Bite & Release

by CORY CYR

  Chapter THIRTY-THREE

  We spent the next few weeks with me getting the house together and deciding on how we wanted to remodel the bedroom. Shea studied hard to pass his upcoming tests. He had decided to add two extra nights to his school schedule in order to get his degree faster. After almost five years of part-time night school, he was ready to get his license. He had talked to me many times about taking over Dr. Hansen’s practice when he retired. Shea would have to get a licensed Veterinary doctor to work with him, but that would only be until he had enough of hours, both practical and education wise, to get his own license.

  It made me happy that Shea had a goal in his life. His path was set, our house was coming along, and my divorce was heading towards being final. We had all talked about my dad’s estate lawyer and decided not to alter it, because doing so would cause too many problems and too many people might talk. I had already received my check and so did Shea. He immediately signed it over to Trina. Both Trina and Shea decided the best use of the money would be to get her mom help. Trina had found an assisted living facility close by that was really nice.

  Shea would only visit his mom with Trina; he never went alone. I think his mother’s betrayal, regardless of the reasons, weighed heavily on his mind, and he was too much of a man to let me help him carry that burden, so I worried that he would allow all of his emotions to fester. It had taken some real convincing on both Trina’s and Shea’s part to get her to go. Evie finally relented and had been relocated to the assisted living facility Glacier Manor for the last twelve days. We all had decided that it was in Evie’s best interests that she would never know that we knew the truth. It really served no purpose, and she was too mentally impaired to acknowledge the past.

  Trina and I were working into our new relationship as sisters. I knew Trina was happy with the idea of us being sisters, and it was her mother’s breach of trust that pained her. I wished she had confided in me about it, but she always passed it off, as did Shea. His mother allowed him to be battered and broken with her lies. I’m sure it tortured him emotionally to be so angry with his mother, knowing that if his father had known the truth, then his sister would have been beaten in his place. I knew that look of guilt that showed in his face because I saw it reflected in mine still, even after Shea had told me he didn’t want to know about my past. After everything we had just gone through, I knew with the utmost certainty that telling him about Garrison would now be the deal breaker.

  I had thrift stores pick up the furniture from my dad’s room and office and I donated several bags of resalable items. The downstairs rooms echoed as I passed by them on my way to the garage. Next week Shea would have a contractor come in and enlarge the fireplace in our bedroom. We had also picked out new carpet, drapes and bedding. He wanted a new bed, but the verdict was still out on that since I loved my sleigh bed.

  As I stood in the garage, I looked around at all the open space. This was a three-car garage, so technically I could put a car in here along with Shea’s, and even with the laundry facilities, we’d still have tons of space. Even though I had a license, I hadn’t driven in over thirteen years. As I had told Shea months ago, when living in New York, a car was not necessary and driving could be perilous.

  Eventually I wanted to find a job, even though now I was financially secure due to my dad’s estate. I certainly couldn’t be a just a housewife. Wait—where the hell did that come from? I’d never been a homebody, even as a teenager. I needed something in my life besides this house and Shea. He had found his purpose, now I needed to find mine. I had put all my eggs into one basket by believing I was going to be a big time actress. My dream had started coming to an end before I came back home. Yeah, I’d love to blame it on Alaska, but in reality what little career I had had begun to dissipate long before I got here. The only other skills I had were waitressing and retail, and honestly, I couldn’t see either of those being my purpose. I shook my head as I exited the garage and went back into the living room.

  I sighed as I slumped on the sofa, physically and mentally exhausted. I had a nice home, the love of my life, and a new sister. I should be content. My divorce would be final in less than ninety days, and I needed to figure out my life plan because Shea might not be around forever. I wanted him to be, I loved him and this life we were building, and I knew he loved me and that I was his everything right now. But at his young age, those feelings could change. My insecurities were battering my mind and I had to prepare for the day that he might not want me anymore.

  I groaned inwardly because of all the conflicting thoughts rolling around in my head. I had always been a strong, willfully outspoken woman, but in less than six months, I had been broken down. I was afraid to make Shea my life, I suddenly had insecurities about our relationship, and I didn’t want to be dependent on him. I was so in love with him I would sacrifice everything. I had always believed that acting was all I wanted, and it was my dream . . . until I came home. The first time Shea kissed me, I knew deep inside that I had been unequivocally changed. I had always believed that if I became an actress, then all my wishes would be fulfilled. The truth was I had no idea what I really wanted or what I was missing until Shea came back into my life. Everything I had ever yearned for I found in him. I heard the front door open as I felt cold air burst in. Shea leaned over me and kissed me, his lips chilled by the weather.

  “Ooh, you’re freezing,” I said as I got off the sofa, shivering.

  “It’s cold out there, you know.” He chuckled as he took off his heavy winter coat. “Have you been working all day?”

  “Yeah, I finally got rid of the last of the furniture.” I grabbed his hand and walked him to the empty rooms.

  “Wow, looks great,” he said, leaning up against the office wall. “I can’t wait till Bertram starts on the fireplace on Monday. Only a little over a week until we have a true master bedroom.” Shea pinned me with a stare as he pressed his body against mine to the wall.

  “What did you have in mind?” I questioned as my eyes attentively scanned his face.

  “So many things come to mind, but for right now, I think I want an appetizer before dinner,” he crooned, caressing my ear with a whisper. His body leaned in closer to mine as his arms caged me in on both sides. I could feel him, hard and thick, as he ground into my core. His hands made quick work of unzipping my pants and pushing them down. I moaned when he slid his tongue along my body as he went down on both knees.

  “Shea, I love it when you go down on your knees . . . it’s like equal opportunity rug burns,” I murmured.

  “Mmmm . . . nice and wet,” he mumbled thickly as he suckled the material of my thong. I pushed my hands through his hair, wanting him to get closer. “Fuck, you smell good enough it eat.” He smiled wolfishly as he tugged my panties down. He held my thighs apart and he slowly covered them with tiny kisses and bites. His mouth gradually worked its way to my mound, and I let out a guttural groan as he nuzzled my slick folds. My body began to tingle with excitement, and what he was doing was so intoxicating that I felt giddy with the sexual tension whipping throughout my body. I almost slid down the wall because I was so sensitized that my legs were like jello and my body felt like mush. I felt his hand spread my lips as one of his fingers dipped into me, tracking my wetness back and forth. My moaning echoed throughout the empty room. Since I was flush with the wall, I let go of his hair so I could stretch my arms out, using them to support me. Shea held me in place by switching between his finger and his tongue. My breathing had shortened to shallow pants by now and my body felt on fire. He gazed up at me while he pressed his thumb on my clit first, causing a tremor to pass through my body. He looked up at me with such intensity that my entire body felt electrified. He gently sucked on my clit, which made me push up and stand on my toes.

  “Shea, please, I can’t take anymore,” I squeaked out.

  He stopped, withdrawing both his mouth and finger. “You want me to stop?” he asked. I didn’t even have to look to know he was smirking.<
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  “Fuck no . . . can you maybe just move it a long?” I growled.

  I heard him chuckle, as his tongue slipped back into me. The sound and vibration caused my pussy to clench in anticipation. I took moved both my arms down and settled them on his head, pushing him deeper into me. I felt my body start to shake as his tongue centered right on my nub, making it both hard and slick. The sensations I was feeling began to overwhelm me. My entire body began shaking as wave after wave of pleasure rushed over me as I shuddered from the euphoria.

  “I love you,” I sobbed, because what I felt for Shea at that moment was so fierce, I wanted to possess him. His hands passed over my body as he stood up, his eyes questioning mine.

  “Baby, don’t cry,” he whispered as he held me, kissing my shoulder. “You’re supposed to be elated after an orgasm, not crying.”

  I had no idea why I was crying. What Shea had just done was delicious and, as usual, mind-blowing hot. I didn’t know why I was so damn emotional. He pulled my thong back up and then he adjusted himself. Grinning, he handed me my pants. Before I could even put them on, he scooped me up in his arms and carried me into the living room.

  “I’m ordering pizza,” he said, putting me down and taking out his cell phone. “You grab the beers first, and then you can tell me why you’re sad.” I listened as he ordered a large pizza with two salads. “Okay, you have thirty minutes or less to tell me what’s going on.”

  I put on my pants and sat on the sofa. I honestly didn’t have an explanation as to why I was sad. In the almost six months I had come home, so much had happened. My deepest paranoia was that I would get too happy and it would be taken away.

  “Tell me, baby, what is it?” Shea toed off his shoes and removed his tie, then sat next to me. “As much as I’d like to believe that orgasm was so mind blowing it made you cry, I’m pretty sure that’s not the case.”

  I shrugged my shoulders. “I have no idea what came over me. I’m feeling emotional, I guess.”

  His eyes widened and his lips curved into a smile. “Could you be pregnant?”

  I jumped up at that question, my eyes going wide with alarm. “Hell no! Why would you think that?” I wondered, scratching my head. “That’s all we need right now, after everything else that has happened—a baby. No fucking way, ever.” I’m sure it came out much harsher than I intended. I felt a sudden pang of hurt when I saw Shea’s face fall, disappointment written all over it.

  “Shea,” I said bending over to him. “You want me to be pregnant? I don’t know what to say.”

  “Obviously, you do know what to say. You made it quite clear that you never want to have a child with me—ever,” he said with a bitter smile.

  “I’m sorry . . . it came out wrong,” I told him, sitting down next to him. “I just meant right now would not be a good time for us. We’ve only been in each other’s lives barely six months. A child would tie us together forever, and I would never want to force you into making that kind of decision. It would be selfish of me.”

  “You still don’t get it, no matter how many times I tell you. You. Are. It. For. Me. Forever. I’ll never want anyone else.”

  I stood up and walked into the kitchen to get a couple bottles of beer. “You don’t know that. In a year or two you could change your mind . . . you never know,” I said, twisting off the bottle caps, as I thought about Garrison and how the knowledge about him and my marriage would affect Shea’s feelings.

  Shea grabbed the beer out of my hand. “Do you really think that? Jesus, I have loved you for years, do you think it was just my fantasy? Ryan, I want all of it—you, marriage, and babies. I’m all in, but you have to believe it, because I can’t do this by myself.”

  I took the bottle out of his hand, setting both the beers on the counter. I rubbed his cheek, pressing my fingers to his mouth. His teeth nipped me as I outlined his lips.

  “I will stay with you as long as you want me. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I love you so much, and I think I’m just scared. I’m so afraid this dream will just end, that you’ll wake up and not want me anymore.”

  “I can’t imagine wanting anyone else. Don’t sabotage us before we even get started. You put me through the ringer just to get this far, so don’t second guess us, because I never will.” As he finished his heartfelt declaration, the pizza delivery guy showed up and Shea moved to the door to get our food. When Shea opened the box, steamy goodness poured out, making my stomach growl with hunger. I grabbed a couple of plates and some napkins. We sat in the dining room and he placed a slice of pizza on my plate as I handed him a beer.

  “When did you get so smart and mature?” I asked with a bemused smile.

  Shea looked at me in-between bites of pizza. He put down his slice then reached for his beer, took a long drink, and leaned back in his chair.

  “Ryan, I’m not only smart and mature but also hot, great in bed, and kind of a good guy. Baby, I’m so the total package,” he bragged as he waggled his eyebrows, and then taunted me with his sexy chuckle as he lifted his beer.

  We clinked our beers in a toast and I rolled my eyes with his appraisal of himself, because there was no doubt that he was spot on.

  Chapter THIRTY-FOUR

  The ten days before Valentine’s Day were dusty, dirty, and damn noisy. I had no idea what a disturbance enlarging the fireplace and replacing the carpet would be. Shea had dragged my ass all over Fairbanks for two days straight because he wanted a new bed. He knew how much I loved my sleigh bed, and to me it seemed comfortable enough for both of us, but he had other ideas. He wanted a double king bed. When he told me, I just looked at him and asked him if he was planning on us having threesomes or foursomes. His reply? Even if I wanted to, it would still be a “hell, fuck no.” The bed we finally settled on was beautiful but massive, and we also purchased all new bedroom furniture. I was keeping my sleigh bed and furniture for one of the downstairs guest rooms. Our new bedroom was carpeted in a deep Egyptian blue plush wool blend, which was a good match against the rest of the gray carpeting throughout the house. The new furniture was a very dark walnut with different colors of blue for the bedding and drapes. Once it was all done, our new bedroom was going to be sensual, spacious, and inviting . . . our nest.

  Three days before Valentine’s Day, they finished our bedroom. The next day, Trina had called and wanted to go shopping. Thank God, because between the construction and Shea, I was going out of my mind. He appeared more than happy for me to be gone for a few hours, citing it would give him more than enough time to organize the new bedroom. The carpet had been put in and our new furniture had been delivered, but it was too much of a mess to sleep in yet . . . or as Shea grumbled, not enough room to christen it.

  I was grateful for some actual bestie-friend-sister bonding time. As much as I loved Trina’s brother, he had taken his vacation early in order to be home for the remodeling, and every day had felt like a scheduled event. Weren’t vacations supposed to be relaxing?

  “Thank God you called—your brother was driving me insane,” I declared as I got into her new candy apple red Corvette.

  Trina grinned as she backed out. “He drove me crazy for twenty-two years—your turn,” she informed me and chuckled at the thought.

  “I’m just amazed and happy that the remodel is finally done. I can’t wait until you see it. I mean, it’s only the bedroom but it’s incredible.” I paused to glide my hand over the smooth leather dash and inhale that new car smell. “You know, this is the first time I’ve actually been in your car . . . very nice.”

  “Yeah, I know, and it’s automatic,” she teased. “Maybe if you’re a nice sister, I might let you drive it sometime. You still have your license, right?”

  “One, I’m always nice and two, yes, I have a license but it’s pretty dusty. I should maybe practice driving Shea’s Bronco before I attempt to drive your fifty thousand dollar car,” I snickered.

  “Actually it was fifty three thousand, plus tax,” she corrected with a laugh, tur
ning into the mall.

  “Yup, that three grand makes a difference—you know you do have a very nice husband . . . this is some gift.” I said, returning her laughter.

  Quinn had ordered the Corvette especially for Trina since she used all of her portion of the estate money to fund her mother’s new place to live. He really was a considerate guy, and I was happy that both of us had good men.

  We ended up looking at shoes and perfume. Trina wanted to find something sexy to wear for Quinn on Valentine’s Day.

  “So are you and Andrew doing something on Valentine’s Day?” Trina said, spraying herself first, and then me, with a tester perfume.

  “Whoa, that stinks. Enough with the perfume, I’m starting to gag,” I said, as I put my hand over my mouth, pretending to cough.

  “We’ll probably go out to dinner and maybe over to Nasty’s for a drink. You and Quinn could come, you know?”

  “I don’t think I could get Quinn to go to Nasty’s, he’s a little too . . . what’s the word I’m looking for?” Trina’s eyebrows arched. “Tightly wound?”

  “Now see, I was going to say anal.” I laughed out loud as I grabbed yet another tester I knew Trina was thinking of dousing us with.

  “Well . . . yeah, okay, Quinn’s a little reserved, so Nasty’s just wouldn’t appeal to him.”

  “I get it. Just know one of these day maybe you and I will go there to hang out. It would be fun; we never got to do that because you weren’t legal. Besides we could fuck with Cray the owner, because why? We’re sisters!” I nudged her with my shoulder. “I don’t think we’ll find anything to wear that’s worthy of our men in this mall,” I said, pulling out my phone. I looked up lingerie shops and I found something interesting. I took a pen from my purse and jotted down the address.