Safe With You

by DeMuzio, Kirsten

  Just like I did every day, I had followed her from Starbucks to her afternoon class, then to her therapist’s office and the library before heading back to her apartment. I didn’t know why she visited a therapist, and I hoped that nothing bad had happened in her life. When midnight rolled around and she was safely tucked away in her apartment for the night and her bedroom light was out, I made the short walk back to the apartment I shared with my partner. My employer owned several apartments around the city that were used by the employees, and the one we were staying in was close to her place. It was small but furnished nicely and was fine for two single guys.

  I quickly changed into workout clothes and headed down to the gym in the basement of the building. I needed to be exhausted by the time I went to bed if I had any hope of getting her out of my head and sleeping tonight.

  Sleep did come quickly when I finally got to bed, but unlike every other night since my brother’s death, I slept peacefully until the sun rose. While I waited for my partner to finish up in the shower and head out for his morning surveillance, I sat on the edge of my bed with my head in my hands. If you had told me yesterday that I would be upset by the absence of nightmares, I would have said you were fucking crazy. But this morning I would have given anything to have the nightmares back, instead of the sweet dreams of her that had given me my best night of sleep in over a year.

  ***

  Wyatt was still reclining against the headboard, and I shifted so I was straddling him. “You dreamt of me?” He swept my hair behind my shoulders and pulled me down to kiss me deeply, murmuring against my mouth, “Every night.” I sighed and wrapped my arms around his neck and rested my head on his shoulder, “Keep going.”

  ***

  I got to Starbucks well before she would arrive at 3:30. I needed some time to think before I saw her today. Not that there was anything left to think about since she hadn’t left my mind since she walked out of here yesterday. I had spent the morning jogging around the city, trying to push away the thoughts of her that kept creeping into my mind. For the first time in over a year, I actually felt alive. And that feeling only came when she was near. Why did the one person who could pull me out of the darkness have to be the one girl I couldn’t have?

  Maybe I was finally losing it. After all my years in the Marines and everything I saw there, after losing my brother and with him my own will to live, after spending the last year just going through the motions. Maybe after all that, I was actually losing my mind. That was the only reason I could come up with for what I was about to do.

  ***

  “Was this the first day you waited for me with my coffee?” I asked, remembering his nervous smile when he asked if I would sit and talk with him. “Yup, that was one of the scariest things I’ve ever done.”

  ***

  When I arrived home that night, I still had a smile on my face from my conversation with her. She had seemed happy to sit and talk with me, and I sensed my attraction to her was reciprocated. In the back of my mind, I knew this was a very bad idea, but my memories of her beautiful smile and piercing light green eyes pushed those thoughts away – at least for the time being.

  I opened the door to the apartment and threw my keys down on the table. My partner was still up, lying on the couch watching ESPN. “Hey, man. Wanna beer?” I asked grabbing two from the fridge, not waiting for his answer. I popped the tops and handed one to him before crashing in the chair and putting my feet up on the coffee table.

  We watched an NFL update, drinking our beers in silence. When a commercial came on, he glanced over at me and said, “What are you doing, dude?” I raised my beer, “Uh, I’m drinking a beer and watching TV.” He shook his head, “You know what I mean. With the girl. We’re supposed to be following her from a distance, not trying to get in her pants.” I glared at him, not appreciating him talking about her like that. He took in my angry expression and sighed, “Shit, Hunt. I hope you know what you’re doing.”

  I leaned my head back and stared at the ceiling. I had no fucking clue what I was doing. All I knew was that I felt like a normal human being when she smiled at me, and I would do almost anything for that smile. I had crossed a line by initiating a friendship with her, and I wondered how many more lines I would cross. Because when it came to her, the rules went right out the window.

  ***

  The more he talked about what was going through his head during those first days, the more turned on I got. I returned to kissing his neck as he talked and my hips had a mind of their own as they slowly rocked against him. “Taryn,” he warned. “I’m not going to be able to finish this story if you keep doing that.” I brought my lips to his and swept my tongue over his before nipping his bottom lip. “Sorry, I’ll be good. Where were we?”

  “I was just talking about the day we made a date to run and I walked you to class.” I settled my head back down on his shoulder. “Oh, right.”

  ***

  When I left her on the steps of the building yesterday, I had to grit my teeth and physically force myself not to turn back and pull her into my arms. Being on her surveillance team was both a blessing and a curse. I loved that I could watch her and see her long hair blowing in the breeze and the concentration on her face when she studied, but it was torture to have to keep my distance everywhere except in Starbucks.

  During our conversation over coffee yesterday, her eyes had glazed over and she stared at me in a way she shouldn’t, because I couldn’t do anything about it. Yet, I found myself arranging a running date with her. For the last two weeks I had kept our relationship friendly within the safety of the walls of Starbucks. I found it so adorable that she wrote her name with her address, as if there could be anyone else on my mind.

  Then she had asked about my job, and I almost broke down and told her right then, but what did I do instead? I walked her to her class and nearly kissed her on the steps. My emotions were all over the place with her and I needed to get my mind off her for at least a couple of hours before I saw her again this afternoon.

  That’s how I found myself in the ring with a coworker at the gym that all of the employees had access to. He was backup on her detail – he didn’t do the day to day surveillance that my partner and I did, but he was available if the need arose for more security. He was a few years older than me, but he was also ex-military, so he was a worthy opponent in the ring. We circled each other before I made the first move, anxious to get some of my pent up energy out. After an hour of evenly matched sparring we both lay on our backs on the mat breathing hard. I hadn’t had a workout like that in a long time, and it felt good.

  Glancing over at the clock I saw I had enough time to get home and clean up before heading over to her place. Even though we were going to be running, I showered and put on clean clothes anyway. Ignoring the voice in my head screaming warnings at me, I threw some extra clothes in a duffel bag – just in case we decided to grab some dinner after our run.

  When she opened the door wearing that sorry excuse for workout clothing my first instinct was to throw her over my shoulder and take her into her bedroom. My second instinct was to demand she put on a different outfit so nobody else looked at her while we were running. Since neither of those were viable options, I shut my mouth and tried to play it cool. That coolness was tested again when she started stretching before our run. Her legs were already on my mind almost every second of the day, and now that I knew how flexible she was, I was a goner. And the whole deal with her dragging the water bottle down her neck almost had me throwing her over my shoulder again.

  The phone call from her dad while I was with her had been my call back to reality. This wasn’t a relationship, she wasn’t my girlfriend, she was the daughter of a Senator who had essentially hired me to keep her safe. I had to back off, no matter how much it went against every instinct in my body.

  On Monday afternoon I stayed outside of Starbucks, not sure if it would be better to just disappear from her life. I watched her hurry down the sidewalk and take
a deep breath before swinging the door open. From where I was standing I could see her through the window, and the way her face fell when she saw our empty table nearly brought me to my knees.

  It was my fault she was hurt. My fault she had feelings for me that I couldn’t reciprocate. But I wasn’t strong enough to watch her be hurt, so before I knew what was happening, I walked into the store and came to stand behind her just as she was ordering. She whirled around and the tremendous relief I saw in her eyes was overwhelming. We fell back into our easy friendly conversations the rest of that week and the next, although I didn’t walk her to class again.

  On Friday afternoon of our fourth week of coffee dates she told me of her plans to go to the Hamptons when her exams were over. I nodded, “The Hamptons, huh?” I rubbed the back of my neck in what was a nervous habit and stood up, pulling my phone out of my pocket. “Will you excuse for a minute? I need to make a quick call.”

  “Sure,” she replied. This was the first I had heard of her trip to the Hamptons, although it wasn’t unusual to find out these things last minute in my line of work. I placed a call to my boss to get an update, and he informed me then that my partner and I would be accompanying the girls on their trip. Apparently her parents would be in town on Tuesday morning to fill her in on the security situation.

  I knew I had to tell her before then. She needed to hear it from me, and I needed the chance to explain myself to her. I just hoped she would listen. I glanced over at her through the window, and she smiled at me, her eyes practically sparkling. She wore her hair loose today and I ached to run my hands through the long silky strands. She wore a simple white t-shirt that hugged her curves and black shorts that showed off her amazingly long legs. I shouldn’t be looking at her legs. I shouldn’t be imagining them wrapped around me.

  ***

  I squeezed my thighs on either side of his hips, “I didn’t know you loved my legs so much.” He gripped my upper thighs. “Well, I guess I need to make more of an effort to show you just how much I love every inch of your body,” he said as his hands moved to cup my ass.

  “Not yet, you still have a story to tell.”

  “Mmmm hmmm, let’s jump ahead to the night you invited me to Roxy’s.”

  ***

  She was serious about studying – she didn’t leave her apartment all weekend. I gave her my phone number, because I wanted her to be able to contact me if she needed anything or just wanted to talk. I hadn’t taken her number, because I didn’t trust myself not to call her. It was late on Sunday night and my partner and I were grabbing a couple of beers in a bar just down the street from our place. He hadn’t said anything else to me about her, but I could tell by the way he was frowning at me that he wouldn’t be holding his tongue much longer.

  “Just say it, dude.”

  “So, you got the word we’re headed to the Hamptons on Tuesday, right?” I nodded.

  “Are you going to tell her who you are before then, because it’s gonna be kind of obvious after that.” I clenched my jaw, “Yeah, I’ll make sure I talk to her tomorrow…after her exams.” He studied me a moment.

  “Look, man. You’ve been like the walking dead for the last year… until we started this assignment. I assume she’s the reason you’re back among the living.” I didn’t answer him, and he took that as affirmation.

  “I hope this ends well for you, Hunt. I’m not sure how that’s possible, but I hope it does.” Before I could dwell on that thought any longer, my phone beeped signaling an incoming text message. When I saw it was from her, I left the table and went outside. I didn’t need him analyzing me while I talked to her.

  I took a deep breath and debated what to do. My self control crumbled just like it always did where she was concerned, and I asked if I could call her. There was no response for a couple of minutes, and I paced the sidewalk staring at my phone. I resorted to begging to hear her voice. This time her response was almost immediate. A second later I heard her phone ringing in my ear.

  After our brief conversation I slipped my phone back in my pocket and sat down on a bench with my head in my hands. I needed to tell her the truth – that I was hired by her father to keep her safe. No. I needed to go back in time and never talk to her. But just the thought of never talking to her or touching her had my chest constricting painfully. I needed to see her and talk to her and touch her. That was the only time I felt alive again. Now that I’d had a taste of that, of her, I couldn’t let that go.

  My partner and I were already at the club when she walked in with her cousin. Normally we took separate shifts, but with her going to a crowded club, it was smarter for us both to be there. Just in case. From my spot in the rear of the club, I had a direct eye line to the front door, and I saw her the instant she walked in.

  She looked amazing – more dressed up than I had ever seen her. Her skirt was short, and her legs looked a mile long. God. Those legs would be my downfall. I held myself back from going over to her right away and watched while she chatted with friends and finally settled at the bar. My partner laughed and slapped a hand on my back.

  “Uh, Hunt. You’ve got a little drool … right there,” he said motioning to the corner of my mouth. I rolled my eyes and threw an elbow into his gut, causing him to double over and choke on his laugh. When he recovered he became serious, “You’re going to tell her, right? I don’t want to be part of a huge scene tomorrow morning when she finds out who you are and her dad kicks both of our asses.”

  I knew he was right, and I did plan on telling her tonight; however, right now I was distracted. My eyes were on her when her ex-boyfriend walked in, so I saw her reaction to him instead of actually seeing him. Her eyes widened with slight panic and she was looking around like she wanted to run. What I really wanted to do was break the bastard’s nose, but I beat him to her and pulled her out to dance instead.

  Our departure for the Hampton’s tomorrow was weighing heavily on my mind just a moment ago, but my mind was blank right now with her in my arms. Her heels were high, making her just a few inches shorter than my 6’3”, and when she rested her head against my neck I had to remember we were in a public place. She smelled amazing and I wanted to stay here like this all night, but the song ended and I had to step back before I wasn’t able to.

  ***

  “We all know what happened then,” I said.

  “Yeah, all hell broke loose.” His hands were all over my back to my ass and down my legs.

  “Keep going, I want to hear what happened after I was whisked away by my bodyguard.”

  ***

  I paced back and forth through the foyer with my hands on my head. Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! I should have told her. I had a million chances and I always found an excuse why it wasn’t the right time. When she realized the truth and let go of my hand it felt like the wind had been knocked out of me. The betrayal I saw in her eyes nearly brought me to my knees. I don’t know how the hell it happened but sometime during the last month I had fallen in love with her. And now I might have just lost her.

  I was still standing in the foyer a while later trying not to put a hole through the wall when my partner returned with her cousin and another one of our security team. My partner clapped his hand on my shoulder in a sympathetic gesture, and her cousin gave me a look that clearly said ‘Dude, you fucked up big time’. Yeah, I already knew that.

  I knew she wouldn’t want to talk to me, but I had to take the chance when she went in to the kitchen. My partner just shook his head at my pathetic attempt when I followed her out of the room. When I returned just a few minutes later, he leaned back on the couch with his hands behind his head.

  “No luck?” I shook my head and went back to stand by the floor to ceiling windows looking out over the Manhattan skyline. “She said she didn’t hate me, but that’s a far cry from forgiveness.”

  “Do you think she’ll tell her dad?” I shrugged my shoulders, “I don’t know. That’s the least of my worries right now.” He scoffed at that, “Speak for yours
elf, man. I don’t want to get fired.”

  “You won’t, if it comes to that I won’t drag you down. I’ll take full responsibility.” He seemed satisfied with that and went to explore the apartment that was our new home for the time being. It was well after midnight by the time I felt tired enough to sleep. My room was right across the hall from hers and I stood outside her door for a long time before heading to bed.

  After years in the military my internal clock woke me up before 6:00 am, and I quickly showered and dressed. The smell of coffee and pancakes hit me when I walked into the hallway, noticing that her door was still closed. My partner was already in the kitchen charming the housekeeper into an extra helping of pancakes. “Oh, hello. You must be Wyatt. I am the family’s housekeeper for 20 years.” I smiled and held out my hand, but the short older woman with white hair pulled me into a surprisingly strong hug. “This handsome fellow here tells me you’ve been taking care of our little girl.” My partner smirked at me over her head.

  “Uh, yeah. We’ve been making sure she’s safe.” She patted my arm affectionately. “Good. Good. She is like my granddaughter. She was such a scared little thing when her parents brought her home. But now…now, she is a beautiful young woman. A bit too skinny though.” She made a tsk tsk sound, and then shooed me to the dining room with a huge plate of pancakes.

  My partner had grabbed the newspaper and had just unrolled it when I walked into the room. His mouth dropped open when he saw the front page. “Oh, shit dude.”

  Her reaction to our provocative picture in the paper this morning was not at all what I expected. When I saw that picture I thought for sure we were over. But she laughed at it. After climbing over the table to get it. I have to admit that was pretty hot. Now she was lying on the massage table with some guy’s hands all over her body. I’m pretty sure he’s gay, but still, I don’t like anyone else touching her.