said. “I think Marie is sexy as hell. I’m not going to sugarcoat that.”

  Hawke chuckled. “Physical attraction is important.”

  “And we aren’t lacking,” Axel said, putting his arm around my shoulders.

  “I always knew you would settle down,” Hawke said. “I’m glad I got to witness it.”

  “Whoa, hold on.” Axel pulled his arm away. “Who said anything about settling down? We’re just dating.”

  I didn’t let those words offend me. Our relationship was relatively new. We hadn’t even said we loved each other. But it did bother me—on some level.

  Hawke chuckled. “You want my two cents?”

  Axel shook his head. “Not really.”

  “If you haven’t found a single woman you’ve wanted to be with until now—when you’re thirty—then you know you’ve found the one. Maybe you don’t realize it right this second but you will.”

  Axel remained quiet, his thoughts hidden.

  “When Francesca and I…I knew.” Hawke stared at his glass and didn’t make eye contact with either one of us. “There wasn’t a specific thing she did or said. One day you wake up and just know.”

  I couldn’t believe he talked about Francesca like that, after he left her without looking back. He said they were never getting back together, but he talked about her like she was his one true love. It made no sense to me.

  Axel didn’t say anything, probably having no idea what to say.

  I kept my mouth shut because I had nothing nice to say when it came to Francesca. If he really loved her he would be with her right now. They’d be happy together and she wouldn’t be curled up in bed at this very moment.

  Hawke stirred his wine and watched it dance. “How is she?”

  It was a loaded question and I didn’t know how to respond.

  Axel was quiet too.

  “She’s great.” There was no way in hell I was going to let him know what a pathetic wreck she was. He wasn’t going to get that kind of satisfaction, knowing she still mourned him even after all this time. “She’s excited for the semester to end and to graduate.”

  “Did she win that baking contest?” he asked.

  What baking contest?

  Axel took over. “She killed it—like always. Got a nice ribbon out of it.”

  It must be one of the lies he made up. “And she’s seeing someone.”

  Hawke looked up at that statement, the sorrow in his eyes. It was only there for a moment, and then like it never happened at all it disappeared. “I see…”

  Axel shot me a glare.

  “Yeah,” I continued on. “He’s a business major too. They worked on a project together and then he asked her out. It’s pretty casual right now but she seems to like him.” I couldn’t make it sound like she fell in love already because that just wasn’t realistic.

  Hawke hid his despair but he didn’t hide it well enough. “Good for her…”

  Even that wouldn’t make him go back to her?

  “I was afraid she would break down and lose herself.” He stirred the wine again. “I’m glad she’s living her life to the fullest. I want her to be happy because she deserves the greatest kind of happiness in the world.” He stared at the wine before he took a long drink.

  When he said things like that I didn’t hate him so much. Even though he left her it seemed like he still cared about her—even loved her.

  “How are you?” Axel asked.

  He finished the glass before he left it on the table. “Pretty much the same as the day I left. And I’ll always be this way until the day I die.”

  Damn, he was intense.

  Axel eyed him carefully before he spoke. “It’s never too late to get back together. Why don’t you—”

  “No.” He held up his hand to silence Axel. “She’s doing great without me and I’m not messing with that.”

  What? Did we just sabotage Francesca’s happiness? “Whoa, hold on. Just because she’s seeing someone doesn’t mean she’s over you.”

  “I’m sure this guy is nice and he can give her the kind of future he deserves,” Hawke said. “If I walk into her life again it’ll disrupt all of that. I left for a reason and I have to stick with it. It’s the best for her.”

  Goddammit.

  “Dude, if you want to get back together you should at least tell her.” Axel panicked and didn’t even bother hiding it. He was playing it cool just a moment ago and now all his cards were on the table.

  “I’ll always want to get back together with her,” Hawke said. “But I can’t. I have to keep moving forward. Maybe it’ll get easier with every passing day. Maybe one day I’ll stop thinking about her altogether…however unlikely that is.” He filled his glass again, almost pouring it until it reached the top.

  Axel shared a look with me, clearly unsure what to do.

  Whatever problems Hawke and Francesca had would never go away. It haunted both of them.

  And I would give anything to know exactly what those problems were.

  ***

  I had no interest in fooling around after seeing Hawke. My mojo completely disappeared after that conversation. My relationship with Axel wasn’t perfect but at least we understood each other.

  I didn’t understand Hawke at all.

  What could possibly be the reason for keeping the distance between them?

  Axel parked in front of the house and killed the engine.

  “Do you think there’s something wrong with him?”

  Axel knew whom I was referring to because he’d been thinking about him himself the whole ride home. “Like what?”

  “Like he has a disease or something. Maybe he can’t be with her because he knows something will happen to him…” It was a far reach but I didn’t have any better guesses. “Like Huntington’s disease.”

  “Doubtful.”

  “What else could it be?”

  Axel shrugged. “I really don’t know. And I don’t think neither one of us will ever figure it out.”

  If Francesca hadn’t told me by now then she
probably never would. “You’re right.”

  We walked into the house and noticed Francesca’s door was closed. She was probably asleep or hovering in her insanity. We went into my room and locked the door behind us.

  It wasn’t difficult to sneak around Francesca, not when she was oblivious to everything around her. She could walk in on Axel and I screwing on the couch and it probably wouldn’t register.

  She was that numb.

  Axel tossed his jacket on the back of my desk chair then unbuttoned his shirt. “I can’t believe we ran into Hawke tonight…”

  “I can’t believe it either.” I slipped off my heels and immediately felt my feet relax in relief. I slipped off my dress and stood in my strapless bra and thong. My back was to Axel and I didn’t turn around as I undressed. He’d already seen me naked but it didn’t feel right letting him see me now. The moment just wasn’t right.

  I pulled on a nightshirt then turned around and faced the bed.

  He stood in his boxers, the definition obvious in the material. He gave me a heated look but nothing more. Then he pulled the covers back and got into bed. “Your bed is comfy.”

  “Thanks.” I got in beside him then set an alarm.

  He groaned. “What are you setting an alarm for?”

  “Well, you have to leave then come back.”

  “Why?”

  “Because Francesca will know you slept here.”

  “Whatever,” he said with a sigh. “I don’t even care anymore.”

  “Well, I do. I want to tell her, but in a better way.”

  He didn’t make any further argument.

  I pulled the sheets to my shoulder and cuddled into his side. The second I felt his body, every stress I had ebbed away. Being with him, even in silence, was soothing. There was nothing else I’d rather do than lay together, wrapped in the warmth of each other’s arms.

  Axel’s arm moved around my shoulders and his hand rested in my hair. He felt the strands softly, running them through his fingers. He watched me with lidded eyes, taking in my features. He didn’t lean into kiss me or give any indication that’s what he wanted. In that moment, all he wanted was to look at me.

  My hand glided across his hard chest and stopped when it reached the skin over his heart. I felt his heartbeat, slow and steady. It was relaxed, at peace. My fingers naturally traced the area, worshipping the organ that made him so beautiful. Times like this made me realize conversation wasn’t necessary. As long as we were in each other’s presence we didn’t need anything else. These quiet moments, when nothing exciting seemed to happen, were the most exciting moments of all.

  Day Of Hell

  Marie

  My arm was better and I had full range of motion. My old slings were shoved into the back of one of my drawers and my life had returned to normal. I had a whole prescription of vicodin left over that I had no use for but I couldn’t toss it. Instead, I shoved it into the medicine cabinet in the spare bathroom just in case I might need it someday. There probably wouldn’t be any complications with my shoulder, but it was always smart to be prepared.

  Axel showered and changed in my bathroom before he visited the rest of the house, giving the impression he just came over after staying at his place. Francesca hadn’t noticed anything. And if she did, she didn’t care enough to say something about it.

  Axel opened the fridge and eyed everything inside. “Should I even bother making breakfast…?”

  Francesca came out of her shell slightly but she was still a mess. She still had no appetite or motivation to do anything. Hawke seemed devastated but he was still up and about. I couldn’t understand why she didn’t do the same. “Just make her some eggs.”

  “Then I have to get the pan out, buffer it, wash it…it’s a lot of work if she’s not going to eat.” He shut the door but still stayed in the same place, arguing with himself quietly.

  “Then I’ll make it.” I felt like the good cop of this situation.

  “I don’t mind. I just don’t want to waste my time.” He was particularly irritable this morning. Last night we lay in bed together and stared into each other’s eyes until we fell asleep. Neither one of us seemed interested in getting physical. Just being together was enough. Come to think of it, we hadn’t even tried making love—yet.

  “Let me take care of it.” I guided him out of the way then scrambled the eggs before I poured them into the pan. Axel had a bad habit of screaming at Francesca and I wanted to stop that from happening. It didn’t make Axel feel better ,and I knew it didn’t help Francesca either.

  I cooked the eggs then set them on a plate at the table. “I’ll get her.”

  Axel stood at the counter and poured a mug of coffee.

  I knocked before I stepped into her bedroom. “Come on, Frankie. Time to wake up.”

  She faced the opposite wall. “For what?”

  “I made scrambled eggs with a pinch of pepper—just the way you like them.”

  “No, thank you.” She pulled the sheets tighter around her.

  If she didn’t eat now she wouldn’t eat all day. “You need to eat something.”

  “Put it in the fridge. Maybe I’ll eat them later.”

  She was way too skinny at this point. Her muscle composition had waned and she hardly had any fat on her. It was getting to the point where I was scared for her health. “You better eat them later.” I shut the door then walked back into the kitchen. I had a full schedule today, both work and school. I needed to get a move on it.

  Axel looked beyond mad. “Is she coming?”

  I wanted to cover for my friend but I didn’t see how. “Her stomach is acting up…”

  He narrowed his eyes.

  “Must be the bug or something.”

  He must have known I was lying because he marched off.

  Oh no.

  I heard her bedroom door burst open. “Your friend makes you breakfast and you aren’t going to eat it?”

  Francesca and Axel bickered from time-to-time but they never had really big fights like this. It was impossible to make Axel mad, but with his sister he had a short fuse.

  “I didn’t ask her to.” Francesca’s voice was barely audible.

  “You didn’t ask her to take care of your schoolwork or your bills but she’s doing that too. Not once have you thanked her or showed her any type of appreciation. You just lay around like a disgusting pig.”

  I sat at the kitchen table and prayed he would finish.

  “I’m paying your rent and your car payment but I haven’t gotten a thank you for that either. Frankie, it’s been two months. Hawke is out screwing around and getting laid while you’re moping around like a sorry excuse for a person. He’s not coming back and you need to get over it. Get off your ass and grow a goddamn backbone.”

  Please be finished.

  “I had to put up with Dad and all of his bullshit, and now I have to put up with you. I’m tired of getting the short stick all the time. You’re perfectly capable of taking care of yourself but you choose not to. You’re a selfish bitch that I can’t stand anymore. I hate looking at you, I hate talking to you, and I hate everything about you.” He slammed the door loudly behind him and stormed out the front door.

  I didn’t chase after him because he was too upset to see reason. And I didn’t talk to Francesca either, unsure if she cared about anything he said. I grabbed my purse and prepared to walk through the front door when I heard Francesca crying from her bedroom.

  Not once had I heard her cry.

  I stood there and listened to it, feeling my heart break at the sound. My first instinct was to comfort her but I couldn’t get myself to do it. Maybe Axel finally got through to her, made her realize she needed to get out of bed and carry on.

  Maybe things would get better.

  ***

  It was dead slow that night.

  No one was stopping by because they were more interested in the new cupcake joint across the street. I couldn’t blame them. I’d take a cupcake over coffee a
ny day.

  My manager sent me home even though I had two hours left on my shift. It was nice to head home early, but I knew I would feel worse when I got my small check in two weeks. If Axel weren’t helping me I’d drown.

  When I pulled up to the house Axel’s car wasn’t there. I suspected he would stay at his apartment tonight because he was still pissed at Francesca. It was best if they both steered clear of each other, at least for a few days. Axel didn’t mean anything he said but the words were still hurtful.

  I walked in the house and noticed all the lights were off. She obviously hadn’t left her bedroom once that day. I tossed my purse on the kitchen table then flicked on all the lights. “Frankie?” I called down the hallway to see if she was all right.

  No response.

  “Frankie?” I walked down the hall and stopped when I noticed an arm laying across the floor. The rest of the body was on the bathroom floor hidden from view.

  What the fuck?

  “Frankie?” I ran to the bathroom and spotted her lying on the ground, her eyes closed and her breathing non-existent. She must have grown so weak that she tripped and fell.

  I kneeled and held her head in my hands. “Frankie, wake up.” I checked for blood but didn’t spot even a drop. When I felt the pulse of her neck I realized it was dangerously weak.

  What happened here?

  “Frankie?” I shook her violently, needing her to wake up.

  That’s when I spotted the bottle in her hands. The prescription label displayed my name and birthdate. Vicodin was written on the side.

  And it was empty.

  Shit.

  I pulled out my cell phone and stared at it blankly. “Shit, what’s the number to 9-1-1?” My hand shook as I tried to figure it out. Then it came to me in an instant. “Fuck.” I made the call and listened to the operator come on the line.

  “9-1-1. What’s your emergency?”

  “My friend needs help.”

  ***

  When I got to the hospital I wasn’t allowed to see her. I wasn’t even sure what the doctors were doing. I followed the ambulance in my car and didn’t arrive until minutes afterward. By the time I got there, they already rushed her off.

  This was the worst day of my life.