Marriage at His Convenience

by Jacqueline Baird

  Five minutes of listening to all the city and family gossip cheered her up.

  ‘We had visitors at the weekend—your friend Clive.’ Her father chuckled.

  ‘Clive?’ Amber responded in surprise.

  ‘Yes, he wanted to know if you will be back for your birthday next week.’

  ‘Not next week, but I will be back soon.’ Amber didn’t see Lucas standing at the open door of her study or the murderous expression on his face as he turned and left. A few minutes later she concluded the conversation.

  Turning back to the computer, she tried to work. The mood Lucas was in there was no point in joining him, she thought acidly.

  ‘Are you busy?’ The man occupying her thoughts walked into the room.

  Amber swung around on her chair. ‘Not if you can think of something better to do,’ she teased with determined cheerfulness. He was wearing a beige linen suit, and the desperate thought occurred to her that, if she got him almost naked in the pool, perhaps they could get back to the way they had been. ‘It’s so hot I thought I might go for a swim.’ Rising to her feet, she walked towards him.

  ‘Don’t let me stop you,’ he said bitingly. Her golden gaze winged to his and she froze at the contempt she saw in his black eyes.

  ‘I thought you might join me,’ she said quietly.

  His mouth twisted into a mockery of a smile. ‘Sorry, but I have to go to Athens after all, something has come up.’

  ‘I thought the helicopter—’

  ‘It is repaired,’ he said, cutting her off. Anger gleamed cold as ice in the darkness of his eyes, but there was reluctant desire too, and it was the desire she responded to when he pulled her into his arms and kissed her with a fierce, possessive passion. Then just as fiercely he put her away from him.

  ‘I won’t be back until Saturday. If you need anything, call me—Tomso has the number.’ He strode out of the room.

  What she needed he could not give her, she realised with a despairing sigh, the sound lost in the whirring sound of the helicopter arriving. He had not even said goodbye.

  Amber watched from the window as the helicopter rose in the air and vanished. It was happening all over again— Lucas running out on her. The truly sad part was, Amber realised stoically, she wasn’t even surprised she had no faith in him. She’d been expecting it.

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  AFTER spending the night alone, Amber was nowhere near as stoic. She missed Lucas desperately. She had not slept. She couldn’t work, and finally mid-morning she decided to walk down to the pier. Tomso waved her into the bar and over a cup of coffee he rhapsodised in fractured English over Lucas and their marriage, informing her they had never seen Lucas so happy, and if anyone deserved to be happy he did after the terrible loneliness of the past few years.

  Amber presumed Tomso meant the deaths of all Lucas’s family members and it made her think. She had acquired a whole new family that had taken her into their home and hearts while Lucas had lost his. His grief must have been horrendous. Strolling back along the beach, she sat down on the hot sand and took a long, hard look at herself, and was not impressed at what she saw.

  She claimed she loved Lucas, but she was too proud and too frightened of being hurt to tell him. But she was hurting now anyway. If she truly loved him, and she did, she should be declaring it from the rooftops, not hiding it as though it were something shameful. Was she really so lacking in courage?

  As for Lucas, he had an inherent need to be in control at all times. He was a dynamic, arrogant man, but not a man to talk about his feelings or show them. He was a loner; he withdrew behind a cool, aloof mask at the least sign of challenge to his real emotions. Yet when they made love Amber was almost sure he was as overwhelmed as she was, but far too proud to admit it. But then so was she…

  Lucas had hinted she stay with him and have his child. Perhaps that was as near as he could get to admitting he wanted her every way a man wanted a woman, and not just as the sex object he had once labelled her. Christina was dead, and Amber was pretty certain there was no other woman in his life. Dared she take a chance and tell him how she felt? Was she strong enough to cope if he rejected her love? The answer to both questions was yes.

  The bible said, ‘hope deferred maketh the heart sick,’ and it was happening to her. Surely it was better to know the truth one way or the other and get on with her life? And, with that thought in mind, she had made her decision.

  The following morning Amber dressed with care in one of her Milan purchases. A sleek white linen dress, with a slightly scooped neckline, buttoned from top to bottom and skimming her slender body from shoulder to mid-thigh, with a matching fabric high-heeled sandals and shoulder-bag to complete the outfit. Her long hair was swept up in a twist on top of her head, and even in the late summer heat she looked coolly sophisticated. She had talked Tomso into bringing her to the mainland by boat and he had also arranged the taxi to carry her to the tower block that housed the offices of Karadines International.

  Getting out of the taxi, she hitched her bag on her shoulder and took a step towards the entrance and froze. She blinked and blinked again. It couldn’t be—she was seeing things. The woman was dead…

  ‘Amber, it’s good to see you again. I was sorry to hear about Spiro, but I hear congratulations are in order, and, hey, Lucas isn’t a bad old stick. Even after our divorce he still looks after me, though he does not have to. We have just been to see him.’

  It was Christina, a slim, beautiful, positively glowing with life Christina, and obviously pregnant, accompanied by a very handsome young man whom she proudly introduced as her husband with love shining in her dark eyes.

  The blood drained from Amber’s face. She was pole-axed. She said something and it must have been okay, because a few minutes later she was standing on her own, her dazed eyes watching Christina and her husband walk down the street.

  ‘Hi, Amber.’ She vaguely heard her name and turned her head; it was Joe. ‘Are you okay? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.’

  ‘Maybe I have,’ she said without thinking in her shocked state, her stomach twisted with nausea and sweat dampening her smooth brow.

  ‘Funny! I’m glad to see you haven’t lost your sense of humour. Lucas has been acting like a bear with a sore head for the last two days. For the sake of his poor beleaguered workforce, try and cheer him up, will you? You are going up to see him?

  ‘Oh, yes.’ See him! She was going to kill him… Lucas had lied…

  ‘Come. I’ll show you to his private lift.’ With Joe leading the way, Amber stalked into the Karadines building. Joe ushered her into the small lift.

  ‘It opens into his private office suite. I’ll probably catch you later,’ Joe said with a grin as the doors swished shut.

  Amber sank back against the wall, her mind a mass of teeming emotional pain, humiliation, sheer disbelief. It was a horrible thought, but until now she had not realised how much she had counted on Christina being finally out of his life to win Lucas’s love. Tim had told her to take a chance, but she had never had one… Lucas had told her his wife was dead. It was a lie of such magnitude no one with any sense of morality could forgive it. Not only was Christina alive and well, but she had divorced Lucas and married a gorgeous young man and was pregnant. But Lucas was still looking after her.

  With blinding clarity Amber saw it all. It must have been a hell of a jolt to Lucas’s colossal ego to be rejected by the woman he loved, the woman who had lost his child, and then to see Christina happily married and pregnant again.

  Amber had felt sympathy for him and had hoped that once the grieving was past he would fall in love with her. Only last night she’d decided to tell him how much she loved him, and all the time the swine had lied to her. His request she have his baby took a much more sinister turn in the light of Christina’s pregnancy. Lucas hated to lose at anything. If his ex-wife could have another child, then so could he. Lucas didn’t care about her, Amber realised. She was obviously a convenient pawn to be
used in the competition with his ex-wife, and Spiro’s legacy was an added bonus.

  Amber had been second best once in Lucas’s life and she was damned if she would be again. She didn’t need the lying, conniving pig, and she was about to tell him so. By the time the lift stopped Amber’s overriding emotion was murderous rage.

  Her golden eyes leaping with fury, she strode out of the lift, and on past a stunned-looking secretary who cried, ‘You can’t go in there,’ as Amber thrust wide the door of Lucas’s office, and slammed it shut behind her.

  The object of her fury was sitting behind a large desk. His head shot up as the door slammed, his black brows arching enquiringly, and not a flicker of emotion disturbed his hard-cut handsome features. ‘Amber, to what do I owe this honour?’

  ‘Honour, honour!’ she screeched, striding across to the desk and planting her hands flat on it. ‘You don’t know the meaning of the word, you devious, lying bastard.’

  ‘Be careful what you say, Amber.’ Lucas shoved back his seat and stood up, moving around the desk. ‘A Greek will not allow anyone to cast a slur on his honour. Even you, my beautiful virago,’ he drawled mockingly, but with a hint of steel in his tone.

  ‘How could you?’ she demanded wildly. ‘How could you tell me Christina was dead? What kind of sick joke was that? You want to get down on your knees and pray for your immortal soul or you will surely go to hell.’ She was in full flood now. Her golden gaze clashed with his. ‘The night before our wedding Tim convinced me to take a chance on you growing to love me. After all, you were a man with a man’s need and your first wife was dead. So I did.’ Amber didn’t see the brilliant flare of triumph in Lucas’s eyes—she was on a roll. ‘The other night when you flung my pills from my hand…’ she accompanied the word with the gesture, knocking a desk lamp flying to the floor with a resounding crash, but even that did not stop her ‘…then you suggested I have your baby, I, idiot that I am, actually felt guilty for denying you. I spent all yesterday thinking how really you were a caring guy, but too shy to show your emotions!’ A hysterical laugh escaped her. ‘Shy! You don’t have any genuine emotions, only devious plans!’

  ‘Amber,’ Lucas slotted in, ‘you’ve got it all wrong.’ Reaching out, he grasped her upper arms.

  ‘No. I have finally got it right! After five long, miserable years I am over you. I actually came here today to tell you the opposite. What a joke! I got out of the taxi and, low and behold, risen from the dead on your doorstep I meet Christina, the woman you really love. God! How it must have dented your pride to have your young wife discard you. But I am through being a substitute for any woman.’

  ‘Shut up and listen to me.’ His hands tightened on her arms. ‘You’re screaming like a fish wife, and there is no need.’

  His eyes were black but there was fire in them that mirrored the violent emotion in her own. ‘Need. What would you know about need? Everything is sex and money to you,’ she retorted, trying to pull free, but his grip tightened.

  Suddenly aware of how close they were, she felt a trembling start deep in the pit of her stomach, and she stared at him in blazing, humiliating anger. ‘I am through listening to you,’ she said, feeling her hands clenching into fists at her sides. ‘I am leaving you. I never want to see you again. As for Spiro’s legacy, see my lawyer.’

  His mouth curled in a chilling smile. ‘Very convincing but don’t pretend you’re leaving on my account. I heard you yesterday on the telephone talking to Clive, telling him not next week but soon. Three nights without sex too long for you, Amber?’ he asked with biting sarcasm.

  Her hand flew out and slapped his face in blazing anger. His head jerked back and his eyes leaping with rage clashed with hers for a second, before he hauled her hard against him, his mouth crashing down on hers, kissing her with a raw, savage fury that left her with the taste of blood in her mouth.

  She tried to struggle, but he was too strong, and when he finally lifted his head she stared at him with bitter, pain-filled eyes, tears burning at the back of her throat because his last crack had told her his opinion of her had never changed. She froze in his arms and pride alone made her tell him the truth.

  ‘I spoke to my father yesterday. He mentioned Clive had visited him, and as a friend asked if I was coming back for my birthday. A friend that is all Clive has ever been. But you,’ she said, her lips trembling, ‘you never saw me as anything but an easy lay. You have the mind of a sewer rat.’ The tears she had restrained for so long filled her eyes; she blinked furiously, but one escaped down the soft curve of her cheek. ‘And I am leaving you.’ She tried to push him away, the tears falling faster now as the trauma of the last few days, few months, finally caught up with her and Lucas’s callous comment had been the last straw.

  ‘Oh, hell, Amber.’ Lucas groaned, hauling her tight against him. ‘Don’t cry. I can’t bear to hear you cry.’ With one strong hand he stroked her back, while his other hand lifted to her face and his fingers smoothed the wetness from her cheeks.

  She choked back a sob. ‘I am not crying,’ she murmured, but long shudders racked her slender frame.

  Suddenly the door opened, and Lucas turned his head and said something violently to his poor secretary, but the interruption gave Amber the strength to break free from him, and, rubbing the moisture from her face, she fought to regain her self-control. She was not shedding another tear over the fiend, and on shaky legs she stepped towards the door.

  ‘No, Amber. Please.’ Lucas swept her up in his arms. ‘You have had your say, now it is my turn.’

  ‘What do you think you’re doing? Put me down,’ she demanded hoarsely.

  ‘What I should have done years ago, but never had the guts,’ Lucas admitted and, sitting down on the sofa, he held her fast in the cradle of his arms. His face was only inches away from hers, and the black eyes caught hers with brilliant intensity.

  Even in her abject misery, to her horror, the scent, the heat of him invaded her senses, reawakening the familiar awareness she always felt in his presence. ‘Let me go, Lucas. Your secretary.’ She was grasping at any excuse; she had to get away.

  ‘No, I am going to keep you here until you hear me out,’ Lucas informed her bluntly. ‘Even a condemned man is allowed to speak.’ His features were harsh, brooding as he studied her tear-streaked face.

  She nodded—she did not trust herself to speak. Better to hear him out and get out, before she broke down completely in front of him.

  ‘Forgive me for what I said about three days without sex. I didn’t mean it. But to hear the mention of Clive’s name is enough to drive me insane with jealousy.’

  He was jealous, and it gave her hope.

  ‘But I believe you, I know you have to go back to London. You love your work, and I had every intention of taking you. I even got your father to purchase the old rectory for us in the village near his home. I thought we could split the year between Greece and England.’ And tilting her chin with one finger, he looked deep into her tear-washed eyes. ‘But I wanted it to be a surprise for your birthday.’

  Surprised! She was amazed. ‘You bought a house?’ she murmured. He had been planning for their future together, including her career.

  He nodded and continued. ‘But I don’t believe you meant what you said about Christina. Would you really wish her dead? Because that is what you implied.’

  ‘No, never.’ She found her voice. Horrified to think how callous she must have sounded. Then she remembered why she had behaved as she had. ‘But you lied.’

  ‘I never lied, Amber. That day in your office I told you my father had died, and Christina had gone the next year. Perhaps my grasp of English is at fault, but since when had gone meant the same as dead?’

  ‘Then why did you not tell me you were divorced?’ she demanded huskily.

  ‘What man wants to discuss the biggest mistake of his life,’ he said slowly, and she felt his muscular body lock with tension, ‘with the woman he loves?’

  She was held in his pr
otective arms, with the warmth of him surrounding her, and for him to suggest he loved her was the cruellest cut of all to her bruised heart. ‘Please, Lucas, no more lies: you loved Christina, you told me so. You probably still do,’ she said sadly.

  His dark eyes locked on hers as if they would see into her very soul. ‘No, I lied to you and myself, and I paid for it with the worst few years of my life.’ His dark eyes clouded with remembered pain. ‘It was my own fault, but the worst part is knowing in my arrogance I hurt you.’

  He brushed her lips with his in a bittersweet tenderness that squeezed her heart. This was Lucas as she had never seen him before. ‘I got over it,’ she muttered.

  ‘You should not have had to.’ He eased her off his lap onto the sofa beside him as if she were the most fragile Dresden doll, and placed an arm around her shoulders, holding her turned towards him. ‘I need to explain why I behaved the way I did.’ His dark eyes clouded with painful memories. ‘My mother was a stunningly beautiful woman.’ Amber could believe that. Just look at her son!

  ‘Men adored her. She had numerous affairs—her last one ended at her death of a drug overdose when I was thirteen.’ Amber gasped—she had not known that.

  ‘Yes, not very pleasant.’ Lucas’s lips twisted cynically. ‘Though the man we were living with at the time was quite good about it. He gave me a thousand drachmas, and told me I was big enough to look after myself and not to think of my mother as a drug addict because she wasn’t. She did not need to get high to be the sexiest lady around.’

  ‘It must have been hard for you.’ Amber was shocked, the image of Lucas as a young boy living such a life filled her soft heart with compassion.

  ‘I don’t want your pity, Amber,’ he said hardly. ‘I don’t deserve it because I let my mother colour my relationship with you. I didn’t see it at the time, but I realised it when it was too late.’

  Amber sat up a little straighter—this insight into Lucas’s character was so unexpected she could not help but be moved and she wanted to hear more.