Plan Cee (Secrets, Lies, and Second Chances Book 2)

by Hilary Grossman

  “Yeah, but McGrevor wanted to meet today. It was easier to just come into the office than deal with setting up a different date with him. He gets testy so easily. Besides, Connie was planning on taking all the kids to Adventureland today, so it was really easy to juggle my schedule.” Anna sat down, “I was curious how you enjoyed your afternoon yesterday. I wanted to know what you did, but now I really don’t care. I’m way more interested in finding out what is going on with you and Meredith.” She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “What’s the deal?”

  I fiddled with a paperclip that was lying on my desk. All night long I contemplated if I should tell Anna about yesterday. I was torn. Sure, she was my best friend, but she also introduced me to Bryce. Our husbands grew up together and had been friends since they were very young. I didn’t want to put her in an uncomfortable position. I also felt I had any choice but to talk to her. I needed a friend, and clearly I couldn’t count on Meredith anymore.

  “I had a very interesting afternoon yesterday,” I smiled. “I went to the beach.”

  “Nice!” She squealed. “It was a perfect day for it.”

  “Yeah it was, but…” I paused. I tried to avoid eye contact. “It’s not what you think, though. I went there to see Keith. He’s renting a house in Atlantic Beach for the summer.”

  Anna’s eye’s bulged as she sat up straighter in her chair. “You what? Why would you do that?”

  I took a deep breath. “I had to see him. I tried really hard after the wedding to keep him out of my mind. I was doing a really good job, too. Well that is until he sent me this.” I reached into my desk drawer and pulled out the letter. I handed it to her. I felt my stomach flutter as I watched her eyes scan the paper. Her face was expressionless. Slowly she folded the letter up and placed it back into the envelope.

  “Quite powerful,” she said as she handed it back to me.

  I licked my lip. “Yeah, I know.”

  “The white dress you wore yesterday. You know the one you’ve been obsessed with. Did he give it to you?”

  I nodded my head slowly, “Yes.”

  “Well, one mystery solved, I guess.” She clasped her hands together and held them up to her lips, just like she always did when she was lost in thought. “Have you shown this to anyone else?”

  I paused for a second, again unsure if I should be honest. Quietly, I muttered, “Yes. I did. Yesterday I read it to your mother.”

  “My mother?” She stood up and started to pace around my office. “Why on Earth would you read this letter to my mother?”

  “I know it’s odd. I didn’t really plan to. I called her house looking for Walter. I wanted to ask his advice, since he’s a friend of Keith’s, you know. He wasn’t home. So Bea and started talking.” I smiled. “She was really helpful, actually.”

  Anna’s eyes clouded over. She looked hurt. “It’s sad, I spent my entire life trying to get her attention and acceptance. She never once was there for me when I had a problem and here she is dishing out advice to you. Wow.”

  I didn’t know what to say. I could imagine how she felt, but her reaction was upsetting, nonetheless. I wasn’t sure if I should tell her about the lunch I had with Bea. I hated how lying and hiding the truth was becoming second nature to me.

  Anna reached across my desk and grabbed my hands. She gave me a small smile. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t be mad. I should be happy she was able to help youI guess I’m just hurt. Not because my mother was so helpful to you. I’m upset when you needed advice and someone to talk to you turned to Walter, and then my mother, instead of me.” She stared at the ceiling as if she was doing long division. “Clearly weeks passed since you received this letter. Why didn’t you talk to me about it before now?”

  “I don’t know. I guess I was hoping if I ignored it I would be able to go back to living my life without thinking about my past.” I took a sip of water, “But I couldn’t.”

  Anna was silent for a moment. “Cecelia, I know we’re different. You hold so much of what you feel inside. You know it drives me crazy, I’m supposed to be your best friend. I want to be here for you when you’re upset, need advice, or even just a shoulder to cry on.”

  I nodded.

  “Seriously, Cee. You can always talk to me, about anything. I know this has to be hard for you. Don’t go it alone. Please.”

  “Okay,” I said and gave her a small smile. “I’ll try.” I knew confiding to her would help me sort my feelings out. However, when you had spent decades trying to bury your emotions it was difficult to let them all come tumbling out. The thought made me feel so vulnerable.

  Anna reached into the candy bowl I kept on my desk and grabbed a mini Snickers bar. As she unwrapped the chocolate she asked, “So what do you make of the letter? Do you believe he felt, or better yet, feels the way he wrote?”

  I grabbed a piece of candy too. “I didn’t at first. After spending some time with him yesterday, and really talking to him, I think maybe he does.”

  “Well for someone who cared about you as much as he claimed, he sure had a funny way of showing it.” She absently refolded the wrapper. “Personally, I don’t believe him for a second. If he cared about you he wouldn’t have let all these years pass with no communication.”

  I picked up a pen and started to doodle. “Yeah, well that’s the interesting part. He told me he did come looking for me. He said Meri told him…”

  The ringing of my cell phone stopped me from completing my sentence. I picked it up and glanced at the caller ID. “Speak of the devil,” I snarled. I took a deep breath, “Hi Meredith.”

  “I’ll go,” Anna mouthed.

  I shook my head, no. Anna could at least listen to my side of the conversation and spare me the task of having to repeat the story later.

  “Oh, Cee! I’m so sorry I missed your call. Gregg and I just landed in St. Louis. We’re on the way to the hotel to drop off our bags and change clothes. Our plane was delayed for two-and-a-half hours. We’re totally going to be late for our first meeting, and you know how I hate being late. You didn’t sound right on your message so I wanted to call you back as soon as I could. What’s up? Is something wrong?”

  Determined to keep my voice steady and strong, “Yeah, Meri. I’m upset. It’s very unsettling to find out someone you thought was a dear friend of yours stabbed you in the back.”

  “Oh my God! What did Anna do?” She sounded outraged.

  I shook my head from side to side and closed my eyes. “I’m not talking about, Anna. I am talking about you.”

  “I don’t understand.”

  “How could you have never told me that Keith came looking for me after we broke up?” I looked over at Anna whose mouth hung open.

  “What?”

  “You heard me, Meri. How could you have let twenty years pass and not tell me once, the guy you knew I was head over heals in love with, came by the apartment to see me? How could you make him think I was in Philadelphia with my boyfriend? You knew damn well Joshua and I weren’t involved?”

  “I didn’t want him to hurt you again. Oh, Cecelia, you were finally starting to get out of your funk. You didn’t need him breaking your heart again.”

  “Oh, really? Who died and made you the relationship maven? How did you know he’d break my heart again? And even if he would have, didn’t I deserve to have a say in my life?”

  “I was trying to protect you.”

  “Oh, please. Cut the crap, Meredith. I didn’t need protecting. I needed to know he cared about me. Instead I spent twenty years thinking I was nuts! I spent twenty damn years missing a man I felt never cared about me. I went on more first dates than I could possibly count. I always found something wrong with every single one of the guys. And do you want to know why? After all, there really wasn’t anything wrong with them.” A tear rolled down my face and Anna handed me a tissue. “The only thing that was ever wrong with them was they weren’t Keith.”

  “How did you find out, anyway?” Meri questioned.


  “How did I find out?” I repeated loudly for Anna’s sake. “Wow. I guess I’m dumber than I thought. I expected you’d apologize.” I sighed, “I found out because Keith told me.”

  “What? You saw him. When?”

  “Yesterday.”

  “Well, what happened?”

  “It’s none of your concern what happened. Do you really think I am going to confide in you, now? You’re not my friend. You haven’t been for years. I just didn’t realize it.”

  “Don’t you think you are being a bit dramatic, Cee? You’re right, I probably did handle things wrong. I was young and naïve too. Are you really going to throw away our friendship over one little incident?”

  I grabbed the stress ball on my desk and started squeezing it tightly. I’ve broken a few of them over the years and this one was bound to be my next casualty. “Little incident? You lied to me! You interfered with my life, and you kept a life-changing secret from me for twenty damn years! I think what you did is far more than one little incident, Meri.”

  “You’re unbelievable,” she mumbled.

  I wanted to punch her. “What did you say? Never mind! What’s unbelievable is why you did what you did. It took me a while, but I finally figured it out.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  She was grating on my last nerve. It was a good thing she was in St. Louis. If she were in the city, I probably would’ve already been on the next train to Penn Station so I could pummel her.

  “I wracked my brain all night long trying to make sense of it. Finally, I remembered the weekend I went to Philly with Joshua, clear as a bell,” I winked at Anna. “I felt bad. I didn’t want to leave you, but I didn’t have a choice, it was our biggest client’s annual fundraising event. Joshua and I had to help with the presentations. Katie was visiting her parents in Chicago and you were a heartbroken little mess after you walked into your fiancé’s apartment and found him screwing the girl from down the hall.”

  Anna was stared at me, unblinking.

  Meri’s silence proved to me I was right.

  “It must have killed you to see Keith standing outside our door, holding a bouquet of flowers; looking for me a year after we broke up, knowing there was the possibility he wanted me back. You knew how hard it must have been for him to come after me, you were jealous and angry. You didn’t want me to be happy when you were so miserable. So you made Keith think I was in a relationship with another man. God… you let me live my life thinking he never cared about me. I’m glad I finally found out the truth, about him and about you.” I refused to give her a chance to speak. I didn’t want to hear any lies or any explanations. I disconnected the call and tossed my iPhone down on my desk as I muttered to myself, “Goodbye.”

  I stared at Anna, “Oh my God, Anna. I can’t believe she did this to me.”

  Anna walked over, and I stood up. She wrapped her arms around me tightly. “You’re trembling.”

  “I know. I’m in shock I had to have this conversation with her.” I broke free of the embrace. “How did I sound on the phone? I tried really hard to sound strong. I didn’t want her to know I was on the verge of tears.”

  “You did great. I know that wasn’t easy. You are tough, Cecelia.”

  “I don’t know…”

  “Well, I do. What are you going to do now, Cee?” She looked concerned. “About, you know, everything?”

  “Honestly. I have no idea.”

  CHAPTER NINETEEN

  KEITH

  I leaned back in my chair and raised my arms over my head to stretch. No matter how hard I tried, I just couldn’t focus on the case file sprawled out in front of me. I must have read the same page fifteen times, yet none of the words were sunk in. I still had no concept of what the plaintiff’s attorney was trying to prove, nor did I care. I was screwed. Day one of the trial was scheduled for tomorrow morning, and I was completely unprepared.

  I usually waited until the day before a case was scheduled for trial to review the file. I hated to waste time if the lawsuit was settled beforehand, which was a regular occurrence. Also, by procrastinating, the facts and arguments remained fresh in my mind. I’ve never once sat on the bench unprepared for a case. And yet, I had a sneaking suspicion, I very well may be doing that tomorrow morning if I wasn’t able to pull myself together fast.

  I kept going over yesterday afternoon in my head. I felt like such a fool. I completely blew it. I had one chance to spend time with Cecelia and what did I do? I made a mess of it! What the hell was I thinking, opening my big mouth like I did? I had wanted to catch up with her and just hang out, laugh, enjoy her company. I was desperate to relive a small sliver of our past, and we did for a little while.

  I just couldn’t leave well enough alone. I should never have told her I went to her apartment all those years ago. At the time, I thought letting her know I did try to fight for her would make her feel better. I had no idea my plan would backfire. How was I to know she wasn’t seriously involved with someone else at the time?

  As soon as she realized what Meri did, she was so sad and hurt. She didn’t even try to hide her feelings. When she said, she thought of herself as unlovable my heart broke in two, but that’s not what was keeping my mind off of my work. There was one second; right after I told her she was unforgettable, something about her changed. Her eyes softened. Her body relaxed and she leaned in towards me ever so slightly. I was positive she was going to kiss me and then she was gone. Clearly, she was still a sprinter. I tried to catch up to her. Even though I jogged every morning, I didn’t stand a chance. By the time I got to the bottom of the boardwalk ramp, panting like an old man, I saw her car speed away.

  I picked up my iPhone and started to nervously fiddle with it, twirling it around and tapping it on my desk.

  “Hey, Keith,” Millie my assistant popped her head in my doorway. “I’m ordering from Jordan’s. Want the usual?”

  I glanced at the clock on my wall, “How did it get so late?” I asked more myself than my assistant. “Nah. I need a change today,” I replied. “Can you get me a turkey sandwich on rye, with cheddar cheese, tomato, and mayo?”

  Millie squinted at me, “Since when do you eat a sandwich for lunch?”

  “Told ya I needed a change. I can’t handle one more Greek salad from that joint.”

  “Want me to order from someplace else? Chinese? Mexican?”

  “No. I’m good.” I smiled and she walked away.

  I picked up the case file and started reading again. I somehow managed to get through every page by the time Millie placed my sandwich in front of me. I’d be lying if I said the facts fully sunk in, but at least I wouldn’t be completely clueless tomorrow.

  I picked up the sour pickle that came with my lunch and took a bite. “What do I have to lose?” I muttered to myself and picked up my cell.

  I texted the number I never was able to delete from my phone.

  It’s Keith. Just wanted to check that you were OK. Sorry about yesterday…

  I took a bite of my sandwich and grimaced. I wished I went with the usual. I never was a fan of turkey but this was Cecelia’s favorite lunch. It was weird, when someone was missing from your life you clung to small things that brought back big memories of them. My phone chirped alerting me to an incoming text. I smiled. I didn’t think she’d write back so quickly.

  Cecelia: Hmmm do you think I wouldn’t recognize your number?

  Me: You could have blocked it completely from your memory.

  Instantaneously she answered.

  Cecelia: Yeah… unfortunately I don’t think that’s possible. It hasn’t happened yet.

  I took a large sip of soda.

  Me: Lucky me! I think…

  Cecelia: LOL… Keep wondering… confusion is good for you!

  Me: Good to know. I get confused a lot.

  I crumbled up the wrapper my lunch came in and tossed it in the trash as I waited for a reply.

  Cecelia: Yeah. Some things I guess never change…


  Me: Easy girl…remember I am not the one who once shook sugar all over their lasagna instead of Parmesan cheese… Just saying.

  Cecelia: It was intentional!

  Me: I didn’t believe you then, I still don’t.

  I smiled at the memory. She was so stubborn. She was so wrapped up in telling me a story about a fight Meri and Katie had she wasn’t paying attention to what she was doing. When I tried to stop her, she refused to admit she made a mistake. I guess it didn’t help I was hysterically laughing at the time. She ended up eating the entire sugar coated dish.

  Me: So you never answered my question. R U OK?

  Cecelia: Yeah. I’m OK. Sorry I ran…

  Me: So am I…

  Ten minutes passed with no reply.

  Me: So did you speak to Meri?

  Cecelia: Speaking is kind for what I did. I wish I knew about it sooner. Everything could have been different…

  Me: True. We can’t change the past, so no point in dwelling on it. The present is just a finite moment. It doesn’t stay. It quickly becomes the past. Which is why we need to focus on the future…

  Cecelia: Deep… I’m impressed!

  Me: I’m full of surprises Speaking of the future, am I pushing my luck? Can we meet again?

  I expected silence once more. Instead she didn’t miss a beat…

  Cecelia: Maybe…talk soon XOXO

  CHAPTER TWENTY

  CECELIA

  “Cecelia Reynolds,” I said mechanically. I didn’t take my eyes off my computer monitor as I answered my office line. I was completing the finishing touches on John McGrevor’s website, and I just couldn’t get the border the right shade of navy blue. I was so over this project already.

  “Don’t you ever check caller ID?” He asked as he let out a deep throaty laugh.

  I smiled, “Nope! Never! You should know that by now.”