by Lyle, Linda;
“A little bit won’t hurt. Someone as pretty as you doesn’t need to worry about one little dessert,” Dale replied. His sugared words melted in the fire in her eyes. He realized too late that he had taken the wrong tactic.
“Actually, I’ve been looking forward to spending time with Mama. I haven’t seen her in three months. So, if you don’t mind, I’ll have to bow out this time. Why don’t you go ahead? I’m sure there are plenty of people at McKnight’s to keep you company.”
Dale’s face colored slightly, but he had the good sense to take the hint. Despite her mother’s protests to the contrary, Dale left ten minutes later. Rachel sighed as she heard his car pull out of the drive. But her respite was short.
“Rachel Grant! I cannot imagine what just got into you. That was so rude and inconsiderate.”
“I was rude and inconsiderate? You’re the one who invited him knowing good and well that I never wanted to see him again.”
“Why? He’s such a nice, polite young man.”
“He’s nice to you because he wants you to trust him. That’s the way he works, Mama.” Rachel pushed her chair away from the table and picked up her plate. Her mother’s voice followed her into the kitchen.
“You’re just too picky. One day you’re gonna find yourself all alone.”
“That’s enough, Mama!” Rachel’s voice took on a sharp edge. “I don’t want to talk about this anymore. You obviously will never understand.” Rachel put the dishes down with a bang.
“Don’t you talk to me that way, young lady. I raised you, and I deserve a little respect.”
“So do I, Mama. So do I.” Rachel turned on her heel and went back to the dining room. She started stacking the dishes to give herself something to do with her hands. It was either that or strangle Mama.
Moments later, she heard the back door slam and the screech of the screen door as it bounced closed. Rachel continued to clean off the table and load the dishwasher. She scrubbed the counters and appliances until everything glowed. She scrubbed Dale’s image from the stove, but she couldn’t get their first and only date out of her mind.
At the urging of her mother, she had gone out with Dale six months ago. He seemed charming enough and very attentive. The first part of the date was fine. They went to a movie and dinner. He was a perfect gentleman, opening doors and holding her chair. However, on the way home, he turned into a dead-end street and parked in the shadows.
“Why are we stopping here?”
“I just wanted to spend a little time alone with you,” Dale said. He put his arm across the back of the seat, and before she knew what was happening, his open mouth was on hers. She pushed him away, but he kept coming back like an octopus. Finally, Rachel punched him in the jaw, sending him back to his corner.
“What was that for?” he yelled.
“Take me home.”
“Fine!” He started the car and slammed it into gear. He must have left half of his tread on the asphalt. They made it home in record time, although he did slow down when he got within a block of her house.
She had never felt comfortable telling her mother about that night, despite the fact that her mother kept asking her about Dale. She had skirted the issue until the weekend was over and then hurried back to her quiet apartment in Myerstown. She thought she had heard the last of him, but some nightmares just kept coming back. What would possess Dale to think she was still interested in him? Why would he still be interested in her after their date? It had to be her mother. Would she ever learn to stop meddling?
An hour later, Edna Grant came in, quiet and sulky. Rachel waited until she had settled into her seat in the living room before she started.
“Mama, I want you to promise me something.”
“What?” she bit out.
“Promise me that you’ll never invite that man over here again, especially not in my presence.”
“Don’t I have the right to invite anyone I want into my home?” Edna sat up straight. “This is still my home, isn’t it?”
“Of course it is, Mama, but I don’t ever want to see him again. If I ever think you’re going to pull something like this again, then I won’t come back to visit. Do you understand?” Edna’s mouth tightened into a thin line. “Do you understand, Mama?”
“Fine. You can die an old maid if you want to. I wash my hands of the matter.” She got up and exited the room with a flourish.
Rachel sighed and turned on the TV. Maybe there was a good movie on.
Her mother never said another word the rest of the weekend, except to ask what she wanted for dinner and to say goodbye. It was with great relief that Rachel got into the car after lunch on Sunday. The minute the house was out of sight, she floored the gas pedal and hightailed it for home.
ten
Randy spent the weekend finishing the wallpaper in the dining room. All it needed now was some furniture and pictures. He looked around and sighed. What it really needed was a woman’s touch. Rachel’s face popped into his mind. What was she doing tonight? What does it matter what she’s doing tonight? She made it clear the other day that she was interested in someone else. But what about Friday and that parting look? The argument went on, back and forth.
He cleaned up the dining room and moved his tools to the master bedroom. It and the bathroom were the only rooms left needing repairs. He had put it off time and again. The bedroom was empty except for his tools and the sawhorses. Empty like the rest of the house. He tried to shake off the dark mood that was descending on his spirit, but it was like trying to shake off a leech. It just hung there and sucked the blood from his veins. He was tired of living alone, tired of the overwhelming silence.
He lifted his eyes toward the ceiling. “What am I doing all this for? If I don’t have someone to share it with, then, what’s the point?” He waited, but his prayer seemed to have bounced off the roof. The heaviness in his chest felt like a physical weight. He sat on the dusty floor with his head in his hands. Tears flowed unbidden down his cheeks.
“I’m here.”
“That’s not the point. I need someone tangible, human, to talk to and laugh with.”
“I’m here.”
“I know, but I need someone all my own. You gave Eve to Adam because he was lonely. Why can’t you do the same for me?”
“I’m here, Randy. I’m all you need.”
He nodded, then picked himself up. He had gotten his answer, like it or not.
❧
Monday morning, he rushed through grading papers, so that nothing would detain him from his meeting with Rachel. He still had a chance with her. He could sense it in the way she had looked at him Friday. With a flourish of almost unintelligible script, he finished the last paper and threw it on the stack. All he needed now was a rubber band to hold the pages together and he was ready to go.
Rachel came by at the usual time, more subdued than normal. Something was wrong. He wished he could help her, but something told him to wait. A part of him wanted to reach out and pull her into his arms. Still, he held back.
“Hi, Rachel. Have a nice weekend?” The look on her face told him before she ever opened her mouth.
“No. How about you?” She colored and tried again. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to sound so…so…”
“Honest.” He smiled, then she laughed.
“Yeah.”
“Well, as it happens, I had a lousy weekend myself, so I can empathize. How about we go to lunch and not talk about it.”
“Sounds like a plan to me.”
❧
Seated in their favorite corner of The Magnolia, Rachel watched as Randy waited at the counter for their order. She wondered if his weekend had gone as badly as hers. He brought the food over and sat down opposite her.
“Now, what did you want to talk about?”
She took a sip of her iced tea. “Well, I’m just not sure what to do about the Center. The university can’t help and the city won’t help. I asked the church if we could use the fellowship hall,
but that’s out too. Did you have any luck with the historical society?”
“I called and talked to the local chairperson who said all their funds are tied up right now, but she implied that it wasn’t a worthwhile project.”
“Wasn’t worthwhile!” Rachel’s head popped up and her eyes sparked. “What do they mean, not worthwhile? Don’t they know what goes on out there? Don’t they care?” she sputtered.
“Hey! Don’t shoot the messenger.” Randy raised his hands in surrender. “I’m only repeating what they told me.”
“I’m sorry, Randy. I didn’t mean to yell at you. It’s just been a long weekend followed by a Monday.”
“I can relate.” Randy reached across and covered her hand with his. A shiver ran up her spine. “Hey, you’re not cold, are you?”
“No. I’m fine. Just a reflex.” She shrugged it off.
“Do you want to talk about this weekend?” He shot her a piercing look, and another shiver threatened to run loose.
“What do you mean?” She took another sip of tea to avoid looking him in the eye.
“Rachel, I can tell something’s wrong.” He lifted her chin until their eyes met. “Let me help you.” She could see the concern in his eyes, such beautiful eyes. Warm brown pools that she could drown in. His hand encircled hers, and she could feel the warmth spreading to her cheeks. She wanted to tell him everything, but something held her back, some unknown fear clamped down on her tongue and robbed her of the words.
“I just had a little fight with my mom. No big deal. I’ll be fine.” She pulled her hand back, breaking the connection. “So, what do we do about the Center?”
He leaned back in his chair with a sigh. For a moment, she thought he would try again. She held her breath, but he let her change the subject. She felt oddly disappointed. Talk turned back to the Center and their options. There didn’t seem to be any more choices.
“There’s only one thing left that I can think of,” Randy said with resignation.
“What’s that?”
“Prayer.”
eleven
Randy’s words echoed through her mind all week. Rachel took his words to heart and began to pray over the situation. She couldn’t get the feel of his hand on hers or the look in his eyes out of her mind. She prayed for understanding and guidance. Thursday she flipped open her Bible at random. The words of David from the book of Psalms seemed to jump off the page. “Wait on the Lord.” She closed the book with a thud. She didn’t have time to wait.
Kyle called for another date on Friday, and again on Saturday. With each date, Rachel became more and more frustrated. They were all the same as the first. They went to the movies or out to eat, but the conversation never got past small talk. More and more, she found herself thinking about her conversations with Randy. In a few meetings, Rachel had learned more about him than she had learned about Kyle in five years. She wanted to talk to Susan about it, but she could already hear the lecture and see the knowing look. She would just have to work this out on her own, or better yet, talk it out with Kyle. Maybe he just needed a little push in the right direction. She picked up the phone and dialed his number.
“Hello.” Somehow the sound of his voice was annoying. She shook the thought away.
“Hi, Kyle. It’s Rachel. I wanted to talk to you about Friday night.” She wound the phone cord around her fingers as she talked.
“What about it? You’re still free, aren’t you?” The worry in his voice made her smile.
“Yes. It’s not that. I was just wondering if we could skip the movie and go somewhere and get to know each other better.”
“Oh, sure. That would be good. Where do you want to go?”
“I don’t know. Just some place we can talk without so many people around.”
“I know just the place. Why don’t I surprise you?” Something about the tone in his voice sent a warning shiver up her spine, but she ignored it. It was probably just nerves.
“Okay.”
“See you Friday.”
She hung up and finished getting ready for work. Monday was the same old thing, a repeat of the Monday before it. She hadn’t seen much of Randy since their meeting the week before. It was almost as if he were avoiding her. It was probably just her imagination. He probably had a lot of grading to do. With a sigh, she picked up a one-inch stack of papers and added them to her growing tower of papers.
The rest of the week was a blur of grading and classes. One day proceeded after another in their onward march to eternity. She was getting overly dramatic these days. What was the problem? She should be happy, ecstatic, but here she was moaning and groaning. She finally had Kyle, so why was she so depressed? She stuffed the stacks of papers into her bag and headed for the Magnolia. Maybe a cappuccino would help.
She spotted him the minute she walked into the room. Randy was sitting in their favorite spot, holding a cup of cappuccino like it was a lifeline. Rachel ordered her coffee and made her way through the tables, her step definitely lighter.
“Hey, stranger! What do you know?”
He jumped at the sound of her voice, spilling hot liquid all over his hand. “Ow!” he yelped. She put down her coffee and grabbed some napkins in one smooth move. She dried his hand and checked for burns. On a whim, she kissed his hand.
“There. I kissed it and made it better.”
❧
The scalding coffee was nothing compared to the fire that went through him at the touch of her lips on his hand. He wanted nothing more than to grab her and kiss her right then. Her smile seemed to light up the entire room. It had been a long two weeks without that smile. He had made a concerted effort to stay out of her path, hoping he could shake the growing need to see her. It only brought pain, especially when he thought of the other guy.
“What’s wrong?” She looked concerned. “Does it still hurt?” She turned his hand over and inspected it again.
“Oh, it’s nothing. I was just surprised, that’s all.”
“Well, I’m sorry I startled you. Can I buy you another cappuccino to make up for it?” she asked. Everything in him said to get up and leave. Everything except his heart which was crying, “Stay!” His heart won.
“Sure.”
They talked about school, the weather, politics. Anything that wasn’t personal. They stretched the coffee as long as they could, neither one in a hurry to leave—both unwilling to leave. Finally, he got up.
“Well, I have a meeting in five minutes. I guess I’d better get a move on.”
“Oh. Okay.” She seemed disappointed. His heart grasped at the hope that there was still a chance.
“Maybe we could have dinner afterwards?” Then she lowered the boom.
“I’m sorry, but I already have a date tonight.”
The words cut through him like a knife. He stood in shock while she gathered her things. He struggled to sound normal. “Oh. Well, maybe another time.”
“Maybe.”
“I’ll see you later, then.” He turned and walked toward the door, the walking wounded.
twelve
Randy walked back to his office, shoulders slouched. He tried to shake off the feelings of depression that threatened to overwhelm him. It just wasn’t meant to be. God had other plans for him. He would just have to wait on God’s timing. He repeated the words to himself over and over again, but nothing loosened the knot growing in his throat. He was so engrossed in his thoughts that he almost didn’t see the young man standing in front of his office.
“Excuse me.” Randy jumped at the sound of the voice. “Didn’t mean to scare you.”
“I should of been paying more attention,” Randy replied with a shrug of his shoulders. “What can I do for you?”
“I’m looking for Rachel Grant. Have you seen her?”
“Yes. I just left her at The Magnolia.”
“Yeah?” Kyle looked Randy over with a suspicious eye. “What were you doing there?”
“Having a cappuccino, if it’s any business of your
s.” Randy straightened to his full six feet, but this guy was still a head taller. He didn’t like this guy’s tone of voice, but he didn’t want to start anything in the hallway.
“Well, if you were having it with my fiancée, then it is my business,” Kyle said, his lip turning into smirk.
“Fiancée?” Randy couldn’t have heard right.
“Yeah, that’s right. It’s not official or anything, but it’s understood.” Kyle leaned against the wall, obviously enjoying himself.
“Rachel never said anything about an engagement.” Randy felt his heart drop, but he had his doubts about this character.
“She probably didn’t want to make a big deal out of it. We’ll wait until I buy her a ring before we make any announcements.” Kyle stood up and pointed toward the quad. “Is The Magnolia out there?” Randy gave a weak nod. “Then, I guess I’d better get going before I miss her.” Kyle sauntered down the hall with a backward wave. “See you around, Professor.”
Randy blindly searched for the right key to his office. Stumbling into his office, he closed and locked the door behind him before sinking into his chair. He raked his fingers through his hair. He felt like he was going to be sick. Could it be true? Had Rachel already made her choice? If it was true, why hadn’t she said anything? He moaned into his hands. How had he let it go this far? Deep in his heart he knew he loved Rachel. How could he stay here, seeing her every day, knowing she belonged to someone else? Worse still, what if she moved away? How could he stay here even if she left? Everything at Myerstown reminded him of Rachel.
He tried to pray, but the words wouldn’t come. Finally, he took a deep breath, smoothed his hair and suit, and gathered the papers he needed for the faculty meeting. A few minutes later he was sitting in the conference room pretending nothing was happening, while inside everything was crumbling to pieces.
Dr. Jenson, the president of the university, stood and called the meeting to order. “I called this meeting to tell those of you with tenure about our plans to open a satellite school in Dothan which will offer courses for military personnel at the local Air Force base. There will be openings for several full-time instructors, as well as a position for an administrator. We would like to hire local people for the main teaching positions, but we want the administrator to be someone from this school who is willing to move. It will be a promotion and a significant pay raise.” Randy barely heard the rest of the information. It was like a lifeline being thrown to a drowning man. Surely this was God at work, giving him a way out of his suffering. He latched onto the idea like a lifejacket.