By the time they rolled the crate up against the second gate, the sun was high, and the Texas heat had stopped being friendly. Danica had everyone clear the area and stand outside the enclosure. She and Reid were the only people inside, ready to let the cat into his new home. Dr. Ortiz stood next to the tall fence with a tranquilizer if they needed it.
Danica jumped on top of the crate. She looked like an Amazon queen, surveying her land. She was born to do this. Twisting around, she looked at Reid. “I’m going to lift the front panel. He’ll either dart out and run, or hide in there. We’ll have to wait for him to enter his new world.” Easing down, she laid her body flat on the top of the crate and peered into the openings. In a low, soothing voice, she started talking to the animal.
“What do you need me to do?” Reid kept his voice steady and calm as he checked on the black jaguar from the side panel.
“Stay to the back of the crate until he moves out the front. As soon as he leaves, I need you to slide and secure the gate so he can’t come back into this area. I’ll roll it out of the way.”
She sprang to her feet. “By nature, they want to avoid humans, so he should run for the trees. Okay, here we go.” Giving Reid a nod, she got in position.
Poised for action, he kept his full attention on her. It would be safer for her on the outside fence area with the others, but he knew better than to suggest it.
Danica pulled the panel up. Nothing happened. Reid pressed his face against the top slot to see inside. The cat had his nose in the air and took one cautious step toward the opening. Then he stopped and just stared out.
Slowly slipping down to the ground, Danica stood next to him. He was tall, and her lips were close to his ear when she leaned in. “All he’s known is captivity, his whole life. The open space probably scares him.”
“Freedom can be overwhelming.” He had only been locked up six years and was surprised how hard it was to adjust. Facing freedom after a whole life of being in a cage had to be paralyzing.
She nodded. With the palm of her hand, she wiped at her face. Reid pretended not to notice. Her warrior face was back, as she focused on the jaguar.
The cat eased closer to the opening and once again sat and put his nose in the air. He turned around and went to the back of his shelter again.
“No. Go. Run,” Danica whispered. “There are rocky cliffs and trees for you to climb and explore. You’re safe here.”
The cat paced again and stopped at the door. His ears twitched. Reid stopped breathing for a few seconds as he waited for the cat to claim his freedom.
Danica slid her hand into his. Reid heard her praying under her breath. She was so focused on the jag he doubted she even noticed. He resisted the urge to squeeze, hoping she would stay. If this caged and abused wild animal could make it, maybe he had a chance, too.
It took almost an hour for the cat to get his whole body out of the crate. Suddenly he stood straight. With a flip of his tail, he lifted his head high, and his nostrils flared. He looked over his shoulder, then back again. With a lunge, he ran for the tree line.
Danica pulled the crate back. “Lock the gate.”
He had gotten so caught up holding her hand and watching the cat, he almost forgot his job. The small group behind them started applauding. The black cat reappeared and darted across the open grass, running straight back into the fence. Panting, he stopped and went flat. Danica held her hand up, and everyone went silent.
Reid hated seeing the big cat in distress. “Should we let him back in the crate? He doesn’t feel safe in the open space.”
With narrowed eyes, she kept her focus on the cat. “He’s okay. Let’s give him a bit more time.” The animal’s golden eyes scanned the land. Lying flat on his stomach, he crept back to the tree line.
One swish of his tail and he turned back to the trees. One leap and he climbed onto the low branch of a giant oak. Danica looked at him with a huge smile. “I think he’s going to adjust fast.” Hands on the crate, she unlocked the brakes and started rolling it toward the volunteers. They rushed forward to help her.
“That was so exciting, Ms. Bergmann. Will he be able to find the water and his food?”
“I think so. We’ll keep an eye on him to make sure he does. The more he does on his own, the better.” Danica gave the small crew directions. Dr. Ortiz hugged her, then got in her fancy vet truck and left.
Reid stood back. They all laughed and talked about the excitement of setting the cat free. Everyone had a job and knew what to do. A touch on his left shoulder caused him to spin with his fists up for a split second before he saw it was Danica. “Sorry.” He stuffed his hands in his back pockets. “I didn’t know you were behind me.” He hated the pity that clouded her eyes.
“I didn’t even think about how—”
“I’m fine. What do you need me to do?” Relaxing his jaw, he focused on his breathing. Once back to normal, he looked down at the beautiful woman who had looked at him with love a lifetime ago. The tender gaze was gone—now it shifted from suspicion to pity. She had a don’t-get-close look he’d never seen before.
Even though he was free now, he felt as if he’d suffered a lifetime conviction. Ray said it was a self-induced sentence, which God had released him from. Now that he had his physical freedom, all the guilt and stress were back. He didn’t feel free anymore.
“Reid?” Her bright green eyes searched his face. He forced himself to be still, to meet her gaze. She gave him a sad smile and nodded as if they had agreed to something he wasn’t aware of. “Are you ready to move the baby cub to the enclosure? I don’t want a crowd for that.”
Right now, he would love to get away from this group of young, energetic college students. It seemed a lifetime ago that he had been a part of that life. If he heard the words awesome or amazing one more time, he was going to beat his head against the side of the truck.
Then there was Bobby. The old man eyed Reid with a warning whenever he got a chance. “Is there anything else needed done here?”
“Are you sure you’re okay?” Her forehead wrinkled with worry, and it was his fault.
With a nod, he gave her the lopsided grin she’d always loved. “Yes. Ready for the next adventure.”
She waved to the others. “We’re heading back to introduce the cub to her new home. Y’all take the truck. Sarah, do you have the phone today?”
“Yes, ma’am. Can we come watch?”
“I want to keep the environment calm and quiet when we make the transition. I need y’all to finish here and do the usual rounds. We’ll take the four-wheeler back to headquarters.” Without waiting for him, she jumped on the long leather seat of the ATV. Hands on the handlebars, she leaned forward, making room for him behind her. If he got on that thing, he would have to touch her. Not good.
“Baby, I’ll walk.”
“What? It’ll take you an hour to get back.” She started the engine. “Do you want to drive? Is that the problem? I don’t remember you being so macho.”
Okay, he was making a bigger deal out of this than it needed to be. Swinging a leg over, he slid as far back on the seat as possible. Trying to settle in behind Danica, he found there wasn’t much room to avoid her. Her hair was in a tight braid, but a few curls had managed to escape. He could get lost in her hair. Looking to the sky, he kept his focus on the clouds above. His hands gripped the bars next to his legs. A rock in the road caused the four-wheeler to tilt to the side.
Without thought, his fingers immediately circled her waist to steady them both. Muscles briefly contracted as he remembered how perfectly she fit in his hands. Those hands needed to be somewhere else.
One quick movement and he had a tight grip on the bars again. Those were the kind of memories that would get him in trouble and just cause him more pain. He needed to block all of them.
How could he do that? He remembered everything about her, and he
would until the day his heart stopped beating. He imagined it was possible that even beyond this life, he would remember her. Not that it would do him any good. He was dancing in the middle of a stampede and would be going down soon.
This quick ride turned into a torture trip. Next time, he would walk. God, I need strength only You can give. I have vowed to do the right thing, but I’m not sure I’m strong enough.
* * *
Parking the four-wheeler by the back door, Danica jumped off as fast as she turned the key to shut down the engine. She needed to get away from Reid.
Driving with him so close, it took her back to the early days of their marriage. Their very short marriage, because he didn’t have enough faith to believe God would take care of them.
“I need to check something up front. Go ahead and get the cub ready.”
Not waiting for his response, she moved to the front porch. She had to get herself under control. Emotions and feelings had gotten her in trouble in college. Now she was a grown woman with two innocent baby girls relying on her. Their future was at stake. God, I need You to lead me this time.
It didn’t matter how Reid McAllister made her feel. Her heart was off-limits, and she needed to use her brain. Coming around the corner, she stopped midstep. No, no, no.
“Momma!”
“Momma, we came to see the baby bear.”
The girls charged at her. “We want to see the bats. Can we see the bats? Are they sleeping like little burritos?”
There was no pause between the girls. They had a habit of talking with their words flowing from one sister to the next.
Her gaze darted behind her. Reid had gone into the building. With her heart in her throat, she stared at her twin sister. “Jackie, what are you doing here? I told the girls I would bring them later tonight.”
Jackie narrowed her gaze. “What’s going on?”
With another quick glance to the house, she took a deep breath. Maybe she could get them out of here without him seeing the girls. She bit her lip.
“Momma, please.”
Or before her sister saw him. This was crazy. Smiling for the girls, she took a deep breath. No time to drown in her own mess.
Balancing on her heels, she squatted and hugged each girl. “I need you to go home with your aunt.” She pushed the loose curls out of their faces, their red hair and gray-green eyes in contrast to their light golden skin.
They were a perfect mix of her and Reid. “You can’t be here right now. I promise I’ll bring you back, and you can help me feed the baby bats tonight.” She usually only allowed the girls to watch the bats. At this point, she was willing to use anything to get them back in the big green family Suburban her father still owned. Standing, she placed a hand on each of the girls’ shoulders and started herding them back to the SUV.
Jackie was frowning at her. “They both got a hundred on their spelling tests, so I thought this—”
“It’s fine. I just need you to take them home. I still have a lot to do today.”
A door behind her opened. Her sister gasped. Dread froze the rapid flow of her blood. Fear held her in place. Her two worlds were about to collide. “Please, get the twins to the car and leave.” Please, please, please don’t let him notice the girls.
“Jackie?” His deep voice vibrated down her spine.
“Reid?” Jackie’s screech was more like nails on a chalkboard. Eyes wide, she looked at Danica. “Is that Reid McAllister?”
The girls turned to see the newcomer. “Hi!” They tended to talk in unison when they were excited. “I’m Susan Bergmann this is my sister—”
“Elizabeth Bergmann. Everyone calls us Suzie and Lizzy. We’re twins.”
Focusing on her daughters, she kept her back to Reid. Maybe he’d assume they were Jackie’s if he didn’t look too close.
Lizzy gently pressed her fingertips on Danica’s face and pulled her attention away from Jackie. “Momma, please let us just see the bats. We won’t touch them.”
She groaned and closed her eyes.
“Or even make a noise. We promise to be real quiet.” On her other side, Suzie wrapped herself around Danica’s arm.
“Yes, we’ll be good.” They both looked past her and smiled at Reid. “Have you seen the bats?” Suzie faced him.
“We were here when they came to the sanctuary.” Excitement bubbled from each of Lizzy’s words.
“They were the size of our thumbs.” Both girls held up their thumbs and giggled.
Danica’s lungs burned. She took in a deep breath. She needed to breathe. Passing out was not an option. On second thought, it would be a great distraction and buy her some time.
She finally turned to face Reid. His gaze was on the girls, darting back and forth between her wiggling, joy-filled babies. Lizzy had grabbed her hand. “Momma, please just one peek.”
Tearing her gaze away from the shock on Reid’s face, she looked down. “Sweetheart, we have some real important things going on right now. I need you to go home with Aunt Jackie. I’ll bring you back tonight for the late-night feeding.”
Jackie stepped forward and took the girls by the hand. “Come on, sugars. The sooner your mom gets her work done, the faster she’ll come get you.” She glanced at Reid, then back to Danica. “Are you okay? Do I need to call anyone?”
“No. Really, I’m good. Reid is here to help.” Crossing her arms, she swallowed back any tears that would expose the desperation she was trying to hide. “Call me once you’re in the car if you want, and I’ll let you know when to expect me.”
Her sister hesitated. “Bobby’s here?”
“Yes, along with Stephanie and a couple of interns. We just released the cat, lots of people are here. I’m good.”
Watching her daughters leave with her sister, her gut burned. Maybe he’d go away if she ignored him. She felt him move next to her. His breathing was hard enough to brush her unprotected neck. Closing her eyes, she prayed, with every bit of energy in her body. If she could, she would drop to her knees.
She did not want to deal with this.
“I’m a father? Why didn’t—”
She turned on him, her fingertip against his chest. “You, Reid McAllister, are not a father. You made me a mother, then you left. That does not make you a father. Don’t you dare try to act like the victim here.” Heat ran through her limbs.
Devastation flared in his eyes. Years ago, he shared dreams of forging a family with her, the type of family he had only seen on television. Reid had talked about being the kind of father he’d wanted to be, a good father. He’d wanted to do things differently than his parents.
At the time, she was foolish enough to believe him.
Danica stared him down, the gray in his eyes glossed over until only a dark green burned. So let him get angry. She didn’t care. Her rage heaved and pulled against the shackles she’d locked it under years ago.
Her finger thrust against his rock-hard chest. “I waited for you.” Her voice shook. She squared her shoulders. “When I took the first pregnancy test, I was alone. I’ve been alone every step of the way, except for my family. My girls are Bergmanns, and that’s all they know. You showing up on my doorstep does not change the fact they don’t have a father. They never did, and they’re fine, better than fine. They have my father. The kind of man I want them to know.”
Mouth open, he didn’t say a word. Deep in the back of his throat, his voice emerged. “They’re mine.”
“No. You gave up that right when you decided it was easier just to vanish than tell me what was happening. I’m not talking to you about them.” Unable to deal with his self-inflicted wounds any longer, she marched past him and into the office. Slamming the door felt better than it should.
She didn’t have time for this drama or his wounded pride. “He should have thought of that before he drove a suspicious car across state line
s.”
“Who are you talking to?”
Stephanie’s voice caused her to jump. She forced a laugh. “Just myself.” She looked around. “Where is everyone? What are you doing in my office?”
“Oh, they’re putting everything away, and Sarah is checking on the bats. I wanted to get the updates on the paperwork.” She leaned her perfectly dressed hip on the corner of the worn, outdated desk. “How are we looking financially?”
Danica moved past her and bit down on the inside of her cheek. This was not what she wanted to deal with right now. “We have a board meeting soon. I’ll be able to give a full report then.”
“I spoke with Dorothy. As your friends and board members, we’re worried. Do we have enough money to hire a vet tech?” Stephanie started looking through some photos Danica had taken for the grant. “He’s a convicted criminal. Is it smart to have him around so many drugs and exotic animals?”
“He needs community hours, and we need him for the grant. James trusts him. Sorry I don’t have time to go deeper, but I have lots of work that still needs to be done before the end of the day.”
Her temper was on the edge of exploding, but it wasn’t Stephanie’s fault. Plus, she really couldn’t afford to be rude to her. Not only was she Linda’s only living relative, but she stood by her side as a major advocate for the sanctuary.
“I’m sorry. I know your aunt’s dream for this place is as important to you as it is to me. But right now, I don’t have time. I promise I have a report, and I will answer all of your questions then.” She took a breath. “Thank you for helping today. I know you also have a busy schedule with your law firm.”
“Danica, are we going to move the cub?” Reid stood at her door. He wasn’t looking at her, though. He seemed to be staring at Stephanie.
“Seems the felon needs you. Shouldn’t leave him unattended for long. I have to go anyway. I’ll see you at the board meeting.” She ignored Reid as she went out the other door.
The Texan's Twins Page 4