by james
admit that it was a touching display of affection. Too bad Melody was standing right here, or he could have stolen the idea to use on her.
The fireworks continued for another ten seconds, and then came to an end. Diane folded her arms proudly in front of her chest.
“Timmy, I love you so much!”
Then the entire café exploded.
It blew apart like a bomb hit it, with a deafening blast that sprayed flame and debris everywhere. A board of wood struck Diane in the head, knocking her to the ground, as everyone else dove for cover. A chunk of burning something-or-other landed dangerously close to Tim’s face.
After the debris stopped falling from the sky, Tim managed to shakily stand up. Dual Streams was nothing but a burning, smoking pile of rubble.
Peter stared at the wreckage. “I’d called the technician again about that gas leak. Guess I’ll call him back and cancel.”
“Our place…” Tim whimpered.
Melody touched his arm. “What can I say to make this better?”
“How about ‘Tim, you’ll wake up any second’?”
“You know,” said Peter, “if we give the fires time to burn out a little it might not look so bad. Weren’t all the appliances still under warranty?”
Sylvia and Walter rushed over to Diane. As Walter helped her to her feet, she appeared disoriented but reasonably unharmed. She looked at the demolished restaurant with a great deal of curiosity. “Did somebody just blow up something?”
“Are you all right?” asked Walter.
“Yes, honey, I’m fine.”
Alex was lying on his back, with Karen lying facedown on top of him. She got up and brushed some soot off the front of her shirt.
“You were willing to be hit by burning restaurant fragments for me!” Alex
declared.
“Yes, I was.”
“I’ve never known anyone willing to be hit by burning restaurant fragments
for me before!”
“Me either,” said Karen. “Your turn next.”
She kissed him. He responded with equal passion.
As Melody put her arm around him, Tim pulled away and turned to face her. “Okay, this whole thing has gotten out of hand! Do you understand? I don’t know if the stars are in some funky alignment, or if there’s something in the drinking water, or if some gypsy has cursed the beejesus out of us, but we all need to just knock it off! There’s nothing wrong with showering a loved one with affection, but this…this is drenching them with it! We need a nice, normal, boring relationship!”
“I couldn’t agree more,” said Melody.
“I’ll be inattentive, you’ll be inattentive, no cafés get blown up, nobody gets squished by sick elephants, and everyone’s happy! That’s the kind of relationship we were meant for, Melody. Will you join me in one?”
“Of course I will.” She raised her hand in an imaginary toast. “Here’s to
boredom.”
“To boredom.”
“And lots of great sex.”
“That too.”
They kissed, and it was the purest, deepest kiss either of them had ever
known. As fire trucks arrived, Walter took Diane in his hands and kissed her. Karen
kissed Alex. Peter fidgeted a bit but didn’t try to kiss Sylvia.
“Do you think you can get a book out of this?” asked Tim.
Melody shook her head. “Too scary for me.”
The lovers kissed for what seemed like an eternity, destined to live happily
ever after as the wreckage burned and smoke billowed into the night air.
- The End