The Good Luck Charm

by Helena Hunting

  I glance at Lilah as I zip my fly, noting the heat in her cheeks and the wet spots appearing on her skirt. “Oh my God,” she mutters, running her fingers through her tousled strands in an attempt to put herself back in order. She grabs her purse and sets it in her lap to cover the mess.

  “Don’t worry. I got this,” I tell her, just as the officer knocks on my window.

  I roll it down and smile with relief when I recognize him as a member of Lilah’s class in high school. I rack my brain for his name and manage to siphon it out of my memory.

  “Hey, Luke.” I try my best to come off as nonchalant, but the fogged-up windows aren’t much help. Neither is the smell of sex wafting out, I’m sure.

  Luke’s bored, slightly put-out expression changes to surprised amusement. “Ethan Kase? Well, shit, man! Congrats on the trade. Nice to have you playing on the right team for once.”

  “It’s nice to be home,” I reply, meaning it.

  He holds out his hand and I reach to take it but make a fist instead. “Props might be a better idea. I, uh…need to wash my hands.”

  Lilah slaps me on the arm closest to her and mutters my name. Her eyes are comically wide, face turning an incredible shade of red. Lilah makes a choking sound and goes back to sitting all prim-like, legs crossed over each other, purse clutched in her lap.

  “DJ?” Luke’s smile falters as his eyes flare and understanding dawns.

  She lifts her hand in a wave, voice cracking a little. “Hi, Luke. How’re you?”

  “Good. Yeah. You’re looking…well.” He scratches at the edge of his collar, seeming a little uncomfortable now.

  “Thanks; you’re looking well, too.” She lifts a hand as if she’s going to tuck her hair behind her ear but then thinks better of it. It’s a nervous habit. I’m sure getting caught is part of the reason, but I suspect there’s more, particularly considering the way he’s looking at her—with a mixture of something like possessiveness and disappointment.

  “Job at Fairview going well, then?” he asks tightly. It’s at this moment I remember why I’m not fond of Luke. He had a thing for Lilah in high school. I’m pretty sure he was going to ask her out, but then I made it clear we were a thing, and he had no choice but to back off.

  “Really good. Your sister and I work the same shift sometimes. She’s a real sweetie, great with the patients.”

  He grins. “Yeah, she’s real good at taking care of people, just like you.”

  Okay. I’m about done with the high school–crush, let’s-catch-up chitchat. “What can we do for you, Luke?”

  His attention returns to me, eyes narrowed, lips pressed into a line. “Got a call a little while ago about a truck out here in McFarlane’s field. Said it’d been here a long time, more than half an hour. It’s a popular place for teenagers looking for some privacy. Course you don’t need that, since DJ’s house isn’t far. Guessing you decided to take a trip down memory lane.” His derision makes me bristle.

  “Remember when we all came out here in senior year with those bottles of peach schnapps?” Lilah cuts in, her attempt to calm the testosterone storm raging between us obvious.

  “Got us outta here without getting caught, didn’t I?” He winks.

  Lilah laughs, high, nervous. “Saved me from getting grounded all of second semester! My mom would’ve killed me if she’d known what we were getting up to.”

  Luke’s grin is wide and knowing. “Glad I could rescue you. Otherwise you would’ve missed out on all the best parties.”

  Yeah, this is turning into bullshit. He’s way too familiar with her, and I don’t like that she’s pacifying him. “I guess we should probably get off McFarlane’s property. Don’t want to make the old man angry.”

  “Yeah. Probably wouldn’t look good on you getting a trespassing charge, being a hometown NHL player and all.” He’s smiling, but it’s more of a sneer than anything. He slaps the side panel. “Anyway. Good to see you again, DJ. You know where to find me if you ever need anything.” He throws another wink her way. “See you around, Ethan.”

  “Later, Luke.” I wait until he backs out of the narrow lane and do the same, heading toward town instead of away from it.

  “Wanna tell me what that was all about?” I try to keep my voice even, but I don’t think I’m particularly successful with the way her head snaps up.

  “Excuse me?”

  “Seems like you two have some history.”

  “Is that your indirect way of asking me a specific question, Ethan?”

  I don’t know where the spike of anger comes from, or why I can’t seem to manage it. “Did you date him?”

  I can feel her glare as if it were lasering its way through my cheek. “We hung out in high school during senior year a bit. Mostly in second semester, after you dumped me.”

  “So that’s a yes.”

  “He asked me out before I was ready to date. We went to a few parties as friends, but he wasn’t interested in anything platonic. He gave up and moved on, started dating Stephanie Murphy until she went away to college. By that time I was already with Avery. And then I got married. A few months after Avery and I separated, Luke asked if I wanted to go for coffee, just to talk. I said yes because he’s a nice guy, and I was lonely and needed a friend. We went for coffee a few times, but I just wanted to keep it platonic because I didn’t feel that way about him.”

  “He sure seems to feel that way about you.”

  “He does, and he’s made that very clear, but I couldn’t manufacture feelings for him and I wasn’t in any kind of headspace to start dating. Any more questions?” Her hard tone implies she expects the inquisition to continue, and she’s definitely gearing up for a fight—one I don’t want to have right before I leave for two days. It’s a bad omen, and I don’t want that hanging over my head while I’m away from her, so I back down. “Sorry. No. No more questions.”

  I pull into her driveway, and before I can even shift into park she’s out of the truck and heading up the front walk. I cut the engine and follow after her. Her movements are jerky as she shoves the key in the lock, throwing the door open.

  Merk comes running, tongue lolling and tail wagging. He stuffs his nose right in her crotch. “Stop, Merk.” She gives his head a pat but pushes him away, turning for the stairs.

  “Hey.” I reach out, clasping her wrist to keep her from running away.

  She yanks her arm free and crosses them over her chest. “I need a shower. I’m a mess. Maybe you should go home and do the same.”

  “I’m not going anywhere. I’ll wait until you’ve cleaned up, but I’m not leaving with you mad at me.”

  “I had a life, Ethan. My world kept turning just like yours.”

  “I know you did. I get that.” I run a hand down my face. “I know I’m the one who left and that I ended things. But I won’t lie and tell you it didn’t kill me to know that there was a mile-long line of guys waiting for a chance to ask you out as soon as you were available.”

  “So you figured you’d have a pissing contest with one of them? Luke is a police officer.”

  “That you dated and who’s still interested in you.” That was definitely the wrong thing to say.

  Lilah gives me a hard glare, her teeth clamped together. She runs her finger down the bridge of her nose. Shit. She’s really mad. To the point of tears.

  “That’s not the point, Ethan. We were fucking in the middle of a field, in your truck, like goddamn teenagers!”

  “Are you embarrassed that we got caught, or upset that I acted like an asshole?”

  She throws her hands up in the air. “Both! You acted like a jealous boyfriend.”

  I blow out a breath, trying to figure out how to smooth things over. Truth is probably the best option. “That’s because I am a jealous boyfriend.”

  “There’s nothing to be jealous of.”

  “You can’t tell me he didn’t make a point of rubbing in the fact that there’s history between you, or that he didn’t make it seem like i
t was recent, or maybe even current.”

  Lilah grits her teeth. “I can’t help how he reacts, but you can certainly help the way you do. I stayed here, and you left for almost a decade. I dated. That’s what people do. Or at least I did. I have no idea what the last eight years looked like for you because you’ve never talked about it. I don’t know whether you worked through an endless stream of puck bunnies, or if there was someone you cared about, but I can’t and won’t apologize for any of the relationships I’ve been in while you were off living your life without me.”

  “I’m not asking you to apologize.”

  She crosses her arms over her chest, her frustration gathering steam instead of losing it. “Then what are you asking? You already know I never got over you. Shouldn’t that be enough for you? I’m not interested in Luke. I never really was, not back in high school, and not last year, and definitely not now.”

  I step closer, lift my hand and drag my index finger along the bridge of her nose.

  She bats it away. “What’re you doing? Don’t do that.”

  “I’m trying to calm you down so I can explain myself, and so you’ll actually listen to the words instead of that angry white noise up in your head.”

  “I don’t want you to calm me down! I want to be angry! I have a right to be mad at you.”

  “I totally agree.” I clasp both of her hands in one of mine and bring them to my lips. They smell a whole lot like sex. This fire, her refusal to back down, is something I’m glad she never lost. “Do you remember the first time I kissed you?”

  “Of course I remember. What does this have to do with anything?”

  “I’m getting to that. Do you remember what precipitated that kiss?”

  Lilah shrugs. “I don’t know. You were in a bad mood. We were walking home from school through the forest, and you just laid one on me. I hadn’t been expecting it.”

  It’s amazing how memories shift and change with time, or how one person’s recollection of events varies so greatly from another.

  “You were wearing jeans and a button-down shirt that was a purple, green, and black plaid. The first three buttons were undone and the black camisole underneath came down a little low, so you had to constantly adjust it to avoid flashing cleavage.”

  “Is there a point to this?”

  “Yes.”

  “Wanna get to it, then?”

  I smile at her irritation. Before she can go off on me for continuing to be a jerk, I press on. “You were standing in front of the school, waiting for me. I remember thinking how beautiful you were and how unaware you seemed to be about all the attention that outfit was getting you, how many guys I’d had to stare down between classes, how freaked out I was because all the stupid posters for the Halloween dance had gone up that day, and you were so damn excited to go to your first high school dance.”

  I can see the moment when the memories start to click into place for her. “I was talking to Luke.”

  I nod. “I interrupted right when he was asking if you were going to the dance.”

  “You came up behind me and scared the crap out of me.”

  “That’s right.” I did a lot more than that. I’d staked a claim when I’d come up behind her, wrapped an arm around her waist, and lifted her off the ground while I stared Luke down. My expression had said everything. She’s mine. Don’t even think about it. “When we were walking home, all I could think about was how some guy was going to get the balls to ask you to go to that dance and how I’d have to kill him. And that was the moment I realized I was in love with you, and there was no way I was letting anyone come between us.”

  She’d been chattering about the dance and costumes, hands flailing wildly, eyes alight with excitement. She’d asked if I was going to go, and when I shrugged, I’d wiped the joy right off her face. I wanted to put it back, so I suggested we go together. She’d stopped, hope quickly overshadowed by uncertainty. And I saw, for the first time, that this love I’d had for her all these years had morphed into something deeper for both of us. So I’d kissed her.

  It changed everything.

  “I’m going to be traveling a lot starting tomorrow. Luke brought back a lot of memories, and with them, insecurities. I want this with you, Lilah. I want this feeling, your fire; I want us to work this time, and I’m worried that not being here as often is going to make that difficult. So I acted like a jealous jerk, because I am one.”

  Lilah drops her head, but a smile and a soft laugh follow. “Your apologies are always so elaborate.”

  “I think my behavior required an elaborate apology. I don’t want to leave tomorrow with you misunderstanding my reaction. I won’t make the same mistakes I did last time, Lilah—I promise.”

  I pull her closer and wrap my arm around her waist. She comes willingly at first, but she puts a hand on my chest and pushes away, wearing a grimace. “Oh my God. My dress is crunchy. I really need to get out of these clothes.”

  “I would be more than willing to help with that.”

  She laughs, her anger having abated. “Of course you would.”

  “We could consider it penance.”

  She rolls her eyes but takes my hand, tugging me toward the stairs.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Gamble

  Ethan

  I feel like I’m standing in a minefield, when what I should be doing is celebrating. With Lilah. Naked. We won our exhibition game against Colorado.

  Unfortunately, when I arrived in Minneapolis, I had a message from Lilah that she was at my parents’ house babysitting my dad while my mom went out for dinner with a friend.

  He’s in a shit mood and he’s watching a recording of the exhibition game. I’m on edge. I don’t want him to pick apart my performance. I scored a goal. I should be happy about that, but now all I can do is brace for some snide comment I’m sure is coming.

  I jam a pair of jeans, boxers, and a T-shirt into my duffel, throw in my toiletries bag—I have duplicates of most things at Lilah’s, but I like to have it just in case—and toss the duffel over my shoulder. We won’t leave until my mom gets back, so I figure I can get in a quick swim before we go, since the summer weather seems to be holding for a while longer. I’m sure Lilah would be more than happy to escape Eeyore moping in the lounger.

  I climb the stairs, dressed in a pair of board shorts, pausing at the top when the game goes to a commercial and my dad looks to Lilah, who’s stretched out on the couch, a pen tucked behind her ear, tapping her lip with a yellow highlighter. She’s wearing a gauzy skirt and a pale tank with wide straps.

  “What’re you doing?” my dad asks in his slow, garbled speech. He has to work on fine motor control to fast-forward through commercials, or wait for the show to come back on. Apparently he’s not in the mood for TV remote physio.

  It takes her a second or two before she looks up and smiles. “Statistics homework. Remember I told you I’m taking a course?”

  My dad nods, then taps on the arm of his chair as he clears his throat. “You should’ve been a doctor.”

  I step into the living room, the floorboard under my foot creaking. “Dad!”

  He glances over his shoulder at me, face ticking as his mouth tries to catch up with his brain. “’S true.” He motions from Lilah to me. “Botha you.”

  This has been the hardest part to get used to since the stroke. My dad has always felt free to speak his mind, but now, in addition to his lack of censor, he’s also tactless, and sometimes the things he says are unnecessarily hurtful.

  “I enjoy nursing. I like that I get time with the patients and their families,” Lilah replies, an edge in her otherwise serene tone.

  My dad taps his temple, then points at me, while still focused on Lilah. “This one wasted his brain.”

  “That’s enough, Martin,” Lilah snaps. “That’s not even remotely true. Just because Ethan didn’t follow in your footsteps doesn’t mean he wasted anything. You’re being cruel for no other reason than you’re in a bad mood. If y
ou can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.”

  “He should’ve stayed.” My dad jabs at the couch with a finger, still focused on Lilah, mouth moving as he fights to string the syllables together. “Stay. For you.”

  I bark out a laugh. “Well, that’s rich, considering you’re the one who told me to break up with Lilah in the first place, or don’t you remember that conversation?”

  “So you stay!” he shouts.

  “What? You’re not even making sense, Dad. You’re the one who pushed me to end things. You said it would be selfish for me to leave her here and keep her tied to me.”

  He slaps the arm of his lounger, more agitated than I’ve seen him in a long time. “No! I-I-I…” He blinks furiously, struggling harder because he’s so upset. “Th-thought you would stay. For DJ. Not go.”

  The shock of this revelation is a punch in the chest. “You told me to do one thing and expected me to do the opposite?”

  “You ne’er listened to me!”

  My father and I had always been at odds with each other, especially when I was a teenager. I spent all my time at the hockey rink, and he pushed me toward a career in medicine. When I made the NHL, instead of sharing my excitement, he wanted to know what I was going to do afterward, since I’d likely be retired by my midthirties. We’re very much alike, and because of that we argued a lot. But this is…more than I can handle, especially with how good things have been with me and Lilah recently. “Well, that was a pretty shitty fucking gamble, wasn’t it?”

  “It cost you eight years.” It’s the clearest sentence my dad has spoken in the weeks since his stroke.

  I glance at Lilah’s wide eyes and pale face. I feel the weight of this admission in my bones. All the time I lost with her because I listened to my father the one time I shouldn’t have, and then I did it again when I had the chance to come back for her. I don’t understand why he would chance something like that.

  “Time wasn’t the only thing it cost me.” If I stay in here, I’m going to go off on him, say things I can’t take back, so I look to Lilah. “It’s been a long day. I’m going down to the lake for a quick swim. When my mom gets back, we can go.” I punch through the screen door. It slams roughly behind me, the hinges rattling. The porch boards shake beneath my feet, and guilt at leaving Lilah in there to deal with him makes me pause when I reach the grass.