Taking Control

by L. V. Lane

  “I won’t let you fail.”

  “How will I know when I’m ready?”

  “That part is easy,” he said. “There won’t be any more time.” I didn’t like the sound of that. There was a rushing in my ears, the steady drum of blood moving too fast. Fingers under my chin, he turned my face to his and waited until I lifted my eyes. “You think baby birds come with a checklist? Practice can take them so far. Eventually, they have to jump off the branch and try.”

  I blew out a puff of breath. “I’ve seen dead baby birds. This is not a good analogy.”

  He smirked and let his hand settle over my throat, and the weight comforted me. “Only the ones who didn’t practice. We are going to practice.”

  “But what are we practicing? So far the only thing we’ve practiced is—”

  “Fucking,” he said grinning openly. “You should have studied investing. The reason they don’t let you meet Alphas is because attachments form. Your investment encourages my investment to keep you safe. Permanent attachments are discouraged—fucks up their scheduling among other things. But it’s hard not to become attached. Making investing optional is just a political bow over a biological imperative.”

  I shook my head in confusion.

  “You think an Omega has ever refused to invest?”

  A strange sickly feeling wormed into my stomach.

  “You intended to refuse investment. Statistically, one hundred percent of Omegas go into their first deployment with that intent, even the Healers and Healers are the most giving people I know. Want to know how many actually refuse to invest?”

  I didn’t want him to tell me the answer. I already knew the answer.

  “It’s biological. You can’t help it any more than I can. I haven’t had a straight thought in my head between picking you up from that collection room and coming inside your belly.” He smiled. “I’m thinking straight now—straighter. I think it’s time for you to do some reading.”

  He picked up the discarded information tablet and held it out to me.

  Reading? My mind was stuck in a loop after his revelations. I had forgotten about his offer to allow me time to study the control lessons. I wasn’t sure I wanted to anymore. Despite the troubling nature of the conversation, this moment felt amiable like the wild encounter at the table had never happened. My fingers remained tucked against my lap. Did he mean for me to sit here and read it?

  “There are videos, but I think reading it will be better. When you get to the end of each section, we can have a discussion about it. If I think any points might benefit from a practical example, we can go right ahead.”

  There was a faint ringing in my ears as he pressed the tablet into my numb fingers.

  “You want me to read it while sitting here?”

  He kissed my temple. “Yes, you can read it aloud.” His fingers slipped under the bottom of my shirt and stroked over the tops of my thighs while I grappled with the ‘aloud’ part. “While you are sitting here.” He watched where his fingers played. “Although I might put you into different positions depending on the section…and whether I want to watch your face…or hold you.” He tugged the shirt open, then smoothed the material apart in a slow, measured movement that made my stomach dip again. “Start reading.” As his lips pressed against my temple, he resumed the soothing strokes over the top of my thighs.

  I stared at the tablet, watching it shake in my hands.

  “If you don’t want to read, that’s okay. You can kneel on the floor between my legs and practice deep throating me.” He rubbed gentle circles over my tummy. “You do need the practice, so I don’t mind. But if you’re not sucking my cock, then you are going to be reading. And we’ve got plenty of time left this cycle, now that you’ve had a nap. I’ll let you decide what you want to do first.”

  My stomach clenched and his fingers stilled over it. “What would you prefer to do, Eloise?”

  I started reading.

  He started to play. Both hands, touching, stroking. My hair, my legs, my arms, across my tummy and hips. There was nothing overtly sexual about the touch, but my body responded anyway. Dampness pooled between my legs. It was just an introduction for goodness sake.

  When we got to the end of the section, he asked me if I had any questions. I said not.

  I swiped to the next section. “Fundamentals of Control,” I said.

  “Good girl.” He kissed my cheek. “I need to hold you while you read this part. Okay?”

  Hold me? My cheeks burned, but it wasn’t like I had a choice.

  Trailing kisses over my cheek, he whispered close to my ear, “Open your legs for me, baby.”

  A long breath escaped me, my shoulders slumped, and the tablet felt unnaturally heavy in my hands.

  I parted my legs.

  Curving an arm around my back, he settled one hand at my hip and the other over the apex of my thigh. Fingers parted my folds and pressed in gently until he was all the way inside. Pumping in and out a few times, he settled to cup me intimately.

  I nearly dropped the information tablet and the rush to catch it clamped everything inside down.

  I started to read, but it jumbled up in my mind. My mouth moved. Words came out. My traitorous body did not know what to make of the way he held me. And I became wet.

  I was reading about the importance of establishing rules. How could rules be perceived as sexual? What the hell was wrong with me? “—rules are inherent. Both parties will instinctively know what is appropriate within the Omega-Controller relationship. However, for completeness, a list of common rules is provided in Appendix section 5c. Whether a rule has been explicitly or implicitly expressed, failure to comply will result in—” I dropped the tablet.

  It hit the floor with a clatter.

  “Are you asking for a break from reading?”

  Break? “No! I’ll—should I get it?”

  He brushed my hair back from my face—I was sure so he could get better access to see me. “Do you want to carry on reading?”

  I nodded.

  “You need to pick up the tablet, then.”

  Everything he said cranked my tension up another notch. How was I supposed to get it? It was on the floor. He was holding me—inside and did not appear inclined to release me.

  He watched my internal debate unfold. Just how many twisted ways could he find to torment me?

  “Go ahead then.”

  I didn’t move and questioned my ability to remain sane. Despite my rising temper, my pussy became wetter. What was wrong with me?

  “I promise it won’t hurt,” he growled next to my ear.

  It didn’t hurt, but there was something about being made to do it that set me squirming with embarrassment and trembling with excitement all at once. Having retrieved the tablet, I gripped it so tightly my fingers ached.

  And I never dropped it again, no matter what he did.

  Logan proved to be a very thorough teacher.

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  Omega pheromones were detectable by all dynamics and non-dynamics alike.

  Alpha pheromones were subtle, and detectable only to the more sensitive Omega genus—they became abundant during their rut.

  Doctor Lillian Brach

  Eloise

  WE STARTED THE next day with the shower, minus the sex, and given how thorough he was in cleaning me, this disappointed me. Then came the ‘maintenance spank’, which I did not enjoy at all. Followed by ‘lap time’ while he fed me, which I tolerated.

  By the time he declared it was ‘reading time’, I was thoroughly pissed off and extremely frustrated. There had been two more reading sessions yesterday, and I had yet to complete one without dropping the tablet, which led to ‘time on my knees’.

  It was with deep suspicion that I greeted his instruction to lay on the bed for this reading session. As soon as I was in place and began reading, he pressed my legs open and began to eat me out like he was starving and I was the only available source of food.

  I dropped the tab
let twice in the space of five minutes. Logan didn’t stop while I fumbled to pick it up, and I wasn’t going to point out my failings. The third time it fell forward and hit him on the head.

  Grunting a curse, he lifted his head and gave me such a furious scowl that I actually giggled. I clamped my hand over my mouth, thinking this was about to earn another spanking or ‘time on my knees’ neither of which I wanted, but he surprised me by laughing.

  We both laughed. It took me several minutes before I could find calm. I think I might have been hysterical by that point.

  “Your ability to focus is shocking,” he said, then his eyes darkened, and he crawled up the bed over me. Just the sound of him yanking the buckle open had a trigger effect on me. I sucked a deep breath in, and barely had time to gather my wits before he had buried deep inside. What followed was hard and fast and exactly what I wanted.

  After we cleaned up and I had put some ship-side casuals on, he took me to meet some of his team. As the door opened, he placed a hand over the back of my neck. The action was comforting—I had forgotten how crowded and vast the ship was. It made me hyper-aware of his presence and filtered out everything else.

  “It’s not far,” he said, and his eyes held a sensitive weight that reminded me of the day we first met. A lot had happened since then—I could not reconcile just how much. “Keep your shielding up when we leave this room. I know what we have been doing has made holding it a challenge. The team will be overwhelming at first, so you’ll need to block them. We’ll be meeting with them daily going forward. By the time we arrive, you’ll be comfortable in their presence.”

  He must have forewarned the team of our arrival because they were waiting in a small conference room and every head snapped my way as we entered.

  Logan’s fingers tightened on my neck as if sensing my flight urge, and he pulled me in closer to his side and asked, “You good?”

  I nodded. It wasn’t a big space, but there was an eight-seater table in the center, a small facility area to the right, and image wall directly opposite the door depicting a map and some scrolling updates.

  The team leader, Hudson, was handsome in a severe, rugged way. After introducing himself, Hudson launched into a lengthy instruction on appropriate behavior during the operation. I was so intimidated, I don’t think I heard half of it. Finishing this mighty monolog, he asked me if I understood. I was serious when I asked him if he could send me the transcript to study later.

  Everyone, but Hudson and I, thought this was hysterically funny.

  Next, I was introduced to Dano, who like Hudson was an Alpha. He had the typical Alpha build, dark skin, and stunning bright green eyes. Compared to Hudson, he came across as easy-going. Then three Betas, Sean, Jordan and Riley, descended on me with the enthusiasm of giant excited puppies. I thought for a terrifying moment that they would hug-crush me. Logan must have come to the same conclusion because he yanked me close to his side and snarled at them to, “Calm the fuck down.”

  Now scolded puppies, they approached me one at a time to reverently shake my hand. A barrage of questions followed about my singularity, and we sat at the table where drinks were passed out.

  “If I am holding an item belonging to someone, I can sense them,” I explained. “Where they are and how they are feeling. I can also detect how people close to me are feeling. Usually, I block it out. It can be overwhelming at times. Especially if there are crowds of people…or they have strong feelings.”

  Riley suggested a game where I guessed what they were thinking.

  “No,” Hudson barked out and leveled the man with a glare.

  “I don’t—ah—know what people are thinking,” I explained. “I can sense their emotional state. More so if I’m touching them.”

  “Still, fucking no,” Hudson said, continuing to glare at the wayward Beta.

  I started shaking. Had I done something wrong?

  Logan pulled me onto his lap like he did when we were alone. We weren’t alone. Face burning, I fretted. “Hush,” he said, pulling me closer until I was surrounded by him. “He wasn’t angry at you.”

  “I’m sorry, Eloise,” Riley apologized. His eyes couldn’t decide whether to settle on Logan, Hudson or me. “I wasn’t thinking properly. I’ve never met a Singular before. Lots of Healers, but they’re different. You just smell so—”

  He yelped as Dano thumped him on the shoulder. “Shut up, Dickhead,” Dano muttered. “The hole’s already deep enough.”

  Smell?

  There was a tic thumping in Hudson’s jaw, and he was still glaring at Riley like he wanted to rip him apart. The tension was palpable, even without my singularity. No one was looking at me, but they were focused on me. I didn’t mean to let the shielding down, but I was anxious, and that mental wall collapsed.

  As the wall fell, a flood of lust hit me, and I rushed from anxious to full-blown panic.

  Logan muttered a curse. His fingers closed around the front of my throat and squeezed tight enough to redirect my attention. “Shield yourself, baby.” His lips pressed against my temple and that comforting rumble dragged me back from chaos.

  I came down slowly. Feeling foolish and confused as I did.

  “I didn’t realize it would be like this,” I said. It felt like I had spent much of the last few days in this state of tremulous confusion.

  “That’s because you never did the training,” Logan said.

  “They need to change the policy,” Hudson said, reminding me that we were still in the conference room.

  I had forgotten about the policy change. It felt like a lifetime ago when the recruiter had mentioned it. A quiet conversation followed. It shifted from the policy to the operation. Logan’s grip on me eased, and the discussion, once more, included me. I forgot that I was still sitting on his lap somewhere during this, it was only Hudson calling it a day that reminded me of where I was.

  No one mentioned what had happened again, but I was glad to leave the room. I wanted time to process what had happened.

  I desperately wanted time on my own.

  “Was that normal?” I asked when we were once more in our room. Approaching the portal window, I stared out at the beautiful star-filled sky. There was a planet in the distance, a dull, creamy orange orb.

  It looked impossibly beautiful from here.

  I wondered what it was like up close, whether it was inhabited, and if so, how its people experienced the war.

  “Normal? You’re an Omega, Singular or otherwise, you’re still an Omega,” Logan said. “I’ll do whatever I need to do to make you feel safe—to keep you safe. If you had completed the training, then you would understand why.”

  Aggression rolled off him in thick, cloying waves. His eyes were entirely black and held an intensity I had not witnessed before. I was frozen in place, but there was a mounting need to flee. That meeting had changed things between us and I feared it wasn’t in a positive way.

  My eyes darted to the door.

  “Don’t,” he growled. “If you try to leave it will make it worse.”

  Worse? My vision started to tunnel. Worse than what?

  He was staring at my lips, and I found it difficult to breathe. I could still feel where his fingers had been against my throat. Not painful, more a tingling of awareness.

  I had never been able to smell anything due to the nature of my singularity and assumed I did not produce a scent either.

  “What do I smell like?” I asked at a whisper.

  His eyes lifted to mine and he stared at me for the longest time.

  “You smell like a compulsion.” He rolled his shoulders as if trying to ease an underlying tension. “I want you to shield yourself, Eloise. Whatever I do. I want you to keep your shield in place.”

  CHAPTER NINE

  Eloise

  I KNOW LOGAN told me not to leave, but something had flipped inside me. His aggression, the subtext of threat, and the thought of him chasing me, set my pussy quivering. My limbs became heavy, while my mind became empty
and light.

  His nostrils flared.

  I ran.

  I don’t think I managed more than two steps before his arms closed around me from behind. My feet left the ground.

  My squeal was cut off as his fingers tightened over my throat, and I struggled, adrenaline flooding me when I could not get free. Logan's arms were like immovable bands—and that hand around my throat—I thought I might go crazy from the feel of it.

  “Hush.” His lips were close to my ear, and a shiver rippled through my body. “When I say don’t do something, baby. You’re not supposed to do it.” His tone said he was amused with me, but the heightened level of aggression and the cock straining against my backside told a different story. “And you’re still not fucking shielding.”

  Hauling me into the bedroom, he stripped my clothing before dumping me on the bed. Everything was spinning, and I leaned back onto my elbows, watching him prowl back and forth at the bottom of the bed. His eyes were hooded and lustful, and his chest heaved as he dragged deep breaths in. For a man who was usually so controlled, his lack of control was stoking my own arousal to a near fever-pitch.

  “You shouldn’t have done that,” he said. He began stripping clothing off a piece at a time, prowling back and forth, and never taking his eyes from me. “You don’t run from me—ever. Especially not when I’m feeling possessive.”

  I couldn’t stop looking at him; I thought I might never get enough of looking at him. He was so rarely naked. It was like he had me on rations, and I fell into a kind of drunken lust stupor. His cock was jutting out, tip glistening and making my mouth water. He rolled his shoulders, sending the bulging muscles rippling. Every movement, every step, presented a different view of that beautiful body, muscles bulging and relaxing. Bending my knees, I let them fall apart in silent invitation. I was so wet and needy, and I just wanted him to stop pacing and get on with whatever was happening next.

  He growled softly, and his eyes, they promised terrible things.