Lucky Number Four

by Amanda Jason

  “Oh, it’sa my favorite people in the wholea wide world. How did you sneaka in here?” Papa’s loud voice makes me jump a little.

  Tears well up in my eyes as he leans down and kisses my cheek and hugs me. Then it’s Mama’s turn, and our table erupts in laughter as they tell us about the crazy customers they’ve had in lately. We order, and when the food arrives it smells delicious as always.

  My mouth waters, but as soon as I take a bite of perfectly made lasagna, my stomach rolls and I reach for the bottle of antacids in my bag. I bend down like I’ve lost my napkin and throw two in my mouth. I chew them quickly and then sit up to find three sets of eyes fixed on me.

  “Napkin fell,” I say, and they continue eating.

  It’s hard to pretend to eat. I finally give up and ask for a doggie bag, which makes Papa’s eyebrows rise. I’ve never needed a to-go bag in all the years I’ve been coming here. He looks at me suspiciously, but says nothing.

  “So, how’s Drew?” Trust Jeff to drop the bomb. Nobody has mentioned him, and we might have gone all evening without saying his name. Now I have two bones to pick with him, and it won’t be pleasant. Just the mention of his name makes me tear up a little.

  “He’s been working hard, and he’s really unhappy. We haven’t ever seen him this unhappy.” Liam states without looking in my direction.

  “Yeah, he’s really down, and he won’t let us in. He’s flying in from Milan tonight.” Colin does look at me. In fact, his eyes are glued to mine.

  “Sorry to hear that. Did he mention why?”

  Jeff, I swear—shut your mouth. But secretly I’m waiting for the answer, my nerves strung tightly.

  “We all know the reason. All he said was he has no idea what he did wrong. Everything was going well, and poof, you were gone.” I wish Colin would look at someone else.

  “Well, we should probably head out. Jeff and I have an early class tomorrow.”

  I get up quickly, and whoa, dizzy much? Jeff grabs my arm and steadies me so I don’t fall over. I say my quick goodbyes, and then push my way out of the restaurant, not waiting to see if Jeff is following. I’ll walk back to the apartment if I have to, but Jeff catches up with me at the front door and holds it open. We say nothing to each other as we make our way to the car. The silence between us continues until we’re in his living room. Jeff pushes me gently onto the couch and then plops down beside me.

  “Sounds like Drew isn’t very happy.” Jeff puts his arm around me so I can’t flee.

  “Maybe Angela dumped him,” I quip, and my heart skips a beat thinking it might be true.

  “Or maybe, like Liam and Colin suggested, it’s you he’s missing.” Jeff’s arm tightens around me. He’s good. He knows that if he wasn’t holding me, I’d flee to my room. “You’re going to sit here, and we’re going to discuss this. No excuses, not even if you throw up everywhere. It won’t deter me. Drew is miserable, and it’s because of you. Liam says he’s been like a zombie, and they’re worried about him. You need to talk to him and explain why you left like you did. You need to call him. He comes back tonight. You don’t have to tell him about the baby, but I think you need to talk, and tell him the truth. Think about it. Think hard. I think you’re wrong about him—hell, I know you are. He’s suffered for more than four months, and it’s time to tell him you love him and you want to be with him.”

  Jeff releases me, gets up and without another word, he goes into his room and shuts the door. That’s it. He tells me I love Drew and that’s it.

  Do I love Drew? That would explain why my heart felt shattered when I left him. Not to mention all the buckets of tears I’ve shed. Am I too late? Drew comes home tonight. Do I have the courage to call him? What if he doesn’t love me? What about our baby?

  Oh hell, it’s our baby. Not mine, but ours. Could we make it work? He’s famous and jets all over the world, and I’m a nobody with a psychic mother and a crazy family. I wonder if he’s home yet. I just have to call him to find out. But what do I say?

  Well, here goes nothing.

  I pluck my phone out of my back pocket and hit one on my phone. Yeah, I have him on speed dial under number one. Liam is number four. Yeah, I know I’m buying into his superstition.

  My stomach clenches. I feel sick. What if he sees an unknown number calling and doesn’t answer? It’s still ringing, and then I hear him say, “Hello.”

  “Hi, it’s me Dora. Drew, I need to talk to you…if you want to, that is.”

  He’s silent and I almost hang up. I fear he’ll say no and my heart will never, ever mend.

  “Yes, I think we do.” I feel relief. His deep husky voice makes me shiver.

  “When are you free? Maybe we could do lunch on Saturday?” I hope he says sooner. It’s only Tuesday, and I don’t think I can wait that long.

  “I’m coming over now,” he says firmly, and I want to do a happy dance, but I know my legs won’t support me. They’re like watery Jell-O. “Dora, are you there? Is that all right?”

  “Yes. Do you need directions?”

  “No, I’ve known where you’ve been since … well, we’ll discuss that once I get there.”

  “Be careful. See you soon.” I don’t know what else to say.

  “I will.”

  And then click, he’s gone. I stare at my phone. I can’t believe that just happened. He wants to see me. I’ve got to go do my hair and freshen up and change clothes. I scramble, as fast as my pregnant self will allow, to my room to get ready.

  It’s been an hour, and I’ve worn a path in the carpet. It should have only taken Drew fifteen minutes to get here. I keep looking outside. A light snow is falling. It’s April…it’s not supposed to snow in April.

  I let the curtain fall and take a seat on the couch for the millionth time—okay, not that many, but quite a few. My nerves are frayed. My mom says that all the time, but now I know what she means by it.

  I feel like this night will be the turning point in my life, and I hope it goes the way I want it to go. I want Drew—any way I can have him. Where in the hell did that that come from? I do want him? Oh, who am I fooling? Yeah, he might tire of me after a few months, but I’ll still have a part of him forever. I touch my stomach and feel the little bump that’s starting to show.

  “Where is your father?” I say to him or her.

  I hear a cell ringing and I glance at mine, but the ringing comes from another room, so it’s Jeff’s phone. I hear his muffled voice and then nothing. A feeling of dread like I’ve never felt before comes over me. I know a call this late at night isn’t good.

  His door opens. The first thing I notice is that he’s fully dressed and pulling on his jacket. His face is grim as he looks down at me. I know something really bad has happened, and I know it affects me.

  “Dora, I’m going to get your coat. That was Liam. We have to go to the hospital. Drew’s been in an accident.”

  My stomach rolls, and I don’t make it to the bathroom. Jeff rubs my forehead and holds back my hair as I dry heave into the kitchen sink. When I feel that I’m in control, he lets me go. I turn around as he brings me my coat. I’m numb. Jeff kisses me on the forehead, helps me with my coat, takes my arm, and leads me out of the apartment.

  The car is toasty, but I’m still shivering with a deep cold inside me. I’m praying that Drew is okay and he’ll smile at me when he sees me and we will live happily ever after, or until he gets sick of me.

  “It’s my fault. I called him and he said he would come right over. Oh, Jeff, what if he …” I can’t continue as uncontrollable sobs tear through me. Jeff grabs my hand tightly.

  “Stop it, Dora. Liam didn’t say, but we have to think positive. It’s not your fault. If anything, it’s mine. I made you call him.”

  He squeezes my hand, and I turn, trying to control my sobs. I see a tear roll down his cheek. If this is a nightmare, I want to wake up. Please don’t let this be real. With my free hand, I pinch myself and it’s real. It’s so fucking real.

  We ar
rive at the ER a few minutes later. The bright lights of the foyer sting my eyes, or it might be the salt from my tears. Jeff drops me at the front door and leaves to park the car. I immediately see Liam and Colin as I walk through the automatic doors. Again, my legs turn to rubber as I see the looks on their faces. They rush forward and both reach for me before I sink to the floor.

  Liam picks me up and moves to the waiting room, putting me down on an overstuffed sofa. He takes a seat beside me

  “How is he?” I whisper. Please, please let him be okay.

  “We don’t know. Nobody has come out to talk to us. We called his dad, his sister, Emily, and we tried reaching his mom, but she’s somewhere out of the country,” Colin answers, his face as white as a ghost.

  “It’s my fault. He was coming to see me,” I say, feeling numb and exhausted.

  “How is it your fault? He was like a little kid after he got off the phone. He …” Liam chokes up and I pat his hand and lean into him, closing my eyes and letting the beat of his heart try to soothe me.

  “How is he?” Jeff’s voice sounds close, but I have no energy to look at or answer him. I hear Colin mumble a few words and then nothing but Liam’s heart beating and an annoying TV that’s blaring from somewhere close by.

  An hour later, Drew’s father joins us, looking worried. He worry turns to anger when Colin tells him we haven’t been told anything. He storms off. I let Liam’s heartbeat take me away again. I must have fallen asleep, because when I open my eyes, Emily is there, and so are a bunch of people I’ve met and some I’ve only seen in magazines.

  Liam explains the late-night news had reported the accident, and people just started showing up. The agency also sent over private security to keep the press at bay. And there is still no news on Drew’s condition.

  Emily sees me talking to Liam and comes over, making Jeff move so she can sit beside me. Her face is tear-streaked. She grabs my free hand and draws me into a hug. My stomach starts tumbling, and I stand up quickly. Jeff is right there, guiding me away from the crowd and into a secluded hallway. I want to see Drew. I have to see Drew.

  “Jeff, I have to see Drew. Please help me. I can’t stand not knowing if he’s okay.” I cling to him and he pats my back and then seats me in a chair that he grabs from an open empty room.

  “I’ll be right back,” Jeff assures me, and I let my head fall into my hands. I hear him on the phone, and then he’s back with a slight smile on his face.

  “What did you do?”

  “I called my dad. He’s calling the CEO of this hospital. In a few minutes, we should have some action. Let’s go back to the waiting room. I know it’s crowded, but they need to be able to find us.”

  The room is just how we left it, except everyone is silent. A harried-looking man in a long white coat with a stethoscope slung around his neck enters a few minutes after Jeff and I sit down. All eyes focus on him.

  “I need to talk to the immediate family of Drew Johnson.” I zero in on his father and Emily, who for some reason grab my arm and take me with them. We follow the man down another hallway and into a small room, really more like a large closet.

  “I’m Dr. Morely, and I’ve been attending to Drew. The crash was pretty serious and so are his injuries. We lost him a few times, but he’s stable enough now to undergo surgery. He’s bleeding internally, and we have to find the source. His right leg is broken, but we’ll fix that after we get the bleeding under control. We need you to sign the forms so we can take him to the OR. We’re sorry we haven’t come out sooner, but it was touch and go, and my team and I were very busy.” He sounds exasperated, but I don’t feel guilty. We were in the dark.

  Emily and I go back to the waiting room, arms around each other. Her father follows the doctor to sign the papers. I know how the doctor felt, because as soon as we walk into the room, it’s like a spotlight is on us.

  “Well?” Jeff comes up to me and holds my hand.

  “He’s going to surgery because he’s bleeding internally and they don’t know where, so they have to stop it.”

  Emily starts crying and Liam and Colin move in to comfort her.

  Time seems to stand still, but the hands on the clock say differently. It’s been four hours since we last talked to the doctor. In that time, the head of the modeling agency showed up, followed by a catering service handing out coffee, tea, and pretty much anything you can think of as far as drinks and sandwiches and pastries. A few people eat. I notice the models passing on the food but consuming flavored waters.

  “Dora, you should eat something. You didn’t have dinner. And lunch and breakfast weren’t much either.”

  I shake my head at Jeff. I definitely don’t want a vomiting session in front of this crowd. He insists I drink a cup of hot tea and it warms me up a little.

  “Are all of you here for Drew Johnson?” A petite woman in scrubs is standing in the doorway looking us all over. We nod our heads like sheep. “I’m Dr. Galena and I’m the surgeon. We found the site of the bleeding, and we had to remove Mr. Johnson’s spleen. While we were in the OR, a scan revealed some swelling in the brain. We’ve had to place him in a drug-induced coma in hopes it will give the brain time to heal on its own. Only time will tell. We were able to repair the damage to his leg once the bleeding was under control, and he’s now in intensive care. Only immediate family members are allowed to visit, one at a time, for a few minutes every hour. Even though he’s in a coma, it’s believed that patients in his condition can still hear you. We encourage you to talk to him in a positive manner. Please no negativity. A nurse will be in shortly to take family members back to the ICU waiting room.” She turns and leaves quickly before anyone can ask questions. But what else can she say? We know what she knows.

  “Come on, Dora, the nurse is here.” Both Emily and Drew’s father are waiting for me. I’m shocked why they’re still including me, like I’m family or something. Before I have the chance to wonder anymore, Jeff kisses me on the cheek and gently pushes me to join them in pursuit of the nurse down the hallway.

  ICU is a scary place. I’m in total shock as Emily and her dad let me go first. It’s like walking into a tomb, but with little beeping and whooshing noises. The nurses walk quietly from one room to another. Rooms are laid out in a semicircle, with a large island in the middle where other nurses sit observing monitors. The nurse who came to get me gestures to a room in the middle of the semicircle, and I prepare myself for what lies beyond the door.

  “Now remember,” she says quietly, “he will look different. He’s hooked up to machines by many tubes, and has some bruising.” She made this speech earlier in the waiting room. How could I have forgotten?

  I turn the corner into the room, and I don’t recognize the person in the bed. Drew’s face is all bruised and swollen. His leg is in a cast, and there are so many tubes, I can’t begin to count. I wipe the tears from my eyes. I have to be brave. This is the man I love, and I have to help him pull through this.

  “Hi, Drew.” I say, taking hold of his hand, hoping against hope that he’ll squeeze it back. I kind of feel silly for talking to him like this, but if they think he can hear me, I don’t care how ridiculous I look. “I’m sorry I ran out on you in Florida. I just felt out of my league. If it makes any difference, my heart has been broken ever since. I think and dream about you. I’ve never in my life ever felt so happy and loved. Yes, I said the L word. I love you, Drew, and deep down I knew it was you on Halloween but I thought you were a bad boy, and the parade of women I’ve seen you with in the magazines, tabloids and on TV made me believe you were a player. I’m so sorry I judged you. I’m wrong, and I want another chance if you’ll let me. Please forgive me. I love you, Drew. I’m not just saying that because you’re in here, and we’re supposed to only say positive things. I really do love you, and I want to be with you until you get tired of me. Please get better soon so we can talk like we were supposed to before this happened. My mom says things happen for a reason, but I don’t understand the reaso
n behind this. I love you, and I’ll keep saying it until you wake up. I love you, Drew.”

  “Sorry, time’s up,” a nurse says. “Can I make a suggestion?” She looks at me with kind eyes. “Go home and get some rest and then come back. I promise I’ll call you if anything changes. You have to take care of that baby.”

  “How do you know?” I ask, thinking whether I’ve said anything. I’m so tired it could be possible.

  “I was watching you on the monitor, and you’ve been rubbing your abdomen the whole time you’ve been talking to him.”

  “Nobody knows except my best friend.” I feel a little panicked that my secret will be out before I’m ready.

  “I won’t say a word.” She pats my hand and then lets me out of the room. I lean up against the wall, not sure if I can take another step. Just as the thought goes through my mind, I look up and see Jeff standing there waiting for me.

  “Come on, we’re going home to get some rest. I’ve told Emily and Mr. Johnson, and they’re going back to the loft to stay a while,” he says while I let him lead me down the hallway.

  The morning after the accident, my mom showed up at Jeff’s door. I was sound asleep and didn’t wake up until late afternoon, feeling like I had been hit by a truck.

  I check the bedside table. My cell is missing. I slowly get out of bed, in deference to my sensitive stomach and crazy equilibrium. That’s when I hear voices and I open my door to see my mom at the kitchen table with Jeff. She gets up and meets me halfway with open arms.

  “Mom? What? How?”

  “Henry told me. I know he’s supposed to keep quiet about family matters and problems, but I knew something wasn’t right and he gave in after I told him I would start ignoring him all together. I kept getting your voice mail, so I drove down this morning. He told me along the way. No, I didn’t get stopped by the police, and no, your dad didn’t know I was coming. Why didn’t you call me? I’m your mother.” She’s hugging me tightly. I feel like I did when I was a little girl and she would hug away my fears. “Jeff has filled me in. Drew’s going to pull through. From what I’ve found out, he’s in love with my daughter and she’s in love with him too. So with my connections to the other side, I’m pulling out all the stops. My grandbaby will not be fatherless.” She kisses the top of my head as I realize what she just said.