Danica swallowed, or tried to anyway. The ball of fear and worry hung in her dry throat. She shouldn’t have rushed Stephanie out. Maybe she could call Bobby, so someone would be between her and Reid.
“I’ll be with the cub.” Not giving her a chance to reply, Reid turned on his booted heel and left.
Bracing her hands on the edge of the desk, she hung her head. “God, please give me the wisdom to handle this the best way for the girls.” Her wounded heart wanted to lash out at him and make him pay, but that wouldn’t help anyone. As good as it would feel to scream and throw breakables against his head, she knew it would just destroy her in the long haul. More guilt was the last thing she needed right now.
With a deep breath, she turned to face the door leading to Reid and the baby bear. There was no reason for her to feel guilty. For six years, she’d stayed strong. God had been preparing her for this day. Danica swallowed any emotions that might give him an opening to her heart and stepped into the room with her husband.
Chapter Four
Reid held the bottle as the baby bear clung to him. He took a deep breath, pushing his lungs past their comfort zone. Releasing all the tension, he counted to five. Held it. Again.
It wasn’t working.
No matter how he tried to center his breathing, the word daughters bounced around in his head. The double image of the most beautiful sight he’d ever seen ricocheted in his thoughts.
Two curly-red-haired girls. He had two daughters with the same color of eyes as his mother. Two daughters who were already five years old. Five years he could never get back. Anger threatened to abolish all his good intentions.
Danica was right. He’d walked out on her when she needed him most. He’d ruined his own life. A life that not only shined with Danica as his wife but two precious girls who...
His family had ridiculed him for trying to make a better life, for reaching over his head for things that belonged to other people. Not him.
The night he was arrested they had been proven right. There was no escaping his family blood.
But daughters? What did he do with that information? Even after seeing them, he still couldn’t believe it. He wanted to yell and hit something.
He stroked the bear’s fur and looked down, into her trusting eyes. Centering his thoughts and turning to God was what he needed to do now.
As much as he wanted to blame Danica, he couldn’t. The mistake was his, and now he had a great deal to prove to her.
The rocking chair creaked as it rolled back and forth. Reid leaned his head back. The peeling paint on the old wood panel revealed decades of colors just painted on top of each other. It needed to be sanded and repainted. No one had ever taken the time to do the job right. Layers of paint had been slapped onto each other, covering the old stains.
If she had the supplies to make repairs, he could work on restoring the old wood. Words were not going to regain the trust he’d lost. It was going to take a lot of work and time to show her he could be counted on.
His mother had put her husband above her children. Each time his father got out of prison, his mother took him back, no questions asked. A corner of his lip twitched as he looked down at the bear. “Danica made it clear I wasn’t getting anywhere near her babies. I think she might be the definition of mama bear.”
“Are you talking to the bear?” Not making eye contact, Danica marched across the room. She gave no indication she had actually heard what he said.
“No one else will talk to me.”
A snort came from her as she pulled bottles and assorted supplies out of the cabinets. “When you finish with the feeding, we’ll move her out to the enclosure.” With jerky fast motions, she stuffed them in the bag. “I’ll wait in the Jeep that’s parked out back.” Without a glance at him, she flung the bag over her back and left.
Standing, he cleared his thoughts and prepared himself for her proximity again. He didn’t want to put the bear back in the traveling crate, so he carried her out the door.
With the bear sleeping like a baby in his arms, he joined a silent Danica and carefully closed the door. Slowly, she maneuvered the Jeep over uneven roads. By the time she put the vehicle in Park, the sun was low on the horizon. In the far side of the sky, a large moon was already making its climb.
Taking a moment to collect his thoughts, Reid sat in the Jeep. The moon was one of many little things he’d taken for granted before he was locked up. In his arms, the sleeping cub made a few grunting noises. He wondered how his babies slept. Did they snore? Did they wake up all through the night or sleep without a care in the world?
Monumental everyday life moments he’d lost forever.
The gate to the closed-in area was wide-open. Reid got out of the Jeep and walked into the bear’s new home, closing the gate behind him. It was a hundred times larger than the cage in the basement. Even bigger than his cell.
Danica stopped in front of the Jeep and went through her bag. “It won’t take long to get her settled. Then I’ll have Bobby take you home.” Busy movements took her around the enclosure and into a shed that was a few feet away. Finally, she stilled and stood a distance from the fence as if afraid of him.
A pressure tightened in the center of his chest. He pushed past it and cleared his throat. “We need to talk.”
Danica had all the power here, and she knew it. His heart twisted. She made it clear she was going to ignore him as she checked the bag again.
“I’m not asking you to tell them I’m their father.” He needed to find a way to explain his intentions. God, help me. This was tough. The desire to run and hide pulled on every nerve. But he needed to take a stand and face what he feared. “I want to know them. An opportunity to show you I can be trusted. I want a chance to—”
“No!”
He pressed his lips tight. She was the mother of his children. The kind of mother who would protect her children from the corruption in the world, even if that included him.
Danica was so much stronger than his mother.
“Danica. I know I messed up.” He moved to the hammock, planning to place the small cub into the cocoon. It was easier to talk to her if he didn’t make eye contact. “I took something precious, and I crushed it.” The bear’s eyes went half-mast. He made sure to relax his hold and regulate his breathing. “But I’ve seen our girls. I can’t undo that.” Steel chains seized his lungs, and his eyes burned. “Tell me what you want, and I’ll do it. Just let me see them. They don’t have to know who I am. I understand you’re protecting them. I...” He couldn’t even express how much that meant to him.
“Because of you, I’m stronger than I ever thought I could be. You leaving forced me to be independent and focus on what matters. I didn’t have the luxury to fall apart.” She crossed her arms as if a chill had swept through her.
The hills to the west received her full attention. “The pain you caused? It hurt beyond what I thought possible to survive. I lost my mother, my grandparents. My oldest sister had left us, and then you, but when I found out about my babies...”
With a tight fist, she tapped her heart. “I had to turn all that pain into faith and love. You broke me, but when I pulled everything back together, I found a woman who can stand on her own. I don’t need anyone.”
Anger and pride stiffening her spine, Danica looked him straight in the eye. The green irises burned bright, but not with the love he’d remembered for the last six years.
“I can’t have you in my life. My daughters don’t need a man who will walk out on them without warning. I don’t trust you.”
The desire to hold Danica, to comfort her, shredded him. He had done this to her. “Danica. I’m sorry.”
“You need to let her go. The longer she stays around humans, the harder it will be for her to adjust.” She moved back to the Jeep.
“If I had to do it over again, I’d call you and tell
you everything. If I got to do it over, I’d never take the job.” He eased the baby into the hammock and studied the rescued animal as she settled. “When is their birthday? Tell me that at least.”
Hunger for any information about them clawed at his gut. A long heavy pause lingered. Not able to take the silence any longer, he turned. She wasn’t even looking at him. She placed her hands on the hood of the white Jeep, gazing out at the surrounding hills.
“Are they in school?” The burn of venom crawled up from the back of his throat. Six years of memories lost. “Danica, they’re my daughters. I have some rights. Is my name on their birth certificates?”
Fire flared in her eyes as she grew taller and marched to the chain-link fence that separated them. A hostile finger pointed at him. “You don’t have any rights when it comes to my girls.” Her breaths came in quick pants.
A few steps and he stood before her. He gripped the interlocking chains. The edge cut into his skin. “I don’t want to fight you, but I can’t act as if I don’t know that I have children. You know I vowed to be a present father. I have to be a better father than mine.”
“Then you should have stayed out of prison I guess.” The starch left her spine. Pulling her jacket tight around her, she looked away.
The dying sunlight seemed to set her hair on fire. The shades of golden red radiated warmth. She turned, heading to the Jeep. Reid panicked.
The bear habitat closed in on him. He rattled the fence. “Danica! Don’t leave me!”
“I’ll call Bobby and tell him to take you home.” She disappeared on the other side of the Jeep.
In his fear, Reid had forgotten he could unlock the gate and walk out. He flipped the latch and followed her. “We have to talk about this.”
She kept walking, but it didn’t take many steps for him to catch up with her.
Danica held her phone up. Reid assumed she was looking for a signal. Moving to the other side of the road, she paused again. “I’m not even thinking.” The walkie-talkie was pulled off her hip. “Bobby, meet us by the bear enclosure. Reid is ready to leave.”
“Be there in ten.”
He had ten minutes to find out something, anything about his girls. “What do they know about me?”
She climbed into the Jeep, slamming the door. That was it. Danica was going to leave him out here without even the smallest fact about his daughters.
He rushed to open the passenger door. “I just want to know their birthday. Can I have that much?”
Hands on the wheel, jaw clenched, she turned and glared at him. “They were born February 14. Your very last Valentine’s gift to me. Now shut the door.”
She turned the key. “Bobby’s on his way. He’ll pick you up tomorrow, too. You’ll work with him. I would appreciate it if you stayed away from me. It’s the least you can do.”
Shifting gears, she barely gave him time to shut the door and move back. She hit the gas, throwing pebbles and dirt into the air. A few might have pelted him, but he didn’t notice.
He watched her drive away as he stood alone on a dark country road like an idiot. For most people, February 14 was Valentine’s Day. But it was so much more for them.
When he finally worked up the nerve to ask her out as kids in school, Valentine’s Day. Their first kiss, Valentine’s Day. One year later, she’d lifted him out of darkness when she whispered she loved him. On Valentine’s Day, their junior year, he’d asked if she’d be his and spend the rest of her life as his wife.
Despite her family’s protests, she’d trusted him. She’d run away from everything she’d known to marry him in Vegas.
Now, he felt lost, trying to process the fact that one year after promising to love and cherish her, Danica had given birth to their babies. Alone.
Happy Valentine’s Day.
The hole in his heart grew bigger. At this rate, the regrets of his life would fill all of Texas.
Chapter Five
“I can’t believe he has the nerve to show up here.” Jackie scooted closer to her on the pew. As always, they sat on the third bench. Her family never sat anywhere else, ever. Even on the rare occasion they were late, the pews were left open for them.
No need to look over her shoulder to see who her twin was horrified to see. Sweat beaded under her shirt. She resisted the urge to fan herself. What was he doing here?
“He’s walking down the center aisle. Wait. He stopped. He’s looking around.” Jackie spoke the play-by-play through clenched teeth.
Danica stopped breathing for a moment. She frantically searched the sanctuary. The girls had left for children’s church. Her father! Where was her father?
“Who’s here?” Sammi sat on the opposite side. Her little sister didn’t know what was going on. She twisted around.
Danica put her hand on her sister’s leg. “Don’t look back there.”
Sammi gasped. “Is that—”
“Hush!” Head down, Danica relaxed her hands.
Her oldest sister, Nikki, moved into the pew in front of them with her husband, Adrian. With a narrowed gaze, her brother-in-law stared at them. “What’s wrong?”
Sammi put her hand on the back of the board in front of her and leaned forward. “I might be imaging things, but I think that’s Reid McAllister.” She turned to Danica. “That’s him, right? Did you know he was in town?”
Nikki’s gaze darted between them and Reid in the back of the church. Confusion seeped into her older sister’s expression. “The father of the twins?” Nikki hadn’t been around when Reid came home with her from college, so she didn’t understand the history like her other sisters did.
As one, her family turned around. Her stupid heart missed a beat when she saw him standing alone. He had the look of a trapped animal, not knowing whether to run or fight. He had his black cowboy hat in front of him, the brim crushed in his grip.
On the other side of her, Jackie lowered her head and leaned in closer. “Not only is he here in town, but he’s working at Danica’s animal rescue place.”
“What!” Sammi’s eyes went wide. People started staring at them.
Stiff, Danica faced forward. “Shh.” This conversation needed to end.
Adrian shifted to get a better look at them and the back of the church. “Wait. The twins’ father is in town working for you, and you haven’t told anyone?” He looked back at Danica. “Is he here to cause trouble for the girls?”
Danica closed her eyes to stop the urge to seek Reid out. “No.”
“He didn’t even know about the girls until I messed up and took them out to the ranch without talking to Danica. He saw them.”
Adrian now looked as confused as Nikki, and a little angry. “You never told him you were pregnant?”
Jackie gave him a hard look and put her hand on Danica’s shoulder. “He left her before she even knew. He just showed up and told her he’s been in prison.”
“What!” Sammi sat straight up.
“Shh.” This time, they all shushed her. People filing into the church looked over at them.
Her family looked at her with different levels of shock, except for Jackie.
Her twin had gone back to glaring at Reid. Danica wanted to hide under the pew. “Can we not talk about this right now? The girls don’t know, and I would prefer it if no one else knew until I figure out what to do.”
“What about Daddy? He’s going to have a fit if he sees Reid. That man doesn’t have any right to be here. He needs to leave now.” Jackie shot a hot glare to the back.
“You can’t kick him out of a church. This is God’s house. He has every right to be here.” Danica didn’t want to have any soft feelings for him, but if he really found God in prison, it wasn’t for her to judge where he worshipped.
Two of her sisters were about to give their opinion when Mia, Adrian’s daughter, joined them. She hugged her father�
��s neck.
Danica touched Mia’s arm. “Hey, sweetheart. Do me a big favor and find the twins. Just take them straight to children’s church. Okay? After service, we’ll all go to The Drug Store for lunch.”
Mia stood and looked at them. Flipping her braid back over her shoulder, she nodded. “Sure. Is everything okay?”
Adrian smiled and nodded. “Yeah. We just need to make sure the girls stay out of the sanctuary right now. I’ll explain later.”
With a quick kiss, she was gone.
Gripping her Bible, Danica kept her head down. “There’s no way to keep Daddy out of here.” She was going to be sick.
“This is ridiculous.” Jackie put a hand on Danica’s knee. “I’m going to tell him to move on down the road. There are like eight churches in this tiny town. He can go find God in one of those.”
“Please don’t. A scene at church is the last thing I need.”
Jackie shook her head. “And you think when Daddy walks in here and sees him, there’s not going to be fireworks?”
Nikki stood. “I’m going to talk to our church visitor and make sure he understands what’s what.” Without waiting for permission, she stood and marched straight down the aisle. Her military training radiated from every movement.
Adrian got up to follow. “Don’t worry, I’ll make sure she behaves.” He patted Danica’s hand, which now had a death grip on the back of the pew.
She forced herself to relax. If she didn’t turn it into a big deal, then no one would even notice.
The youngest Bergmann sister sat back and crossed her arms. “Were you even going to tell me?”
Danica focused on the painting behind the baptismal. The mural of a tranquil Frio River stared back at her, painted by her grandmother five decades ago. Gram was gone now, but the love she had for her family and community lingered. What would she tell her to do?
Sammi turned again to watch the drama unfold behind them. She pressed her shoulder against Danica’s as she whispered, “Pastor Levi is taking Reid to meet Lorrie Ann and Maggie.”
The Texan's Twins Page 5