“That’s interesting,” he says. This is the first time I’ve found the silence between us uncomfortable.
“Interesting?” That’s it?
“Mmm-hmm.”
“Which part?” I whisper.
“All of it.” He shrugs.
“So… do you think I’m crazy?” I have to ask although I don’t know if I really want to know the answer.
“Of course not.” Liam manages a small smile, but I can tell that he isn’t sure now how to act or what to say.
“It’s a lot to take in.” I say in encouragement.
“Yeah.”
“You believe me then?”
“Why wouldn’t I?”
I shrug. “I don’t know. I guess because I’ve just told you that I can see ghosts. It’s not exactly the most normal… situation? Most people don't believe in ghosts anyway, so for me to tell you this was a bit difficult.”
“Well, it’s not like you’re scaring me if that’s what you’re afraid of. I’ll take you, invisible friend and all.”
“You’re taking this awfully well,” I note. I’m still waiting for him to run away.
“I suppose,” he shrugs. “What did you expect me to do?”
“I dunno. Go screaming into the night, maybe?”
“Naw. It takes a bit more to scare me off.”
“You really do believe me?” I ask doubtedly.
“Yes, Breckin, I do.”
Liam’s smile widens to the nonchalance of his attitude and I instantly feel better. He’s right; I’m afraid of scaring him. A perfectly good fear if I’m being honest. But I still can’t believe how well he’s taking the news of my gift. It’s made my fear of telling him seem very silly now. I need to stop underestimating him.
“Why don’t you tell me about this man?” he says.
I shudder at the memory of his dark empty eyes and the blinding pain I experience whenever he happens to appear. Liam notices my tremble and pulls me into an embrace close to his body. He rocks me slowly back and forth as if I’m an infant needing to be soothed and I find the warmth of his body comforting. I suck in the sweet springtime scent of his skin and close my eyes.
“You don’t want to talk about him,” he murmurs softly. “All right then, why don’t you tell me about Sera. Is that an acceptable subject to discuss?”
I smile then, but for two reasons. First, because Liam is taking the news of my gifted ability so much better than I’d ever hoped to expect. And second, because I’m thrilled that he genuinely seems interested.
“Yes, that’s okay.” I agree happily.
“Okay, start at the beginning. Your first memory of her.”
I peer up to him in disbelief. “That’s quite a long time ago. You really want to hear all that?”
Liam leans down to kiss me. “Yes, I really want to hear all that,” he says after pulling his lips from mine. “Tell me about Sera.”
Chapter Fourteen
“This may take a while,” I warn.
“I told you, Camille will want me to make sure that you’re okay. And if that means for me to stay and listen to your story, well then I’m willing to make that sacrifice even if it means I need to stay here all night.”
I’m instantly sidetracked to the thought of Liam staying all night. The idea of that is so appealing. Just to be able to lay in his arms long into the hours of darkness. However, I’m positive that Elly won’t allow that. Trustworthy I am, but my mother would surely draw the line at Liam staying in my room with me into the wee hours of the morning.
He keeps his arms wrapped around me and kicks his shoes off to the floor. Liam then leans our bodies back so that our heads are laying on my pillow. He takes the same hand that he’d been tracing circles on and makes it so that our palms are touching, our fingers lined in perfect synchronization with the ends of his folding easily over the tips of mine. It’s completely dark in my room except for the light lingering from the living room, a soft beam of light traveling down the short hall subtly pouring in, giving everything around us a dreamlike glow. Liam runs his fingers down the length of mine, tickling my skin again before intertwining our hands. He inclines his face down to kiss my hair.
“Please. Now that we’re comfortable, go on with your story.”
“What would you like to know?” I ask, not sure how to begin.
“Why don’t you tell me about your first memory of Sera,” he encourages.
I lay quietly for a moment, gathering my thoughts. I struggle to place each memory of Sera – there are so many – into order. Liam patiently waits, not seeming to mind the quiet between us. Like me, I notice that silence is something Liam often lingers in. A small part of me wonders if that’s partly due to his heart wrenching time after he’d lost her. He’d been so disoriented at the time, in his own misery which is something I can only faintly begin to imagine. So it would seem natural to me that he would easily be distracted by silence.
“I’m not sure if this is the first memory, but it has to be one of them,” I start, my voice just more than a whisper. It isn’t fear of speaking that keeps my voice low; it’s the dull ache in my throat that keeps me quiet.
“All right. I’m ready.” I can hear a smile in his voice.
“Sera came to me at a very young age. I have to admit that she kinda scared me. I was alone one minute, and then the next she was sitting next to me like she’d been there the entire time. I wasn’t sure what to think of her. She had this light about her that made her appear as if she were glowing. Of course I've always had an overactive imagination, so part of me thought that she might just be someone from one of the dreamy, colorful worlds I’d made up in my head. I remember slowly reaching my hand out to her after the shock of seeing her wore off. Just as I raised my hand, she, too, raised hers mirroring mine. That's when I learned that you can’t touch a ghost and that they can’t touch you. My hand traveled all the way through hers.
“When she’s around, I always know it. I can feel her. It's almost like little rays of sunshine come to wrap all the way around me. She can calm me when I'm feeling anxious or scared. She's stubborn like me, too. At times she can be bossy, but she'd never admit that.
“There’s one incident in particular that sticks out more than others, though, because that's the first time she got me into trouble with one of her brilliant idea's. I was probably around three and Sera and I were in my room. I was looking for a toy in my toy box and couldn’t find it. Sera mentioned that it might be easier to find if I would just take every toy I had out of the box. I argued, but like I said, she can be a Miss Bossy Pants. So I did it.
“My mom came into my room shortly after – she was tired after working the night shift at the hospital – and asked me to please pick up my toys. Well, my entire floor was covered in dolls, puzzles, crayons, books... Elly was in a hurry to go somewhere and so I didn’t want to take the time in putting things away the right way. It would take too long and I didn’t like upsetting her. I wasn’t sure what exactly to do with the mess however, so Sera told me to just shove everything under my bed and we’d take care of it all later. I argued that that wasn’t a good idea, but Sera insisted that it would be fine. Again, Bossy Betty.
“After a few minutes, my mom came back into my room and was impressed at how fast I’d taken care of everything… until she came around the side of my bed and stepped on a Barbie. I had a guilty look spread across my face and as she read my expression – that always gives everything away apparently – she slowly leaned down to look under my bed.”
I feel Liam lightly laughing under me, and whether it’s for my benefit or he really does find my story funny, I don’t know. But I’ll take his good humor either way.
“Needless to say, I was made to take care of everything the right way. I can’t remember though if it was before or after we’d gone where we had to be. After that, she's been with me every day since.”
Liam runs his fingers through my hair and all that I hear for a few moments is our quiet breathin
g. Our breaths seem to be synchronizing, and I readjust my head so that I can lay on his chest. I listen to the beating of his heart, noticing that both our hearts are beating together just as they had that night at the Schumacher’s farm.
“Where does she come from? Does she just appear out of nowhere then?” he asks quietly. “Does she look like I do, as if she were really here?”
I shrug. “Sera is always around in a sense. Yes, she quite often appears out of nowhere and I have to admit, that after nearly eighteen years of her doing that, I never get used to it. And she really is here. But yes, most times she appears to me as anyone else does.”
“Has she always been a… ghost?” Liam’s voice catches on the last word.
“No,” I smile. “She has a history like most everyone else. Sera has been here… on Earth… or in this type of life, whichever you want to call it, before. Actually like thirty-something times before.” I don’t know how Liam will take this information. I keep my ear against his chest. If he feels any type of uncertainty or unease, his heart doesn’t give it away. It continues to beat in unison with mine.
I continue on this time without his encouragement. I’m still surprised at how easily the words flow, but most of all I’m thrilled to bits that he’s listening to me. And also, to know that he doesn’t think I’m delusional or need some type of therapy.
“She’s told me dozens of stories. Her last time here… that’s the story that sticks out the most for me.”
“Why is that?”
“Because it’s not a particularly good one.”
“Oh. I see.”
“Do you want to hear it?”
“Only if you want to tell me. I’m not going to make you tell me anything you don’t want to.”
“Ha!”
“What?” he says, surprised.
“I seem to remember just a short few minutes ago someone threatening not to leave until I explained what had really happened to me tonight.”
“True.” Liam smirks.
I think about what he’s asking. Will I be betraying Sera’s confidences by telling Liam her stories? I quickly recall the many nights Sera and I had stayed up late discussing her past. There is so much she’s lived through, so much history. Her tales are better than any mundane text book. Better than any rendition or reenactment from a movie, or play, or lecture. Sera’s stories are personal and raw. Just as I’m squandering with my internal dispute, Sera appears.
“Of course you can tell Liam about me. I’m incredibly impressed that you’ve told him anything at all about your gift,” she beams. “This is good progress!”
The way she says the word gift makes me roll my eyes. Lately I’m considering my so-called talent to be more of a plague.
“It’s probably better that you don’t,” Liam says after the long silence.
“No, I want to.” I say quickly. I sit up to read his face then for the next part – I want to see his reaction. “She’s here now.”
It takes Liam the length of two heartbeats to realize what I mean. His beautiful eyes scan my almost black room spastically as if he’ll be able to see her. His brows furrow the tiniest bit and his entire body appears to tense infinitesimally. I reach over to touch his face with my hand and he automatically leans his face into my palm. I run my thumb over his wrinkled eyebrows.
“Are you all right?”
Liam nods beneath my touch.
“Do you want me to go on?” I ask.
“He looks a little sick,” Sera notes. “Maybe you should get him something.”
Like what? I think sarcastically. A pill? Not thinking they make a magic potion for just realizing there’s a ghost in the room. Give him a minute.
At first I think Sera is just being smart, but as I appraise him, I notice that he does look a little ill.
“Are you sure you’re okay? You don’t look so good.”
“I’m fine,” he chokes while shaking off my hand. “I just…”
“Just…?”
Liam shakes his head again. “Nothing. So she’s here? Is it all right with Sera if you tell me about her?”
Just as fast as Liam’s expression has turned toward discomfort, he composes his beautiful face back to his normal calm expression. It causes me to wonder how much practice he’s had with this to perfect that little talent. It’s obvious that it’s something he’s used to doing. Then it makes me wonder how much awful he’s experienced in his life to be able to compose himself so quickly.
I take in his expression once more before continuing. I’ve seen that look before; the one that makes him look unwell. It’s not a look of unease or poor health that Liam appears to be suffering from though. In the short minute he’d let his guard down, I noticed that his face held the same despair that he had been consumed with earlier today. It’s sadness that overcame him. I make a mental note to ask him about it. If I’m being brutally honest, then it’s only fair to expect the same from him.
“Sera’s full name is Seraphina. I shortened it to Sera when I was younger because I couldn’t say her entire name. It came out like a jumbled mess, a lot like when I used to talk to you.” I laugh at the memory of how hard it used to be to talk to Liam. Not that I didn’t want to talk to him, more that I couldn’t spit the words out.
“What?” Liam asks when I continue to laugh.
“Nothing. It’s just that I used to be so nervous to talk to you. You left me tongue-tied.”
Liam wraps his arms around me. “Why? I’m not that scary, am I?”
“No, you’re not scary at all. I was just so consumed by your very presence. I couldn’t come up with a coherent thought. And a lot of the time it was like I had the breath knocked out of me so that I couldn’t speak.”
Liam smiles in a way that takes my breath away as if to prove my point.
“See,” I whisper.
He then kisses me so softly and sweetly I have to fight to remember what we were talking about.
“Where were we?” he asks when he pulls his lips from mine.
“Uh…”.
“Seraphina,” he encourages.
“Right. So her name is Seraphina and her last time here in human form was over three-hundred years ago. She lived in a time much different from ours.” I begin with more coherency. It’s easy to tell the story being I’ve heard it so many times. “She was the youngest in her family. Sera had two older sisters, Effie and Greer. She had an older brother as well, his name was Blaine. They all called her Sera, too – it was much shorter to say. Her siblings always picked on her because she was the only one with red hair. Her mother was dark haired as well as the rest of them. Her father had dirty blonde hair, so they all couldn't figure out why she'd gotten blessed with the red. Maybe that’s where the term ‘redheaded step child’ stemmed from.
“Her parents had decided to move the family to America in the early seventeen-hundreds. They were coming overseas from Scotland and her parents had big dreams for this new found land. There weren’t many ships sailing that carried passengers; most ships were made for trading voyages. Sera’s father knew one of the crewman aboard the ship and he agreed to allow their passage in trade for her father’s land. It was next to the crewman's land and he was excited to expand. That gave him the largest property in their area. Back then, that was a big deal. Since they were leaving all they knew behind, it wasn’t such a hard thing to agree to for Sera's father.
“Sera and her family didn’t have much in belongings, so there wasn’t much to carry in the way of luggage. All they took were a couple of big trunks full of clothes and a few items that had sentimental value. A few family heirlooms and some food. Unfortunately, their presence on the boat wasn't something they were allowed to discuss so they were forced to fend for themselves. Sera was crafty and weaved hammocks out of thick sail ropes for her and her siblings. Her parents slept on empty burlap sacks. They stayed way below deck, like with the rats.
“Sera was around fifteen when they decided to make the journey. Her parents didn’t
have a set plan per se for when they moved, but they had high hopes they would settle in without any trouble. Her father aspired to build a grand house and try his hand in business in hopes to build up his name as a prestigious businessman – something the newspapers promised to people hoping to bait them. Her mother was always willing and eager to follow in whatever direction her husband wanted to go, a very good wife in that way, but she was very excited to the thought of making the transition from rags to riches; the papers painted a very pretty picture. She would tell the girls that when their father made his business and became the most sought-after gentleman in their new town, that she would hire seamstresses to come in and fashion them the newest and prettiest of dresses. This all excited the girls, but her brother couldn’t have cared less.
“Blaine was angry with the news of the move – he had a girl he’d come to love. He was planning on asking her father for her hand in marriage. Neither of her parents wanted her to go with him so they declined his request. I can’t remember her name…”
“Annabel.” Sera interjects.
“That’s right. Annabel. Thank you, Sera.”
Liam’s already tight embrace strengthens around me then. I’m not sure if it’s in reaction to my story or to my answering Sera aloud.
“That must’ve been very difficult for him. To leave her behind,” he murmurs in a raspy voice.
I nod. “I’m sure it was, although it was probably a blessing in disguise. Blaine threatened to stay behind, but since his father had promised his land to the deck hand, he didn’t have anything except for Annabel to stay behind for. Her parents didn’t like him much unfortunately. She was upper class and her parents didn’t think it appropriate for their one and only daughter to marry a farmer’s son. You know, it wasn’t considered proper in those times to marry outside your social class.”
Liam kisses the top of my head. “Sometimes love is all that’s left to fight for.”
Hollow Sight Page 30