The Lost Daughters: A moving saga of womanhood

by Whitmee, Jeanne

  ‘Oh, it’s so good to see you,’ she said. ‘I can’t wait to show you everything.’

  ‘Don’t I get a kiss too?’ Matthew stood grinning beside her and she turned to throw her arms around him.

  ‘Of course. It’s lovely to see you too.’ She took a hand of each of them and drew them towards the house. ‘Come in both of you. Maggie, our cook, has left a meal wanning in the oven. It’s one of her special casseroles. Almost as good as yours, Johnny.’

  Johnny was impressed by the house, especially as she had seen the original photographs and knew what it had been like when they first found it. After supper Cathy took her proudly from room to room, showing her everything and finishing up in their own suite of rooms on the first floor. Johnny took in the spacious bedroom with its built-in wardrobes and tasteful furnishings. She also noted the divan in the dressing room, with Gerald’s pyjamas neatly folded on the pillow, and silently speculated over it. Seeing the direction of her glance, Cathy explained hurriedly: ‘Gerald sometimes sleeps in here. He works very late with his student at times, you see. He doesn’t like to disturb me.’

  ‘Of course,’ Johnny said.

  Downstairs they sat in the small drawing room, enjoying the view of the garden in the last of the evening sunshine as they drank their coffee.

  ‘You’ve obviously been busy,’ Johnny said. ‘It’s been quite a year one way and another.’

  ‘It certainly has. Since Gerald and I were married our feet have hardly touched the ground what with all the work on the house and the school to get … ’ Cathy broke off as she saw Matthew beginning to laugh. ‘What’s the matter?’ she asked. ‘What have I said?’

  ‘I think Mum was talking about more national matters,’ he told her. ‘The Profumo scandal for instance. It’s taken over the newspaper headlines for months now. And just last month, the sensational mail train robbery.’ When Cathy looked blank he explained patiently, ‘A gang hijacked a Royal Mail train and got away with over a million pounds. Surely you must have read about it?’ His eyebrows shot up in amazement as she shook her head. ‘Well — I know the Russians put a woman into space. It wasn’t you, was it?’

  ‘Don’t tease her, Matthew,’ Johnny admonished. ‘I don’t wonder she hasn’t had time to read the papers.’ She turned to Cathy and patted her hand. ‘What you’ve achieved here is an absolute wonder, dear,’ she said. ‘You deserve congratulations — both of you.’ She smiled at Gerald. ‘Take no notice of my son,’ she said. ‘Teasing Cathy used to be his main hobby. He’s forgetting that she’s a grown-up married lady now.’

  ‘Matthew is right,’ he said. ‘We really shouldn’t let ourselves get so out of touch with the outside world. Maybe I should get Cathy a television. I’m sure she would enjoy it. I’m afraid she spends quite a lot of time alone in the evenings.’

  When Cathy went upstairs with Johnny later to make sure she had everything she needed in her room, the older woman looked at her. The girl seemed well enough. Her skin glowed with the healthy outdoor life she seemed to be leading, and her eyes were clear and bright. When they had first arrived she had looked so radiant, but since the excitement of seeing them had worn off Johnny thought she detected a certain wistfulness about her; a vulnerability. There were tiny lines of strain about her eyes that no nineteen-year-old should have. She sat down on the bed and patted the space beside her.

  ‘Come and talk to me. It seems ages since we had a good chinwag. So — you’re happy?’

  ‘Oh, yes.’

  ‘Obviously it’s all worked out well. I’m so glad, Cathy.’

  ‘The school is going to be a big success,’ she said. ‘Gerald has a series of concerts planned for next summer. They’ll be in the barn studio and open to the public. The local arts society … ’

  ‘I meant you, dear,’ Johnny broke in gently. ‘You personally — your marriage. It seems to me there’s been very little time so far for you and Gerald to settle down and get to know each other.’

  ‘Oh, but there has. We had a wonderful honeymoon and we work together, don’t we? Not so much now that Gerald has started work in earnest, of course, but at the start we did.’

  Johnny slipped an arm around her. ‘So I was wrong to worry? Well, I couldn’t be more glad about it.’

  Cathy looked at Johnny hesitantly. ‘There was one disappointment. Back in the spring I thought I was going to have a baby. But it turned out to be a false alarm.’ She gave a nervous little laugh. ‘Just as well, really. As Gerald said, it wasn’t the right time.’

  Johnny smiled wryly. ‘It hardly ever is.’

  ‘But we will have children,’ Cathy went on. ‘Gerald says we will. That’s what I really want. It just hasn’t happened yet.’

  Johnny slipped an arm around her shoulder and gave her a hug. ‘Well — plenty of time, eh?’

  Cathy stood up. ‘Yes. Plenty of time. Goodnight, Johnny. Sleep well.’

  In their room Gerald was preparing for bed. He looked up as she came in. ‘Everything all right?’

  ‘Yes, fine. Isn’t it good to see Johnny and Matthew again?’

  ‘Yes.’ He pulled off his tie and began to unbutton his shirt. ‘Oh, by the way, I had a phone call earlier,’ he said. ‘We’ll be having two more guests tomorrow.’

  Cathy turned to him, a look of dismay on her face. ‘Two more? But this was supposed to be Johnny’s weekend. Who’s coming?’

  ‘Kay,’ he said. ‘She’s bringing a young pianist she’s recently come across. She seems to think he has a rare talent and wants me to hear him play. I thought that as this weekend was free it might be an ideal time.’

  ‘But this weekend isn’t free,’ she said, feeling her colour rise. ‘We have guests.’

  ‘Only the Johnsons.’

  ‘They’re important to me,’ she insisted. ‘They’re the only family I’ve got.’

  He turned to look at her, his eyes cold. ‘No. I’m the only family you’ve got, Cathy. And this is our business — our living. It’s at a critical stage of its development. It has to come before everything at the moment. Surely you can understand that?’

  ‘Of course I do.’ She turned away. ‘But I have worked hard since last spring. I think I’m entitled to one weekend at least away from school business. I haven’t seen Johnny for five months. I wanted us to spend the time with her.’

  ‘There’s nothing stopping you from spending time with them,’ he said sharply. ‘They’re your guests, not mine. And Kay isn’t coming for a social visit. For God’s sake, Cathy — she’s trying to put some business our way.’

  ‘Your way, you mean. And you’re right. I’m sure it’s not me she’s eager to see.’

  He looked at her scathingly. ‘Oh, don’t be so petty.’

  ‘I’m not being petty, wanting you to be with us — with me for a change. I hardly ever see you, Gerald.’

  ‘So why, when we have a free weekend, do you invite the Johnsons over?’

  She stared at him. ‘It was your suggestion!’

  ‘Only because you went on about it so.’ He picked up his clothes and began to walk towards the dressing room. Biting her lip, Cathy hurried after him. ‘Oh, Gerald — don’t.’

  He turned. ‘Don’t what?’

  ‘Don’t sleep in there again tonight. Stay with me.’

  He frowned. ‘I’m rather tired. I thought you were too.’

  ‘I miss you,’ she said quietly. ‘You hardly ever sleep in our bed with me any more.’

  He stood impassively as she put her arms around him and laid her head against his chest. ‘What’s wrong? Have I done something to upset you? Is it because I invited Johnny?’

  ‘Of course not. Nothing’s wrong. It’s just — all the work and the tension of getting the school up and running. I’ve put everything I have into it. We both have.’

  ‘You haven’t stopped loving me, have you? You don’t regret marrying me? If I’ve done something wrong … ’

  ‘You haven’t done anything wrong.’ He put his arms reluctantly rou
nd her. ‘You’re just being a silly girl. Imagining things.’

  ‘Then come to bed.’ She looked up at him, her green eyes wide and appealing.

  He sighed. ‘All right.’

  *

  Cathy heard the clock on the little church tower overlooking the sea strike two, and turned over for the hundredth time. All she could see of Gerald was the hump that was his back under the covers.

  She had tried her best, whispering how much she loved and needed him between kisses, reminding him of his promise that they could try for a baby as soon as the school was running smoothly. But to her bewilderment he hadn’t seemed interested in making love. Her body pressed close to his, even her most intimate caresses had failed to arouse him. After a few chaste kisses he had patted her as though she were a recalcitrant child and turned over, urging her to go to sleep. There must be some reason for it, she told herself. In spite of what he said. Did she irritate him? Did he find her distracting? Heaven only knew she was used to living with a musician. She tried to keep out of his way when he was working. Had she stopped being attractive to him for some reason? And, most worrying of all, what could she do about it?

  She slept at last as the sky began to lighten, wakening at seven to find herself once again alone in the bed. Gerald was not in the bathroom. He had obviously risen early and gone out. Resignedly, she showered and dressed, then went downstairs to make breakfast for her guests.

  Johnny and Matthew were enchanted with Melfordleigh. Cathy had booked her favourite table at the Admiral Nelson. It was to have been a surprise for Gerald too, but now he would have to stay in and wait for his own guests. She had left cold ham and a salad for the three of them in the fridge.

  They all enjoyed their day enormously, arriving back at Cuckoo Lodge at six o’clock. After lunch they had gone on a boat trip with one of the old sailors who took visitors around the point by motor cruiser to see the seals basking on their remote sandbank and glimpse the many seabirds that congregated out at the very tip of the point. They had come back windblown and happily tired and as soon as they got in Johnny and Matthew went straight upstairs to change.

  Cathy went into the kitchen to make sure that Maggie was happy about having six for dinner instead of four. Coming back she paused at the foot of the stairs. From the small studio came the sound of the piano — a Chopin polonaise. It was being played with a spirit and vitality that seized her attention at once, making her curious to see who the pianist was. She crossed the hall and stood at the half-open door. The studio door was ajar and from where she stood facing the open grand piano, Cathy had a view of the young man who was playing. He was fair-haired with a firm, strong jaw and cheekbones, but his eyes were on the keyboard, his head lowered in concentration, a look of rapture on his face. He was good. Brilliant even. There was little doubt that Gerald would accept him as a student. The piece came to an end and the young man slowly raised his head and looked directly at her. The suddenness of his unblinking dark blue stare startled her and she took a step backwards.

  ‘Thank you, Simon.’ Gerald rose and came into view as he moved towards the piano. He caught sight of her. ‘Cathy! Come in and say hello to Kay. And meet Simon Posner, who will be joining us here.’ He turned to the young man. ‘Simon, this is Cathy, my wife.’

  Simon rose and came towards her, his hand outstretched. He was well-built, with broad shoulders and long legs. She registered vaguely that he wore jeans and a black sweater over an open-necked shirt, and that there was a fine mist of perspiration on his brow. He was quite young — no more than twenty-two or -three — and he moved with an easy, loose-limbed grace. His handsome, strong-boned face was grave and unsmiling, but the compelling blue eyes held hers almost hypnotically. When he spoke she was surprised to hear that he had a slight foreign accent, though she could not place its origin.

  ‘How do you do, Mrs Cavelle? It is very good of you to have us at short notice like this.’

  Acutely aware of her windblown hair and grubby appearance, she put her hand into his and felt the power of the strong fingers as they gripped hers. ‘You’re welcome,’ she said. ‘I hope my husband has shown you both to your rooms. Dinner will be ready in about half an hour.’ She glanced at Kay, aware that the older woman was watching her closely. She wore her own city idea of country clothes, a Jaeger suit and a long rope of pearls. Cathy forced herself to smile. ‘Hello, Kay. How nice to see you again.’

  ‘Hello, Cathy.’ She took in the glowing skin and sun-streaked wind-blown hair. ‘How well you look,’ she said, biting back her resentment. ‘Marriage and sea air obviously agree with you.’ She stood up and came across to link her arm through Simon’s. ‘This young man is going to be a brilliant international concert star before he’s very much older,’ she announced. ‘And I shall be proud to say that I discovered him. Gerald has agreed to give him the benefit of all his wonderful know-how.’ She hugged Simon’s arm possessively and gave Cathy a rueful look. ‘I’ve a feeling you’re not going to be seeing much of your dear husband over the next few months. In fact, I don’t think your life will ever be quite the same again.’

  And even Kay did not realise how prophetic or significant her words were to prove.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Dinner was a sociable affair. Kay went out of her way to be particularly charming to Johnny and Matthew and complimented Cathy effusively on the house and on finding such a good cook. She also encouraged Simon to tell them all a little about his background. He told them that his father, anticipating Hitler’s invasion of Poland, had fled to England along with his wife and mother-in-law in 1938, shortly before Simon was born, and had immediately joined the RAF. His grandmother was Danuta Polinski, who was a well-known concert pianist in Poland during the twenties and thirties. Simon was still a baby when his father was killed and his mother took up work as a secretary and interpreter at the War Office, leaving him in the care of his grandmother for the rest of the war.

  Danuta missed her musical career and the gay social whirl she had enjoyed in Warsaw before the war. Her poor grasp of the English language and her unwillingness to adapt to the British way of life made her rather isolated, but as soon as Simon was big enough to sit at the piano she found a new vocation in teaching him to play.

  Simon was without inhibitions when it came to recounting his musical accomplishments and the story of his meteoric progress had everyone enthralled. By the time he was twelve he was giving concerts and when he was sixteen had already begun to teach schoolchildren, saving the money he earned to buy himself a new piano and to help pay his way at college.

  In anyone else the lack of modesty would have been obnoxious, but the warmth of Simon’s personality more than made up for any hint of boastfulness. He charmed them all with his vivacity, his keen, blue eyes and ready smile. Even Maggie lingered as she drifted in and out to wait on the dinner table, unable to take her eyes off the charismatic young man with the fascinating accent.

  After everyone else had said goodnight and gone to bed Gerald invited Kay into the smaller of the two studios, which he also used as an office. Switching on the desk lamp, he took a decanter of brandy and two glasses from a cabinet.

  ‘Well, what do you think of him?’ she asked, relaxing into one of the deep leather chairs.

  Gerald filled one glass and handed it to her. He took his time over pouring his own drink, considering carefully for a moment before answering. ‘Well, he’s certainly talented, I’ll give you that. Maybe a little on the flamboyant side for my taste, and he does seem to have picked up one or two bad technical habits, but I daresay there’s nothing that can’t be ironed out.’

  ‘I like his flamboyance. It’s part of his personality.’

  ‘You would!’ Gerald smiled as he sat down opposite her. ‘He’s full of himself, isn’t he? And what about that rather pseudo accent? Is it cultivated? After all, he was born in this country.’

  ‘He says his grandmother never spoke good English and always insisted that they conversed in Polish at ho
me. As she brought him up, and taught him music, he obviously spoke it most of the time.’ She raised an eyebrow at him. ‘Anyway, you can’t deny that it’s terribly attractive and sexy. And it does go with the image of a concert pianist.’

  ‘For those who still see Anton Walbrook in Dangerous Moonlight as the archetype!’ he said with a smile. ‘But then I suppose this is the professional PR view I’m hearing,’ he added cynically.

  Kay shrugged. ‘Perhaps. I’m concerned with what sells — what the public goes for. I’m not ashamed to admit it.’

  She got up and went to help herself to another brandy. ‘So — will you accept him?’

  ‘Oh yes. I’d be a fool not to, wouldn’t I?’

  ‘You can manage two students at once then?’

  ‘Yes. While I’m working with one in the other studio, the second can be in here practising. Both rooms are fairly soundproof. These old walls are thick.’ He gave her a wry grin. ‘Oh, yes, he’s definitely worth teaching. I just hope he hasn’t become too arrogant. Doting mum and grandmama, adoring philistine audiences who love that accent and the toothpaste smile.’

  ‘That’s not fair, Gerry. And I’m sure he isn’t arrogant.’

  ‘How did you find him, by the way?’

  ‘His mother, Anya, is a freelance researcher now. Summit Films hired her to do some Polish background research on a film. She worked with us for about two months. We got along rather well and she was telling me about her son. She’s terribly ambitious for him. She took me along to a concert to hear him play. I was impressed and immediately thought of you.’

  ‘That was very thoughtful of you.’

  She held up her glass, examining the remaining drops of fiery liquid. ‘As a matter of fact I’m thinking of leaving Summit and starting up my own PR agency.’

  He smiled. ‘And you saw Simon as a potential client! Ah, now we’re getting to it. I was getting quite worried about you, Kay. Altruism is so uncharacteristic. I was afraid you might be going sentimental in your old age.’