Heartthrob

by Katie McCoy

  I went over to the set to meet Jax for lunch, but was waylaid by Morgan first.

  “Congrats!” she said, giving me an enormous hug. “We are so happy for you guys.”

  She seemed genuinely excited, and I was grateful for her support.

  “We might have done something for you,” Morgan told me as she steered me towards the craft table.

  It was a giant cake and dozens of bottles of champagne, and the entire cast and crew waiting to celebrate with us.

  “You guys!” I exclaimed, touched. “That’s so sweet.”

  “They just want an excuse to party,” Jax grinned, coming to join me. They poured us a glass, and Jax raised it in a toast.

  “Thank you,” he said. “It is such an honor to work with all of you, and Penny and I are so grateful that we get to share this important moment in our lives with all of you.”

  Everyone cheered, and then Morgan began pumping me for details.

  “So, I saw the pictures of the engagement,” she said, unusually giddy. “So sweet. So romantic. Did you know it was coming?” she asked me.

  “I might have suspected something,” I answered carefully. “But I wasn’t expecting it to be like that.”

  At least that was the truth.

  “Have you made any decisions yet?” Morgan wanted to know. “Are you going to live in New York or Los Angeles? Or London?”

  “Um . . .” I didn’t have an answer, but Morgan was happy to move on to the next in a long line of questions.

  “What about the wedding? Big wedding? Little wedding?”

  “Shotgun wedding?” Lulu interjected, a fake smile on her face.

  “Shut up, Lulu,” Morgan snapped at her. “Just because Jax wouldn’t touch you with a ten-foot pole doesn’t mean you get to be a bitch today.”

  Lulu went red and skulked away.

  Morgan turned back to me, her expression eager. “Have you at least thought about your dress?”

  I felt terrible lying to Morgan. She had been such a good friend, and I didn’t like deceiving her. I didn’t like deceiving anyone.

  “Hey.” Morgan’s face softened into a worried expression. “Are you OK?”

  I forced a smile. “Of course,” I reassured her. “Just a little overwhelmed, you know. It’s all so exciting!”

  She grinned at me. “You know I’m going to want to be a bridesmaid,” she told me.

  “Of course,” I agreed, feeling worse and worse about the lies I was telling her.

  For the first time, I realized, it wasn’t as simple as just slipping on a ring. This engagement was going to be big. And it had only just begun.

  I spent the whole day lying. And then, when I got back to the hotel, I had to lie to the people I loved the most. My parents and Mia. Both were understandably shocked, but my parents took it better than Mia did. They remembered Jax, and even though they had been surprised a few weeks ago when I told them I was going to London with him, they seemed to think the engagement was terribly romantic.

  “You deserve to be happy, sweetheart,” my dad said.

  “Are you insane?” was Mia’s reaction when I finally called her.

  “I thought you would be excited for me,” I protested guiltily. “You told me to take risks. I did, and look what happened.” I felt uncomfortable with every word. I hated throwing Mia’s words back in her face, especially when this whole thing was a lie.

  Just then, Jax came back from set. He gave me a questioning frown and gestured at my phone.

  “Mia,” I mouthed to him and he nodded.

  “I know it’s all happening fast,” I told Mia.

  “Fast?” Mia screeched. “This isn’t fast. This is lightning speed.” She took a deep breath. “I’m just concerned,” she said. “He’s Jax fricking Hawthorne. A movie star.”

  Suddenly Jax pulled the phone out of my hand.

  “A movie star that’s crazy about her.” He put Mia on speakerphone, though she had apparently been talking loud enough for Jax to hear. “Hi, Mia,” he said.

  “Jax,” she responded, not sounding very impressed. “I thought I told you that she was too good for you.”

  “Mia!” I gasped. “When did you tell him that?”

  “At the junket,” she told me. “And he clearly does not listen.”

  “I listen,” Jax said. “And I totally agree. Penny is too good for me. Which is why I’m the luckiest bloke in the whole world. She could do so much better and yet she’s agreed to marry me.”

  It was hard not to swoon at that, and I could tell Mia was swooning. Just a little.

  “I’ve got my eyes on you, Hawthorne,” she said, but her voice was softer.

  “I’d expect nothing less,” he responded.

  She hung up, and Jax tossed my phone on the bed.

  “I’m sorry, I know you hate lying to everyone,” he said, wrapping his arms around my waist. “Maybe I can talk to Stella, have her make an exception for Mia and your parents?”

  “No,” I sighed. “It’s too late for that. they’d just be hurt I didn’t tell them sooner.”

  Jax winced. “I guess we didn’t think this part through.”

  “I’m just getting used to it all,” I told him. “I don’t think I was prepared for it.”

  “It’s all going to work out,” he reassured me. “Trust me.”

  Then he kissed me and everything else just melted away. Because despite the lies stacking up, and all my guilt, it still felt like the first time whenever his lips met mine. The heat, the chemistry . . . it was intoxicating. I lost myself in the moment. All that mattered was me and Jax and his mind-bending kisses that went on and on and on.

  23

  Penny

  The following day, I set about the task of writing thank-you cards for the obscene amount of gifts that we had been given—and that continued to arrive. I had staked out a quiet spot by the duck pond, away from most of the action, when I was surprised by a familiar, yet unexpected visitor.

  Kira Hawthorne.

  I blinked, then scrambled to my feet as Jax’s mother came towards me.

  “Penny, my darling.” She grasped me by the shoulders and gave me two loud, smacking air kisses next to my ears.

  “Mrs. Hawthorne.” I was slightly dumbfounded by her arrival. We had not left on the best of terms, and I hadn’t expected to see either of Jax’s parents during the rest of our time in the UK.

  “Call me, Kira, please” she said, a million times friendlier than she had been at dinner a few nights before. She was actually smiling, though I could tell the Botox was making it a little difficult. Or maybe she just always had a strained look on her face.

  Then, I saw her glance down at my ring, and I realized exactly why she was here. She thought I was going to be her daughter-in-law. Had Jax called her or had she read it in the tabloids? Even though the whole charade still made me uncomfortable, I was cheered by the thought that the engagement might encourage Jax’s parents to actually connect with him. Nothing like a wedding to bring people together.

  I mentally slapped myself. There wasn’t going to be an actual wedding. This was just for the cameras. But maybe an engagement would be enough to start rebuilding bridges between Jax and his folks.

  “Did you come to see Jax work?” I asked, hopeful that Kira was reconsidering a lot of things regarding Jax.

  Her smile slipped, just for a second.

  “No, my dear,” she said, recovering it quickly. “I came to see you. To take you to lunch.”

  “Oh.” I could barely hide my surprise.

  “We barely got a chance to talk at dinner,” she reminded me, clearly choosing to avoid the reason why we had barely spoken at dinner. “And I want to get to know you better.”

  Even though I couldn’t help feeling a little suspicious of her reasoning, I also knew that everyone deserved a second chance. So I texted Jax that I was going to lunch with his mom, ignoring the shocked emoji face he sent as a response, and headed out with Kira.

  She took me to a c
ountry club. Or, as they called them in England, the local tennis club. I shouldn’t have been surprised, but I suspected that even if I had been prepared, I still would have felt out of place. Luckily, I was wearing one of the beautiful—and expensive—outfits that Jax had bought for me, but still, I could feel everyone’s eyes focused on me.

  We ordered, and then Kira focused her full attention on me.

  “So,” she said. “Let me see the ring.”

  Self-consciously, I held out my hand. I was still getting used to wearing it, but I had a hard time not staring at it constantly. I was seriously in love with how beautiful it was, while also trying not to be too in love with it because I knew that eventually I’d have to give it back. In fact, it was probably on loan from some fancy designer. The thought saddened me, but was exactly the kind of thing I needed to remember.

  The large, glittering diamond was an unusual shape—a large oval, but sitting sideways instead of vertically. It had a thin band, and the whole thing reminded me of something, but I couldn’t figure out what it was.

  Kira looked at the ring and made something like a cooing noise. “It’s beautiful,” she said, and I think she even meant it.

  “Thank you.” I pulled back my hand. “Jax really surprised me.”

  “Yes.” Kira took a sip of the champagne she had ordered. “He always did love surprises.”

  “Really?” I leaned forward a little. I hadn’t expected to hear stories of Jax’s childhood from Kira, but I was ready for them regardless.

  “Oh, yes.” Kira took another drink. “He was always surprising Peter and me with things he had written—little plays that he wanted to perform after dinner.”

  The thought of a young, excited Jax trying to put on a show for his cold, dispassionate parents saddened me. Jax had dealt with a lot of rejection from Kira and Peter, but he seemed to have used it to make himself stronger. And I knew that Jax wouldn’t make the same mistake with his own kids when the time came.

  I nearly choked on my drink. Jax and kids? I needed to get my thoughts and my hormones under control. Stat. I focused my attention back on Kira.

  “Have you two discussed the wedding?” Kira asked.

  I shook my head. “We’re still just enjoying being engaged,” I told her. “There’s no rush.”

  “Hmm.” She pursed her lips and gave me the once-over. “Well, neither of you are getting younger,” she said. “Might be best not to wait. You’re, what? Twenty-five already? Your fertility is peaking right now, and it’s only downhill from here.”

  My fork froze halfway to my mouth, but Kira just continued talking.

  “And have the two of you discussed where you’re going to live?” she asked.

  Morgan had asked the same question, and it was one that I had found myself thinking about as if it was something I actually had to worry about. If this was real—which I knew it wasn’t—but if it was, where would we live? Jax lived in Los Angeles, but he was often away on shoots, which could take place anywhere in the world. If I returned to New York and found a job, it was possible I’d only get to see him when he was in between movies.

  Not that it was something I had to be concerned with.

  “We haven’t decided yet,” I told Kira.

  “You know, Jax owns a flat in London,” she informed me. “Remarkably close to where his father works.”

  I stared at her. Was this really going where I thought it was going?

  “The two of you should go visit Peter in London one day,” she continued. “You’ll be able to see how much better it would be if Jax reconsidered his father’s offer. To take a job at his company.”

  “Jax already has a job,” I told her, bemused. Was she seriously suggesting that taking a junior executive job at some stockbrokerage was better than being an award-winning, world-famous actor?

  Kira ignored me. “It really would be better for both of you. Force Jax to grow up and settle down. It would be for his own good, really.”

  “He’s not interested,” I said, louder this time.

  Loud enough for people at the table next to us to look over and share a disapproving glance. Kira glared at me, but stopped talking.

  We ate our lunch quietly for a while.

  “Don’t expect fidelity,” Kira said abruptly.

  I glanced up at her. She kept her eyes on her salad, which she was pushing around her plate but not eating.

  “Jax wouldn’t cheat on me,” I told her, but my voice was gentle. That was one thing I knew for sure.

  Kira smiled— a little smile at the corner of her mouth. It wasn’t a nice smile. It was a sad one.

  “They can’t help it,” she said, still not looking at me. “And Jax is so like his father.”

  “Jax is nothing like his father,” I murmured.

  “All men are the same,” Kira argued. “I’m just saying that you shouldn’t expect them not to want to have a little fun once in a while. Boys will be boys,” she said with a wave of her hand.

  “That’s not like Jax at all,” I told her. “He is kind and caring and thoughtful and he would never do anything to hurt me.”

  Kira looked at me, and I realized that I was talking about a relationship that wasn’t even real. Kira and Peter’s marriage wasn’t a good one, but at least it was genuine. Who was I to comment on marriage and commitment and fidelity?

  “You underestimate your son,” I said firmly.

  Kira snorted. “I see, you’re just like all the other fans.”

  “No,” I said, losing my temper finally. “I know him, and he’s worth far more than you will ever see.”

  I pushed back my chair. “I hate to make a habit of leaving a good meal behind, but I think this lunch is over.”

  And for the second time running, I walked out on her.

  24

  Jax

  I woke up with Penny in my arms, and I knew today was going to be a good day. In fact, every day since Penny had re-entered my life had been better—because she was in it. She was smart, talented, sweet but tough, encouraging but didn’t let me get away with shit—and on top of all of that, she was fucking gorgeous.

  And right now, she had my ring on her finger. So what if it wasn’t strictly genuine? Right now, the swell of pride in my chest felt real enough . . . as well as the swelling elsewhere.

  She let out a soft sigh and snuggled up closer to me. My body stirred in response—how could it not? I wrapped my arms around her, pressing against her perfect ass and dropping kisses along her shoulder.

  Even though I was turned on, though, I wasn’t really focused on sex at the moment. I was just interested in being closer to her. In curling around her.

  Worshipping her.

  “Good morning,” I whispered.

  She turned in my arms, her eyes sleepy.

  “Good morning.” She smiled, leaning in and kissing me.

  Damn, that was the way to wake up.

  I lost myself in the kiss—in her touch and scent. Rolling onto my back, I brought her with me, tucking her under my arm and trapping her hand between my palm and my chest. Looking down, I saw her engagement ring sparkling there on her third finger.

  Even though I knew it was for show, I still liked the way it looked on her.

  “Do you like it?” I asked her, realizing we hadn’t really spoken about the details of the engagement since it had happened.

  Penny held up her hand, the diamond sparkling in the sunlight that streamed into the room.

  “I love it,” she said, her voice still sleepy and a little dreamy as well.

  “It’s inspired by a ring that Jane Austen used to wear,” I told her. “The original is made from turquoise, but I thought I’d go a little more traditional.”

  Penny shifted onto her side to face me. “You picked the ring?” she asked, looking surprised.

  I nodded. “I wanted to make sure it was something you would like.” I paused. “Where did you think it came from?”

  Penny blushed a little. “I guess I assumed St
ella had been in charge of everything.”

  My alarm buzzed.

  I groaned and rolled over to shut it off. Usually I was excited to go to set, but for some reason, today I just wanted to spend the day with Penny. In bed.

  Clothing optional.

  “Can’t we just stay here?” Penny yawned, echoing my thoughts.

  “I wish. But I’m shooting with Olivia today, just the two of us. I’m guessing people would miss if Darcy wasn’t there to sweep Elizabeth off her feet.”

  “You mean, annoy her with his arrogance and snooty charm,” Penny countered with a grin.

  I laughed. It was cool that she knew the book—and script—so well. She’d helped me run lines in our downtime and given me advice on the emotions behind the lines. And seeing how excited she was about the production made me feel optimistic about the chances of success down the line. If a die-hard fan like Penny was satisfied, then we wouldn’t be trampling on any Austen-loving toes with our version.

  “Want to come watch the scene?” I asked hopefully.

  “Maybe later.” Penny smiled back. “I still have a bunch of thank yous to send out.”

  “You don’t have to bother with that stuff,” I told her. “Stella can take care of it.”

  But Penny shook her head. “People are being so nice, I want to return the kindness.”

  Of course she did. I gave her a kiss before heading to the shower. I had a feeling that she would be going right back to sleep before those notes. Not that I could blame her—I had kept her up last night. Just as she was keeping me up right now—my cock still wishing we were in bed with her.

  I wanted to crawl back in, to pin her to the bed and have my wicked, wicked way with her. But I took a cold shower instead, knowing that at the very least denying myself this release would give my lines as Darcy—a man practically brimming over with sexual frustration—extra weight.

  It seemed to work, because Declan was especially effusive with my performance. He cornered me after we wrapped, not only to congratulate me on the work, but also about the engagement.