Good News, Bad News

by Maggie Groff

  ‘He could have. Why wouldn’t he?’

  ‘Because cash is a liquid asset, and I can’t imagine anyone in business willingly parting with a liquid asset in exchange for a cheque that would have to go through their accounts and would be liable to attract income tax.’

  She had a point and it was something I hadn’t considered. Actually, it was a hugely relevant point.

  ‘There is another explanation,’ Harper went on.

  ‘Which is?’

  ‘He could have bought two yachts.’ She said it so casually that the enormity of this possibility didn’t hit me immediately. This scenario had never been on my radar at all, yet it was a perfectly feasible explanation. And O’Leary could have sailed off in the second yacht.

  I grinned at Harper. ‘Well done, you.’

  ‘I have my moments,’ she said proudly.

  Chapter 24

  Saturday morning I was in the study noting information from the coroner’s report onto the whiteboard and Harper was in the bathroom throwing up. Chairman Meow was sitting outside the bathroom door with his head cocked to one side. He didn’t look impressed by the sound effects.

  While Harper was otherwise occupied I called Daisy to ask if she had anything to report yet.

  ‘Nothing relevant, I’m afraid,’ she admitted with a sigh. ‘Andrew didn’t emerge from the hospital until after six, and then he went straight to the old nurses quarters. I waited another hour, which would have given him time to shower and change, but he didn’t reappear, so I came home.’

  ‘I hope you weren’t bored?’ I said.

  ‘Not at all. I listened to Radio National.’

  ‘Well, say when you’ve had enough.’

  ‘I will, don’t worry. I’m selling produce at a market this morning, but I’ll be back on the job late this afternoon. I figured Andrew might meet this woman tonight. What do you think? Should I get there about six?’

  ‘I think that’s a good time,’ I said truthfully.

  ‘If it is an affair, I can see how it happened,’ Daisy mused. ‘He’s a big, manly fellow.’

  ‘Yeah, but this sort of behaviour is out of character.’

  ‘It happens,’ she said dolefully.

  We chatted on for a bit about the markets and then, hearing the bathroom door open, I thanked Daisy for her help and rang off.

  Harper came into the study looking decidedly pale. ‘Have you got any crackers?’

  ‘Flat lemonade and dry toast worked for me.’

  ‘I’ll try anything.’

  She flopped heavily into the Windsor chair and I went to the kitchen to prepare the remedy. When I returned, Harper was staring out of the window at the street below, and Chairman Meow was sitting on the floor staring at Harper.

  ‘I could sit here and watch the goings-on all day,’ she said, taking the lemonade and toast. ‘I don’t know how you ever get any work done.’

  ‘I’m very disciplined,’ I said piously, and before sitting down I risked a quick glance outside to see if corduroy man was there, but he wasn’t.

  ‘Liar,’ Harper said, biting into the toast.

  Acknowledging her accusation with a brief smile, I asked, ‘When are you going to tell the boys and Mum and Dad?’ I avoided mentioning Andrew.

  ‘Not until I’ve had all the tests. Just in case.’

  Pleased that commonsense appeared to be underpinning her decision-making, I suggested, ‘Why don’t you go back to bed with a book?’

  ‘I can’t, I’m taking Fergus to soccer this morning.’ She glanced at the clock. ‘I’d better shower and go.’

  ‘Wait until you’ve finished eating,’ I ordered, annoyed by my sister’s compulsive need to always get on to the next thing. ‘Give that a chance to work.’

  Harper screwed up her nose at me, then looked down at Chairman Meow who was still staring intently at her.

  ‘What’s wrong with him? Does he want some toast?’

  ‘It’s not that,’ I told her. ‘You’re sitting in his chair.’

  ‘Well pardon my snow-white arse,’ Harper said, and I laughed. She was feeling better already.

  After a shower and more toast Harper headed home looking accidentally stylish in a pair of my old Levis and her white shirt. It had not escaped my notice that neither of us had mentioned Toby was coming home today. I knew Harper had sensed a few days ago that I was ambivalent about his return, and I was thankful she hadn’t raised the subject again.

  As soon as I heard the front door shut I went online to look for further media response to our GKI mission, and I wasn’t disappointed. Two Queensland newspapers had good coverage, complete with photographs.

  The headlines were brilliant—YARN BOMBERS PULL WOOL OVER BANKS’ EYES and IT’S CURTAINS FOR MAJOR BANKS!

  I called Sam and told him about the articles and that his mother was on her way home to take Fergus to soccer. Then I sent a text message to the other GKI members, printed out the articles, unlocked the blue steamer trunk and filed the papers in the ‘Media Response’ folder.

  My living room was a mess and I was gripped by a sudden urge to clean, an activity I suspected was more influenced by a vain desire to impress Toby’s friends than Toby. The second I pulled the vacuum cleaner out of the hall cupboard, the phone rang. Saved by the bell, literally.

  It was Harper.

  ‘What’s wrong?’ My immediate thought was that she’d been sick in her car.

  ‘Nothing,’ she said brightly. ‘I’m just calling to let you know that you have an appointment with Rainbow this morning at ten. It’s not negotiable and it’s already paid for so you have to go. I’ve booked you in for a wash, trim and highlights, a facial and a hot-rock massage.’ Then she rang off.

  Grinning like a fool, I shoved the vacuum cleaner back in the cupboard.

  Chapter 25

  Four o’clock came and went with no sign of Toby or his friends.

  Apart from a bad case of the jitters, I was as ready as I’d ever be. Rainbow had worked her magic and buffed me to cosmic radiance, and for moral support I was wearing Harper’s dark-green moleskin pants that she’d left behind. I’d completed the outfit with a cream loose-knit cotton sweater, a floral Liberty scarf and my black Bally flats.

  Maybe I was too dressed up?

  I checked in the mirror.

  No, on the outside I was fine. It was my insides that were in turmoil.

  How would I feel when I saw Toby? How would I react when he kissed me? And what sort of kiss might it be?

  Jeepers, I was carrying on like a neurotic goose. The possibility of a passionate kiss probably wouldn’t even arise if Barney and Sonya were with Toby. At least, I sincerely hoped it wouldn’t.

  At 5 pm I assumed that their flight had been delayed and checked my phone, but there were no messages. For something to do, I set about tidying my desk.

  I took the photograph of Toby out of the drawer and put it on the desk next to the monitor. Then I put it back in the drawer. Then I took it out again and stared at his face.

  It was a strong, patrician face, and the handsome lines and curves of it were so familiar to me. In the past, I’d always been able to imagine subtle changes in the photograph, as if Toby was smiling at me, but I couldn’t today.

  Once again, I returned the photo to the drawer, and then I put my elbows on the desk, massaged my brow with my fingers and uttered a loud, anguished groan.

  Chairman Meow, who had been asleep on his Windsor chair, looked up and fixed his gooseberry-green eyes on me.

  ‘I feel sick,’ I told him.

  He yawned and then hopped across onto my lap and rubbed his head against the underside of my chin. I could feel his purring, like a rumbling engine deep inside his body.

  At 6 pm the sound of a key in the front door made us both jump. Chairman Meow leapt onto the floor and raced off to see who it was. I stood up, my throat tightened and I took several deep breaths to compose myself before walking out to the hallway.

  Toby and his companions, Barn
ey and Sonya, were already at the top of the stairs. Barney had his hands in his pockets and was jangling change. Sonya was holding Chairman Meow in her arms and stroking him. Toby, who was wearing the jeans and navy sweater that I’d given him for Christmas, was scratching Chairman Meow’s head. The familiarity of his clothes somehow added to my angst.

  ‘Hey,’ Toby said when he saw me, and he smiled awkwardly, almost as if he was astonished to see me, rather than pleased. Or was I reading too much into it?

  I smiled back, but the dryness in my mouth caused my top lip to stick unattractively to my teeth on one side. Fearing that it looked more like a sneer, I quickly covered my mouth with my hand. Unfortunately, I couldn’t suppress an accompanying blush. A puzzled frown on Toby’s forehead told me that he’d registered my unusual facial cameo.

  Tiredness from the long flight had done little to dull his striking features, but then I hadn’t expected it would. He always could go for lengthy periods without sleep. His thick fair hair was longer and wilder than when I’d last seen him, and he’d visibly lost weight. There was a new, raw, crescent-shaped scar on the side of his face that I had to consciously refrain from reaching out to touch.

  He stepped forward and hugged me and brushed my cheek with a kiss. The greeting was more friendly than amorous and, responding automatically, I hugged him back with genuine affection. It was as if I was welcoming home a friend, not a lover, and I was relieved that I felt none of the ardour I had on his previous homecomings.

  The hug over, Toby held me at arm’s length and inspected me. He raised a questioning eyebrow, as if something was awry, and I swallowed nervously.

  Oh, Lord. Did he already know about Rafe?

  ‘You’ve got your plait on the other side,’ he said finally, and nodded approval. ‘I like it.’

  Relieved, I tried not to think about my sweaty palms as Toby released me and formally introduced me to Barney and Sonya, and we shook hands.

  Sonya, who was still holding the Chairman, was, I guessed, in her early thirties, and was small and doll-like with big blonde hair, startling blue eyes and, to my mind, overly white teeth. She was wearing a tight pink cardigan, tight white jeans and high heels. Who, I couldn’t help thinking, travels in white jeans and high heels?

  Barney, who was more sensibly dressed in blue jeans, a plaid shirt and a grey sweater, was about forty, tall and fit-looking with receding dark hair and a pleasant smile.

  Both of them, Sonya explained grandly, were senior officers undertaking important work for an international aid organisation, and they had struck up a friendship with Toby while operating under perilous conditions in Kandahar Province, Afghanistan. Somehow she made it sound patronising, as though her life was way more worthwhile than mine. Mildly offended, I wished my phone would ring so I could pretend it was a conference call from the United Nations.

  Barney, I think, sensed my affront and said enthusiastically, ‘You’re so lucky, Scout, to live and work in such a beautiful place.’

  ‘Thank you,’ I replied warmly, and beamed triumphantly at Sonya. It was a childish reaction on my part, but I couldn’t help it. She was quickly working her way onto my annoying persons list.

  ‘Sorry we’re late,’ Toby said, although he didn’t sound as though he was. Gently he lifted Chairman Meow from Sonya’s arms and cradled him like a baby.

  ‘Oh, cute animal alert!’ Sonya gushed, and Toby grinned at her.

  ‘Our flight was delayed two hours,’ Barney explained.

  ‘I guessed,’ I said, smiling at him. ‘Would you like tea?’

  ‘Better not,’ Toby jumped in quickly. ‘We’re all tired and need a shower. I’ll drive Barney and Sonya over to their rooms at Sonnets.’

  ‘Rooms?’ I questioned without thinking.

  ‘Oh, we’re not together,’ Sonya trilled girlishly. ‘Barney’s wife is arriving from Adelaide tomorrow.’

  Embarrassed, I made an apologetic face at Barney. I had automatically assumed he and Sonya were a couple.

  ‘We’ll be eating at Botticellis in an hour if you want to join us,’ Toby said, passing Chairman Meow into my arms.

  If I want to join them? Wasn’t he going to come back after dropping them off?

  Flustered, I couldn’t think what to say.

  ‘In an hour then,’ Toby said when I didn’t reply, and he ushered his friends down the stairs.

  As I was showing them out, Toby turned around and gave my plait a little tug and said somewhat furtively, ‘We’ll talk later.’

  Oh, God. He knew.

  After I’d closed the front door, I leaned my head against it and sighed. I felt queasy and my stomach was churning. Why had he come to the apartment if he already knew? Or had he only suspected, and had somehow gleaned confirmation in my eyes when he’d scrutinised my face earlier? He couldn’t be that perceptive, could he?

  Pulling myself together, I fed Chairman Meow, tested my blood sugar level, administered my insulin and then forced myself to eat a salad sandwich and drink a glass of milk. Not only would it banish the queasiness, but I was also pretty sure that nerves would put the kibosh on my eating anything later.

  Of course, I knew that I had to go to the restaurant. It wouldn’t be right, I reasoned, to embarrass Toby in front of his friends by not turning up. It’s important to maintain standards, and I intended to be polite and friendly, and involve myself in their conversation in a mature way.

  It was a plan, and it sounded good to me.

  Botticellis is a fun Italian restaurant in Byron Bay that Miles cheekily refers to as Dirty Bottys.

  Tonight, it was packed and noisy, and Toby, Barney, Sonya and I were sitting at a table near the window, drinking cocktails. The men had ordered seafood platters, Sonya a pizza and I had settled for an entrée-size Caesar salad.

  From the beginning it was apparent to me that my plan was a fizzer and that I needn’t have bothered to turn up. Toby had given me a cursory smile when I’d arrived, but after that his attention had been focused on Barney and Sonya.

  It was also obvious that none of them had showered or changed, and I preferred to think that there had been a delay with Barney and Sonya accessing their rooms at Sonnets, rather than the more probable explanation that Toby had wanted to leave my apartment in a hurry.

  I consoled my hurt by telling myself that Toby, if he knew about Rafe, and I was pretty certain from his distant manner that he did, had to be feeling as uncomfortable as me, even if he wasn’t showing it.

  To my mind, there was a trifle too much hero-worshipping by Sonya of Toby’s brave occupation and, quite frankly, the adroit badinage between the three of them was making me sick. Barney had opinions on the heroin trade, Toby had opinions on tribal warfare and Sonya had opinions on opinions. To participate would have been punching above my weight, so I adopted an interested expression and remained silent.

  Watching Toby across the table, witnessing his confident bearing as he discussed world affairs, and his seemingly offhand acceptance that his life was a dangerous and alien existence to others, I knew without doubt that the admiration and feelings I’d once had for him had quietly died. And if I’d thought that seeing him again would rekindle the fire we’d once had, I’d been wrong. For me, I acknowledged with some relief, the flame had truly gone out. Had it, I wondered, also gone out for Toby? It would make things so much easier if it had.

  Right now, more than anything else in the world, I wanted to be with Rafe. How I wished he were sitting opposite me, grinning at my stupid jokes and sharing tasty morsels from my plate. After dinner, I thought dreamily, we would stroll around town for a while, looking in shop windows at things we couldn’t possibly afford, and then we would go back to my apartment and snuggle down and watch a cheesy cop show on television. Rafe would annoyingly point out all the mistakes in police procedure and, to shut him up, I would run my fingers through his thick dark curls and kiss him until neither of us could breathe. And in the morning, I reflected happily, we would play paper scissors rock to see w
ho would make the tea and who would get dressed and fetch the newspapers. I always lost, although I could never figure out how, and had to trot off to the newsagents.

  The sudden realisation that there was much more to my relationship with Rafe than sex hit me like a thunderbolt. And Lord knows this realisation had been a long time coming. Until now I’d been mentally labouring over a misguided belief that my emotional connections were with Toby and my physical ones were with Rafe. No wonder I’d been confused.

  A strange and welcome calm settled over me, and I knew with absolute certainty that, as soon as Toby and I were alone this evening, I would, in the kindest possible way, if there were such a thing, inform him that our relationship was over and that I was seeing Rafe.

  For a while I toyed with various expressions that might be preferable to the term ‘seeing Rafe’, but I couldn’t suppress images of past passionate bedroom scenes, so everything else I came up with was highly unsuitable. Oh dear. This was a plan that was much easier in the thinking than in the actual doing, but it had to be done. Tonight.

  Unaware of my personal eureka moment, my dinner companions were now discussing corruption within the powerful elite of several African countries, a subject about which I knew diddlysquat, so I continued to remain silent.

  As the evening progressed, I became increasingly aware that Sonya’s remarks about the poor, the uneducated and the desperate displayed an unhealthy elitist attitude that was unusual for an aid worker. She wasn’t just right of centre, she was toppling over the edge. A couple of times I saw Barney look startled by one of her comments, but no one challenged her. Not even me.

  By the time the gelatos arrived I’d had enough of her opinionated tosh. It was, I thought, time to inject the conversation with some meaningful political observations.

  ‘Don’t you think,’ I said loudly, ‘that Condoleezza Rice’s old hairstyle made her look like Lucy from the Peanuts cartoons?’ I put my elbows on the table, rested my chin in my hands, looked from one to the other of them and raised my eyebrows in anticipation of an answer.